#moxygent

Anyway, I wanted to stay in hospital due to the whole 'come to from seizure and start choking and can't breathe'. But they wouldn't let me, even when I started crying from fear. Sent me home, said the neurologist would check my EEG results and get back to me on Monday. The rest of the test results I'd get back within 2 weeks. 

My good friend Laura came over on Friday to check up on me. We watched movies, ate ice cream with strawberries and cookie crumble, and talked about the boy that's been hitting on her.

Spent the weekend between seizuring and laying down also playing Xbox with my big brother who came to visit and cheer me up. Gamed through the whole of X-men Destiny from start to finish, that was fun. He also tried to give me life advice and talked about reincarnation. I'm not sure if I understood all of it but that may be due to post seizure brain fogginess. 

It's Monday now. I spent all day attached to the phone and watching random stuff on TV. Due to the increase in seizure violence (the seizures are full body and apparently I look like I'm possessed now... also come to sometimes with scratches now because I get into the recovery position if I know it's coming and my grip went haywire during the seizure.) and the choking, I'm a little worried.

Oh also, I'm not allowed:

to go to university

actually scratch that, I'm not even allowed to leave the house on my own

leave any door closed

get a job

I'm broke too. I would go see student support but I'm not allowed to go there on my own.

I don't even have any credit on my phone.

Also the hallucinations are really freaking me out. And I'm pretty lonely and scared here.

Keep trying to write but nothing comes out.