Hi I stalked your tiktok stories. đ what do youuuuu think having a homoerotic friendship with ryoushu would be like
-ezzy
A/n ăFirst time doing a headcanon format, if this is unsatisfactory (for me) I'll crash out
Ryoshu, once faced with an almost one-sided friendship, is an odd one. A friendship that's not quite normal, but it is a label. She supposes.
When talking about things such as romantic relationships, crushes, co workers, anything. She seems to get unusually quieter the more you egg on the idea of having a puppy crush on another sinner. The conversation always ends with her swiftly shifting the topic back into one of her interests.
Eventually, once you two reach deeper into the friendship, you find Ryoshu lighting her cigarettes with your lighters more oftenâ Putting the cigarette on her lips, looking at you with a knowing look and leaning into the fire, hah, only the head knows what rate your hearts beating.
When faced with certain IDS, N corp, contempt awe Ryoshu as exhibit A, she manages to always remain by your side. Unchanging in her position unless you do it first. Her passives, defenses, clashes might be more biased towards you. Depends on the ID, maybe. (Exhibit B: Mao Branch Ryoshu: Did three unopposed attacks as soon as she caught wind of you getting staggered.)
Things happen to friendships, you understandâ don't you? Ryoshu swears up and down that she wouldn't care if you were to date someone else as she's only your friend. Only for the air to change instantly once you've declined her offer to hang out in favor of a date. You swore you'd never see Ryoshu this off putting ever again in your life.
When faced with intimacy, there are many levels, sometimes you find yourself cuddling up against her side while she puts an almost-protective arm on your waist, sometimes it's you and her in a dimly lit room, the light source coming from one of her cigarettes while she slowly inhalesâ before kissing you and putting the smoke right into your mouth in the process. This, of course, resulted in many coughs and heaves, you learnt to predict it coming anyways.
Jokingly, sometimes, Ryoshu calls you her spouse. You in return call her your boyfriendâ The sinners gave you two knowing looks for the rest of the week after that particular incident. Hah, you always found yourself warming up to that idea more than you should.
At some point, one special night, you two were side to side, outside of the busâ Ryoshu, as always, was lighting up another cigarette while you were enjoying the scenery of the Nest. Something led to another, you were unbearably close to Ryoshu up to the point where you could smell the faint aroma of iron, something rustic. Ryoshu grabbed your handâ trailing it up from her shoulders to her neck before eventually, your fingers found her pulse point. That moment felt too intimateâ For both Ryoshu and You.
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Alas, the lighter's flame struck against the pale coverings of the cigarette. A deep ache settling between your heart the more people came in the club, your stomach felt as if it was going through it's own voyage at the seasâ maybe it already is with the substances you've gulped down. Sailing beautifully towards your throat once it's had enough.
" Mm. " You don't answer Bari's question immediately. The lady was niceâ More patient than anyone you've recalled interacting at this moment. " Probably. " It's too late for this, you don't carry a watch. You can't recall why.
The melodyâ remix of it, actually, buzzed against your heart. Each beat making it feel as if it's jumping between oceans. One moment it's dropping and buzzing, the next.. it's all the same. You swallowed back your bileâ even if you didn't swallow anything but the various drinks the place had given you.
You're nauseous. You noted the first thing before trying to return to your sensesâ Probably from the alcohol or the cigarettes making its works known. You couldn't care less.
Cold. You noted second, it's cold out. And you don't have the company you expected to have in this place. Only the warmth of a hand on your shoulder, lazily slung over in an attempt to get you closer, probably.
" Do you have a ride, ____? "
" Mm, I'll walk home. " You mumbled. Looking at the roadside. Bari took a momentâ Fanning away the smoke that came with the cigarette you were inhaling.
" Alright, where do you live? " What?
You tilted your head to the side. An act of confusion you've seen in the countless cringey romcoms you've been watching.
" I'll drive you there. Where do you live? "
Oh, that's what she meant, through your drunken haze, you started to try and recall the address that was supposed to be engraved in your mind.
The scent of blood was nauseating as it surrounded me, only growing stronger and stronger as more of it poured from my throat. The two holes from the rodent-like pointed teeth burned as the air hit, and the venom coursed hot through my veins. I felt like I might explode as I writhed around in pain, trying not to cry out, but gasping for air. My fist clenched around a sharp rock, but it did nothing to redirect the pain. I was sure I was dying. It hurt too much for me to not die from this. The vampire might not have drained me, but surely the venom was killing me. I was positive I was going to die, and I was begging God to get it over with already.
[ID: El Goonish Shive comic panel. Grace, a pointy-eared humanoid, looks to an anthropomorphized brain in desperation. She asks, "Brain! What do I do with this information!" The brain holds up a sign that says, "This is somewhat tangential, but I recommend counseling. You've been through a lot." She replies plaintively, "Oh, that's what you ALWAYS say!" /end ID]
âHey, Tommy, can I talk to you about something real quick?â Dream asked, closing his front door behind him as he walked into his house. His son was sprawled out on the couch in their living room, scrolling through his phone and pausing to look up before looking right back down.
âSure, whatâs up, big D?â He asked, not making any move to sit up. Dream sighed, dropping his coat and uniform by the door and moving to sit on the arm of the couch opposite to Tommy. Heâd needed to have this conversation for a while. âOk, this is gonna be an awkward question, but I just have to ask it, if you donât mind.â Tommy heard the serious tone in Dreamâs voice and looked confused, before setting the phone down and moving to sit slightly more propped up, motioning for Dream to continue. He sighed. âOk, so, I know youâve been a shifter longer than me, soâŠhow did you deal with yourâŠinstincts?â
Tommy furrowed his eyebrows, not reacting for a few seconds. ââŠwhat?â âI mean,â Dream continued, trying to put into words what heâd been wondering for almost a month, âhow did you deal with having toâŠâ he pointed at his stomach. Tommyâs eyes widened a bit, before he switched to looking even more confused than before. âSame way you do? Yâknow, the only way to deal with itâŠ?â
At Dreamâs silence, Tommy continued. âI know other people, yâknow. I was pretty lucky to find someone who would put up with my weird shifter bullshit at a young age. Helps to know someone as weird as you.â At that Tommy went quiet for a second before trying to stifle laughter and pressing a bit harder on his stomach. âNo, he doesnât know you, does he?â Dream just stared as Tommy seemed to be listening in on what they were saying. He watched silently for a minute before he saw Tommyâs eyes go wide and his smile widened. âI think youâre right, itâs definitely time to change that.â He gave a couple more pats to his stomach before he sat up and moved his hand to press a bit lower than it had been pressing. Dream watched as he pressed in harder, almost tell by the look on his sonâs face that heâd gotten whoever the fuck out of his stomach and back into his esophagus. Tommy traced his way up calmly and motioned for Dream to come sit by him on the couch. Dream, having no idea what else to possible do in that situation, sat by Tommy, who was moving to cup his hands in front of his mouth.
âWhat. The. Fuck.â was all Dream could really say at that, which Tommy and the new borrower apparently found absolutely hilarious. They were both wheezing for air, and he swore he could see tears coming out of Tommyâs eyes. ButâŠthere was something off about the new borrower. It was almost like his laughter was fading in and out between human-sounding and animalistic. That wasâŠodd, to say the least, but no weirder than anything else that was going on.
âDream, Iâd like you to meet Tubbo.â Tommy said, holding and open palm out with the borrower, Tubbo apparently, standing on it with a hand extended. Dream took his hand between a few fingers and shook it lightly, retracting to wipe the residual spit off on his clothes after realizing that Tubbo was still absolutely soaked. âPleasure to meet you, bossman.â He thought he heard Tubbo say. His voice was kind of coming in and out like a radio trying to find a station through static, so he couldnât be too sure what heâd said.
âWhatâs up with your voiceâŠ?â Dream asked. ââŠ?â Tubbo looked confused for a minute before letting out a short squeak that Dream could guess was a âwhat.â âI mean, why are you kinda speaking and kinda making animal noises?â He tried to clarify, which apparently helped, because Tubbo seemed to just nod in understanding and point back up to Tommy. âHappens when you go too long without shifting.â the younger shifter explained, taking the hint Tubbo had given him. âYou can hear borrowers for a while after youâre small, but wait too long before shrinking again and they gradually start to sound like rodents.â That actually made sense to Dream. Heâs gone long enough that he hadnât been able to understand his smaller friends at all (heâd been extremely panicked before shrinking down to have Sapnap explain that one), but he never knew there was a middle ground between understanding them and not understanding them. âGreat, good that thatâs on my radar now, what fun.â Dream replied sarcastically, making Tommy laugh. Tubbo snapped his fingers, drawing attention back to himself before quickly climbing up Tommyâs are and hopping onto his shoulder, mumbling something Dream couldnât quite hear to Tommy. âRight, itâs all about you then, innit.â Tommy scoffed, at which Tubbo stuck a tongue out at him. Tommy revolted by leaning forward, making Tubbo yell in what Dream heard as a mix of squeaks and surprisingly colorful language for someone his age. And he thought the only 16 year old with a sailors mouth was Tommy, though who knows, maybe he picked it up from Tubbo. They seemed to beâŠreally close. Close enough that Tommy able to store him to satisfy whatever weird âpack instinctâ came from this, as Sapnap had explained. So, whoever this was classified as Tommyâs pack? To Tommyâs instincts, they were family? Hell, maybe to each other they were family. He wouldnât know. Seriously, where had this kid come from?
âSoâŠuh, how did you two meet?â Tommy paused in lifting Tubbo back onto his shoulder to look at Dream before leaning back onto the couch again, Tubbo firmly sat pressed up against his neck. âItâs a bit complicated, really, but Iâve known him for a while. Since I was, like, 5. Heâs about a half a year older than me, so it was pure luck that we met someone else our age.â â5?â Dream asked. âBut that was before-â âYeah, it was.â Tommy interrupted, and Dream shrunk back in on himself. He knew it was a touchy subject, but Tommy continued nonetheless. âIâŠwasnât a shifter yet. But I didnât care that it was weird to befriend someone smaller than my hand who I couldnât even understand. They were never home and Tubboâs parents had abandoned him at my old house, so we were pretty much all each other had. He became my best friend, practically my brother.â Tommy said, turning his head to look down at his apparent brother, who said something to the affect of âstop getting so sappyâ and âclingy,â making Tommy laugh with a half-hearted poke to the borrowerâs chest and a âfuck off man, I am not.â
âWhen I did become a shifter,â Tommy continued, âTubbo was my main support. I didnât have anyone else, besides you, really, and you were only able to see me so often at the group home. He helped me learn what it was like to be small. He taught me how to get around, to scavenge and whatnot. He came with me to every foster house and eventually, here.â He finished. âWait, Tubboâs lived here as long as we have?â Tommyâs pointed ears turned a bit pinkish and turned down, probably a sign of embarrassment. Dream mentally pat himself on the back that he was starting to get better with borrower body language but this wasnât the time to focus on that. âUhâŠyeah. He moved in with me when you bought this place.â
ââŠTommy that was 4 years ago.â âUh huh.â âAnd you never thought to mention a third roomate of any kind?â âNope.â Tommy said, popping the p. Dream put his head in his hands. âWhat am I gonna do with you.â
âHey, this isnât just on me! I told Tubbo he should meet you himself, he just never knew when to!â Tommy interjected, and Dream looked up to see Tubbo nodding. âEven before we knew you were a shifter, itâs not like we didnât trust you, itâd just been long enough that we assumed youâd met him by accident or something at that point.â Tommy explained frantically, while Tubbo continued nodding. ââŠOr that you would eventually. This mother fucker is the least subtle borrower youâve ever met.â Tommy finished while Tubbo only took his focus off of Dream for one second to punch the shoulder he was sitting on. Dream sighed. âWell, I guess I know him now. Itâs nice to meet you Tubbo, even if youâve kinda already known me for a while now, as weird as that is.â
Tubbo laughed, saying something that Dream couldnât quite make out before switching to hand signs, which honestly shocked Dream a bit. So borrowers couldnât read or write (heâd learned not to put Sapnap on any organizational jobs unless he could sort by color), but they knew sign language? Or Tubbo had taught himself after meeting Tommy. Yeah, thatâs probably make more sense. Dream shook his fist back and forth in what he was fairly positive was ânoâ in sign language. âSorry, I only know a little asl, iâm not sure what youâre saying.â Tubbo huffed and crossed his arms dramatically (Dream could guess that he picked that up from Tommy), looking up to his friend without saying a word. Somehow, Tommy seemed to get what he was saying.
âWe only know bsl, sorry. But weâd be happy to teach you! Weâre both fluent. Helps when youâre stuck at work and you wanna talk without people thinking youâre talking to yourself. Or, yâknow, you could just shrink and actually talk to him later.â âI can shrink and talk him him now?â Dream said. Tommy shrugged. âNah, heâs busy right now.â He said playfully as Tubbo apparently seemed to get the message and jumped backward off of Tommyâs shoulder. He didnât make it far, as Tommy turned and grabbed him before he could hit the couch, lifting him back up to his face. Tubbo screamed while laughing, a manic smile on his face as Dream watched Tommy open his mouth and lick him, Tubbo half-heartedly pushing the tongue away.
Dream huffed a laugh, standing to leave the couch as Tommy managed to finally stuff Tubbo back into his mouth, trying not to laugh as well. He seemed pretty distracted, so Dream made his way out of the room after a quick pat to his sonâs shoulder and a reminder to spit Tubbo out soon so Dream could order take-out or something as an actual meal. Tommy hummed a bit to show heâd heard before swallowing his friend back down. âGot it, big man.â he finally said after Tubbo had moved pst his windpipe. âMy instincts were still just a bit fucky. Iâll be good in like an hour. You think we can order chinese or something?â Dream actually laughed out loud at how casual the conversation became in just a second, as if this kid hadnât just swallowed someone alive. Tommy barely had a second thought about this, apparently. Though, Dream reasoned that he was probably the odd one out if it was such a casual thing for the other two apparent occupants. But he just smiled. âSure kid, I can order chinese.â he answered before ruffling Tommyâs hair before leaving the room, deciding he would deal with how normal this was all becoming another day.
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âWe were just getting to that young one, slow down so I can continue the storyâ the Elder chuckled, taking a deep breath before continuing the storyÂ
"Where the two gods had made their arrangement, sprouted an apple tree, where Yume and Akumu were founded, one side was cheerful, bright, yellow and warm, the other was miserable, dark, purple, these two sides of the tree made it easy for the two to protect and slowly a blossoming town was formed around the tree and our two guardiansâŠ" the elder paused, making sure none of the children would interrupt as they continued on
âthe tree only blooms once a year, but the twins have two flowers on their faces, one purple the other yellow, we're not fully sure what this means, but those flowers are part of the two, as if it means something to their relationship⊠the two started as two tiny fireballs that brought warmth or would make you freeze, but one way or another they were adorable~!âÂ
"The two twins aren't seen as family, despite their history, they are a combination of all good and evil, they're very close to each other, but it's believed they will have to sacrifice everything to continue anything elseâ the elder then stopped as the story was finished, the group of kids sat in front of them bombarding them with questions
"Why was there a war?!" "why are they here? Will they hurt us?!" "is Akumu badâŠ?" âShould we kill them both?!â
âcalm down kiddos, I can answer your questions next time, your parents are here to pick you up nowâ The elder smiled and waved as all the kids left with a parent one after another.
-art by me
Chapter 1
The Day the Soil is Corrupted
Yume's POV
âAkumu, I'm gonna go explore for a bit, okay?â I smiled seeing him nod, running off quickly âthank you! I'll get back before sunset!âÂ
I ran off into the forest before any villagers could see. 'I can't wait to see all the animals! I even brought some bread for the birds!' I giggled as I thought, running off into the field of flowers Akumu and I had found through previous exploration.Â
Not even ten minutes into making flower crowns, a few deers had joined me in relaxing in the field 'they seem to like it here too! I oddly actually like the quiet' I kept smiling, putting a flower crown onto a fawn sat next to her.Â
âYumeeee~â a dark voice spoke saying my name.
Â
"W-who's there?!" I yelled, scaring off my new deer friends as I turned around to try and find who the voice came from.Â
âI need you to walk forward, darling, you'll see me soonnn~â the voice spoke again, without even thinking properly Yume's body walked forward.Â
âI d-don't.. I don't know⊠okay⊠it's fineâŠâ Yume's let herself follow the voice, her positivity getting replaced by fear, her pace quickened seeing a gray figure behind some trees and bushes âum... Hello..?â Yume stuttered as she walked closer.Â
She felt herself relax seeing it was a statue, they had wings folded behind their back, a tail that was stuck in motion, they were sat with their legs crossed, horns on their head, they seemed to be in a suit with a few tears in it âhow have I never seen this before? It looks so oldâŠâ
âyou should touch it Yume~â  The voice suggested to her.Â
Without meaning to Yume found herself moving without meaning too âI don't want too!! I could damage it-!â the more negative she found herself, the faster she moved to it, falling into the statue as she attempted to catch herself on it, the statue shattered and black mist as well as a surge of negative energy surged out of it, swarming around Yume as soon as she could, Yume jumped up and sprinted back to the tree.Â
"Awe, I didn't even get to thank my lovely Daughterâ
Akumu's POV
â ïžTW, bullying, swearing, mentions of sexual assault and transphobia â ïž
"I'm gonna Go explore for a bit, okay?â Yume said, I simply nodded, as she ran saying she would be back before sunset or something, I just kept reading my book, She had gotten me a few books from the library the other day, the other two were more⊠illustrated then this one this one was about history.Â
'And as the people tried to steal an-' I got my book snatched from my hands âlook guys! The nerds reading a history book!â bunny laughed as she waved the book in the air to her friends âa history book?! She's Fucking nerd!â they laughed, all her friends surrounding me
"You think the she's learnt a thing or two from those books?â they were all talking to each other 'this is my chanceâŠ!' I thought to myself, about to run away and escape âwhere are you going, pretty boy~?â Susan spoke in a flirty tone âlet me go! Yume will be back soonâŠ!â I tried to speak "I think she should be taught a lesson~â another spoke up, undoing my shirt as I started to cryâŠÂ
After awhile they all left me, getting myself redressed I heard âyou know, eating the Apple could make all your pains go away~â a dark voice spoke to me, when I quickly shook my head and looked around âYume!! Where have you been?! Why do you look so panicked?!â I saw her run to me and hugged each other tightly.
the two best things i saw today on the news involved the creation of an lgbtq+ center and art (painting, poetry, music) for mental health sessions. it occurs to me, especially while reading a rather sad and painful ltm fic, that i find myself in need of at least one of these, if not both and therapy as well.
can i ever really help myself, though, if i cant bear the thought of telling ANYONE my past, certainly not someone i dont know and not someone i do know to the extent that i needâ im not making anyone my personal therapist and i know some would say they dont mind helping but thats not the point, of course i chose good friends but im not exploiting that, everâ even as i tell myself âwow, based off what everyone else says, their standards, my trauma is valid and actually really badâ when deep inside i feel like the truth doesnt match up with that statement. at the same time i wonder if id be looking for validation and support so much if i didnt need it, though its hard to tell whats going on with me a lot anyway so im not sure.
i just have this deep feeling right now that doesnt want to go away, and maybe i dont want it to either because right now a lot of things seem to be starting to make sense (reason 1 why im writing this) and, i dont know, maybe i want to believe i deserve help, but simultaneously im reprimanding myselfâ i went through the same thing my sisters did so why should i think this when they dont seem to be, at least not nearly as much as i do and not at this moment either. besides, ive had plenty of reconciliations and me time and encouragement and love from my best friend (and other friends, though they dont know all of my issues) so i should be better enough to deal with it until i can get away...it seems it doesnt work like that, so instead on and off i have bouts of wishing i felt the same type of despair i felt before, something i could bear and understand, rather than the new, differently-developed, more durable recovery-not-recovery, the looking for something, i dont know what, the every day feels a little wrong, the more times i hold back words the worse the recovery time is...and then the bouts of the worse pain like now, then bouts of feeling invulnerable, feeling renewal and reinvention.
except, through all of this, i need to remind myself that my situation, my experiences arent quite the same as my siblingsâ most likely because i often call out my mom on her shit (stupidly, believe me, a moronic move and i know it every time) and so i get the brunt of her anger. i have to remind myself constantly not to do this, though each time i have hope that maybe, perhaps i was wrong before and i just didnt see the truth, maybe the person who never seems to learn is willing and i just want someone to blame (for what? why would i want someone to blame if nothing had happened, as this theory indicates), or maybe my mom can change, maybe i can forgive her and we can end this...it doesnt work that way though, nothing is forgiven, she doesnt care, not the way that matters and really not at all (i can elaborate later). mainly, i have to remind myself not to start a fight because its not just me taking the fall, its my sisters too. again, stupidly, i do it sometimes anyway. most of the time i say things by which i mean no harm and it turns into a yelling scene, no yelling on my part though, and i think i should have expected it. far more often im not sure what i could have done differently in my situation, which says a lot (possibly only that im not thinking enough some days) because im not one to forgive anyone so easily. in any case, my sisters dislike me for causing so much trouble and of course i quite dislike myself for it too but sometimes when the urge to throttle oneself arises, things simply must be said, not that that actually absolves me of the scenes ive made.
anyhow. i have more to say on these subjects, as iâve lived them for what seems so long to me, given that its my life, but i suppose that can wait for another day.
sweat dripped down your face as you panted. as your vision slowly adjusted to the semi-darkness of the room, you recognized the glow in the dark stars on Jolyneâs bedroom ceiling. you had smiled when you first saw them, but now they only brought tears to your eyes as you remembered what your dream world had so cruelly showed you.
the vision, replaying over and over again like a bad vhs, and overlapping your vision with only small pauses between replays, made your entire body violently shiver, despite the warmth emanating from the quilt and the body lying beside you.
oh right. the body beside you.
that was jolyne, wasnt it? andâif she was warm then that meantâshe had to be alive.... right? you needed to see her calm and beautiful face, needed to feel her chest rise up and down in your arms, needed to hear her voice as she reassured you that she was fine, but you couldnât move.
it felt like you were frozen in fear. the fear that you would turn around and be met with a sea of bloody water and a limp corpse lying in your arms, just as you had dreamed of night and night again.
caught up in your panic, you didnât notice jolyne shuffling next to you until her face appeared above yours and her arm grabbed your shoulder, warm and lively as ever.
âhey! hey, y/n, are you alright?? youâre hyperventilating, I need you to slow your breathing, babe. in and out, yeah?â
she started taking deep, audible breaths for your copy, repeating her directions and occasionally telling you that everything was okay.
once your breathing returns to a some-what normal pattern, jolynes gentle voice urges more tears to fall down your face.
âyou-youâre alive, jolyne-you-I-I had the worst fucking dream and you-â
âshhhhhh, shhhâ
jolyne patted your hair and pulled you to her shoulder
âyouâre okay, y/n, and Iâm okay. Iâm right here, darling, it was just a dream, okay?â
you nodded into her shoulder
ââm sorry for getting your t-shirt wetâ
the both of you gave wet chuckles.
âI donât give a shit about my t-shirt, just you, sweet-cheeksâ
you made a noise halfway between groaning at the pet name and whining at how sweet she was with you.
ây-youâre not going anywhere, right? I mean you-you do a lot of reckless shit, jolyneââ
jolyne pulled you away from her clavicle and gently squished your face between her hands.
âbaby. I promise you I would never do anything that would separate us like that. I love you too much to go around fighting any more lunatic priests and losing time that I could be spending with you in my armsâ
a couple more tears rolled down your cheeks at her tenderness. you brought your own hand to her jaw and pulled her into a sweet, salty kiss.
when you pulled away, jolyne was smiling like an idiot.
âcan we cuddle tonight, baby?â
âhave I ever said no to that??â
âthankfully, no.â
jolyne pulled you into her chest as she lay down, your arms going around each otherâs torsos and your face into her neck again. you relished the scent of her shampoo and the way her breath softly blew your hair.
although you would have to untangle yourselves in the morning, for the moment nothing else existed in the world but you and jolyne. and who would ever ask for more?
