#moonboundseries

You don't love yourself like he used to love you.

That feast was the last time you saw Jason Todd alive. After that, any further information regarding him got more and more worrisome. Eventually, your hands would start shaking before you could fully open a single letter with the Wayne's bat seal on the envelope, all messages written by your friend, Cassandra.

"Jason's gone. I hope Jason's just being Jason and he'll come back when he takes some time to himself."

"It has been confirmed that the Jester kidnapped Jason, tricked him somehow. He's taunting us. Apparently he's in a horrible shape. We got sent a patch of his hair. I don't know what to do. Father is loosing his mind trying to find him. He doesn't really speak as of late, he just...exists."

You thought of him everyday. Worrying sick. Praying to Lady Luna to bring him back in one piece, begging for his safe return.

It's like your body knew before you did, though. Whenever you'd think of him and where he might be, a tight knot of fear and grief would tangle up in your stomach. Tears would force themselves into your eyes and you head would start spinning.

One letter caused you to become a shell of yourself for two weeks.

"We found him. His body was unrecognizable. He only got identified later. My brave brother held out for two months out there, you know? I knew he'd fight. I'm so angry. Why couldn't he fight for a bit longer?"

"The funeral is in five days. You should make it in time. He'd want you to be there."

You mourned differently than you did after your mother's death. Your mom was ill. Everybody knew what would happen and when it would happen. You and your father were there for the last days of her life, helping her walk to the gardens and reading her favorite books to her. Making her smile. She wasn't in pain, being given the proper medicine. You got to say goodbye. She passed away at peace, surrounded by her loved ones.

Jason didn't. He died violent, young, and scared. Completely alone. He was tortured for two months, beaten and brutally executed. After the most shattering grief you've ever experienced, another type of sorrow came. Because he was alive again. Just not as himself anymore.

"Jay's back. I don't know exactly how it happened yet. Something about Thalia and The Lazarus Pit. She ressurected him. He's not the same though. That's not my brother. He looks like Jason, but he doesn't at the same time. He looks at me wrong."

"Thalia explained he'd be angry for a bit. They call it the Pit Madness. It's supposed to be temporary. He has nightmares every single night. Wakes up screaming. Snaps at us for the tiniest things."

"I find myself afraid of him."

"Jason broke Tim's nose today."

"He attacked some noble guy during a banquet. Because he was wearing a violet suit. He must've thought it was the Jester guy. He had to be restrained by four men."

Each update was more heartbreaking than the last. At that point, you wanted to ask Cassandra to stop sending you anything regarding Jason, but you couldn't. Cassandra needed someone other than her family to talk to. You knew her heart was heavy too. Inside you, there was still that glimmer of hope that maybe one day she'll say something good. That he had joined them for dinner. That he hadn't woken up screaming. Dick sent you a letter himself, begging you to come. He asked you to at least try to talk to Jay. So you did, travelling on horseback.

You ended up never seeing him again. He wouldn't allow it. You were thrown out of the part of the castle where his sleeping chambers were. He refused to talk to you, or even see you.

"I don't understand, we used to be close friends. I care about him. Tell him that."

You insisted to the guards standing before you. They both seemed like they wanted to let you in, their faces sour. Orders were orders. Perhaps they feared Jason's wrath, or that you'd be the next victim of it.

"The Prince won't see you, Your Highness. We apologize, but we were asked to escort you back."

"Just five minutes, please. I didn't ride three days here to be thrown out the door. I want to see him."

"....We apologize, Your Highness. He's set on not having to see you."

Your poor heart cracked.

Your last memory is of him as he said his farewells to you after that dumb feast, before everything went down, by kissing your whole face and making you giggle when nobody was around. Now it was as if you had never existed.

You don't know if he's still remotely close to the Jason you used to know. The sweet boy with a boyish smile and unruly raven hair, who'd insist he'll marry you when you two come of age. The boy who would drag you to the library at night when you were teenagers, to giggle at the poorly drawn sex positions on the pages. The boy who held your broken form the whole night after your mother's funeral.

You're pretty sure you don't know him anymore. Even if years later, Cassandra insists that he made progress and they're on good terms now. It's still not the same. He doesn't love you anymore. That love must've died with him and The Lazarus Pit didn't bother to bring it back. He hasn't written, hasn't invited you to visit. Tears sting your eyes and you curl up into a ball.

Everything was so perfect before that stupid criminal ripped him from you. The worst is, you can't blame him for how he's become.

His body was unrecognizable.

How could someone hurt your sweet boy like that? The one who'd shyly pick flowers for you when you were kids, because his father told him that girls like flowers. The one who'd panic whenever you fell during sparing. How could anyone torture him for weeks until he got executed? In what world would he deserve that?

He was gone, and it was time to move on. That's what you thought for the past few years.

So why in bloody hell did he agree to send you the betrothal offer?

You've been fighting your servants and demanding sleep for the past hour. Their constant walking and begging for you to get up was turning greatly annoying, considering you haven't been sleeping well. It's been a week since the court's meeting, nothing is done and the full moon (your period) is approaching. Sleep should be on top of the to-do list. The well-being of the princess should be your servants's priority, but nooo they just had to wake you every fifteen minutes.

The meek voice of your handmaiden is replaced by loud footsteps that go straight to your window.

,,It's time to wake up, spoiled brat." Your sorcery teacher, magic advisor and (unfortunately) your best friend spats, opening the curtains. You groan and hide your face in the pillow when the sun hits you. Your eyes feel dry and your muscles feel weak.

"Zatanna, fuck off."

"Stop whining, get your ass up. Or I'll levitate it to the bath chambers." She scoffs.

"Not a bad idea." You mumble. You swear you can feel the remnants of dried drool on your pillow.

"Princess, seriously. You have only two hours until the meeting. Why are you so unbothered?" She asks, yanking your sheets off. You curl up, missing the warmth.

"What meeting?" Curiosity's peaked, but you don't have a fuck to give yet.

"With Prince Orm Marius?!" Her voice rings in your ears and your eyes shot open. White panic shoots through your body and you stumble out of the bed. She steadies you by the shoulders as black dots dance in your vision.

"That's today?!"

"Oh, now you're awake!" She's the one to groan now. In comparison to you, she's the picture of a morning bird, fully clothed, smelling nice and her hair is nicely done. She guides you to walk to the bath chambers, reciting backwards incantations. You're trying to decipher them, but before you can, a towel flies into your arms. Your poor handmaiden is already finished drawing a bath. She helps you undress quickly, as Zatanna rummages through the dresses your ladies-in-waiting prepared. Someone knocks. "Not now." Zatanna calls out.

"I wish to inform that King Cassius is waiting for the princess in the great hall." Your knight says. Your muscles tense, despite sinking into warm water.

"Will you bother to mention that the Princess still has an hour to meet him there, or do you wish to make her panic, Harper?" You can hear the man snicker.

"You're going on dungeon duty for this." You hiss out loudly enough for him to hear. "Gonna think twice about your words when you sit in that cold, damp rat palace!"

"Hey, that's not fair!" He whines. "I deserve many things, but not the prison of eternal stench."

"Go bother someone else, Roy. Don't you have a kid to take care of anyway?" Zatanna asks, showing you a red dress. You shake your head no. A meeting with a potential suitor isn't the time for anything of this color. God forbid he's gonna think you want to have sex with him already, wearing a seductive dress. Getting laid would be nice, especially that you couldn't remember your last orgasm, but that's not something to do with a thirty year old man courting you.

"She has a mother too, thank you very much. Someone has to bring the bread home and protect our pretty princess!" The nickname makes you feel bitter. Jason was the one to make it up and Roy picked it up from him, back when he was still a fresh knight in Gotham. Back when he still turned to suspicious substances to feel okay.

Lian was an accident. An unexpected blessing right after Roy found out what happened to his best friend. Perhaps that's what saved him. Being away from Gotham and having his whole world wrapped up into one babygirl. He had a purpose that prevented him from drowning himself in grief.

The thought of what could've happened to him while grieving alone caused you to have a knot in your throat. You would've had to attend two funerals in the span of a month.

"Earth to my princess." The sorceress says, showing you a light blue dress. "You think this will impress the fish man?" She wiggles her eyebrows.

"You're not funny." A glare meets her eyes. You've spoken at the wrong time, because your handmaid pours water over you head that very second. "Do not. Say. A word."

"You look like a wet dog."

"I told you to shut up." You groan, but relax a bit as soap is massaged into your scalp. "I'll take the blue dress."

"Good choice. This one shows off your curves." She says. Your brows furrow, the image of how you look in it clear in your head.

In The Kingdom of Lunaris, curvy women are the standard. The statue of Lady Luna right in front of the castle is accurate to the Goddess, who was unapologetic about her figure. Most women here are. Childbearing hips were sought after, thick thighs, as well as strong arms and a belly pudge to protect the womb. How was a woman supposed to survive the cold without the extra fat keeping her warm? Lunaris is cold. It's winters can be harsh. And how is she supposed to sync with the moon's cycle if her own is gone due to malnutriton?

You're not ignorant enough as to assume the standard is the same everywhere in the world.

"What do those fish women look like? I've never been to Atlantis." You mumble.

"You're getting worked up over if fish man will find you attractive?" She asks, bewildered.

"He's a suitor. It'd be good if he thought of me as such."

"Princess." Zatanna says firmly. "If you were a stick, he'd start wondering if we have enough food in the castle and if you're still fertile or not."

"Whatever." You rest your cheek on your knee.

"Don't whatever me."

You're dried off, clothed in the ice blue dress that hugs you just right, your hair is made and you look royally dolled up. You don't eat, because the clock's ticking and quite frankly, it's not breakfast time anymore. Your stomach growls a bit when you catch the whiff of food being cooked. They're preparing a huge dinner for today.

Something smells like seafood. Fuck, are they making fish? What if that's the equivalent cannibalism for Orm and his people? You've done your research about Atlantis when you were younger, but you never stopped to think about their eating habits.

You're trying to convince yourself that the cooks would be thoughtful enough to think of some Lunarian dish to make instead.

You rehearse in your head what to say. How to greet him politely. Your back straightens and your chin goes just a tad higher. The great hall's door opens.

There they are. Two guards in the front, two guards in the back. The signature Atlantean armour on them, their faces stone cold and unwavering. The Prince is walking with a trident in one hand, a little boy's hand in the other. There's no lavish gold or riches in sight. No heavy crown, no armour on the Prince himself.

He's not how you remember him. He's older, more stoic. His eyes are soft when he looks at you. They're not hungry, they don't roam. The dark blue or his irises dips into violet. He's not towering over you as he approaches, despite his large size.

"Princess." He says softly.

"Prince Orm." You respond. You didn't mean to sound so eager.

He extends a hand and you give him yours. He's gentle. Barely touches you, as if he's afraid of breaking you. He presses a kiss to the back of your hand. It's quick, but not rushed. He doesn't force you to keep eye contact when he lets go, it shifts it to your father. You're thankful, because your cheeks are already flushed.

"It's quite the pleasure to meet you two. I'm very fond of visiting The Kingdom of Lunaris, it's an honor to dine with it's rulers."

He's genuine. Extends his hand to your father next.

"It is a delight to have you here, Prince Orm. I believe we've never had a proper conversation during any of the banquets." Your father smiles as they firmly shake hands.

You notice Thomas eyeing you curiously. Your lips twitch into a smile that you can't control, no matter how mature you want to seem. Orm and your dad gush to eachother a little, fighting on who's more happy to have this meeting. You turn your attention to the boy.

"You must be Prince Thomas?" You ask the him, leaning a bit and resting your hands on your knees. "I've heard you're a smart little guy." You haven't heard shit, but it's polite to say and he has the most adorable, big violet eyes in the world. A spitting image of his daddy.

"I'm Tommy." He finally smiles a bit. "You're very pretty." He mumbles out, looking at the floor. He's so shy. Your heart twists. You're not a mother but if you've ever felt maternal instincts, it's now.

"Thank you, polite young man. I'm quite sure you'll grow up to be as handsome as your father too." You give him a warm smile. He lets go of Orm's hand and makes a grabby gesture towards yours. Warmth shoots through your ribs. You take it gently, and straighten up, now walking with him by your hand as a servant leads all of you to the dining room. Tommy marches proudly by your side, clearly happy that the pretty lady is giving him attention.

You can feel Orm's gaze on your back. It doesn't feel threatening though. You have a hunch he heard your comment about him being handsome.

You all sit at the long dining table, and Tommy makes a pouty face when he has to let go of your hand. A wave of relief washes over you when you see Lunarian cousine serves on the table.

"It brings me great joy that you've started considering me as a potential match."

Orm's smile is warm. It doesn't quite reach his eyes, but the corners of them crinkle a little. You gather your courage to speak openly. Your father can't be your voice forever.

"We're looking for a union with someone who has the same political views. As you know, we're not very happy with what Lord Protector of Metropolis is doing."

Your palms are sweating. He's so manly. You avert you gaze a little, not to stare at his biceps. God, you seriously need to get laid somehow. You want to bite them.

"I'm well aware of your stance on what Lex Luthor is doing. I can imagine our alliance with Metropolis must be quite worrisome for you." His smile fades, his expression turning serious. He doesn't look away from when he continues. "My brother, Arthur, is the ruler of Atlantis. I have no say in the matter of his friendship with Lex. I can only tell you that if it were up to me, Atlantis would have already cut off their trade with Metropolis. The Lord Protector isn't our friend. He's a threat to us, just like he is to other nations."

Your heart feels lighter. Your father nods and hums in agreement. He speaks up.

"Troops from Metropolis have been banging at our door for some time now. Under the excuse of trade or spreading the word of The Lord Protector's greatness. Then again, if they come in peace, why do they come armed?" He explains. It's true. You get reports about it a few times a week, as the poor knights ask you what to do. You can't hurt Lex's soldiers, because it could be considered a reason for Metropolis to attack you. Backing them off has been an issue for some time now.

"It's turning into a disturbing cult." Prince Orm grumbles. "If we do, marry, Princess. I'll be happy to support your choices regarding any potential war. If Lunaris, Gotham, Themiscyra and eventually, my brother go against Metropolis together, I'm sure we shall succeed and overthrow the dictator." He says it firmly, like he's carefully thought it through.

"We're not going to initiate a war, unless it's necessary." You say. ,,We're doing what we can to be a peaceful Kingdom. No need to loose people over it's ruler's disputes."

"Very well, my Princess." He smiles a bit at you again. He looks content with your words. Not amused, more impressed. "I trust your choice."

The dinner is surprisingly pleasant. Your father and Orm get along well. Tommy's allowed to chime in despite his age, often saying something cute, or asking a question. Orm is patient with him, answers everything and praises the boy when he understands something complicated. The food is great, as it always is and by the end of dessert, Orm turns to you.

"Would you perhaps walk me through the gardens, princess?" He asks. ,,With a chaperone, of course."

"Yes, of course." You're taken by surprise. He just gives you a reassuring smile. Tommy tugs on his sleeve.

"Daddy can I come too?" He pleads.

"Only if the pretty lady allows it." Your heart flutters.

"You can come with us, sweet boy." You say.

Your father stays at the castle, most likely entertained by the guards. He had a habit of talking to foreign soldiers and making conversation about his own time as a royal knight. He always ends up making them forget that they're speaking to a King.

You get up. Tommy runs up to you and takes your hand before you can register it. Orm walks by his son's side. Not too close, but not too far from you. You lead them to the gardens and a chaperone is deployed somewhere behind you, though she makes sure not to get too close. You show them the garden, full of old statues, marble architecture and greenery. It's undoubtedly the most beautiful part of the castle's grounds. Wind is gradually turning colder with the last months. Winter is coming soon, but for now, the sun is still here, casting a warm glow over everything.

"May I speak freely?" The Prince asks after a while, when the woman watching you is far enough to see you, but not to hear you.

"Yes, you may." Being asked for permission by a man almost ten years your senior is a strange feeling.

"I know you might be a bit uncomfortable with my age."

"It's not like tha-"

"It's alright, princess, I understand. I'm not offended." He chuckled softly. "I didn't send you the marriage offer because I'm a predator who's preying on young women. Oceans, no." He doesn't have a stick shoved up his ass. Good to know.

"Isn't that what a predator would say?" You allow yourself to joke.

"Princess, I may be a man, but I am not a liar." He rolls his eyes. "There's no right way to word it. I wanted to say my intentions are pure."

"Good point."

,,Look! A birdie!" Tommy suddenly beams, pointing at a bird. It's reddish belly catches in your vision. It's a robin. Must everything remind you of Jason? It's like he cursed you on purpose. Tommy runs in front of you, but not close enough to scare the bird. He crouches down and observes it. Orm joins him and takes time to explain to him what a robin is.

You observe them for a moment. Orm isn't a politician, or a Prince right now. He's a dad. He stands up and lets his son walk around to see all of the statues. He comes back to you.

,,I'm sure you know my past. What I've been through." He begins. ,,My wish now is to simply have someone by my side. Someone to love and cherish. I want Thomas to grow up with a mother figure. A woman capable of loving a child that's not hers. That's why I brought him here with me. If you decide I'm the right one, he's coming too."

,,I get it." You say quietly.

,,You don't have to make your decision now, or tell me anything." He says, gazing at you with a hint of admiration. He brushes a stray hair behind your ear. His thumb lingers on your cheek. His gaze flickers to your lips for a mere second that you barely catch. ,,If you choose another, I'll honor your decision. I won't hold it against you."

You're about to speak, but he's faster once again.

,,You'd be perfect for me though." He almost whispers and his hand falls back.

gotta admit i kinda wanna write sex with orm just to feed you some smut