2 unrelated questions:
Any advice for a person who is on a process of coming out (gay identity)?
How do I navigate social anxiety disorder?
Bit context:
- Realized that im most likely gay
- im 27 - no prior experience of sex, dating or relationships (i would want to but my anxiety makes dating & friendships in general hard)
- backage from past: school bullying & emotional neglect from parents = depression & mainly severe social anxiety disorder
- social anxiety isnt really related to being gay but to mostly negative experiences about ppl in general > being gay kinda is neutral or even positive thing for me in my mind but my anxiety disorder and negative self image skews my interpretation about things (for example anxiety about sex or other men)
- i guess the worst fear of mine is being bullied again
- social anxiety translates also to self-esteem & body image issues (i dont find myself attractive which is not entirely true i guess since for shits & giggles I made an account to an gay dating app and got couple likes in the 1st day - not planning to meet anyone though)
- i guess the best avenue for me would be to get a therapist which im currently doing but the waiting lists are long & i kinda need help now. Ive wasted enough time already.
i am so sorry i have no idea how long this has been sitting in the inbox, but i do have some things to say about this. i have a severe, debilitating anxiety disorder. it sucks. it is so bad. it has made so many social experiences so, so, SO BAD. dating for me has only ever worked out in situations which started like ldr/online dating. this might be something you can look into! the avenue of text, for me, helps my anxiety because i can revise what i'm saying as i go. i can also take my time interpreting messages longer (i'm nd as well so sometimes it's hard to register things and it takes longer to process and respond). it's likely you'll need to develop a close bond before you feel safe enough to pursue somebody romantically - joining discord servers or facebook groups relevant to the things you like and posting/messaging people from within them to make friends will be a good start. the fun thing about mean people on the internet is that it's really easy to get rid of them. you owe nobody anything on the internet - block people as needed. knowing this has helped me not be *as* scared of interacting online. i hope you are in therapy now, or that therapy comes soon, because the right therapist is such a relief on this stuff. -mod med
