#mmungbean

Mona had been rushing all day. She was almost late for classes, and had a lot of assignments she needed to finish. But for the first time in a long while, she could say that she was actually caught up with herself. The last of her remediations were in, and she had barely had any other homework due to it only being the start of classes. After classes, she had rushed to her dorm to touch up her hair and grab the white wicker picnic basket she'd prepared for she and Finn the night before. Now, after a pleasant bus ride next to the boy she liked, everything began to sink in. Their ride pulled up in front of a mini golf course on the edges of Seattle, where she'd made reservations for two to play and eat lunch. "Are you game?" she asked, grinning up at him as they stepped onto the course.

Finn was late to his first class today and had some unfortunate run-ins that he did not expect to happen, but he endured through the day because he knew that once it was all over, it was time to finally go on his first date with Mona. He spent more time than he needed to trying to perfect his hair as though how successful the date would go relied on his hair, and he kept stopping at each reflection to fix his hair until he finally saw Mona. Then all his attention went to her, asking her how her day was a trying to get a peak inside the picnic basket she brought throughout the entire bus ride to the mini golf course. "I am so game that I basically am the game," he replied back to her. He asked back, "The real question is are you ready to lose?"

Mona made a face at him, shaking her head a bit. "No way, I've already devised a serious system of game play," she began to explain with a smile. "If I win, then its because of my hidden athletic powers--if you win, I will say it is because obviously we are not actually competing and that it is not about winning or losing, its about spending time with me, who is very very cute!" She skipped in circles around him, grinning cheekily.

Finn put his hands on his hips and stood there while Mona skipped circles around him. "That's a very clever plan you've devised right there," he admitted. "Very, very cute, but still very clever. I guess that means I should devise a serious system of game play of my own which may, or may not, involve sabotage..."

Mona stopped skipping abruptly in front of him, putting her hands on her hips as well. "sabotage!? Cheaters don't get fed!" she scoffed loftily, hugging her picnic basket as she stalked off to get them checked in. She asked for two putters and golf balls, getting pink for herself and choosing red for him. "Remember this color," she said, holding the ball up to him. "This is going to be the ball that beats you fair and square!"

Finn followed Mona through the entrance, laughing to himself over how competitive they were getting. He held onto his putter and red ball, and then looked at hers when she directed attention to it. "That ball's round, Mona. You're already halfway there to losing," he said as he swung his putter back and forth while walking towards the first hole.

Mona blinked, confused as she trotted after him. "What's wrong with a round ball? Isn't that how balls are supposed to be?" she made a face, actually unsure of herself for some reason.

Finn: "It was a joke," Finn paused, then continued to explain himself. "Because you said 'fair and square,' but the ball is a sphere, and not a square..."

Mona reddened for not having gotten that. She nodded awkwardly, trying to laugh it off. Hiding her face, she stepped ahead of him toward the hole. "My bad! I should pay more attention . . ." clearing her throat, she added, "do you know how to golf? OR do I have to school you for that too?"

Finn laughed, "It was a /bad/ joke, don't worry." He half expected her to make fun of him for making such a bad joke like she's done previously, but now he just felt bad for making it in the first place. Finn waited off to the side for Mona to go first. "I've gone to the course with my dad when I was younger, but I was more of just the caddy back then," he shrugged his shoulders. "You play golf? Is this where your hidden athletic powers come from?"

Mona laughed, shaking her head a little. "I've only played once at the pastor's summer carnival," she said, shrugging a bit. She paused, wiggling her hips as she got into a stance to put the ball. As it rolled on, she continued, "Did you wear those white people pants? With all the argyle? Baby Finn dressed like an old man?" she taunted. In the Seattle fog, she had to squint to see her ball stop about six feet from the hole, having rolled right past it to the opposite end of the four-way ramp.

Finn continued to swing his putter back and forth as he watched Mona begin her first swing. "So you really are hiding some experience up your sleeve," he laughed. Once she hit it, he leaned to his side to listen if he could hear her ball fall into the hole. When he didn't and could see that he ball rolled away, Finn stepped up to the start and placed his red ball down. Before he swung, he said, "Just so you know, baby Finn also wore one of those hats with the balls on top and it was really cute and adorable." He hit the ball and it rolled right past the hole and to the far edge of the course.

Mona smirked to herself, picking up her basket and walking toward the ball with her nose in the air. "I'm sure it was darling--but it only distracted from how bad your game is," she teased. She set the basket down again and got ready to hit. "If I win, can I get a picture of that, though? the only thing cuter than you is probably baby you."

Finn walked towards where his ball stopped, avoiding the area between where Mona and the hole was so he wouldn't get hit if she decided to go already. "I'm flattered, but you're asking for a lot if you win," he looked down at where his ball landed and tried to think of how he was going to hit it away from the border. "If I win, I want another one of those root beer flavored chap sticks."

Mona watched as her ball missed the hole by two inches. She groaned, stamping her feet. "So close!" She turned and pouted to him. "I'm realizing now my game isn't good, and winning at all is a lot to ask," she laughed shyly. "buuut if you do win, I think I have better ways of sharing that chapstick with you!" she said sneakily, walking past him toward the edge of the course to let him do his turn.

Finn aimed his putter perfectly to get the red ball away from the edge and got ready to swing, but as soon as she said what he thought she was implying, he swung and missed the ball completely, instead hitting the small wall and dropping his putter to the ground. He embarrassingly bent down to pick it up, and then looked directly back at Mona with a tight smile. Shaking his head, he muttered the word, "Sabotage."

Mona let her mouth drop in fake surprise. she put her hand to her chest for effect and blinked innocently. "I don't know what you're talking about, Finny Finn!" she said, a smirk slowly forming. "I'm just trying to find ways we could /both/ win!" As cute and flattering as it was that she'd caught him off guard, she thought she'd at least do him the courtesy of walking over, picking up his putter, and handing it back to him--looking directly up at him with a cheeky smile.

Finn took his putter from Mona and jokingly shook a fist at her. "You're using me, woman," he laughed before getting ready to swing again. He slowly swung his putter back and forth just before the ball as he focused on actually hitting it this time, and then he hit it. The ball started rolling and came crashing into Mona's pink ball, forcing Mona's pink ball to roll away more than two inches away from the hole now. Finn stared at the golf balls for a moment with wide eyes, unexpecting that to happen, but when he looked back at Mona to apologize, the smile growing on his face suggested other wise. He told her, "I swear, I did not mean for that to happen."

Mona 's eyes widened at him, at a loss for words. As she walked over to the ball, she raised her putter and pretended to swat him with it (not actually hitting him) then strided over to her own ball. She got into position and gave it as gentle of a put as possible--a wild smile appearing on her face as she actually made it in. Mona jumped up and down eagerly, turning to smile at Finn and momentarily forgetting their competition. "Did you see that!?"

Finn watched as she hit it and was just as surprised as she was when it made it in. "Yooooo," he smiled back at her widely, raising his hand for a high-five. Excited, he asked her, "How did you do that?"

Mona retrieved her ball then went to high five Finn. "I don't know!" she said, glancing back at the hole. "But I think this means I'm winning now--prepare your baby photos!" she laughed. With her putter, she tapped his butt. "Finish this round please--if you can manage."

Finn pointed his putter at Mona and dramatically said, "You will never touch my baby photos!" He continued his round, needing two more hits before actually getting his red ball into the hole. Reaching down to pick up his ball, he proudly smiled, "That was really good, did you see that?" before going back to pick up her picnic basket and charging to the next course.

Mona gave him a dainty clap and a respectful nod. "very good, sir," she appeased. "It seems your baby photos are safe for now!" As they walked toward the next hole, they passed over a small wooden bridge. Mona noted small water droplets speckling the wood, then glanced up at him--and the sky, thanks to his height. "Is it drizzling?" she hedged, holding her hand out to feel.

Finn stopped at Mona's question and looked up, then looked at his hand as he also held it out to feel. "It looks more like a small sprinkle," he said, then looked back at Mona. "Are you willfully withdrawing from the games because of the weather?"

Mona narrowed her eyes at him for a moment, then shook her head stubbornly. "I still plan to play, I was just asking," she said coolly. Still, despite her tone, she took advantage of his hand being out and pressed her palm to it. Mona continued to hold his hand until they reached the next hole, only letting go to give her put. As she got ready, she adjusted the red sweater she'd chosen for the day--it was one of his, one that he had thrown into her pile the other day as they did laundry. It was very comfortable and thankfully warm on this cold day, given she'd only worn a white tennis skirt beneath. Once she was adjusted, she put the ball, gasping as a wind swept it two feet to the left off course.

Finn smiled at her response, happy that they were going to continue and not just end it right there. He walked with her and stood off to the side, while holding the picnic basket, to let her go first and watch her play in his red sweater. The breeze that came by was strong enough to make her skirt lift just enough for him to see something, but he was too distracted by how far away her golf ball flew to see anything. He looked back at Mona, then where he ball went, and then back at Mona. Then he went up to her and hit her feet with his putter, "Alright, move aside! This is my chance to get points now."

Mona shifted to the side, hugging her putter and pouting as she watched his turn. She admire the way his shoulders squared themselves as he prepared to play. He was just about to swing when she stepped closer to him. "Good luck! Remember my chapstick!" she whispered, grinning as she saw his elbow twitch.

Finn heard her whisper and the moment he pulled his arms back to prepare to hit the ball, his putter went flying backwards behind him and almost hitting her. His putter hit the wooden bridge they walked on earlier and fell into the small river that it was suspended over. "Oh my God, stop that!" Finn turned around to yell at her, playfully shaking her by the shoulders.

Mona grinned, her eyes crinkling even as he jokingly shook her. "I'm not doing anything!" she laughed, flapping her arms like she had on that first night--partially because his shaking flustered her, and partially because she was cold. Pulling herself away, she skipped to go get his putter. As she came up to hand it to him, she admonished, "you should really have better focus, Finn. So easily distracted by a simple girl!"

Finn took his putter from her and thanked her for getting it for him. "I could try, but you, Mona, are not a simply girl," Finn said as he prepared himself to give another try. He stared at the hole for a moment, trying to calculate the power of the swing he should do this time, and then finally hit the ball, getting it to hit a wall and roll away so it was less than a foot away from the hole. Finn didn't want them to stay on this course for too long since Mona wasn't even playing this round, so he focused as much as he could to quickly end it. He went up to the red ball and hit it just gently enough to get it in. Without giving time to celebrate his own win, he took picked up his ball and went over to where Mona's landed off course. "Alright, next hole!" Finn announced as he found Mona's ball and held it up in the air for her to see.

Mona grinned a bit, skipping over to him--almost slipping as the thin grass got more slippery from the mist. Her face was red as she smoothed her skirt down and took the ball from him. "You go first, since you did better," she instructed, tapping his bottom with her putter again before heading off to the side with their basket. "this not-simple girl will try and keep her mouth shut this time!" she promised. As he got ready to put, she took in the surroundings a little more: the quaint, miniature buildings, the perfectly trimmed greenery. She also noted how few people were on the course, especially as the rain picked up just a bit more every minute.

Finn went to the start of the next course. Thanks to the thicker jacket he was wearing, he couldn't feel how cold it was getting as the clouds were becoming more gray above them. Finn set his ball down and held on to his putter with both hands as he got ready to swing. Even though he was acting annoyed of Mona distracting him in the past rounds, it would be a lie if he said he didn't want her to. He looked over his shoulder to look at Mona to see if she was looking at him, and then he looked back at the ball and kicked it with his foot instead of his putter.

Mona: always easy to react or be startled, Mona's eyes went wide at his actions. She pointed needlessly and laughed. "Cheater! That's cheating--what's the penalty!?" she asked, running towards him (her steps ginger in the wet). She took her putter and hit him on the butt again.

Finn held his hands up in the air, dropping his putter on the ground. He was smiling smugly, feeling more proud about getting caught than ashamed about breaking the rules. He asked Mona, "I don't know, what should my penalty be?"

Mona tapped her chin as she thought. It seemed almost too enjoyable for Finn to get in trouble at times, but it was a mischievous she both identified with and wanted to humor. Her face lit up when she finally got her idea. "Piggy back! To the next course!" she declared, already handing him her basket and bitter and stepping behind him. "We will assume I won this round, because you are a cheater." She kicked the back of his shoe lightly, indicating he should bend so she could climb atop his back.

Finn laughed as he took the basket from her. "Alright, that makes us 2-1 now, right?" He rolled up his sleeves and then slightly bent his knees so that she can hop on his back.

Mona climbed up with a smile, hugging his neck and shoulders loosely. It was only then that she realized how damp their clothes had gotten. Cupping her hand over her eyes, she looked for the next hole. "Yes, 2-1! And don't you forget who's winning!" she said warningly. As they trotted over, she gave him a squeeze. "don't slip, please!" she advised before resting her chin on his shoulder.

Finn made his way to the next hole as soon as she was on his back and she felt secure enough to not fall enough. "Slip? As if I would, I'm a pro at giving piggy back rides, if you didn't know," Finn scoffed. Then he realized, "Oh, shit. I forgot my stick thing," and quickly turned around and started to run back to the previous course to get his putter. When he ran across the grass, his feet slid across the wet blades and he caught himself just before he could make them both fall. "See? A pro."

Mona frowned to herself, her arms squeezing around him reflexively. "Was that an accident? Or are you just a show off?" she teased, laughing lightly by his ear. The mud was starting to worry her a bit more and the rain was really starting to pick up--she could tell by the way it got harder to hear his voice over the sound.

Finn felt goosebumps as he felt the warmth of Mona's voice against his ear, and it just made him realize how much colder it was with the rain coming down. He bent down to reach for his putter and when he stood back up, he looked up at the sky. "Uh, I think we might need to rain check the rest of this match, Mona," he said, then started making their way under the closest shelter from getting anymore wet.

Mona pouted to herself, hugging him tighter for some reason despite him mentioning the game was over. She tucked her wet hair behind her ear and sighed. "Does that mean I won?" she hedged. Victory didn't feel as sweet when she felt worried that their date was over too soon.

Finn shook his head. "Uh, no. Because it's not over yet. You can't be the winner of a game that hasn't finished," he replied back matter-of-factly, wanting to emphasize both him having a chance to still win and them having a chance to come back again. Keeping her on his back for the piggyback ride, he quickly made his way back to the front of the mini golf course so they could return their putters and the pink and red balls. Finn looked over his shoulder so he can speak to Mona, "I'm sorry it doesn't look like we can enjoy your picnic out here."

Mona shrugged a bit, giving Finn yet another squeeze. "It's okay. Will you be taking a rain check on that too?" She hedged. You could almost head the furrow of her brows in her voice as he trotted them out of the park. As annoyingly competitive as they got, Mona still wanted more time for both of them to win something more.

Finn took his cell phone out of his pocket while they were under shelter from the rain. While checking the bus schedule to see when they would be able to board next, he continued to speak to Mona. "I don't want to," he said. He was honestly excited to see what food Mona had prepared, still curious from all the times he tried sneaking a look inside, and he didn't want her to think all her hard work went to waste. He was also getting hungry. "Well, we can't enjoy it out here, but it doesn't mean we can't enjoy it at all? Why won't we just eat it somewhere where it isn't raining?"

Mona laughed softly, pleased with the effort he was making to keep their date going. She hoped it meant he was enjoying her company as much as she was his. "It's rainig all over Seattle tho, finn," she reminded with a small laugh. she climbed a bit more up his back to peer over his shoulder and read his phone with him.

Finn read that the next bus should be arriving in about ten minutes, but he didn't want to make them run out and wait outside under the small bus stop. He put his phone back in his pocket, and gently pushed Mona higher on his back so that she wasn't lowering anymore. "Well, we can head back to campus aaaaaaand..." Finn leaned forward as he thought, and then stood back up properly as he said, "Eat inside back at the dorms?"

Mona smiled at his suggestion and hid her face in his shoulder. She hesitated for a moment then kissed his shoulder lightly, half hoping he wouldn't notice given the material of his jacket was thick. "We should definitely do that! I made some good shit!" She unwound his arms around him and put a thumbs up right in front of his face.

Finn pretended to try and bite her hands as she put them in front of his face, loudly taking chomps but not actually reaching to try and get her. "Good cause I'm hungry and I just might try to end up eating you instead."

Mona cracked up, covering her mouth so she wasn't too loud by his ear. "Stop! I made better food than me!" She laughed "we can eat each other another time!" She said, not realizing what she was saying until it was too late. Her laughter abruptly stopped, she took a breath, then she laughed again "ignore me, please!"

Finn laughed when she did. Whether or not she was actually implying anything, he thought it was funny but didn't want to give her a hard time about it. Finn looked for a change of topic but looking outside at the bus stop and asked, "Do you think if we go into the bus like this, the bus driver will only charge us as one person?"

Mona grinned, hugging him tightly again. "I should hide under your jacket! What a good way to save money," she laughed a bit. "Do you think you'd be able to carry me for another ten minutes?" She hedged. "If I'm heavy, you can put me down."

Finn looked over his shoulder and told her, "You're a genius, you know that? We'll be saving enough money to buy an actual bus for ourselves at this rate." He thought about her question, bending his knees so they went up and down a few times, and then leaning forward and backward and side to side. "I think we're good," he reassured her. "You're not heavy at all, but even if you were, I'm never putting you down. You'll never know what the ground is like again. I hope you had a good time walking on the mini golf course because that was the last time you ever walked for the rest of your life."

Mona: "What could we possibly need wth a bus?!" She joked. "We could save the money and I could pay you back for that red dress--then buy a bazillion more!" She said with a happy giggle. Her tiny frame swung as he wiggled them around and she held tightly, shutting her eyes. "I did have a great time!" She assured with a squeak. "But what could you gain from lugging a tiny girl around constantly?! Is this a fair symbiotic relationship? Is that the word?"

Finn rolled his eyes and said as though it was obvious, "That's why we're getting a bus, Mona. Where else are we going to be putting all those red dresses?" He laughed to let her know that he was joking. "Yeah, that's the word," Finn assured her, the continued to joke as he explained. "Facultative because we'll live like this by choice, and obligate because we can't survive unless we live together like this. It's a mutual symbiotic relationship because we're both gaining benefits from this relationship: you get a ride to travel places, and I get to spend more time with you."

Mona 's flashed for a moment and she was glad he couldn't see how red she'd gotten. "Ooh talk sciencey to me," she flirted, not bothering to mention she had no idea what facultative was. "I feel it might be inequal tho, as I get both transportation and time with a nice boy. You only get time!" Admittedly, she was fishing. She was starting to worry that she was not really as interesting as the many girls he'd flirted or been with before--especislly not when put in the context of helping him survive.

Finn shook his head, laughing at her. Outside, he could see the bus arriving. Before going outside, he paused for a moment to think about what she said, then somberly responded, "You know... I guess you're right. This is pretty inequal." Finn bent his knees down and gave her time so that she can get off of him and they could stop the piggyback ride. But before she actually could get off, he stood right back up and said, "Sike! This is actually a parasitism relationship where I benefit because I'm gonna eat all your food and you're the host who suffers because I'm gonna use you to block me from all the rain!" Then he ran outside, slightly leaning forward and looking down so his head wouldn't get wet, and towards the bus for them to board.

Mona gave a loud yelp as he picked her right back up. She barely had time to steady herself when he was already running off into the rain. "Finn!" She yelled again over the downpour. Her hair was soaked and she couldnt differentiate her clothes from the water. The rain stopped as quickly as it came and it was a testement to how hard it was coming down that she was already this soaked. The shelter of the bus was a welcomed warmth and she clutched tightly to him for more as they paid their dues and looked for a seat. "Okay, parasite, are you going to put me down?" She joked as they walked down the aisle.

Finn walked down the aisle, the bottoms of his shoes squeaking as he kicked water on the floors of the bus. He walked to the very back of the bus, and then said with groan, "Fine. I guess you can get down now." Finn finally let Mona get off his back and took a look at her, seeing that she was more wet from the rain than he expected. "Holy shit," Finn tried to stop himself from laughing out loud. He took off his jacket to give her, "You protected me more than I expected."

Mona laughed shyly, tucking her damp hair behind her ears. She wiped her face with her hand once, checking to see if her make up had smudged. When he offered his jacket it, she took it shyly and put it on before sitting down. It swallowed her and her fingers barely came out of the bottom. "Thank you, finn!" She said with a small smile. "For your time. And your clothes."

Finn sat down next to her at the back of the bus and put the picnic basket on his lap. He smiled back at her, "Thank you for everything, too." Finn pushed his hair back, raking out the dampness of the rain with his fingers. As the bus started to move, he settled back into his seat and shifted his body so that he could face Mona. He asked, "So how're your parents? You mentioned a while back about their birthdays coming up, right?"

Mona looked up in mild surprise, not thinking he'd remember that. "Oh, they're good? I have a call with them tomorrow again... Their birthday is in early March," she explained. "I don't think they expect me to come home, so...they won't mind that I am not able to." She shifted uncomfortably, herself minding that she wasn't able to but trying to ignore that fact.

Finn could hear the change of tone in Mona's voice and wasn't sure if talking about her parents was something he should press on about, or even have brought up in the first place. He remembered from Christmas Eve when she mentioned how she missed her family and how she might do more of what they wanted her to do if she saw them more, but it didn't occur to him how less she did see them. Finn put his hand on the picnic basket and traced his fingers against the edge of the lid, pretending to distract himself from how uncomfortable she was so he had reason to ask on, "What would you have done if you could go? How would you want to celebrate their birthday with them?"

Mona stared down at her fingers, laughing to herself at his question. "I'd want to look at them?" She said, smiling harder to overcompensate. "It's been almost four years...I can't see their wrinkles on the computer, but I think there are probably more. I'd like to look at them. They're probably more beautiful now." She rubbed her nose awkwardly, only getting a look at him through her periphery. "Maybe I'd cook for them? I think I've gotten good at it, since I've been cooking for myself. I'd want to be able to tell them stories they could be proud of but--" she made a noise of impatience to herself. Her posture changed and she looked out the window. "I'm not going. So. I will write them a nice card, and not make them worry."

Finn listened to Mona speak closely, not quite knowing what to say to her in response but also knowing that his silence may be good enough to let her keep talking without any fear of interjection. Four years time was about the same amount of time since his mother passed so he knew how it felt to miss someone for so long, but he couldn't imagine the type of feeling it was to miss someone that was still alive and you had a chance to see in person still. He reached his hand over to put it on top of Mona's, slipping his hand through the sleeve of his jacket that she wore so that their hands were hidden inside. Finn gave her hand a small squeeze.

Mona: Her posture softened once again at his touch and she turned to look at him, her eyes cloudy as she tried to read him. She remembered him sharing about his mother, and how it was painfully relieving to hear it from him. If she was lucky, he felt a similar kindness toward her--and if not, well she didn't want him to worry. Taking a small breath, she offered him a smile. "I think I've found things around this area that will cheer me up if I miss them," she assured. "And it will give me time to become better at things, I guess, until I can see them again."

Finn: "Better at what?" Finn asked her. While still holding her hand, he adjusted himself lower in his seat so he can comfortably rest his head on her shoulder. "If I were you, that card you're gonna write to your parents would basically say, 'Dear mom and dad, Happy birthday. You deserve a good one for birthing the best daughter in the world. Thanks from the best daughter in the world.'"

Mona wrinkled her nose, laughing softly at his suggestion. "You don't know that I am," she said, laughing more. "But I appreciate the vote of confidence." She sighed, giving his hand a squeeze. She pushed back the sleeve, tracing idly over the veins in his hand, wondering if the blood beneath was moving as fast as her own pulse. "I'll have to write it in Korean, as my English writing is kind of...stalled?" She sighed. "I need to get better at that. And at just..." She made to shift uncomfortably, but remembered how nice it felt to have his giant self rest clumsily against her shoulder. So she sighed again and sat still. "Better at the things they expect me to be good in, I guess. It's the least I could do."

Finn felt an itch on his temple and gently rubbed his head against Mona's shoulder. "I could help you with your English writing if you want," he mumbled. From where the way they were sitting, he could smell the rain water off her trying to both mask and blend in with the distinct scent of Mona, a mix between the laundry soap she washed her clothes with and probably the shampoo she washed her hair with. Finn snuggled closer into her and only needed to whisper since they sat so close to each other, "I can help you get better at things if you want me to." He paused for a moment, trying to match breathing in and out with her. Then he added, "But if you don't want me to, that's fine and up to you. Whether or not you get better or stay the same for what your parents expect you to be good in, or even if you get worse than you originally were, I'm still rooting for you."

Mona gave a mix of a groan and a laugh. "If I got worse there wouldn't be a point to keep trying," she sighed, not sure how much lower she could sink after literally sinking to the bottom of the bottom in classes. "But. . . it's really sweet of you to offer," she said quietly, trying to process it herself. People were always offering to help her, but she was never sure how much they'd be willing if they truly knew how much work it would take. Finn's kindness was different, though. It was help for the sake of help, not the expectation of a grade; he'd made that much clear. "I feel like I could keep trying, though. With your encouragement. And that's actually... Really more reassuring than anything at the moment." Taking on dating seemed maybe irresponsible given all her other priorities, but at this specific moment I made her feel capable. She could do this, she thought. And then maybe she could do everything else, too.

Finn closed his eyes. He was tired or wanted to sleep, but the moment felt comforting to him like a familiar dream and he wanted to take the second to remember it. When he opened his eyes again, he sat back up in his seat and adjusted himself so that he could put his arm around Mona's shoulders. He looked out the window and passed the kaleidoscope of rain drops that gathered on the glass and reflected the outdoor lights. "It looks like we're almost back," Finn said.

Mona leaned into the crook of his shoulder this time. Her eyes wandered out the window and she gave a small nod. Patting her own tummy, she asked "have you worked up an appetite?"

Finn looked down at his own stomach. "I can eat a horse right now," he said. "It's actually pretty impressive how much I've held myself back from eating all your food in this picnic basket already."

Mona laughed lightly. "That must mean you're learning self-control!" she joked. As the bus pulled up to their stop, she reluctantly got up from leaning against him. But with his hand still in hers, she led him off the bus. "Where shall we go?" she asked

Finn stood up after she did and followed her off the bus. He looked up outside and squinted his eyes, seeing that the rain had intermittently stopped but the grey clouds threatened to continue at any moment. Finn looked back at Mona and shrugged his shoulders as he suggested, "Want to go back to mine?"

Mona nodded a little. "Have you cleaned recently?" she joked playfully, leading him back to the dorms. "Or is this your way to get me to help you with your chores again?"

Finn shook his head. "No. I haven't cleaned anything in so long-- I swear, there's something growing at the corner of my room." He started laughing at how ridiculous he thought his own joke was, then playfully pleaded, "Mona, you have to help me!"

Mona looked up, narrowing her eyes at him. "We'll see how unliveable it is when we get there before I help. Otherwise, I'm going to watch you clean it while I eat my picnic!" She joked.

Finn opened the front door to the dorm building to let Mona enter before him, and walked beside her as they got to the elevator and he pushed the button to go up. "You are so cruel," he laughed. "Will you be willing to spare a few bites for the poor cleaning boy?"

Mona smiled cheekily, shrugging one shoulder as she looked up at him. "If he's charming enough, I think I could be persuaded to share!" When the elevator doors opened for their floor, she let go of his hand and took her basket back for herself. As they walked down the hall, she glanced at him and hedged, "Has this been a good date? I've never planned a date before. . ."

Finn took his keys out from his pocket and used it to unlock his door when they arrived at his dorm. "Well, it's not over yet, so I can't give a proper answer. But, I mean, I guess from a scale of zero to ten, with zero being the absolute worst experience in my life..." he averted his eyes and gave a dramatic pause as he thought about it seriously. "I'd say this is over 9000." As he entered his room, he picked up the jacket laying on the edge of his bed and threw it to hang onto his computer desk chair. While there was a stack of unread textbooks and homework on his desk and some of his bags on the floor pushed aside to the border of his room, nothing was too messy to get in the way and his bed was made and he deemed all of it clean enough.

Mona smiled stupidly to herself at his answer, waddling after him with a giddiness she had a hard time containing. She barely noticed him attempting to tidy, as she was happy to be here regardless of the mess. Mona took her sneakers off at the door, grimacing at how waterlogged they were. She found the center of the room and set her basket down, also shrugging off his jacket. Her, or rather his, sweater had dried just a bit to not be too troublesome, but her white tennis skirt hung limp from sogginess. She sighed, thinking there was little she could do, and bent to take the blanket from her basket and set it on the floor. "Sit," she instructed simply, before doing so as well and unpacking the food.

Finn looked over his shoulder and saw that Mona had taken off her shoes, and he did the same. He kicked his wet shoes off to the side of his bed and then sat down where she instructed. With his legs criss-crossed, he put his elbows on knees and his cheeks on the palms of his hands as he watched her start to unpack the food. As he waited, he would cover his eyes with his fingers, then separate his fingers so he can look through his hands, then he would hide his eyes again, and then peer through his fingers once more.

Mona caught him in her periphery as she unpacked. "It's not a secret anymore, Finn!" she said, clucking her tongue. She knelt down across from him and pulled his hands off his eyes. "you're allowed to look--I'd rather you did, so I don't have to feed you!" she laughed a bit, wrinkling her nose. Sitting properly now, she gestured to each of the tupperwares. "This is tteokbokki. It's made from . . . uhm, rice cake? And there's cheese and . . . It tastes like . .. Gino's Italian gnocci," she explained, excited she had a comparison. "And then I brought kimchi, and some meats . . . A lot of meat. Is that okay?"

Finn groaned, "Aw, I was hoping you were going to." He laughed with her, and then put his hands in his lap and sat up straight as he watched her attentively, nodding his head at each piece she brought out and described. "That is more than okay," Finn stared wide-eyed at all the food she brought. "How did... When did you have the time to make all of this? This is so insane, Mona!"

Mona laughed shyly, shaking her head. "I started around 8 last night, after I made myself do some homework. . . It was stress relieving for me!" she assured. "Apart from the bit where i stayed up late and was almost late to class for it. . . But if you walked by the student kitchens last night, you would have seen me there," she laughed shyly. At the bottom of the basket were some plates and chopsticks. She passed them to him and nodded. "serve yourself--can you use these?" she asked, picking up the chopsticks and pinching them together.

Finn smiled, "Thanks for losing sleep and almost being late to class for this then. It looks so god, so I think it was worth it!" He took the plate and chopsticks from her and held onto the chopsticks between his fingers, fumbling around with them for a moment before having them positioned correctly. As he practiced picking up imaginary things in the air with his chopsticks, he asked, "I feel like there are some classes that just give way too much homework to stress over... You did finish your homework though, right?"

Mona watched him, amused as he picked at the air. She picked up her own chopsticks and began putting things on his plate. She sighed a little. "Yeah, I finished what was due. . . I'm just worried about all the homework picking up as the semester really starts, you know?" she asked with a nervous laugh. She shook her head a little. "it's stupid. . . It's jsut school, right?" she sighed.

Finn saw that she started serving herself, so he used his chopsticks to place some kimchi on her plate. "Yeah, it gets pretty exhausting. School's stupid," he said while trying to focus on being able to pick up the food. When he got enough for himself, he smiled proudly at himself, and then returned his full attention to Mona. "You know you can talk to your teachers about that, right? If you just tell them that you're getting bombarded with a bunch of assignments at once, most of the time they'll understand and grade you easier."

Mona picked at her food, glancing up at him tentatively. She gave an embarrassed laugh and admitted, "Would it be bad. . . if I told you I've talked to my teachers, and I'm still like. . . I can't keep up sometimes," she sighed.

Finn shrugged his shoulders, "Talking to them isn't about you being able to keep up afterwards, it's about letting them know that you actually are trying and not like, fucking around and behind on their work just because you don't wanna do it." He picked up a piece of vegetable from the kimchi and tasted it, chewing on it slowly at first to taste the flavor, and then nodded his head as he swallowed when he finally decided that he liked it. Finn looked back at his date and continued, "It's not bad at all. Really."

Mona laughed nervously. She took a beat, thought to answer, but decided to eat for a bit. "I mean," she began, covering her mouth with a napkin. "Sometimes I don't want to do it. Like you said, its a lot, right?" she sighed a little. "And I could be on fun dates like this instead?" Mona looked up at him through her lashes and offered a small smile, hoping he'd be more flattered than disappointed.

Finn held his chopsticks, twirling them between his fingers for a moment as he stared at Mona for a moment. He put his chopsticks down on his plate and offered a similar smile back at Mona. "That means you're having fun on this date?"

Mona she nodded, putting her chopsticks down and leaning in a bit more just to smile at him. "That means I'm having a lot of fun!" she assured, nodding. She picked up some meat with her chopsticks and offered it to him. As she got closer, Mona purposefully got it on his face, leaving chili sauce all over his cheek.

Finn opened his mouth to eat the food she picked up and scrunched his nose as soon as he felt it get on his face. He tried to lick off the sauce but his tongue couldn't reach so he gave up after a few tries and ended up just laughing. Finn wiped his face with his hand and licked the sauce off his fingers. "Whoa, this really is good," he said. He looked at the meat, and then at Mona, and then getting a new idea he said "Here, you have to try it" as he used his chopsticks to pick some more meat up and put it on Mona's cheek.

Mona she made a face, scowling at him as if she hadn't done the same to him. She took a piece of kimchi and simply threw it at him this time with her chopsticks. When it landed on his tshirt, she lifted her arms in the air in excitement. "Ten points!" she joked, grinning cheekily at him.

Finn put his chopsticks and plate down. He looked down at his shirt and back at Mona with a frown. "Not cool! That stuff tastes good," he said as he picked the kimchi off with his fingers and ate it. Finn reached over to the container holding the kimchi and held it in his arms, guarding it away from Mona. "You should've made this stuff spicier next time because you need to chill!"

Mona made a face, making grabbing hands and leaning toward him so she could have her kimchi back. "If you like it so much, you can keep the leftovers! But share!" she pouted at him and bat her eyes. "Please?"

Finn rolled his eyes as he gave in and put the container back to where it was so she could reach it, too. He picked up his chopsticks again, and then suddenly used them to pick up some kimchi and throw it at her. When it landed on her arm, he copied her from earlier and lifted his arms in the air in excitement. "Five points!"

Mona picked the kimchi off her sweater and threw it at him with a laugh "Cheap shot! You told me to stop!" she reminded, picking up more from the container and throwing three in a row at him. "You're going to smell awful!" she said with a sinister laugh. She curled up into a ball in case he wanted to retaliate, then threw one more at him for good measure.

Finn lowered his arms to block the food from hitting his face, but he didn't stop it from landing on his clothes and leaving marks of red. "I tried to dress so nice for you and this is what you do?" He took each piece of food off of himself and put it on his plate. "You're going to get it!" Finn tried to sound intimidating, but he couldn't stop laughing. He crawled on the ground closer to Mona and rolled her so that she on her back, and then grabbed his plate and held it above her and slightly tilted it, threatening to pour the kimchi onto her.

Mona looked up at him as she rolled over like a rolley-poly, eyes widening fearfully. The smile on her face remained like the ghost of a laugh threatening to return. She couldn't tell if he was serious, but that was half the fun. At the very least, she knew it was his sweater he'd be ruining. Mona lay flat and scrunched her eyes up as she surrendered. "Mercy!" she squeaked, laughing lightly.

Finn carried his laundry basket from his room to the third floor and to Room 303. All of his teachers have yet to contact him about missing the past three days of classes, but even if they did ask, he wasn't sure what he would tell them. It had been five days since the Winter Formal Dance and he was tired from everything that happened, since the morning of getting prepared to the late night the next day with his confrontation with Jael, but being tired was never a good enough excuse for missing classes. It probably wasn't a good idea either to tell them that he'd been spending those days cooped up in his dorm room playing Battlefront and living off bags of Hot Cheetos and Juicy Juice boxes and only leaving to go to basketball practice. Three days was a long amount of time in teen years, so that was why he convinced himself to do at least one productive thing: laundry. Wearing sneakers, a pair of grey sweatpants, and an old maroon sweater with the word "PORTUGAL" across his chest, he carried his laundry basket to Room 303 and knocked. "Hey, Darby? You got any laundry soap I can borrow?"

Mona: The high of the dance had faded slowly throughout the night itself, and was seeping out of her in a way that was sadder than she'd like to admit. It was foolish to read into things, maybe. Seeing things more loosely might make the smile on her face easier as well, and so she resigned herself to that and tried to focus on more productive things. She had a pile of loose papers stacked on her desk, all math problems her tutor had assigned, as well as English books filled with post-its of Korean translations that made things easier for her. As a break, she decided to focus on things she was good at: chores. She was just tidying her room, throwing clothes into her hamper and organizing her desk, when a knock came at the door. Mona opened it, not thinking of the fact that she was just in an oversized t-shirt and some sleeping shorts. Her eyes went big as she saw the silly boy she'd been thinking about more and more loosely in the last few days. Despite herself, her thoughts tightened and her smile grew, though bashfully. "Uhm, Darby's not in. . . Would you like to borrow some of mine?" she glanced back at her full hamper. "I was actually headed to do my laundry, too."

Finn smiled at the girl who answered the door. It was a smaller and weaker smile than he wanted to give her, but it was the most he could do against all the thoughts cultivating in his head these past few days that were convincing him that he didn't deserve to even be hanging out with her as much as he wanted to. He wanted to do so much and he wanted so much to do with her, but wanting so much from people seemed to be the root of most of his problems lately. "She's probably off drinking the weed or snorting the alcohols-- whatever that crazy girl is usually up to," he joked about Darby, looking over his shoulder in case she showed up behind him. Finn looked back at Mona, staring at her face and trying not to notice the fact that it looked like she didn't even have any pants on. "You wouldn't mind doing laundry together?"

Mona laughed at his joke, her nose wrinkling at how preposterous the idea of Darby doing any of those things was. He said the strangest things, but they were very welcomed--as was his company now. She nodded maybe too eagerly for a girl trying to be casual with her crush and scurried off to grab her pink hamper decorated in hearts. She bent to pack her soaps and fabric softener neatly into the hamper with her clothes then went to join him at the door. "My detergent is called 'sweet meadow.' You wouldn't mind that would you?"

Finn paused, looking up at the ceiling as he thought. "I don't know. 'Sweet meadow' sounds like something one of my online friends from Ireland would like... Which is a good thing, so I guess I wouldn't mind." Finn shrugged his shoulders and gave in. He stepped back further into the hallway, holding onto his basket of clothes, and told her, "I haven't done my own laundry for a while, so I swear I'll pay you back all the soap I borrow."

Mona had been so focused on her excitement to hang out with Finn that she hadn't noticed how full his laundry basket was until now. She gave a surprised laugh and waved him off. "I think I am doing society a favor by lending you soap for that mess. You can pay me back in hero worship," she joked lightly. "Sweet meadow is how I get myself smelling so lovely," she added cheekily, smiling at him from over her shoulder as they walked. Mona pretended to lean over and give him a sniff. "I think this shirt could do with some too!"

Finn: "If we don't get to washing these clothes right now, there won't be a society left with all of my dirty laundry," Finn said as he started making his way to the third floor laundromat. He honestly didn't think his clothes smelled that bad, or maybe he was just immune to it, but he had no disagreement with getting his clothes to smell like Mona. As he walked, he told her, "This is literally my last outfit so unless you want me to do laundry naked or take more of Kohl's clothes without him knowing, you're just gonna have to deal with this shirt until we're done."

Mona wrinkled her nose at him again. "How long have you been wearing that shirt for?" she asked curiously. She took a moment to look him over and refamiliarize herself. He was talking as much as he always seemed to. She wondered if he felt distant to her simply because she tried to distance her mind from him, or if something had changed.

Finn hesitated to tell her, but he did anyways. "Since Monday." Even though he had shared more things with her that he considered to be private to him, and even though the two have done things that arguably only people who were close together would feel comfortable doing, he felt a sudden wave of fear wash over him. Maybe it was because he didn't realize how ridiculous missing classes and wearing the same clothes since Monday sounded until he actually told someone else. Finn looked back at her and told her, "Don't judge me."

Mona 's face was blank, for the most part, except for her jaw dropped the slightest bit. She closed it quickly by biting on her lip and nodding as she thought of ways to try and make him comfortable again. "My favorite pair of underwear isn't even mine; it's a pair I just found in the dryer once that I took home because it was cute," she said with a small laugh. "I've also stolen socks, and this t-shirt--" she said, tugging on the shirt she was wearing. "So I can't judge you for wearing your own clothes for three days."

Finn stared at the shirt Mona wore as though in disbelief. "Well, like I said earlier, I've got some of Kohl's clothes in here," he said, then looked down at his own clothes and stuck his hand in to shift about through it. "I'm pretty sure I have some of Darby's sweaters in here, too..." Finn gave up trying to find any piece of clothing to show her as proof, and returned his attention back to her. With a smirk, he asked, "Am I gonna have to pay attention to all my clothes as we do laundry? You're not gonna be taking any, are you?"

Mona laughed a bit. "I don't know. you're so gigantic I think it'd be obvious if I was taking clothes your size home with me--but I might try to take darby's clothes back," she mused, peeking up and over into his hamper. She poked at some sweaters and tugged on a maroon one. "This one does feel really comfy, though. . . " Mona let her words hang in the air in a playful, but threatening manner, smiling to herself all the way until they'd reached the laundry room. She set her hamper down on the table and began to sort through her different items, watching him in his periphery to see if he'd do the same. She hummed at first to kill the time, but she found herself too anxious with curiosity to stay quiet. "How'd you manage to wear that shirt for three days to classes? Our school is not called portugal."

Finn follow behind Mona into the laundry room and set his basket down beside her on the table. He took off the bag of Hot Cheetos from the top of his basket that he brought with him to eat while waiting for the washers to finish later, and then started separating his clothes into different piles. "Haven't been going to classes these past three days," Finn answered her easily, but after he said it out loud, he wanted to take it back. Looking for a distraction to hopefully shift their attention elsewhere, he took the maroon sweater she found earlier and tossed it into her pile of clothes. Then he took another sweater and threw it into her pile. And then he put another. And another.

Mona was startled for more than one reason. She kept trying to catch the clothes he'd throw onto her things but he was quite quick, and she barely had time to process what he'd said. Trying to focus more on the issue at hand, but also trying to seem casual yet again, she carefully moved his sweaters into their corresponding color piles. "Three days? How. . ." she paused, not sure how to approach the question, other than to just ask. "How come? I'm not judging you, I promise. Hiding in a hole for three days sounds really nice. . ." especially when she thought about the embarrassment she'd been starting to feel regarding him, since their separation the night of the dance.

Finn: "I don't know," Finn shrugged his shoulders. He separated his clothes quickly between colors and whites as he tried to think of what to tell Mona. "Keeping yourself in a shit hole because you feel shitty? It's really not that nice." Finn put down a pair of jeans on top of one of his piles, and then stopped. "I'm sorry, I'm just--" The last thing he wanted to do was take it out on Mona when she had nothing to do with why he felt so bad lately. He took a deep breath to calm himself down, and then continued to separate his clothes at a much slower pace. "I don't know. I'm sorry. Things just aren't as nice as they sound."

Mona frowned to herself. His haphazard piling had combined many of their clothes on the small table provided. Feeling her own impatience grow, she nudged her way over and began sorting both their clothes for them. She knew Jae needed help Saturday, and she knew that whatever it was caused Jae to be upset with her on Sunday. And now, days later, she found herself on yet another end of misplaced anger, only making a small tantrum boil within her as well. Her hands were much quicker, but less sloppy, than finn's as she shorted their things. "No, things aren't," she said in a clipped tone. Mona worked on turning his jeans inside out, glad to have something to relieve her stress, even if she thought his pants were ridiculously, freakishly long.

Finn looked at Mona, furrowing his eyebrows and confused at her response. From all the time he knew her, he had never heard her say a response so short and curt. Finn knew he was messing up. Biting down on his bottom lip, he started to pick through the piles of clothes he just threw down and started to cautiously separate them cautiously. "I'm sorry," he said, his voice lowered. "I really don't know what I'm doing... Sorry."

Mona was tempted to ignore him, not really sure why he'd asked for her time if it was meant to be spent with his mind somewhere else again. But as she set his pants down, she was surprised to see her chapstick roll out of his pocket. She picked it up, chewing her bottom lip again; he'd stolen this from her weeks ago, and as she uncorked it she realized he'd also used it all up. Mona took a deep breath, letting her shoulders relax, as she finally turned to regard him again. "It's fine. It's hard to know what to do when you feel shitty, I think," she said, mustering a weak smile. "Just . . .try and focus on what makes you happiest." With that, she sighed again and continued to sort their laundry together. He really did have a lot of dirty laundry, it seemed.

Finn nodded his head to show that he listened and understood what she said. As he sorted through his clothes, he found some pieces that he couldn't recognize as his or anyone's he took from, or if they actually were his, then it really had been so long that he last did laundry that he couldn't even tell which clothes he has worn before. He tried to keep his mind away from the things that were stressing him these past days and focus on what made him happiest. "You know, you looked really great in that red dress," Finn said out loud suddenly. "Like, I'm really glad we went with that one."

Mona 's grip tightened on a shirt she was holding, that happened to be as red as her face and the dress he was speaking of. "Thank you," she said quietly, trying not to let herself get too flattered. She recalled the way he'd held her that evening and believed that he truly meant it, but she also recalled his arms leaving her too soon. Mechanically, she replied, "you have good taste, and I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was nice while it lasted." The last bit came out as a sort of unexpected sigh. She didn't mean to make him feel bad. More red than ever, she quickly continued to sort her clothes, moving faster if only to hide the pieces of underwear that had gotten mixed in.

Finn frowned. Even though her response was a positive one, it wasn't quite the one he expected still. He knew that he hadn't been acting as open and sociable the past days as he normally did, but he didn't realize how much it would affect those around him, and especially Mona. That voice in his head wouldn't stop repeating how selfish he was for expecting Mona to remain the exciting person he knew her as when he wasn't even acting the same for her. It was getting harder and harder for him to keep up with this. "You know the one time you actually looked more beautiful than you did in that red dress?" He said, giving another attempt to lighten things for the both of them. "When you had all of that cupcake on your face. Like, damn. Imagine if you went to Winter Formal like that? Everyone would've just fainted right there. And, no need to think of what to bring to the next potluck you're invited to because you'd just be serving face, girl."

Mona blushed a deeper red as he complimented her further. She used loading their clothes into the washer as a much needed excuse to busy herself and hide her face, which had someone sprung yet another smile. It felt like he was laying it on thick and the defensive part of her mind told her not to be so easily bought--but the surprisingly more rational part of her mind reminded her that, on his better days, Finn was always this ridiculous. "You are . . . you're too much, Finn," she said, laughing lightly as she stuffed the clothes into the wash. She gestured for him to help her close the higher machines stacked on top and to help her dispense the soap. She admired how tall he was as he loaded the machines up. "You know what would've made you more attractive at the dance? If you had that cupcake beard. I think that's where we went wrong. I definitely would've spent more time with you if you had cupcake beard. You're lucky I spent any time with you at all." She tapped her chin thoughtfully, as if serious about the idea. It wasn't even close to what actually happened, but perhaps they were ready to make light of it.

Finn leaned his side against the table, waiting for Mona's response. It was only at the sound of her laughter that he felt a sense of relief and smiled. He helped pour the right amounts of soap for each load in the washing machines. "I definitely am the luckiest," he said as he closed the cap on the bottle of soap and placed it back down. He closed the doors, his hands lingering in the metal handles for a moment as he thought of what he should say next. Finn turned to Mona and mused, "If you could do Winter Formal all over again, would you?"

Mona blinked at his question, puzzled that he would ask it. "It is what it is, right?" she asked hurriedly, turning away and making to reorganize her soaps and hamper. With her back to him, she felt braver. "I'm happy I got to go. It wasn't everything I thought it would be, but that doesn't mean it wasn't fun...Or anyone's fault." Mona climbed up onto the laundry table to perch there until their loads had finished. She got a good look at him better this way, and offered a small shrug. "Would you?"

Finn gave the question some thought, not only thinking of what answer he would give but also what answer he should give. "I would redo it all if it means it could be exactly the same, except I danced better and Jonah Hill was there... For no reason, like he was just there," he joked. Finn reached over to grab the bag of Hot Cheetos he brought and opened it. He ate one to make sure it wasn't stale, and then held the bag towards Mona to offer her some. Finn stared at Mona, and then looked down. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

Mona laughed a bit at that, finding his taste odd but remember to save any other Jonah Hill movies she still hadn't seen for a day with him--if he were willing. "Maybe Jonah Hill would've made a better date for you, then," she joked a bit, laughing to herself as she leaned over and peeked into the bag, taking one or two between her thumb and pointer finger--trying to soil as few fingers as possible for when she started folding. The food gave her a distraction as she thought over what she'd said. She gave a small nod of thanks and, after she finished chewing, nodded again. "Yeah, sure. Please do!" her eyes flickered over him, wondering what he could possibly want to know.

Finn laughed lightly. "Nah, I'd never trust Jonah Hill as a date. I'd never wanna be known as the guy who asked the cop to drug bust everyone at the dance." He paid attention to the Hot Cheeto powder that got stuck on his fingers and watched as it fell off as he rubbed his fingers against each other. He was suddenly feeling nervous to ask her the question he wanted to know the answer to and trying to find reason to delay asking it. "I know you go to parties and drink and stuff..." Finn started off, his voice gradually becoming quieter with each other. "Have you ever done anything that went too far with someone else?"

Mona laughed at that, her eyes crinkling. "You mean drug bust you, more like!" she joked, covering her mouth as she laughed some more. Slowly, she felt more relaxed--if only to curb the way her companion had begun to fidget. She scooted back, sitting cross legged on the table with her back to the wall, her head tilted as she listened attentively. Her eyes watched him closely as he looked anywhere but at her, and she felt herself grow a bit more confused by his question. "I . . . no?" she laughed nervously, tucking hair behind her ear. "I always say never be afraid to try everything once. But I try to time my trying for when it feels right, or at least when I feel I need it. I-I haven't felt that way yet," she said quietly, feigning innocence. "I don't know what you mean though? One time, I made a dumb boy look over a roof he was scared of. sometimes I wonder if that was too far?" Even when she was particularly sad, her self-indulgence strayed more towards trying to make other people happy with her.

Finn listened to her as she spoke and he smiled at the allusion she made to the night they hung out together at his party over a month ago. "What I mean is... You know, like..." Finn wanted to be honest with Mona, and he even promised her before that he would, but honesty was always a struggle. He didn't know what made it more difficult, the fact that it was something he was anxious to confess or the fact that she was someone he was afraid to lose if he told her. He spoke softly even though it was hard to say, "I mean... I mean like how I've had some sex with some girls that might've liked me, but I didn't actually like back... Like that?" He stared back at Mona as though waiting for her to answer his question, but really because he needed to see her reaction to understand what to do with the immense amount of guilt building inside of him.

Mona had a signature blank look, one that wasn't practiced purposefully but only so because she put it into play so often when she was afraid of less than savory feelings. It bought her time now, but only so long before she herself felt uncomfortable--causing her to laugh softly. "Oh. . . Right. You flirt with so many girls, I should've realized. . . " she looked away, head still tilted but eyes cast downward at her shoes. "Did you know they liked you? Like that?" she steeled herself and managed to look at him--only this time, her face was not blank. Her eyebrows were crinkled and she had the ghost of a small smile, as if hoping there was something worth being happy over from his phrasing.

Finn put the bag of chips down on the table and then kept his hands to his sides. Now that Mona wasn't even looking at his direction, he couldn't tell what to do with himself. "Yes-- I mean, no. I mean," his hands balled up into fists so hard that he could feel his nails start digging into his palms. "I don't know what they think, I just know that I felt-- I have no excuse. I'm just... Sorry." He started to say to Mona, and for everyone else, "I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry."

Mona shook her head, tucking her hair behind her ear. "Don't be sorry to me," she said gently. She took his cheetoh bag and picked through it idly, trying to seem relaxed. "I think sometimes. . . Sometimes we hurt people without meaning to. And once they're hurt, you can't make them feel anything unless they're ready." She sighed a little, thinking more of her situation with her parents and how she'd yet to apologize to them. How could she blame Finn in this instance? Though it wasn't entirely the same, she still hoped that when the time came, someone would show her a similar mercy. "It matters more that you try to be better. and try to acknowledge what you did wrong. Can you do that?"

Finn turned around and leaned forward onto the table, putting his elbows down and propping his head up in his hands. "I mean, I'm trying," he covered his eyes with his hands and thought back on the night when he returned to campus from Winter Formal and confronted Jael. The memories of it seeped through his mind like a movie reel, and then he ran his hands through his hair. He laced his fingers together and rested his cheek on his hands so that he could look to his side where Mona was. "Yeah," he said. "I can do that."

Mona shrugged a little "Then . . . you just have to hope someone will give you the time to see what your trying can do," she said quietly, drawing doodles on her knees with the cheetoh dust on her finger. "I hope it works out for you. I'm sorry you turned out to be such a heartbreaker," she said, laughing quietly and regarding him with soft eyes. "They call it a compliment all the time, but I'm not so sure now." Finn looked quite torn up about the whole situation, and she knew you either had to let the wound breathe or hide it and hope it scabs over. But she had her own wounds to pick with him that, as much as it pained her to poke him over, she knew she had to press on. Clearing her throat, she hugged her knees close to her chest and lay her cheek on them, looking sideways at him as he had her. "Is that what you were doing Saturday? When I told you to go ahead?"

Finn let Mona's voice sink in as he gradually slid his arms all the way down on the table. He put each hand on either elbow and hid his face in his arms so that Mona couldn't see his face and he couldn't see Mona anymore. "Kinda," his voice was muffled. Finn rubbed his forehead against the sleeves of his old sweater. "I don't think Jae and I will ever go back to being friends like we used to be... But I think it's better that way."

Mona frowned to herself, starting to piece everything together. "When you guys were . . . intimate?" she made a face to herself at the word, but tried to remind herself it wasn't about her. "Did you know she liked you then? And this whole time?" Suddenly, she felt some guilt right along with him.

Finn explained, "We only fooled around once or twice at Bible Camp. This past New Year's, she kissed me and I kissed her back, but I ended up telling her that I didn't like her anything more than just friends." He closed his eyes tightly so that he couldn't see anymore light that crept through the spaces between his arms. "And the night of Winter Formal, when I found her, she was just so... Upset. I don't know, I just felt so bad seeing her like that. I ended up telling her I couldn't."

Mona was at a loss, not really sure where to begin. "I don't think what you did--all this fooling around stuff--was right, by the way," she said quietly. "I don't really know why you did it? It doesn't sound like it made anyone happy. . . But 'Couldn't?'" she repeated. "I . . . i dont know what that means. Maybe there really isn't anything you could do, so you tried too hard to be something that didn't make sense. But I think honesty is the most important thing now. So if you 'can't'... if that was honest then. . . " she shrugged to herself, not really paying attention to whether or not he could see. She just stared straight onward, watching their clothes in the wash and wondering how she'd stumbled upon such a mess when she was just looking for a crush.

Finn stopped hiding his face down on the table and stood back up. He turned around so he can sit on the table with Mona, his legs still hanging off the edge so his feet were touching the ground. "I just, like... I get scared sometimes. Of being alone. And it's really selfish what I did just so I wouldn't be alone, I know this now..." Finn looked down at his hands, one hand holding onto the other as his thumb kneaded circles into his palm. "I don't think she and I can be friends anymore, and we can't really agree to being anything else. I think she didn't want to be anything less than friends because she liked me, but I realized that I didn't want to be anything more than friends because I liked someone else."

Mona put her head on her cheek to watch him again, noting how small he seemed when he folded in on himself like this. "I think it'd be really hard to lose you as a friend," she said, not sure if it was kind or hurtful to do so. "But I don't think everything is meant to be easy. And not everything is meant to go the way you want. . . for things like that, i just focus on my own happiness." She shrugged a bit. "I don't know if its right, but when youre overwhelmed, its the least you can do for yourself?"

Finn pressed his lips together as he tried to think of what to say next. These past couple of days he'd so readily accepted that he couldn't do anything because he didn't know anything at all. Now waiting in the laundry room for his and her clothes to finish being washed, Mona's words were the only things he could say he knew for sure. "You know," Finn kept his face down at his hands as he spoke, while looking at Mona from the side of his eyes as though she was too bright for him too see face on. "There was that one point at the dance where I stepped away and when I came back, you were talking and dancing and smiling with other people and... It's nothing bad on your part, but damn, it just made me realize that, like... I want to spend time with you, Mona. I want to talk to you, I want to hang out with you, I want to do a lot of things with you-- but I keep letting other things stop me from doing all that."

Mona: Her eyes widened a bit at his confession and she couldn't help but laugh warmly at that. As he spoke, he still looked small--maybe in a more humble sense more so than sad, but there were definite undertones of sadness to it. "That whole time, when I was laughing and talking with everyone else, I just thought maybe it was because you'd be happier if you were somewhere else too. . . I didn't realize what was holding you back, but I don't blame you for it either--Isn't that the worst?" she asked with a mix of a groan and a laugh. "Even with good news. . . At times, it feels like we can't make everyone happy, can we? "

Finn: "This is the worst,” Finn groaned, too. He couldn't help but smile to himself, finally starting to feel comfortable enough to actually share his thoughts with somebody and letting Mona's infectious optimism affect him. "Well, when it feels like we can't make everyone happy, then I guess that could be considered a moment to focus on your own happiness. It's the least you can do for yourself," he shrugged a bit, repeating what she had just told him. He stopped looking down at his hands and shifted his body towards Mona so he could face her while he spoke now. "When I said I didn't want to be anything more than friends with Jae because I liked someone else, you know who I was talking about, right?"

Mona lifted her head when he turned to face her, feeling like she should be more attentive. His recollection of her words made her smile fondly and she narrowed her eyes, shaking her head a bit at how he'd used them against her. Finn's question, however, caught her a little more off guard. In the last few months, Mona realized how unsure of her own knowledge she could be--for school, yes, but maybe for everything. Especially after being yo-yo-ed back and forth the last few days. With a blush, she looked down at her knees again and began to ramble, "No, I don't know. . . I don't know a lot of things. I'm kind of dumb sometimes?--" she barely paused to laugh, "And I don't want to assume anything about you either. And if I did, I don't want to be selfish about it so. . ." she stopped talking in lieu of sucking on her bottom lip.

Finn shook his head and said seriously, "You're not dumb." He had just explained that he wanted to spend time with her but kept letting things get in the way, but what he failed to realize was that the biggest thing in his own way was himself. Honesty was the most important thing he could do now, not just to Mona but for himself. Butterflies started fluttering inside his stomach as Finn could smell the distinct smell of 'sweet meadow' laundry soap from the washing machine and filling the room. He finally told her, "I like you, Mona."

Mona's eyes lit up and she smiled to herself, but was still unable to look at him. She just laughed a bit and hid her face in her knees again, her feet kicking a bit. "Yeah?" she asked, the grin evident in her voice. she had her suspicions, but in a way, it was nice to hear what she thought she knew confirmed. There was some confidence in her as she finally turned to look at him, cheek still on her knee but smile still very much int act. "I like you, too, Finn!"

Finn stared at Mona with wide-eyes for a moment, processing her reaction and what she just said. Then suddenly he bursted out into laughter, laughing so much that he covered his face with both of his hands because he knew that he always turned red when he laughed like that. "Oh my God," Finn managed to say with whatever breath he had left in him. "You don't know how happy that makes me-- you don't know how happy you make me."

Mona laughed a bit and waved it off airily. her nose wrinkled, and she shook her head at him as if that couldn't be true. The more he laughed, though, the more she believed him and the more she wanted to laugh too, until she was laughing and nodding along with him. "I'm very happy right now too!" she agreed, smiling warmly at him. "I like you! I like you, i like you!" she repeated, just hoping to make him happier.

Finn rubbed out the tears welling in his eyes while taking a few breaths to help regulate his breathing from all that laughter. "Wait, that's not fair! You can't do that!" Even though he was trying to sound upset, the wide smile on his face revealed other wise. "I just said I liked you, you can't say you like me more times," he said, then started repeating, "I like you! I like you! I like you! I like you!"

Mona laughed and shook her head, taking a static sheet and rolling it into a ball before throwing it at him. "It's not a competition!" she cracked up. He was honestly so ridiculous, but she was happy to see him smiling again.

Finn flinched before he could defend himself and have the rolled up ball thrown at him. He caught it as it bounced off of him and right before it could fall down on the ground, then he put it down on the table behind him, away from Mona's reach. "Why? Because you're losing?" he teased her. "I like you! I like you! I like you!"

Mona pouted at the way he'd so easily dismissed her attack. "I am not losing if you like me!" she sneered, sticking her tongue out. When he kept repeating it she knelt up on the table and, in frustration, put her hand over his mouth. "I like you I like you I like you!" she whispered threateningly in his ear.

Finn grabbed her wrists with both hands and forced her to keep her hands over his mouth as he kept repeating the same phrase over and over again, but this time purposely using more spit as he spoke.

Mona 's eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "Ya!" she yelped, struggling to pull her arms away. she moved from her knees to the balls of her feet, crouching at first then even standing on the table as she wrestled away from him. once her arms were free she wiped it on her shirt. "You're so gross! I can't believe i still like you!"

Finn: Once freed, Finn wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his sweater. He couldn't believe she still liked him, too. "Sucks for you. What're you going to do about it?" Finn playfully taunted her as he reached for the rolled up ball of dryer sheet and threw it at her feet.

Mona glared at him, her hands on her hips. She lamely kicked the dryer sheet as she thought of retaliation. Finally, Mona raised her palm, gave it a long lick, and leaned toward him to wipe it all over his face.

Finn watched as she licked her hand and he knew what was going to happen next, but he didn't react quick enough before it happened. He closed his eyes tightly as her wet palm was wiped against his face. "You are so disgusting," Finn tried to say angrily, but he couldn't stop himself from laughing. He leaned backwards to get out of her reach and pulled his sweater over his head just enough to cover his face. "I still like you! I still like you! I still like you!"

Mona just when she thought she was triumphant, she gave a gasp of incredulity. "Stop that!" she insisted, cracking up. "I get it! I still like you too!" trying to get a glimpse of him again, she pulled on the neck of his sweater and peered down at him, her smile wide. "I like you! What are you gonna do about it!?"

Finn looked up at Mona from through his sweater. Then he slipped out from the bottom of his sweater and used the sleeves to wrap the sweater around her head.

Mona: "ya!" you could hear her yell again, her voice muffled by the fact that her head was wrapped up in his sweater. Though it was three days old, she realized he really must not have done much to dirty himself as it actually didn't smell terrible. She took another small, covert sniff, actually maybe liking the scent. She felt around for a wall, but was afraid to move from her spot in case she did a mistep and fell, so she held her arms out, hoping he'd find her. "Do i hear the laundry buzzer?" she asked through the cloth.

Finn glanced over at the washing machines, forgetting that they were even doing laundry until she reminded him. "Oh yeah," he said with a small frown. He got off the table and stood on the ground, and told her, "I'm gonna move everything to the dryer really quick and you... You stay right there."

Mona nodded, standing still with her hands folded together at her waist. She moved her head around, trying to see what she could gauge of her surroundings. The answer was nothing, and she wondered why he'd left her there like that.

Finn moved as swiftly as he could, literally throwing all the clothes from the washing machine to the dryer and tossing static sheets inside without counting. He closed the metal doors and pushed the drying machines on. "Okay. I'm gonna get you down now, okay?" Finn let her know as he reached to put his hands on her waist and carefully lifted her down from the table.

Mona kicked her legs daintily as he lifted her, as if swimming. She felt quite small when he held her, and moved her so easily. Once on the floor, it occurred to her that she could unwrap the sweater on her head herself and reached up to do so.

Finn helped her take the sweater off of her head, laughing as he unraveled the tied up sleeves that he did. "Okay, now that we know that I like you and you like me," he said. "What are we going to do about it?"

Mona grinned up at him, still bouncing on the balls of her feet. She thought it over, smoothing her hair down as she did so. "I don't know. . ." she bit her lip, wondering if all this was selfish. Still, it felt frustratingly wrong to do nothing with this knew information, especially if she was so sure about it. "I could ask you out?" she suggested, shrugging her shoulders a bit.

Finn: "You could..." Finn was starting to feel cold so he put his sweater back on. Once he was wearing it again, he rolled up his sleeves just before they reached his elbows. "And I would say yes."

Mona smiled a bit. "Then I guess I should ask you out," she laughed a bit. "Finn Oliva, under the premise that you don't treat me then street me . . . and that you don't think of me as easy," she winced a little, not wanting to rub it in but also wanting her intentions clear. "Oh--and the premise that you stop finding ways to take your shirt off in front of me and drive me crazy--because I am not easy!--do you want to go out with me? sometime?" she swayed on the spot, hoping he'd find her rambling more charming than awkward.

Finn couldn't help but laugh as he witnessed this proposal happening before him. He bit down on his lip, feeling the guilt looming back into him as she stated the first conditions, but the rest of it was ridiculous enough to make him smile again. Finn didn't even need to think about it. "Yes," he said eagerly. "I do. Yes!"

Mona she jumped up and down excitedly. "Okay, then! It's a date! I guess I'll be one of those people who makes the time to see you succeed in all your trying..." she said kindly. "How about . . . oh, I wish we could go right now!" she huffed, remembering their laundry. "How about Friday? Maybe? or Saturday? . . . or sunday? Monday is fine too," she joked.

Finn watched Mona literally jumping up and down as he felt the excitement rushing through him, too. "Thanks, Mona," he told her. "Friday sounds good to me." Then he jokingly suggested, "If that's not enough, Saturday can be a continuation? And if Saturday's not enough, Sunday will be the part three? And if Sunday is not enough, then thank God for Monday."