An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
Halfway through May, and I had reason to go through my back catalogue of around 233,000 words of Strike fic, and realized I'd written rather more masturbation than I remembered, so rather than write any more, I thought I'd share this little trilogy. The last one isn't strictly MMOM related, but if you're going to start, you might as well finish đ
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Drarry | M | 1166 words | flash fic for Merry Month of Masturbation | read on AO3
Harry couldn't concentrate in Potions. It was the dimness of the dungeon classroom, the dullness of the subject matter, and the somnolent post-lunchtime hour, yes. But it was also Draco Malfoy.
Draco Malfoy was infuriatingly adept at Potions. This had always been true. But since the war, since being formally (and very publicly) pardoned and permitted to return to Hogwarts to complete his education on a parole basis, Malfoy had become distinctly more subdued. And in the absence the obnoxious pleas for attention that had gotten under Harry's skin too many times to count, Malfoy's withdrawn composure only served to draw Harry's attention to the actual details of him instead of the general annoyance of him.
Like, today. Slughorn had them making a Shrinking Solution. Harry had heated the sliced caterpillars, added in the peeled Shrivelfig, and was waiting for the solution to simmer until it turned purple. Malfoy, working with confident efficiency, had already added the rat spleen and was now mincing his daisy roots. Harry watched as Malfoy's long fingers curled around the knife, chopping in deft strokes with a speed and dexterity that made Harry's own fingers tingle just from watching. It was only slicing up flower stems, for Merlin's sake, but Mafloy's brisk movements displayed such casual competency that Harry couldn't help but be impressed, continually sneaking glances over to Malfoy's table.
Malfoy didn't raise his hand to answer questions anymore, but Harry saw how he was always two steps ahead of whatever instructions or guidance Slughorn was giving the class. Half-listening to Slughorn, Harry would watch Malfoy scribble notes in the margins of his textbook, mouthing answers to himself without looking up from his work. It always made Harry feel funny, a twist of something like envy but far softer, more reverent, churning in his gut. Mostly, he kept this feeling locked tight in the dark depths of his belly.
And, his hair. Malfoy had abandoned the long, slicked-back style that had been his signatureâabout which, Harry had hypotheses that involved Malfoy no longer wanting to emulate his father's slick ponytail, nor draw a visual link that would remind people of how close he had been to following his father's footsteps all the way to Azkaban. Malfoy now wore his hair close-cropped, almost buzzed. The cut accentuated his sharp features, the fine bones of his face and high slope of his cheekbones. It had grown out a little since the school year started, and the heat from his cauldron was causing the fine hairs at the nape of his neck to curl. A sheen of perspiration shimmered on his pale skin.
Harry shifted in his seat, tried to return his attention to his now gurgling cauldronâwell past a low simmer, that would cost himâto focus his eyes on the next step in his Potions book. The letters seemed blurry. He blamed the hot fumes that were raising a sweat on his forehead. He wiped at it with the back of his hand, pushing Malfoy's thin, nimble fingers from his mind.
Twenty minutes later, it was over. They transferred a ladle-full of their Solutions to phials and deposited their samples at Slughorn's desk. Harry approached the desk as Malfoy was handing over his sample. Slughorn took it from him, holding it up to catch the wan light filtering through the tiny dungeon windows.
"Excellent work, Mr. Malfoy," Slughorn said. "A perfect emerald green hue. I have no doubt this could shrink a hippogriff to the size of a newborn kneazle."
Instinctively, Harry waited for the haughty remark. For Malfoy to turn around and deplore Harry's own muddy green sample, clearly burned and useless. No forthcoming comment came. Harry stared at the back of Malfoy's neck and saw a faint blush creeping up toward his hairline. Malfoy's hair was so blonde, Harry imagined it turning pink when Malfoy became fully flushed, from embarrassment or anger or â
"Thank you, professor." Malfoy inclined his head toward Slughorn, then excused himself and returned to his desk, where he quickly packed up his bag and departed. Harry ignored a restlessness in his feet that compelled him to follow. Those days were behind him.
Harry crossed paths with Hermione and Ron outside the Great Hall.
"We thought we'd go down to the lake," Hermione greeted him. "Enjoy the weather while it lasts."
"Seamus brought a football from home," said Ron excitedly. "He's going to teach us how to play."
"Um," stalled Harry, who was still feeling fidgety after his time in the dungeons. "I'm feeling a bit tired. Think I'll just run upstairs for a quick nap before dinner."
Hermione's brows knit, but she nodded. "See you later, then."
As they walked away, Ron swung an arm around her shoulders and tugged her into his side.
On his way back to the eighth year tower, Harry stopped in the bathroom to splash his face with cold water. He closed his eyes and leaned over the sink. He saw a flush fanning over a pale chest, up a long, elegant neck toward â he shook his head to dispel the image before it could go any further. It was replaced by thin fingers, curling around â
Harry groaned, frustrated. The semi he'd been ignoring since Potions was swelling with the force of the blood pumping through his body. Harry turned and entered a stall, closing the door roughly behind him and tossing a locking charm toward the door to the bathroom. He propped one hand against the wall, standing over the toilet, and used the other hand to push his robes open and tug his zipper down. His fingers brushed against his cock, stiff against the seam of his boxers, and he exhaled sharply, "Fuck."
He gave in, pulled his cock out and gave it couple quick strokes. He rubbed the pad of his thumb across the head, gathering the pre-cum there and slicking it down the shaft. Letting go briefly, he raised his hand to his mouth and gave it a few licks. His lube was by his bedside (where normal sexual activity belonged) so spit would have to do. He gripped himself at the base and gave a firm squeeze before sliding up to the tip and settling into a rhythm.
As he stroked himself, he kept his mind carefully blank, thinking of nothing but the chafe of his calloused palm against the sensitive skin of his cock, of the pleasure spreading beneath his skin, tingling and pulling his muscles taught, his heart beating hard and fast in his chest. After all, it was only a physical urge, a necessary release after a too-long afternoon cooped up in the dungeons. It didn't mean anything about anything.
His hand was moving faster now, his balls tightening on the precipice of his orgasm. An image flashed behind his eyes of sharp cheekbones blotched pink, soft lips gaping open, eyes closed â
The tension released, come spilling over onto his hand, and Harry's mind finally went completely, blessedly blank.
Rating: Mature
Universe: Avengers Assemble
Pairings: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Characters: Clint Barton, Natasha Romanoff, Steve Rogers, Tony Stark
Warnings:Â Swearing, Implied Sexual Content
Major Tags:Â Pre-Relationship, Attempt at Humour, Pre-Slash, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Word count:Â 714
Summery:Â Nat and Clint gossip about their team leader's relationship over morning coffee.
For the:
⌠Merry Month of Mast*rbation 2019
Read below or on AO3 >HERE<
Clint looked at the scene before him and wondered how he could escape unnoticed. A glance over to Nat showed that she would be of no help. If anything she seemed all too happy to watch this unfold.
He scowls at her over his coffee. She could actually fix this real fast, but she wonât, Clint knows that. The least she could do was direct them out of the kitchen. âŚitâs not like anyone eats here or anything. No, everyone loves having their breakfast ruined by this nonsense. It was way too early for this. He hadnât even finished his first cup of coffee yet. Clint sighs and receives a kick to the shin for his troubles.
Steve and Tony were arguing again. Something happened between last night and this morning, what it was he wouldnât be able to guess. Steve had been aloof and grumpy even after his morning run. And when Tony had entered the kitchen all hell broke loose.
She leans in closer to him, not taking her eyes off the scene before them. Clint moves in closer out of habit. âYou keep saying you wish they just get there shit together. This might be itâ She whispers to him.
Clint scoffs. He was beginning to doubt that Steve and Tony would ever work things out between them. With how they seem to deal with things, they would all be retired by the time they workout their personal relationship. On the field Captain America and Iron Man worked seamlessly, off duty it was as much a gamble as the weather.
âYou know you could help them out. All your training... This would be a walk in the park.â He argued. He knew Nat wouldnât intervene. She could sort those two idiots out in no time at all, but no, sheâd rather watch this mess.
âThis is far more satisfying.â She says, smirking at him.
âIn what way is this satisfying?â he says, his voice raising in frustration. Nat gives him a look. âThis is what TV is for anywayâ
âYour TV programs are repetitive and dullâ Nat says.
Clint stifles his groan. âI know its crap. TV is crap! Thatâs what TV is for. No one wants this bull in their kitchenâ he says, gesturing to their âLeadersâ.
She rolls her eyes at him. âYou could leave.â She says âIâd doubt they would care⌠or noticeâ
âItâs the same old stick, Nat. Every time it is the same. What makes you think this time would be any different? What makes you think this would be âitâ?â
Nat sends him a look, judging him. âIf you would listenâŚâ
He runs his free hand over his face. âWould rather not have to bleach my brains, thanksâ he says. This was the stuff he tried to avoid getting involved in.
She shakes her head at him. âTony walked in on Steve waxing his gunâ she explains.
Clint looks over to the two men arguing just outside of the kitchen. âShit. No wayâ
Her lips curl up in a smile. âYeah.â She says, âAnd Tony is try-âŚâ
He cuts in eagerly, â-trying to figure out who Steve was saluting to? And without-â This was unbelievable⌠and something he could see happening between the two guys.
She cuts back in over him, just as eager â-Without letting Steve know he has a huge thing for him, and appearing as if he doesnât care either wayâ
âAnd Steve is embarrassed of course.â He adds, unable to keep his own smile off his face now. "And not happy about Tony getting further into his business"
âOf course.â She says.
Clint sets his coffee cup onto the counter, continuing â⌠and so he is shutting himself off emotionallyâ
Nat hums in agreement.
âAnd TonyâŚâ He says.
She gives a quiet laugh. ââŚTrying to act like it doesnât affect him, Steve closing himself off, but it doesâ
âOkay. Iâll pay that this is better than my showsâ he says.
They watch their leaders argue back and forth in silence.
Clint turns to Nat. âHow did you know Tony caught Steve rubbing one out?â he asks.
âIt was quite a scene. I donât know how you missed itâ Nat says.
âItâs all go around here, isnât it?â He mutters to himself.
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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Future Man (TV)
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Josh Futterman | Future Man
Additional Tags: Merry Month of Masturbation Challenge, community: mmom, Crack, but this whole show is crack?
Summary:
Josh is horny but not all his anatomy is, strictly speaking, his own.
My goal was 15 (fewer than previous years) and I met that so I'm happy.
Fandoms: Deadpool, A Million Ways to Die in the West, The Orville, Legends of Tomorrow, Constantine, Killjoys, Future Man, Will, Murdoch Mysteries, Black Sails, The Borgias, Revenge
List of fills:
Movies
Can't Get the Staff (260 words)
Fandom: Deadpool (Movieverse)
Summary: Deadpool discusses being Canadian and enjoying wanking. Crack flash fic for mmom (Merry Month of Masturbation)
Emptyin' the Saloon (270 words)
Fandom: A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)
Summary: Of all the ways to die in the west, could masturbating be one of them?
The Orville
Humans Are Complicated (212 words)
Summary: Isaac gathers data on human sexuality and learns about masturbation.
It's Not His Nose? (355 words)
Summary: More interspecies miscommunication cause problems for Gordon in particular, and Ed and Kelly as his commanding officers.
DCEU/ArrowverseÂ
Vital Ingredient (530 words)
Fandom: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Summary: The team are helping John make a potion. There's one particular ingredient that will require some self-pleasure. John is a shameless flirt and Ray is taken aback.
Answering the Devil's Doorbell (558 words)
Fandom: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Summary: Sara finds too much self-pleasure summons the Devil, but summoning a sexy woman to your quarters isn't necessarily a bad thing. Inspired by a comment on a previous mmom fic (see notes)
Judgemental Angelic Voyeurism (407 words)
Fandom: Constantine (TV)
Summary: After a long day all John wants is a hot shower and good wank, but privacy is hard to come by when an angel has his eye on you.
Misc TV
Girls Want To Have Five Minutes For Themselves (172 words)
Fandom: Killjoys (TV)
Summary: Is five minutes to herself too much for Dutch to ask for?
Philosophical Musings on Masturbation (184 words)
Fandom: Future Man (TV)
Summary: Josh is horny but not all his anatomy is, strictly speaking, his own.
Traffic With Thy Self Alone (255 words)
Fandom: Will (TV 2017)
Summary: Will has a bet with Richard on how many innuendos he can work into his next play. Kit is amused - and in one-sided love with the bard.
What The Future May Bring (1534 words)
Fandom: Murdoch Mysteries
Summary: Watts goes to Julia to discuss sexual fantasises about a particular person. Julia is a good listener and supportive friend.
Immoral and Impure (745 words)
Fandom: Black Sails Series: Part 6 of The Odd Trio
Summary: Modern AU. Billy returns from a meeting with a fellow asexual, angry at being told he isn't pure enough to be a 'good' asexual what with the drinking, swearing, and, horror of horrors, masturbating.
At Her Mercy (603 words)
Fandom: The Borgias (Showtime TV)
Summary: Lucrezia wants to watch â and control â Cesare as he masturbates.
Always a Nolan and Emily (1661 words)
Fandom: Revenge (TV)
Summary: Post-canon. Alone and lonely, Nolan is indulging in some solo morning delight when the object of his fantasy shows up in person.