#missyoueverysecond

Before this year, I never really knew how hard it was to know someone with cancer. I never knew how hard it was to live everyday wondering when the cancer would go away. This year, whenever I hear the word cancer, I start shivering. Whenever I hear something about death, I feel like crying in a corner. I used to not care about death cause no one close to me passed away. But this year, ever since that one day, I wake up and go to sleep in tears, wishing it was all a nightmare. I keep seeing a picture in my head of her lying on the hospital bed with no movement or any reaction at all. This year I have faced my biggest fear of life, loosing someone I never thought I would loose. Til this day I wake up thinking it's February 5, 2014 again.