SEND ME 🤍 + A SHIP AND I’LL TELL YOU…
who cooks meals for the other?
holden, because he insists on doing so. he has strong opinions about food preparation and even stronger opinions about taking care of people through sustenance. he just shows up at lysa's with groceries he's already got at the farmer's market, or has something warming on the stove before lysa's even taken their shoes off. lysa gets assigned simple jobs, including kissing the cook and taste-testing the simmering meal.
who spams the other with memes?
lysa, not that holden appreciates most of it. holden is not a reliable texter, so the meme spamming is more of a one-way street communication. he does not understand why a wolf and a cat cuddling is very 'them' and does not wish to find out. when he actually finds something funny, he calls lysa instead of texting back, if only to explain why the meme is factually incorrect, or to grudgingly admit it made him laugh.
who likes to tidy around the house?
holden. it's instinctual, he can't help it. everything in his home has a function and a specific place; lysa probably learned early not to disturb his systems.
who likes to play pranks on the other?
lysa. it begins as simple office hijinks: changing his phone background to a photo of dr. parrishell, putting googly eyes on his monitor, switching his mug. holden huffs and holds his tongue, not allowing them the satisfaction of an emotional response. he's patient, waiting for the perfect moment, and then replaces lysa's laptop wallpaper with a photo of his face at extreme close-up, days later, which he considers an appropriate counterattack.
who asked the other to move in with them?
neither, honestly. lysa would jokes about leaving their stuff at holden's place, and his brain would short-circuit. he thinks it's practical for lysa to stay the nights they have an early internship shift at the clinic, but would bite his own tongue off before saying, move in.
who is in charge of the music during a car ride?
it's a shared act. holden has ideas on what is acceptable road music. if he had his way, it'd be blues and folk rock all the time; lysa hijacks the aux and keeps sneaking in playlists whenever they commute together. he finds himself humming along to their song recs more times than he can count.
who is more likely to tickle the other mercilessly?
lysa. holden would rather die than admit he's ticklish; they find out once and weaponize it irresponsibly. he retaliates not with tickling but with the most effective possible weapon: catching lysa's wrists, holding them still, and finishing what they started (much to their delight).
who needs to hold the other during scary movies?
likely lysa. horror does not faze holden. lysa could migrate incrementally toward holden's side of the couch, ending up halfway on holden's lap by the middle of the film, which he doesn't mind.
who has to help the other when it comes to technology?
lysa. holden still writes everything by hand, too stubborn to learn the clinic scheduling software. lysa is the one who trains him on how to use it without being condescending; he still barely uses it on a regular basis.
who likes to get a bit frisky in public / an inappropriate setting?
it's a mixture of both: holden is the one locking the office door, tugging lysa into a dark hallway, kissing them breathless in his car. lysa eggs him on with lingering touches in semi-public and then blushes the hardest when holden retaliates. it's a war neither one of them can win.
who wakes up first, and do they wake up the other or let them rest?
holden. he's up before dawn out of habit and has breakfast ready before lysa wakes on the rare times they spend the night. he'll only wake them if they've begged him the night before not to let them oversleep.
who is always taking pictures of the other when they aren’t looking?
lysa, undoubtedly. they collect little candid snapshots: holden reading with his glasses low on his nose, holden frowning at a crossword, holden cooking with oliver at his feet. a few of them are his favorites he's ever seen of himself. holden allows exactly one photo be his own phone lockscreen (with lysa's assistance).
who always forgets their wallet and never ends up paying for anything?
lysa forgets occasionally. holden pays without comment, as if there was never another option. holden gets a lysa a cardholder for their birthday and lysa gets to pay him back in more efficient ways: new mugs, more memes, and planning the next date.
who can’t sleep because the other snores or moves too much at night?
holden—though he already sleeps lightly because of nightmares, not because of lysa. if lysa shifts closer, he wakes, but he doesn't move away. he just adjusts his arm around them and pretends he was asleep the whole time.
who is better at video games, and do they let the other win or show no mercy?
lysa, and it isn't even close. holden is not great at video games for many reasons: he will not accept help, he will not read tutorials, he will lose twelve times in a row and refuse to take any pity wins. he encourages lysa to show no mercy, because that's the only way he'll learn. he eventually gets decent at exactly one game and holds this over lysa forever.
who always gets up in the middle of the night to use the restroom and accidentally wakes up the other?
lysa's bladder might tap out first between the two. holden always stirs, checks the time, then waits for his favorite sprawler to return with open arms.