#michellen

Just a few more steps. Michael had made it up the fire escape stairs without making them creak, gotten through the window without knocking over a single succulent, and had navigated the entire apartment to their bedroom without stubbing their toe once. The door had mercy on them and refrained from squeaking for the first time in a year. Then Lou Ellen wrecked their dreams of sneaking into bed at two am a step away from the finish line.

“If you steal the blankets, I’m putting my cold feet on you.”

They gulped, “I didn’t think you would be awake..”

She lifted the comforter and motioned for them to get into bed, “Hurry up, I’m getting cold.”

They sighed softly in relief and crawled onto the mattress next to Lou. Michael wrapped their arms around her and snuggled close and Lou dropped the blankets over their face. They huffed against her neck but obviously had no plans on moving anytime soon, and if anything hugged her tighter.

“Where were you,” she grumbled, “It got cold without you.”

Michael winced, “Sorry. Lee called.”

“Is he ok?”

“He had a few too many at a gig and needed me to get him home.”

She ran her fingers through their hair and pressed her freezing toes against their shins. Then she frowned and kicked him.

“Get the hell out of bed and take your pants off.”

Michael smirked, “Isn’t it a little late for make up sex?”

Lou groaned, “Get your damn jeans off, stupid, or I’ll make you sleep on the couch!”

“You gonna make me?”

Lou Ellen pushed at their shoulder then turned away onto her other side.

“No, come back!”

“Take your pants off, I refuse to cuddle with your jeans chafing my thighs.”

Michael poked at her mid back several times, she continued to ignore them. They pressed their forehead against her shoulder and attempted the kiss her. She scooted away, “Nope, not happening.”

“But it’s cold,” they whined.

“It’s what you get for sneaking out and scaring the shit out of me.”

“…I’m sorry.”

Lou shrugged, “Well, you weren’t cheating on me-”

“I would never!”

“I know, Mike. And you’re safe, and you’re not drunk, so..”

Lou Ellen stayed on a silent pause for an agonizing long time. Finally, Michael nudged her shoulder and broke the silence, “So?”

“Take off the jeans and I’ll forgive you.”

Pairing: Michael Yew/Lou Ellen

“And another thing! Who the fuck ever orders anchovies on pizza? How could this mistake even happen? Listen here dickfuck, it took you thirty nine minutes to get here, so not only am I leaving a bad review, I’m not paying for this! You can forget it!”

Lou Ellen slammed the door in the pizza boy’s face, then stood there huffing and puffing. Anchovies! Instead of pepperoni! Who does that? Lou grumbled about it as she walked off to the kitchen and threw the box in the trash. She’d have to take it out before it started stinking up the house, but postponed that in favor of making a call to a different pizza place. Maybe they could get her order right.

After she’d placed a new order for pepperoni with white sauce, Lou called up the other pizza place and asked for the manager. They hated being a suburban mom about this, but messing up this bad was just uncalled for. A bit ridiculous really. It was actually a bit exhilarating, she thought as she started ranting again, this time to someone who could actually do something about it. Lou had never exercised the customer was always right rule before. It gave them a weird feeling of power

Michael stood on the porch, stunned, as the person inside complained loudly to his manager on the phone. The first day on the job and he was probably already fired. It wasn’t fair, Percy was the one who cooked the wrong order! How was he supposed to know there was something screwed up?

When he’d gone into delivery, he’d figured it would be easy money. Just drive some pizzas around, big deal! The person training him had said as much. Michael certainly hadn’t expected the college frat boys from hell, or the elderly lady who gave him a ten cent tip, or even the sleepover with the twelve year old who’d almost puked on his shoes. He absolutely hadn’t expected the dark skinned cutie-turned-white suburban mom.

Michael was so overwhelmed, he couldn’t help it. He sniffled, and he tried to blink them back but tears came to his eyes anyway. He sat down, defeated, on this girl’s porch and hoped they didn’t call the cops on him. Maybe they would. Maybe he could add “arrested for trespassing” to his list of fuck ups for tonight. Michael balled up his uniform hat and threw it towards the street, then sniffled again.

Lou paused in her tirade when they heard a sound coming from their door. They hung up mid-rant, maybe the pizza was already here. Opening the door, however, only revealed a dejected looking delivery boy sniffling on their doorstep. The brunet was staring at the ground, tears in his big brown eyes. All of the adrenaline faded away, leaving behind a nagging guilt in the pit of Lou’s empty stomach.

“Hey,” they said, touching his shoulder lightly to get his attention.

“What do you want?” he snapped, sounding congested. Lou Ellen sat down beside him on the steps.

“I’m sorry for being such a prick.”

Michael shrugged, “At least you didn’t puke on me.”

Lou snorted, “Well, I’m still sorry for making what seems like a shitty enough night worse. It wasn’t your fault I got the wrong order.”

Michael sniffed and wiped his nose on his sleeve. Lou Ellen patted his shoulder comfortingly.

“Am I fired?”

Lou winced, “Yeah...probably. I’m sorry about that too.”

He sighed, burying his head in his hands, “My dad’s gonna kill me…”

Lou rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly. Both of them stayed like that until the new pizza guy rolled up and delivered a perfect order of pepperoni. Lou Ellen awkwardly accepted it and payed him. The guy shot a sympathetic look to Michael as he left. She sat there for another minute with the pizza in her lap.

“So…” Lou started.

“So.” Michael said back.

“Since you’re already fired…”

“Because of you.” he said, looking up at her.

Lou Ellen winced, “Yes, because of me, you’re already fired, so do you want to go and shut your car off then join me for some pizza?”

Lou Ellen really didn’t know what to do. 

She just wanted to listen to Adel in her car where their roommate wouldn’t complain, and go get some chocolate at the drug store. 

When they watched some, probably drunk, short guy wander up to their car, they got nervous. When he started to pee on their car, they could only think of one thing to do. They turned the radio up as high as it would go, and opened the window he was standing at. Lou Ellen really knew how to say hello from the inside. 

The man drunkenly stumbled away, apparently not realizing there had been someone in the car. 

Still in shock that that had even happened, Lou thought it was best to probably just drive away. 

The next day, Lou Ellen was working back stage at the drama club, getting into costume. “Hey Lou,” her friend Cicil said, “the school paper wants an interview,” 

“Sure, let them in,” they said, putting the top hat on. 

When the reporter walked in, Lou Ellen nearly lost her mind. “You peed on my car!” They yelled. 

The reporter was definitely the same guy, Lou recognized the hight. His eyes widened, recognizing them right back. 

“Oh my god, you’re Adel!” 

“No, actually, but I’m flattered. Want to explain to me why you peed on my car last night?” 

“Uh...” He looked nervous, like he was usually the one asking the questions, “I was drinking,” 

“Obviously,” 

“And had to pee,”

“Obviously,”  

“I’m sorry.” He said. “Can we do the interview fast and make this way less awkward for the both of us?” 

Lou sat down, “Sure, I’m Lou Ellen,” 

“Michael,” He held out his hand, and they shook it hesitantly. “Uh so...”

Even though he only asked maybe fifteen questions, it was still the longest ten minutes of their life. 

Finally Michael looked up from his tape recorder. “Well that should be good, thank you for the interview, I look forward to the show.” 

He was about to walk out when Lou called to him. “You know, the leading actor parks behind the theater building, if you have to pee more.” 

Lou Ellen really didn’t mind loving a Catholic boy. Sure, they didn’t really get the whole three-days-in-hell thing, or the being born next to a bunch of animal’s thing, but they really didn’t mind their boyfriend’s beliefs. Until he insisted on bringing a dead tree into their apartment that was taller than him.

“Do you think you can use magic to get this up the stairs?” Michael asked, standing next to the five foot tree.

“I mean, I can, but it’s not my holiday, so I’d kind of like to see you try and move it up stairs.” They joked.

Michael pouted, knowing he could never actually move it up the stairs on his own. And Jesus usually didn’t get back on his prayers that fast. And he wasn’t going to ask his dad for help unless he wanted a thousand haikus on trees. “But Christmas trees are technically a pagan tradition.” That was the only defense he could come up with. Maybe he could convince them that Christmas trees were actually Hindu.

“Nice try, they’re European pagan. That’s still you. This is not only a tradition for your Irish Catholic-ness, but also for your Irish pagan ancestors.” They pointed out, looking at wreaths.

He walked up behind them and rested his head on their shoulder. “Come on, help me out. I do all the stuff for your holidays. That henna tattoo did not come off for weeks.”

Lou Ellen smiled, “Get the tree, shrimp, of course I’ll help you.” Michael smiled. “Besides, if I didn’t help you with the tree, where would we put the Krishna ornament?”

Mitchell fucking rocked that skirt. 

Mark and Jake went as Treasure Planet version Jim Hawkins and younger! John Silver.