#mhadani

Hilovely :)

I’msorry to hear that this is something you’ve been struggling with, but reallyglad that you want to try and work on it! Self-esteem and confidence aredefinitely things I have struggled with myself and something that I’mconstantly trying to improve! I do have some tips that I’ve found helpful sofar, that may be beneficial for you too!:

Professionalhelp – I would really recommend seeking professional help if you are constantlystruggling from low self-esteem, as they will be able to help you find the rootcause of any negative thoughts and work on them from there, as digging thingsout at the root stops them from growing back and it’s the same with thoughtprocesses too! We have a page here and a video here on gettinghelp that I’d really recommend taking a look at!

Talkingto someone – if professional help isn’t quite possible for you, confiding insomeone you’re close to when you’re struggling can also be really beneficial inhelping you remember that there are people out there who care about you andlove you, and therefore you are definitely lovable, even by yourself!

Dothings you enjoy – spending time doing things that makes you happy is awonderful form of self-love! Other things that can help you feel more positiveabout yourself are doing things you’re talented at (whether that’s drawing,baking, singing, sport, writing, makeup, or whatever!), as well as things thatmake you feel better about yourself, like volunteering.

Hobbies– I often feel unconfident because I don’t feel like I have any talents, and ifyou feel the same it can be a really good idea to try something new andchallenge yourself, because you never know what you might be good at! You cando things at home, like crafting or finding lessons/tutorials/classes aboutpretty much anything online, or look to see if there are any clubs or classesnear you that you may be interested in joining!

Takecare of yourself – one of the best forms of self-love is making sure you’redoing important daily tasks, such as eating or drinking enough, getting enoughsleep, taking care of personal hygiene, etc. But also pampering yourself if you’vebeen having a rough time! Personally I like to take a bath, do a facemask,paint my nails and getting into comfy pyjamas to watch a film!

Buildpositive relationships – surround yourself with people who make you happy; whoyou’re comfortable being around and are supportive of you. Being caring andsupportive towards others can also help you feel better about yourself too.

Beassertive – try to tell people if they’ve upset you and explain how you feel,say no to things you don’t want to do and try to put your health and happinessfirst always.

Identifyand challenge negative beliefs – for example, if you think that no one likesyou, try to think of all the times you spent and enjoyed with people you loveto help remind you otherwise.

Focuson the positives! – think of all the things you like about yourself,personality and appearance wise. You can write them down and read them wheneveryou’re feeling low and maybe even stick them on post-it notes to have aroundyour room for a constant reminder.

Keepinga diary – this could help you sort out your thoughts and feeling about yourselfand understand them and where they’re coming from a bit better.

Thoseare all my tips, but I also really like thispage by Mind for some more advice! And if you’re looking for any tips onimproving confidence related to body image, we have a page about that here!

Ihope you’re doing okay and that this was able to help you at all! Pleaseremember that we’re always here if you ever need anything else!

Keepfighting!

Takecare and lots of love,

Hi lovely :)

I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through a hardtime at the moment, sweetheart! I just want to let you know that here we don’tthink you’re horrible or crazy or anything like that, okay? There isn’t anythingwrong with wanting attention; every human needs to have at least one person whodoes pay them attention, listens to them and supports them when they’re goingthrough rough times. When you don’t feel like you’re getting those things, itcan unfortunately make you feel like you need to go to drastic measures to tryand make someone care! You aren’t alone. Everyone has done things they aren’tproud of, and a lot of the time these things start to spiral out of control, butthe important thing is that you have realised what you’re doing is wrong, andalthough it may feel out of your hands right now I promise you that you are incontrol of this and you can put a stop to it.

I think that coming clean to your friends, explainingeverything and being honest about why you started could be good for you to getit off of your chest. They might be upset to start with, but hopefully if theyare good enough friends they will understand that you were just going through ahard time and made a mistake. However, I completely get that this might soundterrifying right now and of course you don’t have to tell them anything. Like Isaid, you are in control of this situation and you don’t have to do anythingyou’re uncomfortable with.

If you don’t feel like you could tell your friends the truthabout what’s been going on, then I would recommend just completely stoppingyourself from sending anything anonymous to yourself or anyone else. Yourfriends might think it’s weird that they suddenly stopped, but I don’t thinkthey’d find it suspicious and they will eventually move on from it. This may beeasier said than done though, so try to set yourself little targets! Try to goa whole day without sending anything, and then maybe a whole week and keepbuilding it up and up until you’re able to see that you weren’t achievinganything positive by sending those messages. Maybe try deleting any accounts orapps that you would use to send the messages from to make it a little easierfor yourself.

I’d also try finding other ways to bond with your friendsand get their attention in more positive ways! Maybe you can suggest doing morethings together and spending more time with them doing things you enjoy. If youare still craving attention from someone, please don’t be afraid to reach outto them. Be honest with them if you’re going through a rough time or arefeeling lonely and need someone to talk to. There isn’t anything wrong withdoing that at all. It may also be beneficial for you to reach out to someoneprofessional if you are really struggling, such as a doctor, teacher, schoolcounsellor, etc.

I hope you are doing okay, lovely. Please remember that we’realways here for you if you ever need anything else!

Keep fighting!

Take care and lots of love,

Hi lovely :)

First of all I just want to start out by sayingthat I am not a professional at all so I can’t be sure that this is 100%correct, all information is based purely off of personal experience andresearch!

You are right that depersonalisation andderealisation are both types of dissociation! There are definitely differentways to dissociate and dissociation can vary completely between people aseveryone experiences it totally differently. Depersonalisation andderealisation also aren’t the only types of dissociation, so if you’d like tolearn a bit more about other types I would really recommend having a look at thispage by Mind!

The difference between depersonalisation andderealisation depends mainly on what you are feeling when you dissociate.Depersonalisation is when you feel as though you aren’t real, and can include,but is not limited to, symptoms such as out of body experiences, loss offeeling in parts of your body, distorted views of your body, being unable torecognise yourself in a mirror, feeling detached from your emotions, feelingsof being unreal, feeling like you don’t know who you are, etc. On the otherhand, derealisation is where you feel as though the world around you isn’treal. Again, this can include, but is not limited to, symptoms such as feelingdetached from the world, feeling places you are often in are unfamiliar,feeling that people you know are strangers, seeing objects change shape, colouror size, etc.

I hope that this makes sense and is able to helpyou at all! If you need anything else don’t hesitate to message us again!

Keep fighting!

Take care and lots of love,

HiNS :)

I’msorry to hear that this is something you’re going through, lovely! This doessound like a really difficult situation to be in. I’m also sorry that we maynot have answered in time! If we didn’t I hope that it did go okay!

Idon’t think you’re overreacting at all! While it is possible that you may havemisunderstood his facial expression, it is also so important to trust your instincts,especially when it comes to things that make you feel uncomfortable in any way.I have a customer at my job who can also act/look at me inappropriately and itmakes me feel very awkward and uncomfortable, so I can completely understandwhere you’re coming from and you’re definitely doing the right thing by beingcautious!

Somethingthat has helped me with the customer is to let the people I work with know what’sgoing on and how he’s made me feel so that they’re aware of what is going on.This makes me feel a bit more comfortable because if I ever do feelparticularly awkward around him, I know I can go and speak to someone elseabout it. This may be a more difficult thing to do considering it is family andsometimes it is harder for people to believe someone they’re close to may be actinginappropriately, but I still think it is important to try and bring it up tosomeone you trust, just so that they’re aware of how you’re feeling and canalso keep an extra eye on him.

Tryingto always have someone with you when you’re around your uncle may also help youfeel a bit more settled, even if those people aren’t aware of you feelinguncomfortable, as he’s less likely to act inappropriately or do something thatclearly makes you uncomfortable if there are other witnesses. I always makesure I have a co-worker with me whenever my ‘creepy guy’ (as I refer to him!)comes into my work, and I have found that he tends to tone down hisinappropriate remarks/actions whenever someone else is around.

Ultimatelyif he does continue to make you feel awkward or uncomfortable in any way you don’thave to spend time with him, lovely. I do understand that it’s more difficultwhen it’s family, but if you can tell someone, such as your parents, what’sgoing on they may be less likely to force you to see him, or maybe come up withexcuses, like staying at a friend’s house, as to why you won’t be about if heever comes to visit! At the end of the day your happiness and comfort has tocome first, and you shouldn’t spend your time around people who make you feelon edge in any way.

Ihope you’re doing okay, lovely! Please remember that we’re always here if youever need anything else!

Keepfighting!

Takecare and lots of love,

Hi lovely! :)

Oh my goodness, well it’s completely made my day to read this! You’re so kind, thank you so so much! 

I hope you’re doing okay!

Take care and lots of love,

Hi lovely :)

Aww thank you so much! This really made me smile to read! You’re super sweet and thank you so much again! :D

Keep fighting!

Take care and lots of love,