Chalkos was a hot, richly green and blue garden world, in a perpetual spinning dance with it's barren twin, Selvos. Unlike Selvos, Chalkos had been home to roughly 5,000 people. Today though, each planet had something in common, as roughly half their surface area was either blackened and scorched, or still actively on fire.Â
Council Spectre Kaidan Alenko stood in the small cockpit that doubled as their pilot's personal quarters and stared out the windows at the devastation below. This was not Earth, he reminded himself, even as his fists clenched reflexively and sweat beaded on his brow. His father's ashes were not among the dead. His mother was not down there to save. The victims down below had all been real people, with rich full lives, but he'd known none of them by name.Â
Pretending that truth made genocide easier to bear, Kaidan reached down deep and pulled up the emotional walls all his years as a soldier had built, brick by brick. If the reapers hadn't broken him when they were alive, he certainly wouldn't let them do it now that they were dead.Â
"Joker," he called, sliding into the co-pilot's seat next to his friend. "Let's scan for life signs first, just to be sure."Â
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MSV - Invictus floor plan of crew deck. The five small square rooms are 20x20 with the large one in the center being 50x50. It is a converted merchant vessel. To see the floor plan in it's entirety, please go here.
From Left to right:
- back tip is the airlock, for docking with other ships and space stations.
- Above the airlock is the Invictus's unique drive core, with a raised balcony all the way around it and two access ladders on either side. A hammock for Tana, the lovely pink volus engineer, can be seen in the top right corner.
- Below the airlock is the armory, with a tool bench for customization, lockers for gear, shelves for storage, and an access ladder to reach the small garage on the deck below. . A small, all terrain ground vehicle is housed in the garage.
- Right of the airlock and down the hall is a large 50x50 room divided up into five open sections: Â
1) TOP LEFT -  workout/fitness area with (from left to right) a treadmill with a vid screen on the wall, an arm machine, a leg machine, free weights and bench and a water cooler. The blue mats are for wrestling, stretching, and "dancing." A chin up bar is on the wall above the mats.Â
2) TOP RIGHT -  "The Mess," or kitchen and eating area. As well as housing all the standard appliances (fridge, freezer, stove, oven, microwave, dishwasher, clothes washer/dryer, and ration rehydrator), there are also two large tables for eating and crew meetings.
3) BOTTOM RIGHT- As thereis no bridge, per say, this main living area doubles as a secondary command center, when crew members are not in the cockpit.  The coffee table is also a large data pad/computer console that activates the vid screen on the wall. This area can be used for anything from watching movies and playing video games, to scanning planets, vid conferences with the council, and planning their next mission. The seating is all second hand, but in good condition and very comfortable.
4) BOTTOM CENTER - Â Â Entertainment area with a pool table, card table, and dart board (electronic of course, we don't want any pointy objects in space - except bullets and omniblades).
5) BOTTOM LEFT - Communal office space with two computer work stations and above that is a bookshelf for data pads and such. Perfect for getting reports done, or just writing a message home to family.  Â
- To the right of the large main room is a hallway. Directly above the hallway is a storage room on the left and the computer core for the whole ship is on the right.
- Above the storage room and computer core is another 20x20 room. This is the Captains Cabin that Gabby and Kaidan share. They have a small bathroom with a shower in the top right corner. You an also see their large bed, fishtank, (because it didn't feel right without one), a cage for Boo the genetically enhanced Space Hamster, wardrobes, dressers, a sofa, and a little office nook for Spectre business.  They have a large window at the head of their bed. Gabby's piano emulator sits on top of the bed in this picture (but is usually stored under it).Â
- Below the hallway to the right of the large open living space is the crew/passenger shower room on the left and the crew/passenger toilets on the right.Â
- below the shower room and toilets is the crew/passenger bedroom. It has three sets of bunk beds (two beds each), one of which is extra large and sturdy to accommodate the occasional Krogan passenger. There are also sofas, wardrobes, tables with chairs, end tables, lamps, and a large window.Â
- The diamond shaped room all the way to the right is the cockpit, which also serves as Joker's quarters. The right most tip is mostly all windows with the pilots and co-pilots chairs.. Joker has a single bed with a small bookshelf at the foot of it and a foot stool for relaxing. He also has a wardrobe, vid screen and his guitar.
The Invictus was as ready as she'd ever be, without a stop at Ilium or one of the other minimally damaged colonies. She'd been tuned up, shined, and outfitted beyond even Kaidan's wildest dreams when they'd started this venture. She was a fine ship.
As simple as the first few missions were designed to be, it would still be months before he, Gabby, and Joker set foot back on the Citadel. Most everything had been prepared for their journey, but Kaidan still had a promise to keep.Â
Most of the children in the clinic Kaidan had informally adopted as his pet project were recovered well enough to be relocated. Many of them had been, courtesy of the c-sec officer he'd put in charge of tracking down their next of kin. However, there were still about ten stragglers left, with no one to care for them but a few exhausted medical aides that could be better used somewhere else. He suspected it wouldn't be long before they were shipped off station as well, to one of many overcrowded colony orphanages, but not before Kaidan had a change to brighten their day just a little bit.
Slinging the sack of old toys he'd appropriated from the Council warehouse across his back, the Major felt a little bit like Santa Clause.  There were a couple of balls to replace the on the stodgy c-sec officer had confiscated, three old board games, a few dolls and plush animals, and one very precious hand held vid player. He couldn't wait to see their little faces when he arrived with the gifts - and one other surprise.
"Hey Shepard," he called towards the back of the apartment. "You ready to go? You're the guest of honor."Â
As long as one didn't look too closely at this particular stretch of the wards, they might actually be able to pretend the war had never happened. Minimally damaged in the first place, this part of the Citadel had seen the first of the repairs. Four months later, the shops were all open for business, brand new glass in the windows and their wares all on display on rebuilt shelves. The restaurants had actual food in them now; both grown in the restored labs two levels down and shipped in from the few untouched colonies in the Traverse. There were holographic plants pretending to emit oxygen and all the floating repair drones - found here in abundance mere weeks ago - had all moved on to other parts of the station.
Walking down the well lit street, Kaidan shoved a lab grown, but perfectly grilled, hot dog between his teeth and chewed delightedly.  The bun was soft, the dog was juicy, and the ketchup had just the right tang. Like his impromptu lunch, some things about this tiny slice of pristine, in an otherwise dark and dingy galaxy, were glorious. He'd been able to order new boots, armor, and serviceable duty uniforms for him and Gabby, as well as buy provisions for the lengthily voyage they were about to embark on. Purchasing supplies like that would have been impossible mere weeks ago before the relays were back online. Â
On the other hand, a few decks below and above this one, the Citadel still looked like a burnt out husk, with huge gaping holes torn into the hull like mortal wounds. And even in this place of bright, artificial sunlight and fragrant fast food, the healing was only skin deep. The people, the lifeblood of the Citadel, were still broken; shell shocked and weary. They wore tight, forced smiles and walked without making eye contact. Every loud noise made them jump and skitter, as if everything they'd just been given was suddenly going to be snatched away again.Â
Shaking the dreary thoughts aside, Kaidan swallowed his last few bites of bread and vat grown beef and made his way past a row of shops, towards a terminal where he could call a cab. Shopping done, and having finally received clearance to leave the station in exactly five days, he needed to get home. The Invictus's retrofits were complete, but there was still a long checklist of preparations to be done.
Just about to leave the shopping district behind, a small, elegant display in a window caught his eye. Sparing a moment to indulge his curiosity, Kaidan approached the little shop and peered at the surprising assortment of fine jewelry housed within. A sign propped up behind the sparkling gems, precious metals, and black velvet busts, explained how such a store could still be open. It read: "Family heirlooms appraised and purchased for credits. See shop owner within."Â
Kaidan didn't have any jewels to sell, never being much for expensive adornments - or any adornments really, beyond his dog tags and the few metals he'd earned in his career.  It was nice though, to see that there was some recourse for the people who did, to get some money to feed their families, even if it did mean selling something precious. One couldn't eat memories.   Â
Just about to move on again, Kaidan paused, mid turn on the ball of his foot and inspected a grouping of rings in the bottom left corner of the case. His breath made a little cloud on the glass as he tried to get closer, to confirm what he'd thought he'd seen was real.Â
A thin, silver toned (maybe, platinum, maybe gold) band, held a princess cut sapphire exactly the same shade as Gabby's eyes. It was held in a tension setting, flush to the metal, with no little spikes to catch on clothing or armor. A heavy ache settled into Kaidan's chest; a sudden longing to purchase it, to keep it in his pocket until just the right moment, when he could surprise the woman he loved. The intensity of this desire shocked him, as did the implication of such an act. Gabby, despite her impeccable strength, and  the deep strides they'd made in their relationship of late, was not ready to make that promise. The acknowledgement was rather sobering.
In contrast, Kaidan thought maybe he'd been ready for it since the first night he's spent a few months back in the Normandy SR2. He'd walked back into the Commander's arms and never looked back.Â
It didn't hurt to go inside and get a closer look though, right? He asked himself. It wasn't like he had to propose today, or even next month, or next year. It never hurt to be prepared, right? Decision made, and steeling his resolve, Kaidan reached for the door handle.
Drinking with Dominic Osoba on the way back to the Citadel had been as much a revelation as it had been fun. The man was a lot more laid back than he’d expected from a politician, especially one trying to bring about a post-war reconstruction. They had talked about that a bit, mostly how the council was planning to claim the terminus systems in an attempt to stabilize the galaxy - something Kaidan had mixed feelings about – and their troubles with property rights, now that Cerberus had been disbanded. Mostly though, they just sat and talked about simple things, like romantic troubles, the best breed of puppy, and which country on Earth made the strongest whiskey. As much as Kaidan loved Gabby, it was nice to talk with someone else for a change and relax a bit. The slight buzz Kaidan got from Osoba’s excellent Irish whiskey didn’t hurt either, (although Kaidan personally preferred Scotch).Â
Afterwards, he felt a bit at a loss, not really feeling like waiting in the apartment for Shepard’s wrath to come storming down on him. He’d had his reasons for not discussing with her the promotion he’d turned down before leaving the Alliance. Now he was going to have to explain those reasons to her and more likely than not, it wasn’t going to be a civil conversation. He supposed he kind of deserved it, but that didn’t mean it was something he was looking forward to.
Wandering around a bit, Kaidan eventually found himself down by the docks. The refugee camps were eerily quiet, most of their residents all crammed into the observation decks and vid rooms upstairs, so they could watch the relay activation festivities. The sick kids in the clinic were still there of course, and Kaidan delighted in handing each one of them healthy enough to eat, an orange or a bagel. Their little faces lit up like he’d just handed them the world and it made his eyes sting a bit.Â
Kaidan’s heart suddenly ached with such intensity, he needed a moment to steel himself. After, he sat down on one of the empty to meet the boy’s gaze. Instead, the child surprisingly climbed right up onto his lap and sat there, obviously used to strangers caring for him. A group of about ten mobile children gathered around to hear his response. “Yes,” he said gently, addressing them all, “the relays are back online and I know if your parents can come for you, they will. But, some may not be able to come.  I’m so sorry.”
The little boy in his lap stared up at him, impossibly large, brown eyes still dry, as if all cried out long ago. “Why?” He asked simply.
An older girl, of about eight or nine, huffed and crossed her arms across the oversized Alliance sweatshirt she was wearing. “Because they’re probably dead, stupid.” She exclaimed, “Just like everybody else.”   Â
“Hey now,” Kaidan scolded, gently. “You don’t know that for sure. None of us do.” He looked down at the little boy, still completely stoic while Kaidan was nearly shaking with sorrow and apprehention.Â
“What happens to me if she’s dead?” he asked, showing no more emotion than if he’d asked where the bathroom was.Â
“We’re going to find somewhere for you,” he promised, honestly having no idea how to accomplish it, but vowing to follow through nonetheless. “We’ll find a place for all of you. We just need to be patient. You won’t be forgotten.”Â
The children all stayed silent after his declaration, either too tired to comment or too used to empty promises to believe him at all.
 “Hey, this is supposed to be a happy day,” he exclaimed, forcing a smile and hoping the kids would follow suit. “What is it you guys do around here for fun?”
“We had a ball,” one of the older boys said, frowning, “but c-sec took it away.”
A little blonde girl stuck her lip out and scowled, “He said it was too dangerous to play down here, but he wouldn’t let us go nowhere else, neither.”Â
An even younger girl, with dark curly hair and freckles, suddenly burst into tears. “I lost my dolly,” she cried, face growing instantly red and barely able to catch a breath.   “I tried to get her before we got on the shuttle, but mommy said we didn’t have time. And then she didn’t come with me either cuz there was no room for her and I really miss my dolly!”Â
Kaidan stared at the child in horror as she cried, at a complete loss as to how the situation had degraded so quickly. He’d only been trying to cheer them up. “Um...ah...” he flailed, until a plump, middle aged nurse came over and scooped the girl up.Â
“Shh.....Zhanna,” she soothed. “Calm down. You don’t want to scare the nice man that brought us food do you? He might not come back.”      Â
Kaidan opened his mouth to protest that wasn’t the case at all, but the nurse’s little fib seemed to do the trick. The girl sniffled a few times, wrapped her thin arms around the exhausted looking woman, and popped her thumb in her mouth without another sound. Â
Spectacle over, the other children turned their wide gazes back to Kaidan. They just stood there, blinking like cows, as if he held all the secrets to the universe. “Um,” He tried again, wracking his brain for something to cheer them up, at least for a few minutes. “Do you guys want to learn a song?”Â
Almost immediately over half the kids’ faces stretched into tentative smiles. A few of the older ones scowled, but didn’t move away. “What song?” The boy in his lap asked.Â
“Okay,” Kaidan continued. “It’s one my mom taught me when I was little. I’ll sing a line, and then you guys can repeat after me, okay?”
Eleven small heads with varying colors of messy, unwashed hair nodded their agreement. Kaidan took a deep breath, prayed he remembered all the lyrics, and sang the first line. “Why are there so many, songs about rainbows, and what’s on the other side...”
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February 2, 2187 – Beyond This Place of Wrath and Tears
Despite all the terrible things that came along with this post-war galaxy - the loss of his father, Gabby’s damaged, but slowly healing body, the nightmares and sudden flashbacks - Kaidan had been living in a bit of an idealized, optimistic dream world for the past few weeks. He wouldn’t let himself dwell on the pain and sadness, pushing it deep down again and again, the very instant it started to rear its ugly head. Â
They’d won. Kaidan was whole and intact; miraculously not missing any limbs or large pieces of his heart.  He had a place to live, clean clothes to wear, and enough rations to survive. Somehow it felt disrespectful to dwell on the negatives in that case. So many others had lost much more than him; sacrificed so much more. What right did Kaidan Alenko have to cry, to scream, or to curse the universe? By most standards he was one of the luckiest bastards alive.
But now, skirting through streets that had once been Citadel docks – D34, D36, D38 – but were now overpopulated, noisy, unwashed refugee camps; Kaidan could barely breathe through the tightness in his chest.Â
The people here had nothing and nowhere to go. Most of them just stared as he and Shepard walked passed, their blank, emotionless faces telling him more than their tears ever could. There was a makeshift hospital at the end of a row, full of soldiers so pale and still, he’d have nailed them in boxes himself if the machinery hadn’t been displaying their vitals. The other end of the clinic was full of civilians – mostly children. Some rocked back and forth, wracked with deep, barking coughs from smoke damage, or disease. A few managed to sleep on one of the few remaining cots, or curled around each other.
They passed through the last corridor before reaching bay D40, an actual working dock with ships instead of starving people. A group of about ten civilians stood by the entrance. They perked up as he and Shepard approached, begging for work. Kaidan had to shake his head. “We’re just here to look at the ships,” he told them. “I’m sorry.”Â
A young Asari sat huddled in the corner, a tiny child cuddled in her arms. If they’d been human, Kaidan would have guessed the little girl to be about two, but he had no idea how that translated into Asari years. The mother looked up at them as they passed. She wore the same horrible blank stare as everyone else, but something gave him pause. The child didn’t seem hungry at all, still all plump cheeked and sleeping peacefully, while the mother looked thin, haggard, and exhausted.   Kaidan slid towards them without thinking and crouched down to their level.
“You’re giving her all your rations aren’t you?” he said, although it was more of a statement than a question.Â
The Asari didn’t answer, but her large violet eyes filled with tears.Â
“Here,” he said, reaching into his jacket pocket for the spare energy bar he always carried, just in case. “Please eat this yourself. What’s going to happen to her if you don’t make it?” Â
She nodded, giving him a small smile of thanks, before Kaidan stood and made his way back to Gabby. “We have got to get those relays working,” he told her quietly, “or everyone here is going to starve to death. Earth can’t support them all. Hell, it probably can’t support itself right now.”     Â
Being a high ranking officer, and a spectre to boot, certainly had it perks on occasion. With general communications still down in most areas on Earth, talking and texting between personal omnitools without a signal booster was problematic. Instead of waiting in the endlessly long line to use one of the public terminals the Alliance had set up though, Kaidan had been shown immediately into one of the private communication hubs at the makeshift headquarters.Â
Currently, this room was primarily used to relay information between recovery teams and refugee camps. Cleanup crews were still working round the clock, trying to collect and incinerate every minute scrap of dead reaper they could find and trying – somewhat futilely at this point – to identify the fallen. However today, as Kaidan sat down in a wheeled office chair and punched in a command on the holographic interface, he was using it for much more personal reasons.
The holo screen crackled to life immediately, its orange glow illuminating the otherwise dim office. A woman’s face, framed in a waterfall of dark curls and still lovely despite being nearly sixty years old, shimmered into view. Her large, caramel colored eyes grew wide when she recognized him. Her jaw dropped open for a moment in disbelief, before her hand covered her lips. She didn’t make a sound, but Kaidan could see her trembling, even though the grainy, rust tinted image.
Anne Alenko raised her hand to the holo and Kaidan copied the gesture, their fingers merging through the image in a facsimile of touch. “They said you were alive,” she croaked out, “but I didn’t let myself believe it until now.”Â
“I’m okay,” he answered, flashing her a wry smile. “Things got a little hairy for a while, but I’m all in one piece. How are things at home?”
“Our house in the city doesn’t really exist anymore,” she explained calmly, but Kaidan could see the pain in her eyes. “The orchard, including the land and the house, seems to have come through almost unscathed, so we were pretty lucky in that respect. We didn’t get too many reapers this far out in the country, but there was some mild damage in town.”
Kaidan nodded, unsure of how to respond. All things considered, they’d faired far better than most, but she was still talking about things and places close to his heart. “Are you alright?” he asked, knowing the question was stupid, but needing the answer regardless. “You’re not alone out there, are you?”
“Oh, no,” she smiled. “Jen and the kids are staying with me. Carl is....” she paused, took a deep breath. “Well, we don’t really know. So, they’re here with me right now.  I have more than enough room and it’s a welcome distraction.”
Jen was Kaidan’s first cousin on his father’s side. Being very close in age meant they’d always gotten along quite well at family gatherings. He’d been at her and Carl’s wedding a few years back, although he’d never met their children.
“That’s good, Mom,” He agreed. “Any news on the rest of the family?”
Anne gave him a rundown of names, most of whom he hadn’t spoken to in ages. His mom’s younger sister was injured but in stable condition at her home in Northern England. His dad’s two brothers had sent simple texts confirming they were alive, but not giving much more information than that. More than half his cousins were MIA or out of contact range.  And of course, there was still no word on his father, although Kaidan didn’t hold out much hope of ever getting closure for that.Â
“So, when are they going to let you come visit me?” his mother urged. “That fancy spectre status should be good for something, right?”Â
Kaidan chuckled lightly and a scrubbed a hand over his chin. “There’s still a lot to do here yet,” he explained, his tone apologetic and just a little bit sad. “I’ve got a meeting with the brass this afternoon to talk about future plans, so I’ll know more by tonight. I’m not sure where they are going to need me and Shepard is still in the hospital, so...”
“Shepard?” His mother interrupted, her voice perking up and eyebrows lifting clear into her hairline. “You’re not referring to Commander Shepard, are you? There are rumors that she survived, but no one knows for sure. I was so hoping, for your sake, that she made it out okay.”
Kaidan blushed, feeling like an adolescent caught kissing his first crush.   He’d never come right out and said to his mother that he had feelings for his commanding officer, but it was apparent she’d be aware regardless. How would his mom react if she knew he’d spent the night in said Commander’s hospital bed? “She’s going to be okay,” he confirmed simply. “We’re going to be okay.”
Anne beamed. “I’m so happy for you, sweetheart.” She clasped her hands together, looking much more excited than Kaidan was comfortable with. “Now, you know I have to meet her. Will you bring her with you when you come?”
Kaidan balked, having never discussed this topic once with Gabby. He assumed she’d want to meet his mother, but honestly, with her it could go either way. “I don’t know, Mom.” He stalled, giving her a vague rundown of Shepard’s injuries. “It’s going to take some time for her to recover, but I’ll mention it.”
“You do that.” she urged. “You are both welcome here any time, for as long as you want.”
“Thanks, Mom.” He said, the irrational tears welling up once more, but never falling. “I know. And I’ve got to go; I can’t tie up the line too long.”
“Alright,” Anne’s voice was rough now as well.  She blew him a tearful kiss. “I love you so much, Honey?”Â
“I love you too.”Â
The screen fizzled and fell dark, leaving Kaidan with lump in his throat and burn I his chest. He swallowed the sorrow down and prepared to face the day. Hackett was waiting for him.  Â