#meditato

@lucianinalittizzetto e questa è la sua storia:"La #radice equilibrata" Cresciuta in #casa spostata in balconata. Ha #meditato tra #pioggia e #vento per poi essere trasformata. In #punta di #piedi si mantiene e non è #facile che la tieni. Tra una #foglia due #bacchette, chiedi a lei che ci #riflette 🙇🏼💆🏼 (presso Radio Deejay)

Today I cried on my couch in my new apartment, cried because I saw my Aunt today and she was lovely and kept giving me food. Cried because I miss my Mom, and I am so overwhelmed with happiness that I have been given the chance to get closer to her in the past year-to love her like I always should have. Cried because I miss my brothers and the way they can both make me angry in no time at all (for completely different reasons) and how they can both make me laugh like no one else seems to be able to. Cried because my friends have texted me almost every day since I’ve been here, and I don’t know how to tell them how disappointed I am in myself for an outcome that hasn’t happened, but how in love with them I am-how I want to jump through my screen and kiss them on the foreheads (because that is my favorite kind of kiss.) Cried because I miss my Dad, and how generous and truly thoughtful he is, how sometimes when he’s quiet I can sense another world in his cornflower eyes. Cried because Lucy is so excited for me, and I can’t help but think of how she has moved mountains to be with my brother and I envy her that bravery, and miss those brown eyes tracking my own. Cried because living without Becky and Braden is like opening the door to loneliness and saying, ‘come on in, I have plenty of room and no one to talk to.’ Cried because I miss going to work, trading hugs and compliments, and basking in the simple efficiency and strange beauty of a cash register. Cried because Jess seems farther away when I don’t have a world of vines and sunshine to plant our memories, to watch them grow. Cried because now I think back to who that couch used to belong to, and I can picture my beautiful cousin and her family in their big house on the hill where they no longer live, and I miss them too. Down South, planting new roots, and that’s ok too. It still makes me cry.