May 18
hinge crush met my sister today in an awkward encounter in which i froze … chat am i cooked
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hinge crush met my sister today in an awkward encounter in which i froze … chat am i cooked
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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today i had my third doula training. one of the members of the cohort was a patient of our teacher in 2001, her baby was the first one my teacher caught 23 years ago. today we all watched her birthing video together. my teacher still remembered the lyrics of the song they sang as she labored for 36 hours and the tactile feeling of the couches they gripped. sometimes i’m happy being alone in the way i am now, but i hope one day i find a love that makes me want to be a mother. i hope to feel the connection they felt in many multitudes over many lifetimes. i’m grateful to bare witness to love in all the forms it takes, in my life, in my loved ones, and in the strangers i meet along the way.
maya’s 2025 ins and outs
ins:
writing more / joining writing communities
outside time
boundaries
making the first move
scent based rituals
seeing my friends
stretching
becoming a licensed driver !!
live jazz
discipline
self discovery
outs:
using social media as a crutch
being shy
self isolation
reading or watching without reflection
fear
desire with no steps forward
bitterness
smoking weed everyday :(
coming home and instantly becoming my scorpio moon ruled EMO ASS 14 year old self is a crazy switch from my normal taurus sun ruled gourmand 22 year old self
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
in a week i will return to my childhood home after spending the semester away for school. today is the second day of my t break and i haven’t stopped crying since and im not surprised.
and i can’t stop thinking about how the family i’ll see in a week is not the family i grew up with. they are happy, loving, and they hold space for me. part of me is resentful and angry that this is not the family i always had — if they were always capable of change why did it take so long? why was i burdened to be a mother for so long instead of a child?
but i guess its up to me to let go. to understand that this family is now the way it is because of my gentle hand, because i became the change i wanted to see. it’s only through my love did they learn to love me too.
maybe one day i can go back to being the youngest child, screaming for help, capable of receiving it, she’s always with me … i hear her right now. but i’ll always be sacred something is coming, because it always is right? i hope i can let go, i hope i let myself the space and grace to do so. i’m exhausted of being this way.
one of my coworkers partner’s made them a perfume based off a memory of painting them trellising tomatoes last summer 🥺🥺 WHO EVEN THINKS OF SHIT LIKE THAT WHAT
my first attempt at hawaiian garlic shrimp 🦐🧄🌺 my family actually loved them i felt like a god