#mathdebator

Oh god, wasn’t he gay? Aren’t YOU gay?

This place is sweaty and oily and decorated with creeps double your ages tucked into corners nursing shitty drinks and tired strippers just trying to make it through the shift under the blinking light of neon signs threatening to give out with the slightest surge of electricity.

Oh god this was gonna be great.

(And if it wasn’t? That’s what recovery Dennys is for.)

Your own grin damn near splits your face when he talks. “It’s leviOsa, buddy. Get it right.”

((#ooc I love the m!a name!))

((I see you brought your own dish to the potluck ;D))

This seriously needed to stop.

You know there’s not exactly a lot of room to sit in this compartment (what the fuck are you trying to lie to yourself for this is a CAGE, fuck these rusty old carnie rides you swear to god this cage will be your grave) but the way the guy is trying to wedge himself into the seat with his bag is just…ouch. The bag has been wedged in between his hips and the wall, leaving only so much room for him to sit and as a result you are getting elbow poke right into your side. 

Maybe he’ll put it away by the time the ride starts, you think. That’s before the damned thing jolts to a start, and you get a solid one right to the intestines.

“Oof!” And now you’re smacking his elbow away, even as down becomes up and you’re not sure if ‘away’ still means the same thing anymore. “Ouch man!”

“Sorry dude I didn’t–SHIT my bag!” 

The force of pushing his arm away seems to have managed to somehow shift the guy enough that the bag comes loose from the wedged point and falls hard onto the floor (ceiling?).

The good news is the entire cage is enclosed, so that bag isn’t falling out anywhere.

The bad news is you see the open zipper just before what is probably the entirety of his pocket change spills out. Into the enclosed, spiraling cage. With you two. Plus his entire bag still there.

The cage shifts backwards. The bag falls. The coins bounce hard enough to dent.

Monty Python has zero zilch shit on you. Just, the baffled look on the guy’s face, the little nod, the backwards step just silently agreed upon, it’s flatpan humor’s wet dream. Very wet, honestly, too wet for that to have actually worked out as smoothly as you both obviously wanted it to.

The second he starts stumbling you are there, automatically swinging an arm down to try to catch him before you can properly think about why this might be a Bad Idea Bears (tm) moment. But the reasons become pretty apparent pretty fast--1, you have even less purchase on this freaking bathtub than him, being thoroughly watered and at least previously soaped up--squeaky clean leaves very little room for friction.

2, of course, is that you are buck naked. Something you hope he forgives you for as you go tumbling head over heels, putting your arm under his head and neck so he at least does not break his skull on the tub floor and catching yourself on the back wall just enough that you don’t squish the poor guy flat--guy your size might break his ribs if he fell full force on him.

You do end up giving him quite a bit of a, uh, show though. You figure eyes offended is probably marginally better than skull fractures. Marginally. Maybe. Perhaps.

He’s got the shower pole in one hand. Oh boy, that means water’s getting everywhere now doesn’t it?

just saying our name can summon us dude its in our dna

oh for the love of

i am not a furry man! we went over this already!

i am just in the presence of a very dedicated furry very often and therefor will make characters to appease her that i don’t even remember after i’m done using them!