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Lord Mat,
I have a dentist's appointment on Tarmon Gaiden, and my company commander told me that I have to ask your permission to take off for my appointment.
So, can I have that afternoon off for the sake of my dental hygiene? I'm sure I can get proof I was there.
I know time is very strange closer to the Bore, but the Last Battle is definitely not just one day long. Go get your teeth pulled, we’ll all be there when you get back. Wish I could sit this one out.
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We’ve made an update to MatGPT! You can now ask MatGPT your questions completely anonymously.
He is very paranoid though, so using this option comes with a 20% increase in him assuming the asker is someone he knows personally.
Hey so uh, time sensitive question, but say my friend has somehow wandered into this weird magical tower with no doors on it and hasn’t come out what should I do? It’s been two hours and I’m starting to think he’s not coming back out. Should I go in after him or cut my losses and tell his family that he got eaten by a bear?
😬 I can’t believe I’m saying this, but just wait there, I’ll be right over.
Loial wants to know what your favorite tree is.
Black yew. It’s the best thing for Two Rivers longbows.
Hi my name is Mat Knotai Prince of Ravens Cauthon and I am married to the Seanchan Empress (that’s how I got my name) and today I’m wearing a black scarf and black wide-brimmed hat that covers my scars and one remaining eye like brown carnelian and a lot of people tell me I look like The Blood (AN: if u don’t know who that is please get me da hell out of here!).
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Somebody left a modified firework in my tent in an attempt to kill me. I dismantled it before it could explode, of course, but now I have all this flammable material on my hands and nothing to use it for. Any suggestions?
What luck! Turnabout is fair play- if you have a good idea of who did it, rig it back up again and return it to sender.
If you don’t know the assassin or there are too many options, try setting up a trap for them and catching them via the reassembled firework.
If catching them is a fool’s errand, try separating it out into bits and seeing which parts explode on their own. Don’t do this indoors or where Aludra can see, though. Maybe wear a wide-brimmed hat for eye protection. (Once you only have one eye, you start caring more about saving the remaining one.)
Hypothetical: I am dancing with and (sometimes) kissing this lovely waitress when her father walks in. How do I best charm the man?
If he has visible knife scars: You have made a mistake. Instigate a bar fight and escape in the confusion. Never return.
If he does not have visible knife scars: Buy him a drink, compliment him on raising a modest and strong-willed daughter, lie through your teeth about your line of work. Lose at dice if you have to. Never return, but arrange to meet her at a different inn, later.
Mr. Cauthon, what do you think a hero is and is not?
My name is Mat, Master Cauthon is my father.
Heroes are fools who want glory more than survival. Just doing what has to be done isn’t heroic, though it’s about as much work for less recognition.
