#markoakley

Reba. Reba Reba Reba. Queen of Country Music (right? Is that her? I don't know, I thought we didn't do monarchies in the country). The woman who gave us FANCY (Don't let me down! Which is an entry for another day) has also released the single "Turn on the Radio." 

Now look, I don't want to be ageist here. If Reba has some gentleman (or lady!) friend who has mistreated her, and she would like to tell him off, then by golly, she should. Just, perhaps, she (or rather, Cherie Oakley, Mark Oakley, and J.P. Twang [?!?!]) might not have the strongest grasp of social media. Let's look at the lyrics. 

Try to call, twitter me, text until your fingers bleed. Oh! The DJ's the only way you*re ever gonna hear from me. If you're reminiscing, and you're missin me this much, and you really wanna stay in touch.

Yes, that's right. She tells him to "twitter her." From listening in on conversations, I gather that it's cool and folksy for those of a slightly older demographic to flub the verb that goes along with Twitter. It's "tweet." I will tweet you. Try to call, tweet me, text until your fingers bleed*. It's really not hard to grasp.

Come on, Reba. You've embarrassed yourself with this song.