Inspired by @manswaps​‘s prompt.

“Bro, your hair is still damp,” Patrick said, examining his new ginger hair in the mirror.  “Did you shower right before the meeting?  God, you did, didn’t you?  I can still smell the soap on your skin.  Is this Axe body wash?  You try way too hard not to offend anyone.  You know that, right?”

Ethan bit his lip, choosing to say nothing in response.  Out of all of the people he could have been swapped bodies with for Rush Week, it had to be Patrick.  He was quite possibly one of the most bitter, caustically sarcastic people that Ethan had ever met.  Admittedly, his smooth face and defined chest were both in the solid “win” columns, but Patrick’s signature leather jack reeked of nicotine.

Patrick folded his arms.  “No response, huh?  Well, maybe spending a week in my body will help give you some confidence.  So, you do know how to smoke a cigarette, right?”

“I don’t smoke,” Ethan said, shaking his head.

“Ethan does not smoke,” Patrick said, gesturing at his new body.  “But Patrick smokes a pack every two or three days, and I am going to be super pissed if I come back to my body and find out you’ve put me into a nicotine withdrawal.  You’ve got my debit card, make sure that you use it.  I’m biased toward Camels, but as long as you don’t go menthol it will be fine.  Make sure you’re using condoms.”  Patrick correctly interpreted the grimace that flashed across Ethan’s face.  “Or don’t have sex, whatever.  Just be safe if you do.  And if you try and eat too much spicy food, you’ll be shitting fire.  If you eat Chipotle more than once this week, you’re gonna have a bad time.  And that’s basically the crash course for being Patrick.  Anything I should know about your body?”

“I... lemme think,” Ethan said, surprised at the sudden softer side on display.  “I can’t eat eggs without getting terrible gas.  Like, gut-rumbling, blame it on the dog terrible.  And if you don’t keep up on my nightly ProActive treatment, my face is probably gonna break out something fierce.”

“God, I do not miss having to worry about acne,” Patrick said, giving his new face one last rubdown in the mirror.  “Well, have a good night, Mr. Axe.  The boys and I will be taking your frosh bodies out to Myrtle Beach for the weekend.  Hold down the fort, and I’ll see you on Sunday.”  Patrick slapped his old body on the ass before swaggering out the door, leaving Ethan alone to question the life choices that had brought him to this point.

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It had been a weekend full of firsts for Ethan.  He certainly wasn’t planning to start smoking once the swap was over, but he had to admit it wasn’t as bad as he’d been raised to believe.  More to the point, he was starting to realize just how much he had lucked out by swapping with Patrick.  Sure, the sudden withdraw of $200 from his checking account was concerning.  But maybe that was just how expensive everything was there at the hotel?  Gavin had taken all of his clothes with him when he left, forcing Jake to walk around naked until they’d been able to find him something that fit his massive linebacker frame.  And Dean texted a photo from a tattoo parlor-- Trent was now the ‘proud’ owner of a barbed wire bicep tattoo.

The biggest surprise was realizing that Patrick must have been gay.  Seeing Gavin’s hairy body in the nude was odd enough.  He couldn’t divert his gaze, but at the same time he’d never seen so much body hair on a man, so surely that was the reason?  But then again, he’d never noticed how sharp Shawn’s jaw was before.  The final nail in the coffin was waking up early Sunday morning for a smoke and seeing the track team jog by during their practice.  Seeing the sweat glisten off of their chests was enough for him to feel his erection strain against his jeans.

Was he only gay because he was in Patrick’s body?  Or had he just been in denial prior to this experience uprooting him from his sheltered upbringing?  It was hard to say.  And when he saw what Patrick had done, he had to admit that it was hard to care.  He’d spent that entire $200 on a new wardrobe.

“Do you like what you see, Mr. Axe?” Patrick said, with a coy smirk.

“That depends,” Ethan said, returning the smile.  “I have to admit my body looks damn good in those clothes.  Is it gay to have sex with yourself?”