// aaaaaaafrhenfkerg, ty!! ♥ (i’m very slowly trying to make my own too but wjgjreg super helpful ilu)

// wow rude

How long had it been? Ten years?

Maker, I have aged.

Champion seemed a hollow title when those that celebrated her success were those who didn't know her name. Years of insisting she only be called by her family name made that wretched first all the worse. She had hated it all her life, hated to be called it even beyond her tolerance for those she allowed to hear it from. And oh how she hated how she would beg that someone would call her it now. What she would do to have one, both, all of her family back to call her by her first name... She didn't dare to think.

It was easy to wish to be anywhere but Kirkwall. It had almost felt like home, once, but to step beyond her door to be greeted only with the smiles and hellos of people who would profess they knew her felt cold. The thankful hundreds couldn't compare to the very few she would surround herself with given the choice. It was this homesickness that brought her... home. Her first true home, and as her feet dragged upon the rain-soaked grass, her own cloak heavy on her shoulders soaked with the droplets, she could only swallow thickly. She was surrounded now by the ruins of homes, broken stone and charred wood left behind by the Darkspawn advance.

Perhaps it hadn't been a good idea to come at all.

How long she stood in front of the ruins of the farmhouse, she couldn't count. Grey eyes slowly travelled over the building, taking in everything. The door hung from its hinges, miraculous that it remained connected at all. Part of the roof seemed to have caved in, and as muddied boots began to thump upon damp wood as her slow steps carried her across the threshold, it became apparent a lot of the floor had rotted, too.

Rags surrounded her, broken wood littering the floor and the remains of their furniture in pieces. One table was on its side propped against a wall, a blanket not part of her memory to be found. Had someone hidden here when the 'spawn had arrived? Swallowing thickly once again, she pressed forward, subconsciously holding her breath as nausea began to twist her stomach and she passed into what had been the bedroom she had shared with the twins. It seemed to have fared the best, the room mostly intact, one bed still together though the bunk seemed to be in pieces.

The bow was not immediately clear to her, poking out from beneath a piece of debris, only pulling her attention when a foot not raised fully from the ground kicked the plank of wood across the floor. Her sights fell, immediately landing on the bow and all at once the sorrow that she had so fervently swallowed back hit her in one wave. She fell to her knees, pale, shaking fingers reaching out for the small weapon that had been so important to her then, that had been left behind in their haste to take only the essentials.

Fingers curled around that small bow, and she pulled it to her chest, head bowing as eyes pressed tightly shut.

// [sobs 5eva about the tragedy that is otp:beard/blood smear] forever the two remain side-by-side but never shall they meet

// wehfbnhwnfwg goodbye cruel world

// i will not do crack, says the crack addict. roleplayers everywhere hmm knowingly.