From Radical Homemakers:

“Though the romantic idea of homemaking brings to mind concepts like self-reliance or self-sufficiency, radical homemakers recognize that, in fact, their homemaking is only possible through a recognition of their relationships with others.”

“Radical Homemaking is about building self-reliance, but it is not about becoming self-sufficient and living apart from society. ‘There is really no such thing as self-sufficiency,’ argues Sylvia Tanner. She makes the point that Radical Homemaking is not about independence; it is about interdependence, or, perhaps, ‘inter-reliance.’”

Homemakers know the importance of nurturing relationships with family, friends (chosen family), and community. I see the concept of nurturing relationships broken down into knowing, valuing, and maintaining the relationships around you. 

In the time of COVID-19:

For me, right now, that knowing, valuing, and maintaining relationships looks like:

1. Who is my community?

Literally, knowing my neighbours. Who are they? Do I know their names? What they’re like, what they need, what they can give? And if I don’t know them or have a relationship with them, how can I start one? Do they need anything right now that I can help them with?

This applies to the people who are my physical neighbours but also to the local businesses and systems that create my larger community. Do I have a neighbourhood grocer? Who runs it? Is there a market nearby, if not? How can I meet some of the farmers and learn more about them and what this has been like for them?

2. What value do I bring to my community? What value do they bring to me?

Radical homemaking is seeing our home as beyond the physical walls of our house. It is learning to value what skills, resources, and contributions (tangible and intangible) are around us and making clear what we have to give in return.

Valuing relationships is about understanding how much relationships can enrich our lives. It’s knowing that the couple across the street had lawn equipment we could borrow and then sharing the cake and ice cream we made with them in thanks. It’s going through our old art supplies and dropping off the great stuff we’ve outgrown for the little girls next door. It’s knowing that the boy two houses down loves taking care of our cats when we’re out of town. It’s our neighbours knowing we like spicy food but not green thumbs and having them drop off an accidental spicy pepper harvest. Valuing our neighbours is not expecting things to always be reciprocal or transactional, it is knowing that when we’re generous and open about what we can offer our community, they will do the same in return.

3. Don’t wait to maintain relationships until you need them.

A time of crisis is a good time to remind ourselves that we should be appreciating and maintaining our community not only when in crisis or when we need them, but all the time.

Staying at home right now feels a lot less limiting if we can see our home not just in the walls around us, but in the network of relationships that make up our lives.