#majeem

majima: LOSE WEIGHT WITH THIS PARSLEY MIX IN A WEEK! and wrap the stretch roll on your belly. 4 kg melting off 🤙

(It's the extra for the postcard he writes in about the 'Courtship in Graffiti' side mission)

I DID NOT KNOW THAT NO..... this actually reminds me of one of his hostess conversations

he groups himself with men when talking about how they always have ulterior motives when interacting with women, going as far as to call them "beasts". but i find this fascinating because he's not actually doing any of that at all. in that he admits to it in another substory

so like. what gives? why are you acting like youre "just another man" even though it doesn't actually overlap with your experience of being a man, or even sexuality? to the point you're ashamed to even be grouped with them?? but you're grouping yourself with them willingly? why are you being so uncharitable to yourself to the point of ignoring the reality of the situation? something that is demonstrably uncharacteristic of you? and the answer is shame, shame is what's making him so neurotic about this, he thinks he can't run from this "fact" just because it hurts. he thinks it's deserved.

i dont think that substory (courtship in graffiti) was even about acting on sexual urges, iirc he felt a connection to the girl who wrote that in the bathroom (a woman in a men's bathroom, no less) because she seemed *lonely*. that was the draw for majima, that he felt implicitly understood by her, not that he was horny and impulsively followed that urge. he was looking for emotional connection

BUT AGAIN. he's so ready to pretend it was sexual. he instantly accepts the portrait dolce kamiya paints of him even though it's literally not accurate. because he doesnt think he has the right to defend himself, because he's so ashamed of his sexuality, and that shame drives him to automatically accept the most uncharitable interpretation of his own feelings. but the shame is also specifically tied to the fact that he's a "man". because majima thinks men having sexual urges towards women is literally like. evil. at the same time he's stuck trying to *be* a man in a socially acceptable way, y0 majima is all about trying to conform to societal norms. and he thinks he needs to have sexual urges to perform masculinity "correctly". but it's just this endless shame spiral, and the shame always revolves around being a man – both being born as a man and having to be a man