#maddyits2am

*

Bellamy thought he knew what to expect from the star. When a star crashes out of the sky, it looks huge, but by the time it hits the ground, it’s just a little piece of rock, an ordinary, everyday thing. He can believe there’s magic in that because no matter how ordinary it looks, it’s still a magical event. And anything that happens over the Wall is, by definition, magic. He can let himself think that the part of the star that lands beyond the Wall is the heart, and that it can cure his sister’s illness.

So it’s very annoying when he gets to the valley where the star fell, and someone else already has it.

“Look, I appreciate you probably need this thing too,” he tells the girl, approaching carefully, as if she’s a wild animal. She looks a little disoriented, as if she wasn’t really planning to take the star, or maybe just didn’t notice it until it struck the ground. “But my sister’s going to die if I don’t take it home.”

She blinks a few times. “Excuse me?”

“The star you picked up. I need it.”

“The star I picked up.”

“We can share it,” he says. “I don’t think she needs to eat it or anything. Just–be exposed to it. I don’t know. I just need to save my sister, and then you can have it back.”

“Have the star back.”

He rubs his face. Is this a Wall thing? Can she just repeat whatever he says? “Fuck, I don’t have time for this. Will you just give me the star?”

“So you can save your sister.”

“What part of this hasn’t been clear?”

She scowls, which he can admit might be justified. He did come out of nowhere demanding that she give up the star she’d rightfully claimed. “I don’t owe you anything, whoever you are.”

“You’re right, you don’t. I’m sorry.” He offers his hand. “My name is Bellamy Blake. My sister is ill, and I was told the surest way to save her was to bring her the heart of a star. I don’t think she has to keep it. It’s your prize, but–I can’t let her die, and I don’t know if another star will fall in time to save her. So–please.”

The girl looks him up and down. “You think you can just take a star home to your sister and cure all that ails her?”

“I’ve been told, yes.” And then, desperation coloring his voice, “I don’t have anything else. If the doctor says this will save her, then this is what I’ll do.”

“And then you’ll come and find me and give the star back?”

“On my sister’s life.”

Her mouth twitches. “So if your sister dies, I don’t get the star back?”

“If she dies, it’s not worth much as a magical item,” he points out. “I’ll give it back no matter what. On my life, and my sister’s. You have my word.”

“The word of a stranger I’ve never met.” She wets her lips. “Where is she? Your sister.”

“Across the Wall.”

“How far?”

“I was able to travel quickly here, but I have to walk back. It’ll take a week or two, I think.”

The girl looks him over again, and then nods, as if agreeing to a statement he didn’t make. “All right. I’ll go with you. I’ll hold onto the star, until we reach your sister. I don’t have any reason to trust you.”

“I guess you don’t. Thank you,” he adds.

“Will she make it? Or will two weeks–”

“She’ll make it,” he says, making himself believe it. “She has the time.”

“Still,” says the girl. “We should hurry.”

“We should,” he agrees. “Thank you. Again.”

She smiles. “You’re welcome again. Now, which way are we going?”

*

Over the next few hours, he starts to suspect there’s something off with the girl. Her name is Clarke, but that’s about all she seems sure about telling him. When he asks her how old she is and where her family comes from, she hesitates, and when he asks what she wants with the star, she only shrugs.

“Stars are lucky.”

“I don’t see why a fallen one would be,” he points out. “If it fell out of the sky and ended up here, how lucky can it be?”

“Lucky for whoever finds it.”

“And you need luck?”

“Who doesn’t need luck?”

He shakes his head, smiling, and she looks pleased, as if she’s won something. And maybe she has. Probably, she’s one of the fairy folk, someone whose life is incomprehensible to Bellamy. That’s how it’s supposed to be, across the Wall. Magic is real here, and thriving, and whatever Clarke wants to do with a star is almost certainly outside of his understanding.

“How did you get here?” she asks, a few hours later. “You said you had a way to travel quickly, and that’s why you came just after the star fell.”

“My mother had a Babylon candle.” He pauses, but if there’s anyone he can safely tell about himself, it’s this girl from beyond the Wall, whom he’ll never see again once she’s gotten her star. “She came here, she said. Before I was born, she said she came beyond the Wall to the market, and that’s where she met my father.” He rolls his eyes. “It’s a nice story, but I know better than to believe it.”

“Why don’t you?” Clarke asks. She sounds curious, as if she really doesn’t know. “If she had a Babylon candle, she must have gotten it somewhere. Why couldn’t your father be some man from this side of the Wall?”

He glances at her sidelong. “Because she knows so many more from the other side. I know she wanted to make me feel better, about not having a father, but–I’d rather she just told me the truth.”

“You’re the one who decided she didn’t. If you’ve already made up your mind that she’s lying, what’s she supposed to do?”

“For someone who refused to tell me anything about her family, you have a lot of opinions about mine.”

“If I wanted your opinions on my family, I would have told you about them. Since you did tell me–”

He has to smile. “Fine, you’re right, it’s my own fault. But no one’s going to worry about you?”

“They know where I am.”

“This cryptic thing is already getting old, in case you were wondering.”

She beams; it feels as if she’s getting more cheerful as it gets later, which is not how Bellamy tends to experience the world. “Not really, no. It’s working out very well for me.”

“As long as one of us is enjoying this,” he mutters, but there’s a smile tugging at his mouth.

Whatever else she might be, she really isn’t so bad.

*

A week later, he’s feeling much less patient with her.

“You need to tell me what the fuck is going on.”

“What makes you think I know?” she asks, but he knows her well enough by now that the tone doesn’t fool him. He just scowls until she wilts. “Stars are useful. You’re not the only one who wants one.”

“So how does everyone know you have one? And what do they want to do with it?”

She bites the corner of her mouth, clearly torn. They’re actually staying in an inn for once, sharing a room with two beds because he’s not willing to leave her alone after a week of people trying to kill them. Just because they dealt with today’s sorcerer and came out unscathed on the other side doesn’t mean he can stop worrying.

On the contrary, he feels as if he has more to worry about than ever.

“Clarke,” he says, pitching his voice low. “Come on. You can trust me. Tell me what’s going on.”

“I thought you’d figure it out,” she says, with a huff of a laugh. “I’m the star, Bellamy.”

He blinks. “You’re the what?”

“What do you think I was doing there? I didn’t just end up in the center of a crater with a falling star by accident.”

“How are you the star?” he asks, still trying to catch up. “You’re not a star, you’re–”

“This is what happens when stars fall over the Wall. We join you.”

“And when were you going to tell me that? Was I the only one who didn’t know?”

“No. Plenty of people don’t realize what I am. But most of them weren’t looking for me.”

His jaw works as he looks her up and down. It’s not such a huge betrayal, not as long as– “Can you save my sister?”

“I don’t know.”

The bottom drops out of his world. “You don’t know?”

She doesn’t back down, chin raised defiantly against his advance. “I don’t know,” she confirms. “I’ll do everything I can. But when we go past the Wall–magic doesn’t work, on the other side. If I’d fallen there, I’d be a piece of rock, and I wouldn’t be able to save anyone.”

“So why did you come with me?” he demands. “What did you–”

“You didn’t give me much choice,” she snaps. “If I told you I wasn’t going to give you the star, or that it wouldn’t work, what would you have done?”

He exhales, trying to get his temper under control. “So she’s going to die.”

“No,” says Clarke. “Look, do you know what I was going to do? I was going to leave you. As soon as I thought I could get away. I was going to find somewhere safe, where I didn’t have to worry about anyone going after my heart.”

“So I’m supposed to be grateful you stayed?” he asks.

“I stayed because I want to help,” she says. “I can’t go to your sister, but if you get her to me–maybe I can do something. Maybe I can save her.”

“Maybe.”

“You never knew if it was going to work. All I can tell you is that I’m on your side, and if you get your sister to me, I’ll do everything in my power to save her. I promise.”

He looks her up and down, as if he can see the lie. “What happens to you after that?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, if you’re really as powerful as you say you are, aren’t there always going to be people looking for you? Trying to–”

“Cut the heart out of me?” she asks. “Maybe. I’ll figure something out.”

“That’s what they want to do?” he asks, horrified. “Cut your heart out?”

“That’s what you needed too, wasn’t it?” she asks, and of course, she’s right. “The heart of a star.”

“I thought whatever got down to us was the heart of the star,” he grumbles. “How was I supposed to know the star was an actual person?”

“No one sees it coming.”

“Fuck. So you just have to–live with this?”

“I’ll figure it out,” she says again.

It’s impulsive and a little ridiculous, especially given how much of his relationship with Clarke has been a lie, but he still thinks he knows, well, the heart of her. Who she really is.

“We’ll figure it out,” he says. “Once I know–once my sister’s taken care of, you’ve still got me, Clarke. I’m yours.”

Her smile brightens. Not just that, her whole face brightens, her whole body. “Really?”

“Really.” He tucks her hair back. “You should maybe work on that–whatever’s happening right now.”

“I’m a star, Bellamy,” she says, like this is obvious. Like he didn’t only just find out. “I shine.”

*

He doesn’t think much of the shining; it’s just another thing Clarke does. When she smiles, or she laughs, when she’s happy, she brightens. It happens to humans too, just not quite as literally. It doesn’t seem like a big deal. Like she said, she’s a star. It makes sense she’d have some quirks.

They get back to the Wall, and Bellamy has to carry his sister across it to Clarke, finds her in their room in the inn with a knife out and ready to fend off one a man who doesn’t actually seem to be getting any closer.

“Ah,” says the man, glancing at Bellamy. “That explains it.”

“Explains what?” Clarke snaps.

He holds up his hands, dropping his own weapon, a perfect model of non-aggression. “I won’t take a useless heart. And yours won’t do me any good.”

Bellamy feels the blood drain from his face. “Clarke, what’s–”

But she doesn’t look upset. “Useless?”

“At least to me.”

“Oh good,” she says, which is even more confusing. Seeing his expression, she adds, “It’s fine. I can still help your sister. You just have to ask.”

“Ask?”

“Tell me to save her.”

It seems odd, but it’s magic. Magic is inherently odd. “Save her,” he says.

“Help him get her on the bed,” Clarke tells the man, and to Bellamy’s surprise he does. And since he doesn’t leave after that, Bellamy takes a position next to him.

“You don’t have anything to fear from me,” says the man. “As I said, she’s useless to me. The first to claim the star’s heart keeps it. Now that it’s been claimed, I couldn’t do anything with it if I got it.”

He frowns, torn between the desire to argue the point and the total lack of desire for the man to change his mind. “I had no idea I was so lucky.”

“I’m sure you still don’t. But you’ll figure it out.”

He doesn’t get a chance to, not until the next night, with everything else going on. First he has Octavia to take home and get squared away, and then he’s not even sure he should be going back, if Clarke still needs him.

But even if she doesn’t, he still can’t leave without saying goodbye.

She’s still at the inn, and when she sees him, she lights up the whole room with her smile.

“How’s your sister?”

“Completely recovered. I can’t thank you enough.”

“You don’t have to thank me. I should be thanking you.”

He frowns. “Because I–claimed you?”

She looks down at her hands. “You didn’t claim anything. You didn’t–” Her eyes flick back up to his, nervous but sure. “It’s my heart, Bellamy. It’s mine to give. And it’s yours.”

“Mine,” he repeats.

“Yours.”

When he kisses her, the room goes bright again, so bright he can see it through his closed eyes, and he grins against her mouth. “So I should stick with you, huh?”

“I was hoping you would want to.”

“Well, stars are lucky, right?” he teases, kissing her again. “I could use some luck.”

He gets it, too, but none of the good that follows–and a great deal of good does follow, as his mother apparently knew he would–is ever equal to the simple fact of having Clarke by his side.