@lunarrps ♡ samantha.
her hazel eyes were gleaming with unshed tears. she hated crying in front of dean. she always hated the fact that she cried so easily compared to him, even sam. she hated how weak she felt for being the only girl, for being the one that everyone always underestimated. from their father, to dean, and sometimes, even her twin brother. she stood there, taking his words—she felt the hurt and the anger in them. he really did see himself as their parental figure. it wasn't his fault. it'd never been his fault.
it wasn't a role he chose for himself, but that was placed on him. it was never fair. she wanted to fix that. but god knows she has no fucking clue how to do it. all she knows is that everything between them has always been so complicated, and it always hurt so much whenever she tried to fix it. “ how the fuck can we not? look around dean! look at our lives! danger is knocking on our door every goddamn day! what are we supposed to do? nothing? shit. sammy tried. he really did. he got out, he dragged me with him, and we tried. but look what happened. we're fucking cursed. you don't get it. ”
the tears finally fell.
“ we don't go looking for trouble, dean. trouble follows us. ”
the laugh that leaves her is broken. bitter, and sad. “ a picket fence life? really? you really think that's still in the cards for us? jesus, dean. you can't be that naive. ” she lifted her hands up in frustration, running her fingers through her hair as she turned her back on him. “ if anyone can get out of this, it's you. you're not the one with a target on your back. you're not the one who's cursed. but fuck, dean. can you really blame sam for wanting a home? for wanting, i don't know, more than cheap motel rooms and facing monsters every night? i'm not whole without him. i have to follow him where he goes. and all i ever wanted was for you to come with us. ”
