#luna auclair

1- In your own words, tell us what you like most about your MC / OC. 

I love how passionate and carefree Luna is. She loves and gives without expecting anything in return. She is an amazing character, one I’d love to be friends with (because she’d know some hot guys and could get me a date 😅). Overall, she‘s very sweet, but hurt her friends or family, and you’ll get to know another side of Luna. 

She’s just a good soul with good and bad sides, which I love. Luna is sunshine mixed with a little hurricane. 

2- Do you feel your MC / OC is like you at all? How are you alike or different?

There are some things Luna and I share. We both struggle with anxiety. We both have a similar eye color (blue-green) and a shade of blonde hair. Hers is lighter than mine. We both share the love we have for our friends and family. We do share the same taste in guys or are somewhat similar 😅. We are different in the sense that Luna is a more creative soul, and she’s less stubborn than me 😅. 

3- What is most important to your MC / OC? What is their motivation in life?

Luna just wants to leave a good impression on people and life itself. She thinks if you send positivity into the world, good karma will return to you. 

To make memories that’ll last a lifetime. A life well lived and one that’s cherished. 

4- What are their biggest pet peeves/dislikes?

People who are judgmental of others

Liars

Tourists/Locals who endanger animals (in the ocean and on land alike) and litter (throwing their trash everywhere, including the ocean) 

5- If your MC / OC could change one thing - anything - what would it be?

Less war, hate and negativity in this world. Just live and let live. 

6- What is your MC / OC's favorite quote or song? 

Luna’s favorite quote is a Hawaiian saying her grandmother always mentions: ‘A’OHE PU’U KI’EKI’E KE HO’A’O ‘IA E PI’I – (No cliff is so tall it cannot be climbed.)

7- Other facts about Luna

Luna got her Bachelor of Fine Arts at the University of Hawaii. She specialized in ceramics, drawing, painting, and sculpture. Currently, she teaches art at the University of Hawaii, but she wants to have her own gallery in Honolulu to showcase her art and show how proud she is to call Honolulu her home.

She actually has a sweets drawer; Bryce always makes fun of her but secretly takes some caramel-covered almonds from Luna’s drawer, and she pretends she doesn’t notice 😅.

Her favorite painting by Lindsay Wilkins is ”Akala Sunset“ (akala = pink in Hawaiian).

8- Is there anything else you’d like to share about your MC / OC? 

I created Luna while going through a rough patch in my life. I was fired from my job during COVID, and so many other things were happening, so I was looking for something to help me deal with things. That’s when I found Tumblr and all these wonderful people. At first, I hadn’t even thought of writing anything, but then I kept having this idea for an OC, and I wrote down a fic, and it went from there. 

Luna inspires me daily. To live in the moment, to enjoy life. To spend less time on my phone (even if it’s where all my notes about stories and characters live 😅) and to spend more time with my friends and family. To love pink. Be more positive in life, and not let the bad days win. To simply be more me, my sometimes weird, full-of-energy Aries self.

I‘m also SO grateful I created Luna and all my wonderful stories. Thank you to anyone who’s ever given my characters and stories a chance. I will never be able to express my thanks and gratitude 🥰.

Also, here is a little thank you letter from Luna. 

Dear you,

Whatever happens in life, whether good or bad, don’t take it too personally; don’t let it consume you. Just try to breathe out and let it go (yes, it can be like the song from Frozen 🥰) I learned a long time ago that if you carry hate and bad vibes with you, it’ll be like a bad smell, you can’t get rid of, and you don’t want that do you? So be you!!!!!! However, you choose to be, whatever you wear, how you express yourself. Be you!!!! And maybe live close to a place that has a lot of sun and a beach (just saying, vitamin D is good, you know, and yes, the advice came from Bryce 🥰) 

Whoever needs to hear this: I see you. You are loved; you are worthy. This world wouldn’t be the same place without you in it. Never forget that!

Bryce Lahela from Cake by the Ocean

”Nice fruit loop on your face. Newest fashion trend?“ he teases.

Bryce Lahela from ”How were we ever strangers.“

“I said yes people. That’s right. Luna is finally making an honest man out of me,“ he continues to say it over and over again doing a victory dance.

Ethan Ramsey from I do 

”From where I‘m standing you were just trying to ruin a wonderful day. What’s even worse you were insulting not just me, which I can live with, since I don’t care about your opinion of me. But you insulted my wife and our dear friend. Something I won’t tolerate. So if you don’t want to be here then kindly fuck off,“ he says and his words warm my heart.

Skyler Auclair from A Pinch of Pink and Blue…This one’s for you

”Are you sure you put more than one slice in there aunt G? Cause I think poor Bryce might starve. Since Lunes here will probably eat at least one slice of apple pie on the way home,“ Sky shakes his head at me and winks.

Maxine Moore from Cinnamon Sugar

”Oh my god. So my dad taught chemistry at a middle school right here in Honolulu. So this one time we wanted to try out this experiment what would happen to ketchup if we put baking soda in it,“ I say and take a sip from my coffee.

Bryce Lahela from Always & Forever

“Baby, don’t apologize, there’s no need, and if you need a hug or anything, you can always tell me. You know that,“ he catches a tear with his thumb, while I didn’t even realize that I was crying.

Luna Auclair from Paint Wars

”You are. Saying how you’re exhausted. All you did was sit on that couch and look pretty,“ I wipe tears from my eyes.

Bryce Lahela from Summer‘s Kiss

”It was our bodies who created the magic, the bed was just a side piece.“

Nik from my Nigthbound AU vs. Hänsel & Gretel - Chapter 2 - Strange Encounters

“Pie-boy is getting roasted. I knew something was missing,“ Nik says grinning.

Trystan Thorne from Moja Ruža

”I love it when you boss me around.“ I gave her a kiss on her cheek.

A/N: In case you missed the parts before here they are: Part 1, Part 2

2nd A/N: I went a bit off canon with Bryce and what happened with his parents, just as an fyi. Also thank you for everyone for reading this story and giving it a chance 🩷

Side note: I also made a playlist for Part 3, the previous two parts include a playlist as well.

Maui, Hawaii 

A few years ago…

Bryce

I sang along to some song playing on the radio, still pumped from a round of basketball with my friends. I kicked Kainalu‘s ass and ran laps around him. I still can’t believe I beat him this time around, he cursed throughout the game. But it was just a game between friends.

When I turned the corner to our house I saw blue flashing lights, alerting me that something was wrong. I put the car in park and slammed the door as I got out.

Did something happen? This is a pretty safe neighborhood. My parents made sure we had the best-equipped security system around. The best money could buy.

Several cop cars have pulled up in front of our driveway. I saw two police officers escorting my dad into a police car. My eyebrows rose high. Not able to make sense of this whole situation and what is unraveling right in front of my eyes.

I ran towards the entrance of our house where officers were carrying out some of our things. Such as computers, laptops, phones, everything, and putting them into evidence bags. I kept staring as if this was a nightmare I couldn’t wake up from.

When I wanted to enter our house an officer stopped me.

”You can’t get inside.“

”What do you mean I can’t get inside? I live here.“ I replied, with a sharpness I reserved for people who get on my nerves.

”Please Officer, that’s my son.“ My mom‘s voice came from the entrance. The officer looked me up and down and finally, after what felt like hours passed, he nodded and let me enter.

”Alright. He can enter. But don’t touch anything.“ He called out after me.

I got inside and my mom pulled me to the side.

”Let’s go to the kitchen.“ I followed my mom as if I were in a trance. My body moved, but my mind was somewhere else.

The questions kept circling in my head like hungry vultures ”What the fuck is going on here? Why are there cops in our home? Why did Dad get arrested? What did my parents get themselves into?“

I whirled on my mom, but she put her forefinger on her lips telling me with her eyes not to ask any questions that were burning on my tongue. Then she hugged me and whispered into my ear.

”Listen carefully, we don’t have much time. There’s a small bag in your sister's closet. Take it and get her out of here. There’s enough money that should last you for a while. Since I’m sure they froze all of our accounts.“

I wanted to break off the hug and look at my mom. But she held on tight.

”But…“

”Do as I say ku’uipo. Know that your father and I love you. Take care of your little sister until we figure things out. You hear me?“ My mom hissed. I nodded slightly. ”Good.“

We broke off the embrace and it’s as if I’m seeing a different mom. Not one who kissed my bruised knee when I fell from my bike as a seven-year-old, or who sang me Hawaiian songs when I had the flu.

She put her hand on my cheek as if she sought comfort from me. She kissed my cheek and a feeling of dread settled in my stomach. I let out a breath I’ve been holding in.

After a few seconds, I went upstairs. Before heading up, I took another look at my mom, tired lines had etched themselves into her bronze skin. I turned around, taking one last close look at her before I climbed the stairs leading to our bedrooms.

As I went up I looked for the bag my mom mentioned. Though Keiki is nowhere in sight. I sprinted to the closet and when I opened it I whistled when I saw all the cash, fake IDs, and passports inside the bag. Whatever they did, they must’ve had a backup plan.

I recognized a fake ID when I saw one. I used one to get into clubs and bars while still underage. This isn’t a simple bag, this is a run-for-the-hills, get-out-of-town for a while kind of bag.

I replaced the bag my mom prepared with my gym bag that was slung over my shoulder a few minutes ago. Making sure no one saw me swap the bags I went outside and looked for my sister.

”Kei-Kei?“ I went to my room, and there she was. Hugging her green sea turtle to her chest. I gave it to her last Christmas.

She was sitting on my bed. Scared to death if her tear-streaked face was any indication. Her dark brown hair was held in a ponytail by a pink elastic. I kneeled next to her.

”Keiks? Come on, let's go.“

She looked at me and I took her little hand into mine. Her hands were shaking and I covered them with mine to lend her some strength.

”Go where? I’m so scared.“ Her big brown eyes, so much like my own, were full of more unshed tears.

”I know you are scared. But I’ve got you Kei-Kei.“ When she hesitated I smiled and squeezed her hand.

”I’m scared too, Keiks. But why don’t we go to a safer place? Hmm?“

”Today is my birthday, Bry. Are we going to celebrate with mom and dad?“ She asked, looking up at me.

I closed my eyes. Shit. It’s her birthday. How do you explain this shit show to your six-year-old sister?

”We‘ll go to some friend's house for a few days. You and I will celebrate with some cake and ice cream. Mom and Dad will join us when they can, okay?“

”Okay. But I want a big cake. With mango flavor.“ She said excitedly.

”You got it Kei-Kei.“ I said and smiled at her. When she saw me smiling at her she smiled back, nodded, and wiped her tears away.

I put the bag over my shoulder and hoisted Keiki up, carrying her downstairs. She clung to me and I winked at her which made her smile. Officers were still taking everything and bagging it as evidence.

Damn what the hell happened? I’ll have to ask my parents another time. First I needed to make sure Keiki was alright.

Though from the looks of it, our lives would inevitably change forever.

Honolulu, Hawaii’

Present Day…

Bryce

With a start my eyes snapped wide open, looking left and right, seeing familiar surroundings, making me relax in bed. I reached for my glass of water on the white nightstand next to me, since my throat was all dried up.

I haven’t had memories resurface like this in a long time. Moments from when my parents were arrested. I’ve always wanted the memories gone and I’ve suppressed them. Guess they’re coming back in full force now.

I rubbed my tired eyes. When I turned my head I saw that Luna's side of the bed was rumpled. Though her side was empty.

I didn’t have to be at work until later in the afternoon. As I turned my head I looked at the clock at my bedside. The green numbers said 7.35 am and I just wanted to stay in bed all day, but I knew I’ve got to get my shit together and get out of bed. No matter how hard it is.

I rubbed my eyes again and got out of bed. I went into the bathroom to take a cold shower. Maybe that’ll wake me up.

15 minutes later I was dressed and ready to face the day. The first thing I noticed as I got downstairs was that the kitchen was empty except for Keiki and Evie sitting at the kitchen table talking in hushed tones.

After the flashback I just had, it feels weird to see Keiki all grown up now. As if you fast-forwarded turning Keiki 23, instead of 6.

When I entered they stopped talking.

”Good morning,“ I walked towards the coffee machine to get some coffee. Starting the day without coffee? Impossible.

”Morning Bryce,“ Evie said while Keiki kept herself busy with Cheerios and some mango slices.

Looking at me, her eyes full of questions I don’t have the answer to. I put it aside to answer later. Because as of right now? I don’t know what to say. Honestly.

”You know an apple would be good for you. Instead of all that sugar, you eat all the time,“ I said pointing to the bowl in front of her.

”How about no? Also, I have some mango smartass.“ She said and stuck out her tongue at me.

I grinned.

”Real mature Keiks,“ I replied and sat down at the kitchen table, across from Evie. Keiki's phone chimed and she went upstairs to take the call.

Evie scooted closer.

”Is everything okay Bryce? Luna is usually up before you. She’s usually in the kitchen preparing breakfast or ordering in and singing around. You know, since you and making breakfast usually almost turns into having to call the fire department,“ she grinned but her green eyes turned serious within seconds.

I chuckled but the sound was more hollow than rich with joy.

”It’s complicated. Let’s leave it at that Eves,“ I said, not really in the mood to hash out what happened last week. Too restless to sit, I get up and just lean against the fridge.

Evie got up too and she squeezed my arm.

”I get it, this is between you and Luna. And you want to solve this on your own. I won’t pressure you for details. But Bryce? You’re one of my favorite guy friends, well make that the only one. So if you ever need to talk, or just get wasted? I’m your girl. You went through a lot. I can tell. So if there’s something you’d like to get off your chest I’m here. Don’t bottle it up. When you’re ready we’re all here. For you and Luna. You’re family okay? You’re not alone,“ she aimed a watery smile at me.

I nodded and hugged her, not able to say more than that. She gave me another hug and grabbed an apple from the fruit basket.

”At least one person in this house eats healthy,“ I said teasingly.

”I heard that,“ came Keiki's shout from upstairs.

”Good,“ I shouted back.

I do what I always do when everything gets too much. I go to Manoa Falls when I feel upset. It’s my and Luna’s favorite place in the world.

Sitting there on the moss-covered stones and hearing the rush of the waterfalls? It’s like you’re one with nature. That peacefulness? Food for the soul. When I get there I let the silence and chirping of birds envelop me and ground me. My phone chimes with a text, my heart sped up and I think it might be Luna, but it’s just a Spotify alert. Suggesting a new song to one of my playlists. I unlock my phone to see which song it is. It’s , which must be for Luna she loves Maddie & Tae. I sigh when I lock my phone again.

Only too soon do I have to get back because my shift is about to start.

I got dressed for work and before I was out the door I heard Keiki calling my name and I turned around keys in hand.

”Hey are you guys okay? I could tell Luna was upset about something,“ she asked gently.

I nodded.

”We’ll be okay again. We’re just going through a rough patch. It’s all going to work out,“ I said and kissed my sister on the forehead.

She nodded.

I walked out the door to get to work. Hopefully, work will distract me from my problems for now.

Later that day…

Aubrey got out of the OR. Her brown eyes blazing.

”What the fuck is wrong with you Lahela?“ She asked me.

I leaned on the wall. Trying to get a breath out. But all that came out was a wheezing sound rather than an actual breath.

She noticed I was not saying anything and must’ve seen my face. Pale as a ghost.

”Deep breaths Lahela. Come on. You got this. Deep breaths. In and out,“ she instructed me and I did as she said.

My hands started to tremble earlier during surgery. Again. What the fuck is going on?

I tore the surgical cap away and threw it onto the floor. Tearing at my longer hair. Not seeing where the cap landed and not really caring at this moment.

”Okay talk to me. What’s wrong?“

When my breathing was under control again I looked at Aubrey.

I was breathing slowly, still not able to talk to anyone.

”I had a fucking panic attack. That’s what’s wrong.“ I said a heartbeat later.

”Okay. Just breathe and relax. Just stay here, okay?“ She said and left to give me some space.

This happened before but I didn’t see it as a panic attack.

I thought I just had some anxiety left from the day before when I talked to a family who were seeking answers for a surgery I couldn’t perform because it was too risky.

What if complications occur? They will blame me for it.

It’s a pretty complicated surgery and I didn’t know how well they would handle any complications or repercussions I told them about.

I sighed again. I didn’t even realize that I pulled out my phone and dialed Luna’s number.

”Hey B, what’s wrong?“ She said and I could hear other people mutter in the background. She must be at the store or something.

”Can you come to the hospital? I know we’ve fought, but I really need you.“ I said quietly.

”Of course, I’ll be right there.“ She said. It‘s as if our fight was forgotten.

I don’t even know how I got to the locker room as I’m sitting on the cold, hard linoleum floor. My head is resting between my knees.

As I’m trying to get my breathing and my heart rate under control.

Breathing exercises didn’t cut it. But slowly my heartbeat normalized and I could breathe freely again.

I didn’t know if she’d even come if I called her. After our fight, everything seemed out of balance.

But Luna is the only person I wanted to see. I just wanted to feel her soft touch and smell her guava shampoo. Knowing she’s close and I can hug her when my anxiety is high? Deeply comforted me.

I was still sitting like that on the floor when I felt soft hands caressing the hair at the nape of my neck.

I shivered and when I turned around I saw Luna’s concerned face.

”What happened?“ She asked and opened her arms for me.

I hugged her because I needed her. For the first time in a week after our fight, I felt good again.

It’s as if I‘m a functioning human being, who’s been deprived of human touch for so long. However weird that sounded, it helped to hug her. That physical contact from the person I love is exactly what I needed.

We barely talked, just exchanged a few words here and there. But it’s not like it’s usually with us. Jabs and teasing here and there. Laughter and kisses.

I missed her. I didn’t know you could be in the same room with the person you love, yet feel so lonely. As if you’re miles apart.

She stroked my hair and just whispered some lyrics of a song to me. I think it was ”I Have a Dream by ABBA“.

”My hands started shaking and I panicked during surgery.“

”Oh B I‘m sorry that happened, but I think ever since you visited your dad you came back differently.“ She pointed out carefully as if she wasn’t sure what my reaction would be.

”Of course I did. There are way too many emotions eating me up right now. I just needed to sort them all out.“ I remarked.

”B please tell me what’s going on. Please, I don't know how to help you if you don’t tell me,“ Luna whispered.

”I feel lost. Lost and sad and I don’t know.“ I admitted. I broke down. I wrapped my arms around her as I cried silently and she held me close, showing me she was right here with me.

”I’ll give you anything you want Bryce. I love you so damn much. I’d even eat some oatmeal.“ She shivered involuntarily. The disgust of having to eat oatmeal was evident on her face. She hates it. I laughed through my tears. She pushed some strands of my hair that had gotten longer out of my face and I squeezed her hand.

”Would you be willing to go to therapy? We could go together if you want. Or you could go alone. Whatever makes you feel more comfortable.“

To be honest I’ve been thinking of going to therapy for a while. I’ve been a wuss to go though.

”I’d like that. Know any good ones?“

Luna nodded.

”I do. We can make an appointment. And we can go whenever you feel like you want to go.“

I nodded and just kept leaning into her. I turned my head and looked into her blue-green eyes.

”I never meant to hurt you when I didn’t tell you I visited my dad. I…just don’t know…“

Luna took my face into her hands.

”It’s okay B. We’ll figure it out together. And if you want to spend some time figuring things out with your parents I support you.“ She said and after a heartbeat, she continued.

”I suffer from anxiety and depression. I know what it’s like when it’s getting too much and when I don’t know what to do with my emotions. When I want to scream and cry and just get out of my skin for a while. I get it. That’s what painting is for me. Maybe we can find something you can find comfort in.“ I smiled. Even now when we’re still not sure where we stand exactly, she tries to help and support me. I couldn’t love her more if I tried.

”I always liked working with my hands. Building things. I was always good at it. I once built a princess castle for Keiki.“

”That is so sweet. I bet it was pink.“ Luna smiled softly and I smiled back at her. If there’s one person who loves pink? It’s Luna. But it’s endearing and I love that about her.

”Maybe you can work something out with Adam?“ She suggested.

”You think he’d let me?“ I asked not sure if Adam would let me help with any of his projects.

”Of course. Adam loves you like a brother. He’d help you. Especially if he knows it helps you to feel calm.“

I admit feeling ashamed and mortified that my hands would start to shake again. Is something wrong with me?

”There’s nothing wrong with you B. Sometimes emotions boil over. It’s when you’ve bottled things up too many times. I know that. That’s why I’ve turned to art. When I create art it lets me get out some emotions I‘ve been feeling. We can do some painting together if you want.“

I didn’t realize I'd spoken out loud. I nodded, not able to look at her, afraid she’d see how emotionally exhausted I was.

First visiting my dad, our fight, and now this panic attack during the surgery. Maybe some vacation would do me some good. I‘m sure I can work something out with the chief of medicine. Alana is amazing and she‘s very understanding.

”I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about my dad. I just didn’t want to share it because I was scared that if you saw and knew everything you’d…“

”What? Run away? B there’s nothing that could make me run away from you. No matter what happens. Sure I was hurt that you didn’t say anything, but I understand that sometimes certain conversations aren’t that easy. Especially when it’s with a family member you haven’t talked to in a while. But whether we fight or if we have a make-out session all day, a relationship is never easy. But we work on it. We compromise, and most importantly we love each other. Come hell or high water.“

I looked up at her and I could tell from the expression in her eyes that she meant every word.

She hugged me again and I simply leaned into her, borrowing some of the strength that she was offering. We sat like that for another 10 minutes, until Luna had a pained look on her face and I could’ve slapped myself by letting her sit on the ground.

”B not to be rude, but can we maybe go somewhere else? I feel a bit uncomfortable sitting like this.“

”Oh my god I’m sorry of course. Here let me help you up.“ I got to my feet and helped her up.

”Thank you. For being there for me.“ I kissed her soft lips, giving you that warm, cozy feeling as if you were coming home.

”Always.“ She smiled tenderly.

I knew we’d fought, but things will get better again. I believe that.

Bryce

I parked the car in the garage and shut off the engine. I got out and felt the night air surrounding me.

It’s so much quieter now that the engine is off. Only the sound of the ocean and cicadas can be heard.

When I walked out I could hear Luna in the kitchen singing along to a song on the radio. It’s from the eighties I think.

When she heard me come in, her whole face transformed into a beautiful smile. Her blue-green eyes lit up like the stars. I hate that those starlit eyes will go out.

”Hey handsome I’ve missed you,“ Luna walked towards me and leaned against my chest smiling at me.

I smiled but it didn’t reach my eyes.

Her smile dimmed and she looked at me. She scrunched up her eyebrows in confusion.

But I just needed a minute to settle down. I opened the cabinet where we kept the strong stuff.

I opened a bottle of scotch. A gift from Ethan and Hayley. Who knew this is exactly what I need right now? And pour myself a drink.

I knocked it back like it was water and poured another round.

”B what’s wrong? You’re scaring me a little,“ she pulled her pink sweater closer around herself.

”I went to see my dad,“ I took a sip of my second glass of scotch.

There’s pain and confusion in her eyes. I hate seeing it there. She straightened her shoulders and looked me square in the eyes.

”What? Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve gone with you!“ She said, coming closer. She put the glass out of my hands and placed it on the kitchen table.

”This is something I needed to do on my own. I just didn’t want anyone to come with me, since I didn’t even know if I’d have the guts to go inside,“ I admitted.

”B no one and I repeat no one would have judged you,“ her voice getting soft.

I sighed in frustration.

”Don’t you get it? I wanted to go alone…I…“ I ran out of words and shoved my hands through my hair.

I’d rather throw my glass against the wall, to see it shatter, like my heart is shattering right now. I sighed and leaned against the kitchen counter.

Luna sat down in one of the kitchen chairs. Her hands were placed over her stomach.

And I felt like even more of an asshole. I didn’t want to add any kind of stress to her. But damn it if my emotions aren’t a raging tornado inside my chest.

”I didn’t mean to keep it a secret. I needed answers. Peace. Solace. Closure. I needed something,“ I said and I could tell Lunes was mad and disappointed in me. Her eyes display everything.

”I’m just sad you didn’t tell me, Bryce. I’d be the last person to judge you. I love you. We’re getting married. We’re having twins for god's sake. I feel like you excluded me and that hurts,“ she breathed hard and I could see her pulse kick up.

The vein at her neck throbbed. Meilani is already worried about Lunes' pregnancy and wants her to be more careful and avoid any stressful situations.

I let out a breath I was holding in and sat next to her.

”I didn’t mean to hurt you. But I know how much you’d want my parents at our wedding and in our children’s lives. I tried getting some closure for myself. I wanted to get a feel for what they’re like now! I didn’t want you to get the wrong idea about them. Like some fairy tale,“ I said it and instantly regretted it.

She snorted.

”Look if you don’t want them in our lives, okay fine. But don’t treat me like an idiot. I might be blonde but I’m not stupid. I can form my own opinion. Thank you very much. You’ve kept it pretty close to what your parents have done, and that’s your right. But sometimes it feels like I don’t know you or at least not everything. Sometimes it feels like I’m on the outside looking in,“ her voice getting smaller by the second.

I wish she’d scream at me or throw things. This quietness is almost unbearable. It’s killing me. It’s different. Seeing her this quiet isn’t something I’m used to seeing.

I want to reach out my hand and touch her, but I let my hand fall to the side. I don’t think she’d welcome my touch right now.

I breathe out just to have something to do.

This is our first real fight. And so close to the wedding too.

God, what a mess I created. I reached for the glass with the drink.

And take a sip. Feeling the alcohol burn down my throat. Exactly what I needed.

”Lunes…“ I started.

She stopped me.

”Don‘t. I get that this is very personal and it’s painful to talk about. But you could’ve told me. I would’ve respected it if you said you’d want to go alone. But not saying anything? And then just drop that bomb on me? Not fucking cool Bryce!“

I sigh and put my head in my hands. She’s saying my full name instead of B. Which tells me she’s pissed and she has every right to be.

It will take some time for Luna to forgive me and get over the fact that I lied.

”I don’t even know why we’re fighting about this,“ I said and she didn't say anything to that.

”We’re fighting because we don’t keep secrets from each other Bryce. Yes, our relationship isn’t perfect. But you’re usually not a liar Bryce.“

I flinched as if she slapped me and didn't respond to her. We’re both raw from the words we exchanged. Feeling every single quiet and soft whisper, and it’s like a blow to my body.

She sighs.

”I’m sorry I didn’t mean it like that. I’m mad and sad…pregnancy hormones suck.“

We both smile at each other, but then we get serious again. We both look away. The distance between us grew by the second.

Luna fumbled with her hair and I stared off into space not sure what to say.

A lump formed in my throat again, making it difficult to swallow past it.

”I get it. It was an asshole move. But I didn’t know what to do,“ I say, my voice almost breaking at that.

Luna's face crumbled at the pain in my voice.

”Oh B,“ she murmured and I leaned on her shoulder and cried again.

She held me tight until I leaned my forehead onto her shoulder.

”Your sweater is all wet,“ my voice gruff as I wiped away some tears.

She waved me off.

”I don’t give a rat's ass about my sweater. What I do care about is you,“ she cupped my face into her hands and gave me a gentle kiss. One full of emotions. What she couldn’t say with words, she conveyed with her kiss.

When we broke apart I could see that some traces of pain were left in her beautiful blue-green eyes.

Reminding me that I was the one who put that pain there. I hung my head in shame.

”I didn’t mean to blindside you like that Lu,“ I whisper.

She sighed against me.

”I know. It hurt me and I guess…I’ll need some time to get over it. I can understand why you did it, but I’m hurt you didn’t tell me,“ she said.

I looked up at her.

”What now?“ I asked her. Completely baffled. I have no idea what to say to that.

She shrugged, distancing herself from me. Not just physically but emotionally as well, which hurt more than if she flung any objects or words at me.

I’ve never felt more apart from her than now. As if I tried to grasp her hand and it slipped out of reach.

Luna rubbed her head.

”I don’t know B. Maybe we should just go to sleep?“ She asked hesitantly as if not sure where we stood.

I nodded. Nothing is resolved. But I couldn’t be alone. Not tonight.

As much as I craved space from everyone and anyone, I’m still selfish because I wanted her next to me.

To feel her soft skin beneath my palms. To caress her body.

We walked upstairs. The whole room was tense. We silently got into our sleep attire.

Lunes put one of my Stanford t-shirts on, the ones she used as a sleep shirt, as I got in some sleep shorts resting low on my hips.

Sliding the comforter aside we got into bed. The ceiling fan was on full blast.

Even though we’re still unsure of the whole situation. One thing is for sure. Our love is still strong and it won’t die.

Later in the night, I woke up to find Luna snuggled into my side. Clutching my hand close to her cheek.

I smiled down at her. Trying to extract my hand to envelop her in my arms. She stirred slightly and saw how she was clutching my hand close to her.

”Sorry I…“ she tried to scoot away.

But I don‘t let her.

”Lunes. No matter what happens my love for you is never in doubt,“ I pulled her closer.

I felt her nod more than I could see it.

We held hands and fell asleep. We still have ways to go, but I know we’ll be alright.

Summer‘s Kiss

Luna

”You done painting me like one of the French girls?“ I hear some water splashing and look up only to see Bryce smirking at me. His mouth moves and post out water like a fountain.

”Who said I was painting you?“

”Oh please. I felt you watching me.“

”Ugh. Fine. I was sketching you. Want to see it?“

He nods and swims closer.

”Sure. I hope you got my good side.“

”Did I ever get your bad side?“

Bryce grins.

”No, but I don’t think I have a bad side.“

He comes out of the water, and I’m distracted by a water droplet sliding down his body for a second.

I feel my face heat up because I still get flustered around him even after all these years that we’ve been together.

So I try to focus my attention on his face and not his body.

He looks at my sketch. To which I’ve added some light watercolors. They’re faint, but they’re there.

Bryce looks taken aback by the sketch.

”Damn. Can I frame that? This is amazing.“

”You think so? It’s just a bit of lines with coal. And some watercolors. It’s nothing fancy.“

He puts his hands on his hips.

”Don’t be modest Lu. This is fantastic. I mean I always knew you’re talented but this? This is amazing work Lunes.“

I blush at his compliment. Still not used to Bryce complimenting my artwork.

”Thank you for saying that.“

I kiss him and he’s surprised at first but then he smiles and gently pulls me closer.

I groan but then I pull away.

”I’ve got to leave some kisses for later.“

Bryce pouts.

”No fair. You always stop when it gets interesting.“

”That’s because I don’t feel like getting carried away at Manoa Falls where I can easily slip and fall. I am still pregnant. There’s no way in hell I am risking our kids this way.“

He gets that smile where his eyes soften and his whole body relaxes.

”What?“

”I love it when you say our kids. Makes me look at you, not able to believe we did this. Our magic created this.“

”I’m pretty sure there’s no magic involved in sex. It was pretty much watching my ovulation, waiting and peeing on test stripes to see the words pregnant. But if it makes you feel better B let’s call it the magic of our bed.“

”It was our bodies who created the magic, the bed was just a side piece.“

My snort turns into a full-on belly laugh.

”This is one of the reasons why I love you. You always make me laugh.“

Bryce smiles at me and we continue to spend a couple more hours at the waterfall before the air gets chilly and we decide we should head back.

I take my coal pencils and my watercolors, put them in my bag. I take Bryce’s outstretched hand.

Rays of sunshine, warming our backs as we walk back home hands intertwined.

Part 1

Bryce

I wake up not having slept at all. Tossing and turning in bed all night.

It’s my one day off in the whole week. I talked to the chief to get this day off. When she asked me why I just said personal reasons. Not wanting to say more.

I lie in bed and when I turn around I see Lunes is still fast asleep. I push the blue comforter aside and slowly get up to not wake her.

She stirs and I hold my breath but then she sighs, turns around, and keeps on sleeping.

I get dressed and take my surfboard and head down to the beach.

Needing to get my head around how I’m going to feel about seeing my dad after all these years.

Did he miss me? Did he ever ask about me? It feels weird and scary as all get out. It’s as if I don’t even know him. Or at least not the part where he committed a crime.

I don’t like to talk about what my parents did. How many people they hurt with their actions. I sometimes wish I could erase that part. But if I did? I would’ve never met Lunes, and I would’ve never made such awesome friends at Edenbrook.

I sigh. I put my surfboard into the sand and just sat there on the sand, ankles crossed. Digging my toes into the sand.

Not really seeing anyone.

There are just a couple of people around the beach at 5.30 in the morning.

I close my eyes briefly. Just focusing on my breathing.

Hearing seagulls make their morning calls, smelling the sea, almost tasting the salty air and the rich flowery scent. Engulfing me in a sweet embrace.

When I reopen my eyes I can see a bit clearer. I get up, dust off the sand from my shorts, and get into the water.

When I sit on my surfboard and feel the water on my hands I feel more at peace than anywhere else in the world.

Everything fades into the background when I’m in the water. It’s just me and the sea.

I get up and catch a wave just riding it out. I do it a couple of times until I feel I’m ready to face Luna. Look into her eyes and lie to her. I hate not telling her. We tell each other everything. But I guess a part of me is just scared to talk about my past with Luna.

When I get out of the water, I shake off the remaining water out of my hair.

It could use a trim. I haven’t even noticed that it's gotten longer.

I get my surfboard and walk the short distance home. When I get to our beautiful home I just take in the view as I lean the surfboard against the wall of the house and take a shower outside.

Leaning one hand on the wall of the shower for strength.

Water dripped from my hair, past my shoulders. And I watch as the water disappears into the drain.

When the water turns cold I turn the shower off, grab a towel and walk inside.

I see Lunes is up making breakfast. Being her cheerful self. I smile softly.

She’s alone in the kitchen which means Keiki must be still asleep since it’s a Saturday. She’ll probably meet with her study group later.

Lunes looks up.

”Looks like someone was up early,“ she smiles while drinking her chamomile tea with some brown sugar.

”What no coffee?“ I tease her.

She points a finger at me.

”You know damn well I can’t drink coffee. Now you’re just rubbing it in,“ she says, sipping her tea slowly.

I grin and turn towards the coffee machine and my chipper smile fades away. Now that my back is turned I don’t have to smile. I don’t have to pretend to be cheery when I’m not.

My reflection in the toaster stares back at me. My brown eyes, usually so bright and vibrant, seem tired and worn out.

I sigh quietly and pour some coffee into my favorite mug I got from Lunes and Keiki.

”Hot as fuck surgeon“ Making me smile as I put two teaspoons of sugar inside and stir it. The spoon clinks against the porcelain.

Making the sound echo louder in the kitchen than I thought it would. I turn around as I blow over my coffee, to not burn my tongue.

I can hear Lunes talk about some art piece of a student she has to assess but she doesn’t want to give him too good of a grade, but she also doesn’t want to give him a bad one. So naturally, she feels torn.

I listen with half an ear and sip from my coffee.

”Then I think I’ll try out my new sex toy.“

Luna's words get me out of my haze.

I look up and grin.

”Please I want in,“ I say, a bit too enthusiastic.

She grunts.

”What is it about guys getting excited about sex toys,“ she says and gets out some fruit loops from the cupboard.

I watch her but don’t say anything about her eating too much sugar. What’s the point? She’ll eat it anyway. Though I have to grin because her stubbornness is hot as hell.

”Trust me if you were in my shoes you’d find it hot too,“ I say, grabbing a banana from the fruit basket.

She rolls her eyes.

”As if. That’s like asking if I get turned on by you using sex toys,“ she says angrily shoving fruit loops into her mouth.

”And do you?“ I ask, wanting to know if she’d be turned on by it.

But I just want to escape this conversation. Luna sees everything.

It’s why our relationship works so well. Because we talk about everything and anything. We’re each others safe haven.

At least until I decided not to tell her where I’m going today. It’s hard to smile every day when you don’t feel like it.

I look down at my coffee as if it holds all the answers I need.

Luna laughs and I look up.

”I mean yeah sure,“ she’s thinking about it and I just sip my coffee and shake my head smirking.

We finish our breakfast in silence. Each of us hangs on to our own thoughts.

I put the dishes in the dishwasher. Luna gave me her bowl and her spoon and I put both in.

”Wanna watch a movie?“ She asks hugging me.

The perfect distraction before I have to see my dad.

My posture stiffens at that.

She notices my stiffness.

”Uhh or how about a massage? I bought these essential oils. Lavender scented,“ she says, wiggling her eyebrows.

”Admit it. You just want to get your hands on me,“ I say.

She laughs.

”That is very true. Come on, we'll have some fun. Forget the movie. Getting you naked is way more fun than a movie,“ she says and drags me to our bedroom.

A massage sounds really good.

Hopefully, it’ll ease the tension in my shoulders.

Two hours later…

Who knew I’d be this scared? Well, terrified is more like it.

I blow out a breath and hate myself for hiding this from Luna.

We don’t keep secrets. And it’s not for a lack of trust. It’s just I wanted to do this on my own. I know she would’ve come along and supported me if I asked her.

She’s the kindest, most supportive person I’ve ever met. Who gives selflessly without expecting anything in return. I’m fucking lucky to have her.

My heart squeezes when I think of not having her here by my side. To lean on. To draw strength from.

But I wanted to get a feel for the whole situation first. Keiki doesn’t know either.

I stare ahead at the Halawa Correctional Facility. I learned that they put Dad here instead of Maui, fearing someone could attack him in prison there.

The sun is cruelly beating down on me as I’m sitting in my car sweating just thinking of going inside.

I push the hair that’s gotten slightly longer out of my face, get out of the car, and enter the building.

When I’m inside I get patted down and have to answer a bunch of questions. I go through the motions like a robot. Like an outside-of-a-body experience. As if it’s not happening to me. Rather someone else.

I get a visitor's badge, clip it to my jeans, and get directed to the visitor’s area.

When I enter the room I see an older man in an orange jumpsuit sitting at a table. All by himself. Hunched over and completely immersed in his meal.

I look at the guard and he points me to that exact table. I steel myself, gulp down my nausea, and walk in that direction.

When I sit down the man who looks so much like me looks up from his lunch which consists of some rice and beans with some chicken on the side.

His gaze looks gaunt and tired. As if the years haven’t been kind to him. I guess that’s what you get for robbing people of their money.

His brown eyes spark with recognition at seeing me.

”Hey Dad,“ I say, putting my hands on the table. Interlacing them.

He stops eating for a moment. To just look at me.

”Bryce. I didn’t expect to see you…“ he says the surprise clear in his voice.

I rub my neck to buy some time on what to say.

”I wasn’t sure if I would come but I…“ I say and bite my tongue.

He raises his eyebrows.

His former dark brown hair is now tinted with grey. Though it hasn’t lost its shine and wave.

”To what do I owe this honor of a visit from you then?“ He asks.

I sigh.

”Really? This is how it’s going to go? I knew I shouldn’t have come,“ I say about to get up.

His voice stops me in my tracks.

”I…please have a seat. I‘m sorry I didn’t mean it like that. I‘m happy you’re here to visit. Why didn’t you bring Keiki along?“ He asks, looking around as if my little sister will suddenly materialize out of thin air. Yeah right.

I sit back down and stare at him.

He’s a completely different guy. Gone is the arrogant smile. The vibrancy. All that is left is an empty shell of a guy.

I run my hand down my face. Already feeling completely exhausted.

”Keiki doesn’t know I’m here nor does Luna,“ I say and feel a knot form in my stomach. It feels like I’m betraying her trust. Both of their trust.

He looks confused.

”Who is Luna?“ He asks.

That’s right. He probably has no idea what’s been going on in my life. I feel like he stabbed me right in the heart.

Did mom not tell him when she visited? Did she even visit?

Should I have told him about Luna sooner? Maybe written him a letter? Would he have read my letter?

So many questions are circling inside my head. It’s giving me a headache. Maybe I can get some answers to my questions during my visit today.

I wet my dry lips. Wishing I’d had some water to sip from.

”Where to even begin?“ I ask myself.

He leans forward into his chair.

”We’ve got about 25 minutes until I have to go back into my cell. So maybe the speedy version would be good?“ He says a slow smile gracing his face and I can see traces of the dad I once knew. The one I grew up with.

Who took me to my first football game. Who let me throw my first party and wasn’t mad at all the party people and the pricey alcohol we consumed. Who bought me condoms and said just be safe son. I smile at that memory.

I’d like a chance to see that dad again someday. Without ghosts of the past haunting us.

”A lot has happened. I became a surgeon and finished my residency at Edenbrook Hospital in Boston. Moved back to Hawaii where I now live with my fiancé Luna,“ I smile as I talk about Luna.

My dad smiles.

”Tell me, is she good to you?“ he asks with laughter visible in his brown eyes.

I grin in turn.

”She’s the best dad. She’s an artist. She teaches at the University of Hawaii. We’re expecting soon so…“ I finish feeling my cheeks redden for some reason.

My dad has a proud expression on his face.

”I’m really happy for you son. After everything…“ He says.

”Why did you and mom do it, dad?“ I ask a question I’ve been looking for an answer to for a long time.

My dad leans back in his chair and seems to think hard about what to say.

”We did it for our family. We didn’t think we’d hurt anyone. After all, it was just money. Money some people had so much of, they didn’t know what to do with. So we took some of it for our own,“ he says.

”Dad. How could you think you wouldn’t hurt anyone? These people lost their money. Money that we spent. It was dirty money. Money we had no right to have,“ I say hissing trying to not let the past actions of my parents rob me of getting closure and finding some peace in knowing they regret what they did.

My dad nods.

”I know that now. But back then. I…We were selfish and only thought of ourselves, instead of thinking how many lives we would wreak havoc upon,“ he admits his voice gone hoarse as if he was holding back tears.

I have to gulp down some tears of my own. Trying to blink them away. Though some errand tears cover my eyelashes.

”Yeah you and mom screwed up dad. A lot. So many lives were ruined. Keiki and I went through hell in school. We became enemy number one overnight. I finished high school and got the hell out of there. But Keiks wasn’t so lucky. They attacked her on school grounds on her first day,“ I say still angry about that. My fists clench at the table. My teeth grind together.

”They what?“ He says, his voice gotten protective when I mentioned Keiki was attacked.

”Yeah. She told me,“ I say and I’m still angry about that.

He looks at me as if he can sense I’m still angry about it. I mean how couldn’t I be? But I’m trying to move forward. Holding grudges isn’t healthy. Lunes and I are building our life and our future together.

I know she’d love my parents to be in our children’s lives. To have two sets of grandparents for our twins and give them all the love they deserve.

I breathe out through my nose. Trying to reign in my emotions. I can fall apart later. When nobody is looking. This way I show a strong front. Without revealing anything.

”I know if I could go back in time…“ he starts his voice pleading.

”You can’t go back in time dad. There’s no time machine. All you can do now is try to earn back people's trust. Which is going to take some time.“

He stares at me and then looks away. Knowing it’s true.

I move on.

”How much longer have you got?“ I ask, wanting to know when he’s getting out.

It feels weird sitting here. Asking my dad all these questions. As If I’m getting to know him. Again.

After we’ve spent so much time apart. Not because we wanted to. It’s because the circumstances forced our hand.

He sighs as if he’s getting tired of hearing this question, and I bet he can’t wait to get out of prison.

”I’m getting out on parole. Five months and I’m a semi-free man again,“ he says longing in his voice.

His eyes gazed into space. As if he’s picturing getting out and feeling the sunshine on his face again.

I lean forward.

”That’s good to hear dad,“ I say and I’m about to open my mouth to say something when the guard indicates my visiting time is almost over. I nod and gesture for one more minute and he inclines his head.

”I’d like to meet Luna. She sounds nice,“ he looks at me and I can see tears glistening in his eyes.

I don’t answer him, because Luna doesn’t know I’m here today. And I don’t know how she’d feel visiting my father in prison. I feel shame about this part of my life. I haven’t done anything wrong. Though I still feel responsible.

I squeeze his shoulder and he puts his hand on my own for a brief second. I smile and walk towards the exit. Feeling tired. More exhausted than after a ten-hour surgery.

Getting into my car the first thing I do is cry. Where no one can see me. Crying for all the years we’ve been out of each other’s life. Because of one wrong decision. God. What a fucking mess.

I wipe away at my face and start the car, my hands shaking slightly. I sigh. Not again. I fucking hate it when my hands start to shake.

I just drove around for a while. When I sense I’m getting tired I turn towards the road to our house. When I arrived at the driveway I put the car in park and turned off the engine.

Just sitting there dreading going inside the house and facing a conversation with Lunes. She’d be the last person to judge me I know that. But I’m scared shitless.

I draw in a deep breath, gather my strength, and get outside the car.

Things will work out as they always do. I know they will.