#loveturtlesx

I’m sorry, I was feeling all the things and then this blurb happened. I had no idea that it was going to go where it ultimately went. I hope you enjoy! -xx.

She tossed a box at his dozing figure on the couch. 

“Babe, you said you’d help,” she laughed, tossing another ornament box at him. 

“Hey,” his raspy voice groaned, “I lied”. He moved the boxes to the coffee table, “come ‘ere.”

He extended his arms out for her, slowly blinking his bleary eyes trying to find her figure in the dark room. 

“Give me a sec,” she called still maneuvering the boxes around by the windows. Digging through the storage bins her dad had neatly packed for her, she struggled to find exactly what she wanted. There were two storage bins packed to the brim with Christmas ornaments she had collected everywhere she traveled: Prague, Rome, Vienna, Reykjavik, Copenhagen, Dublin, London, Edinburgh, Athens, Chana, Havana, Barcelona, and many many more. Until this year, she had always decorated her parents’ tree with her enormous collection. This was the first year she was going to be decorating her own tree. It was Shawn and her first Christmas living together and their first tree together. Except, their living room was still bare but for the bins her father sent over —he had been eager to clear space in their attic. 

The problem was that she and Shawn did not see eye to eye about their first tree. So, for the majority of December, her holiday trinkets remained in the bins. Shawn wanted a live tree and to make an occasion out of picking one out with her. She thought it was incredibly sweet, but not at all practical. Plus, the sap and needles were annoying as hell. She wanted an artificial tree, and when she told him that they made quite beautiful realistic ones, he laughed at her. She had no desire to deal with the maintenance of the tree when they were constantly on the move. Neither was home consistently to water the tree. She was often working late and Shawn was traveling at the drop of a hat. He disagreed and believed that they could handle the maintenance. Their arguing went round in circles.

Her things were sentenced to be stuck in the bins for a bit longer when Shawn left last week to do a short promo trip in California meeting up with a few different talk show hosts. He discussed their dilemma live on television. She wanted to murder him for it only because it had yet to be resolved. Both wanted their tree to be special, but struggled to find a happy medium. It didn’t help that now they had fans weighing in on their disagreement. When he got home late last night, they had gotten into a pretty stupid fight about it. Their fight lasted a half hour before they were shedding clothing and arguing horizontally. There were several rounds of “arguments”. They both won in a way, but there was no real resolution. Their living room still was not decorated. This bothered her to no end. Christmas was her favorite holiday and she loved feeling festive. How can you be festive without a tree, artificial or not?

Bothering her immensely, she woke up in the wee hours of the morning and wondered out to her bins in the corner, waiting for a home. She pulled her oversized sweater tighter around her frame as she dug into the box. It was soon after that a sleepy Shawn had followed her out into the living room, missing her presence in bed. He joined her and initially promised to help with the decorations that didn’t need a tree, but fell asleep likely from all the intense “arguing” and travel. 

She sighed when she got to the bottom of the bin and still didn’t see what she was looking for. She left the mess on the floor and walked over to a rumpled looking Shawn. He grabbed her hips and pulled her on top of him. She fell non-too gently. Shawn groaned at the impact. 

“Serves you right,” she said, still feeling a little petty. He settled her more comfortably by spooning her, and then swatted her ass. She smirked, “I’m not in the mood to go another round just yet.” 

She could feel him smile into her hair, “what did you need at,” he picked his head up from her hair and squinted at the clock on the cable box, “4:32 in the morning?” His voice was thick still with sleep and sex. She squirmed back into him enjoying his warmth, she closed her eyes and inhaled loudly through her nose. 

His scent toyed with her, “I was looking for a specific ornament my mom gifted me – the Christmas after we started dating.” 

He didn’t respond, but tightened his arms around her torso. He was quiet for so long that she thought he fell asleep. She was lulled into that place between consciousness and sleep from his deep breaths. 

“Baby,” his raspy voice interrupted the silence of the morning.

“Hm?” She wasn’t ready to be fully awake again.

“I’m sorry.”

“Uh huh,” she didn’t open her eyes or mouth. Slowly his apology settled into her brain and she considered it, “I am too.” She responded keeping her eyes shut, still not wanting to meet the day again just yet.

He kissed her hair, “I love you.” 

Her nose wrinkled picking up on his morning breath, “I love you too, but you smell.” 

His belly shook with laughter waking her more, “you’re such a pain in the ass.”

She laughed with him, and when they settled again, she asked, “what do you want to do about the tree?”

He brought her closer to his body, as if she was a stuffed animal. He buried his face into the back of her neck. She opened her eyes at his actions, waiting for a reply that might start another argument. She had no desire or energy in her left to fight about the tree. She just wanted one, live or artificial, to hang her ornaments on and the few they had collected together.

“Don’t be mad.” Oh fuck, Shawn what did you do? She tensed and held her breath waiting for him to speak again.

“I bought something yesterday, that I was hoping would be a decent compromise.”

“And,” she prompted.

“And I was in a gift shop wasting time before my flight when I saw it.” He stopped.

“And,” she prompted again.

“And I saw these seed packets.”

“You bought a snack as a compromise?” She turned her head to regard him.

He would’ve laughed at her had he not been so earnest and nervous about her reaction, “no, I bought spruce seeds. Like for a spruce tree. And- and it comes with a little pot to plant it in. And I figured, if you wanted, we could grow it. And when we get a house, we can plant it in the yard. Then decorate it for Christmas, outside. No needles or sap inside.”

She turned fully around in his arms and looked into his big hazel eyes. He was trying to read her face. She kept it completely still, and then kissed him soundly on the lips. That one kiss, turned into many more. In between kisses she told him “it’s,” kiss, “fucking,” kiss, “perfect.” Sleep completely gone, and tossed away like their shirts were. Her hands were everywhere. He was undoing the drawstring on her pants, when she froze, “wait, and the tree for the living room?”

“Whatever you want.” 

“No, you have to love it too. Pick it with me.” 

He pressed a loving kiss in between her eyes, and then on her nose, “I don’t think the stores are open right now.” She rolled her eyes at him, and pinched his nipple. 

“Hey!” his eyes darkened and they went back to kissing.

For the second time this morning, she woke in his embrace. His chest was rising and falling steadily in such a soothing manner. She wanted to let it bring her back into a deep sleep, but she wanted to find that ornament. Standing from the couch, she was met with chilly air. She threw on her pajamas and covered Shawn tightly with the blanket. She wandered into the kitchen with her phone and texted her mom. 

iMessage to Mom: Do you still have that ornament you got me? The bauble?

Thankfully her mom was an early riser and replied immediately.

iMessage from Mom: I packed it in with the bins dad brought over.

iMessage to Mom: I’ll look again

She walked back out to the mess she created earlier, and slowly put the things back into the bin, stopping to look through it as she did. Nothing. 

Shawn sighed from his sleep and turned over on the couch. She looked at him and smiled. He was something else. It was then that she noticed the ornament boxes she had tossed at him before. She smiled at herself. How stupid. She sat on the edge of the couch, careful to not jostle her boyfriend. She picked up the ornaments from the table and looked them over. She quietly laughed at her mom’s gag present.

“What do you think about this one?”

“Babe, that’s hideous.” Shawn was eagerly pointing at a bright yellow tree with sparkly streamers woven into the branches.

“But if we’re going artificial, why not go artificial?”

“I hope you’re joking.”

“Babe, I have no idea what you’re talking about. This is great.” She looked at him with a straight face and he looked right back at her. A smile started to work its way onto her face and they both grinned and broke into laughter. 

“Okay, maybe not.” He grabbed her hand as they strolled through the different varieties of trees.

“What about this?”

“No, it kind of looks like it’s tinged blue.”

“Huh, I see what you mean.”

It took two hours, steamy hot chocolate, and countless kisses, but they found the perfect tree. Then it took another hour to purchase and maneuver the tree home, and then assemble it. They sat admiring the naked tree in the corner, residing where the storage bins had been before. It was beautiful and you really couldn’t tell it was a fake. Shawn kissed her temple. She looked up at him and pulled his head down to kiss him soundly. She pulled away and walked over to the mound of ornaments.

“Remember how I was looking for that bauble this morning –from my mom? She gave it to me right after we started dating.” 

“Yeah, you found it?”

“I did!” She walked back over and passed it to him with a laugh. He took the ball and read the elegant script: Mentally Dating Shawn Mendes.

He laughed, “well, your mom was right. You are mental.” She threw the pillow from off the couch at his head. It hit him squarely in the face, and she cackled, dancing away from his arms. He delicately placed the ornament down, and grabbed her by the waist. He tossed her onto the couch and began to tickle every inch of her. They were both in tears and stitches when they had finally calmed down. Cuddling on the couch, they admired the tree. She stood up, new determination setting in. “Let’s decorate it!”

“Give me a second and I’ll help.” Shawn stood and discreetly picked up the bauble from the coffee table. He went into the kitchen and dug around in the junk drawer for a sharpie. He came back into the living room and hung the bauble on the tree.

“Babe, look at the first ornament up!” She put down the bin she had been going through and looked at the bauble. She laughed and then looked closer noticing it had been written on.

Mentally Dating Married to Shawn Mendes ? 

She gasped and covered her mouth. She could feel her eyes start to prickle. She turned around and saw him on one knee behind her with an open ring box. Her eyes went wide, and the tears came.

“I wasn’t planning on doing it this way, but I-I’m going with it. I love how smart you are, how funny, and beautiful you are. You always keep me on my toes. Even when we fight, I know there’s no one else I would rather be arguing with. I—”he paused overwhelmed with emotion “I—I don’t know what I would do without you in my life. You’re my everything…” He was crying and his voice was cracking. She couldn’t see straight through her own tears. “Will you –will you marry me?”

Part 2

He commanded attention on stage in the corner of the dim bar. A few bandmates joined him, but she couldn’t take her eyes off of him with a guitar securely in his hands. He just looked right.

“Hello, guys. Thanks for coming out tonight.” His eyes scanned over to her still sitting at the bar with G. He winked at her and then grabbed a pick from the mic base.

Her purse began to vibrate and she struggled to open it and silence her phone before it became a distraction.

3 missed calls all from Tom. She sighed heavily through her nose. Later she thought. Later.

The sound of the cords playing made her head snap up. Her phone almost successfully making a dive for the floor.

I wanna follow where she goes.

Fuck me. Fuck me. Oh. My. Fuck. This is on the radio.... his voice. That exact voice. Slightly raspy, strong, enchanting.

This isn’t a cover.

Hearing yet another chuckle at her expense this evening, she turned her head slightly without taking her eyes from the stage, “what?”

“Nothing just enjoying your reaction. So you do know him.” G reached over and grabbed a bottle from behind the bar, and began pouring himself something that smelled strong.

“Hm,” Sure she knew his voice, but she didn’t know him.

“I helped write that song,” he added. She turned fully around to regard him.

“He sometimes gets stuck translating his thoughts into notes. He’s a perfectionist.”

“He’s incredibly talented. You must be too, because this song is,” she paused, “great.” She finished lamely. Great didn’t begin to describe it. She turned back not wanting to miss anything else.

People around the bar perked up at the realization of just who was singing to them. A few people got up and moved to the stage. She silently curse them because they obstructed her view of him. She craned her neck to catch a glimpse of his fingers dancing along the neck of his guitar. He seemed to be driven further by the reaction he received from the slowly growing crowd. He started to bob his head, curls bouncing in time with the beat. Her breathing picked up. It was almost erotic watching him perform. He was so passionate about his music, and you could see it, feel it. She got chills up her spine when he hit a high note. She wasn’t the only one, because some girl shrieked. He didn’t look up at the sound. He only smirked and continued to funnel his energy into those strings.

He played two more songs and then took pictures with the fans surrounding the small stage. It was quite a group, especially considering it was only Tuesday. He was so generous with them, laughing, smiling, making sure there was good lighting. Her cheeks heated again watching him in his element. It was a bit intimidating to watch.

So she turned to G, “when you said you worked together you didn’t mean here.”

“Nah, I have no desire to work behind a bar, I’d rather be drinking in front of it.”

She laughed, and agreed. She was currently waitressing while going through grad school. Being a face in the service industry was tough, add alcohol to that and it could be even worse. The tips made it worth it, but good luck keeping your sanity.

“He does this gig for fun when he’s in town.”

She nodded, “that’s an interesting hobby.”

“Yeah he could do with a few less of those. Hobbies are for when you’re not getting laid regularly.”

She choked at a laugh, and then laughed harder when she saw a hand appear and smack him on the side of his head.

His sparkly eyes appeared beside her, “I’m sorry. He’s an idiot.”

G snorted over his drink and muttered, “the truth hurts.”

Shawn ignored him, “did you enjoy the set?”

“You were incredible,” she had to stop herself from gushing. Being as intoxicated as she was, she wasn’t sure if she pulled it off. He smiled at her. Her phone, still in hand, began going off again.

“Sorry,” she excused herself. Going over to the bathroom she accepted the call without saying anything.

“Jesus Christ! What’s going on? Where are you!?”

“I’m out.”

“Why haven’t you been answering my calls?”

“I’m out.” She repeated.

“Are you kidding me? You could’ve at least texted so I knew you were alive.” She felt a bit of regret bubbling up. But why would she have, the last thing he said to her before she left was “fuck you.”

“I’m sorry. I needed to breathe. Listen we’ll talk later. I’m staying at Kate’s tonight.” She felt annoyed at herself as soon as she had apologized. She did that too much. She was allowed to go out, she internally reasoned.

“Fine. You can go home though. I’ll be out with Keira.”

She sighed. Keira was strictly Tom’s friend who pushed way too many buttons. She was glued to Tom at all times and loved to start drama between them.

“I’ll talk to you later.” She hung up and looked over to where G and Shawn were standing. They both had on their coats and were looking at the commotion at the door where a lot of people were now waiting to enter. Catching Shawn’s sparkly eyes again, her cheeks heated. They both headed over to her with her jacket and bag in tow.

“I didn’t want to leave it.” He said handing over her things over. Their fingers brushed and she felt stupidly giddy.

“Thank you.” Surprised at his thoughtfulness.

“Did you want to join us? We’re gonna grab food at a diner a few blocks over.”

“I’d love to.”

“Alright let’s get a move on, I think they’re gonna meet up with us there.” G added to Shawn and started to lead us towards the back door.

They were met with a wall of icy air as they exited the bar.

“Did you call a car?” G asked.

“Yeah, it should be—here.” A black car pulled up to the exit. She froze for a second. This situation was everything her mother had ever drilled into her head about what not to while out drinking. Don’t go alone. Don’t leave the bar with multiple people you don’t know. Don’t get into a stranger’s car, especially while drunk.

Part 7

I did not proof read, sorry. Hope you enjoy -xx. 

Ryan was at work in the lobby of the building when they entered. She gave him a half wave and followed Shawn to the elevators. 

“Déjà vu,” she said as they got onto the lift. 

He smiled and rumpled his hair again. Watching him readjust his snapback after the process, she had a strong desire to steal it from him. Her fingers twitched. He silently eyed her while they waited to reach his floor. She met his gaze. His eyebrow lifted ever so slightly, and the edges of his lips quirked. From his small movement, she felt like a balloon of air was expanding in her belly. She ducked her head and examined the floor. His ankles were crossed as he leaned against the wall. He was wearing running sneakers and his calves were still exposed. She felt her nerves simmer in her lower belly.

The elevator dinged and he held his arm in front of the door, holding it open for her to exit first. She paused just outside not knowing which way to turn. Shawn led her down the hallway to the right and opened the last door in the corridor.

“Come on in, make yourself at home,” he turned the light on and tossed his keys onto a table by the front door. 

He led her into the kitchen and offered to mix her a drink. She asked if he had a signature drink and to make that.

“Don’t chip these countertops. They’re really nice,” she teased. 

He paused opening the cabinet and shot her a look that made her painfully aware of the pace of her heartbeat. He turned back around and stretched to reach a cocktail glass from a higher shelf. She watched the muscles in his back pull the shirt taut. Her cheeks heated and she busied herself by taking her coat off and glanced around the open concept living area. It was beautifully decorated. There were a few pictures near the TV. Wandering closer, she giggled at a photo of him goofing off with his family. It was the kind of moment captured that when you looked back on it, you couldn’t help but have a crinkly smile from the radiating joy. There were other photos of him with people she didn’t recognize. He looked good and the heat only increased in her cheeks. Music filled the apartment, it was something soft. She could feel him behind her. He reached around her and pointed to a photo of himself at the beach with people she didn’t recognize. 

“This is the friend who’s counter I broke,” his arm stayed half snaked around her body and with his other hand he passed her the drink he mixed. 

She took it from his grasp and hesitated. She could easily see how this situation could go in many different directions, and she found herself longing for those directions. Something was holding her back, so instead she found herself staying facing the photographs and asking, “so how did you end up a sometimes bartender?”

She could hear him smile. He hadn’t moved either. He pointed to another figure in the beach photograph, “G’s cousin owns the bar, and he allows me to bartend if I play occasionally because, apparently, I’m a better singer than bartender.” 

She laughed into her glass, “no, this is good.”

He laughed, “honest?” 

She nodded. It was a bit strong, but she felt like she needed the liquid courage. Her nerves were shot from his presence. 

As if realizing their positioning, he slowly pulled away and she heard him plop on the couch behind her. She immediately missed his warmth. Giving the photographs one last glance, she turned around and met his eyes. A grin slowly stretched across her face. He was eyeing her slowly as if trying to figure something out. He sipped his drink never taking his eyes off her. Following his lead, she had more of her drink. It coated her throat and her mind. She walked with purpose to the couch and seated herself close to him.

**

“What the fuck happened last night?” Kate was practically shouting through the phone.

“Mmmm, not so loud,” she groaned rubbing her eyes until she saw spots.

“What happened?” Kate demanded, “you didn’t come home.” 

“I did, but not until late… or early depending on how you look at it.”

“Stop teasing. What happened?”

“Nothing. Really, honestly, nothing interesting.”

“What does that mean?”

She laughed, “exactly what it sounds like, Kate. Listen, I’m playing hooky today because I got in so late. Meet you for lunch?”

Kate sighed, “no Joe and I have a meeting with the boss man.”

She smirked, “boss man? How old are you?”

“Shut up. I have a working lunch today, but dinner! Dinner you need to spill your guts.”

She hung up with Kate and rolled onto her back. She stared at the chipped ceiling paint in Kate’s living room. 

Last night was incredible. They got drunk, and talked, just talked. She had never before met someone who was that easy to talk to. He was an incredible listener. He had been turned facing her with one arm resting on the back of the couch and the other clutching his drink. The entire time fully engaged in what she was saying. His rosy cheeks and wet lips stole her words a few times, but he didn’t remark at her sudden distraction. He would prod her on with a question.

When she started to realize again just how much she had been talking, she started to question him about his life. He had been hesitant at first to truly open up, so she placed her hand on his knee to reassured him that he didn’t have to answer and that she was sorry if she had been too forward. This gesture was enough to reassure him about her character, because after that, he was the one who couldn’t stop talking. If he was an incredible listener, then he was an even better conversationalist. He was so eloquent in his beliefs about life, and was a talented story teller. She was enraptured. He became so excited about certain things and she could honestly listen to him all day talk about his passions. He would talk faster, make gestures with his hands, and run his fingers through his horrible hat hair. It only made him that much more endearing. Laughing together with him felt so right in her bones and something inside felt settled, felt right.

When he had gotten up to refill their drinks, there was a moment when Tom popped into her head. She felt guilty sitting here so comfortably so soon after everything had ended with him. But the feeling soon vanished, she was not cheating on him. She really didn’t have any romantic feelings left for him. She had every right to be here, so she pushed it from her mind as Shawn sat back down next to her. He handed her another drink. As she put the drink to her lips, she felt any residual reservations about being here with Shawn dissipate with the burning sensation gliding down her throat. 

Her phone alarm broke through her musings on her evening and early morning with the curly haired man. She turned it off and rolled over again. Might as well sleep in if she was skipping classes today. Just as she was putting her phone down a text alert came in.

iMessage from SM: You left your jacket here.

iMessage to SM: Isn’t that technically yours?

iMessage from SM: What did you wear home in the Uber? I shouldn’t have let u go. It was so late. You should’ve stayed in the guest room.

Her fingers paused over her keyboard and she allowed herself to embrace the giddy feeling bubbling.

iMessage to SM: Why, would you have made breakfast?

iMessage from SM: I would’ve burnt the condo down

iMessage to Shawn: Didn’t you tell me you could learn anything from YouTube?

iMessage from SM: Next time stay and I’ll give it a go

Part 5. I struggled with this one a little bit. Shawn is not in this part that much (sorry), but he will be everywhere in the next one. I would love to know your thoughts! Let me know if you want to be added to the tag list! -xx.

She luckily had a few seconds to calm her heart rate before Kate had met her at the elevator bank with Joe. They showed her the pristine apartment and then talked briefly about the price and utilities. Kate could leave her current apartment at the end of November because her lease was monthly. This meant they could be moving in within two weeks.

After viewing his apartment, she and Kate walked over to Bee’s for a bite and to discuss everything. 

“I don’t know, Kate. It’s beautiful, but I’m not gonna lie. Living with Joe might be weird.” She picked up a french fry— her current stress level was high.

“Okay, that’s fair. Why don’t we invite Joe out to dinner sometime this week? And you can get a chance to know him more. That way you can see if living with him is a possibility.” 

Kate took a bite of her burger. It had been too big of a bite because some ketchup ran down her cheek. She grabbed for the stack of napkins on the table and they were knocked onto the floor. She watched the mess happen and gave a half smile at Kate’s mess. 

Kate was rather clumsy. Although she couldn’t talk because she was just as bad, which is part of the reason they got along so well in college. Moving into her dorm a few years ago had been hectic and sweaty. The lines for the elevator to get up to the dorm were ridiculous. Not wanting to wait and ignoring the heat, her dad convinced her that they could make it up the stairs without a problem. So, with her father in the lead, they dragged her two suitcases up four flights of stairs. She was trailing behind, and it was a good thing she was not in front of her father. By the time she made it to the fourth floor landing, her sweaty grip hadn’t held and her suitcase tumbled down the stairs. Flinging her super plus tampons (not the cute little ones), thongs, period granny panties, bras, and her stuffed animal, Elliot, all over the stairwell. She had lost her footing when the suitcase went down, but luckily her father was agile and grabbed her arm before she took a tumble too. Kate happened to be on the third-floor landing when her things rained down like confetti. She caught her suitcase from passing the third floor, but in doing so, sent her box of DVDs down the stairs. The only casualty of the whole ordeal was Love Actually, which she replaced for Kate the same day. Their first encounter had been quite memorable-– “here are your tampons.” “Thanks, and here’s My Bloody Valentine.” The irony hadn’t been lost on her.

“Hmm,” she played with the half grilled cheese left on her plate.

“Hey, what’s up?” Kate inquired noting her mood. 

“It sounds great, Kate.” She said halfheartedly and dropped the fry to her plate.

“No, what’s really bothering you? You were pretty quiet back at the apartment.”

“I-I-I’m feeling so many different emotions right now, and I don’t know how to process it all. I’m sorry. I do want to meet up with Joe. I think it’ll be good,” she took a breath, “I just… Tom, and Shawn, and grad school…”

“I know. It’s a lot.”

“It is a lot. Is it weird that I don’t feel as sad about Tom as I thought I was going to?”

Kate wiped her fingers on a napkin rescued from the floor and picked up a fry, “No, you were mentally mourning that relationship long before it was officially over.  

“You missed some,” she pointed to Kate’s ketchup cheek, “and yeah, but we were engaged. Don’t get me wrong. I’m sad and I do miss him, but not in the way I thought I would.”

“What? More like he was a friend than a boyfriend?”

“Kind of, I guess so.”

“It wasn’t a healthy relationship in the end.”

“No, it really wasn’t,” she continued to play with her grilled cheese.

“And Keira did nothing to help that,” Kate added, “you dodged a bullet.”

She forcefully snorted, “psycho.” 

Keira and Tom had “dated” in fourth grade. It lasted for two weeks, and yet that was a fact that Keira felt the need to bring up every single time they were all together. She felt compelled to tell her that she knew Tom better, and would make jokes about how she had him first. No one thought any of this was funny except for Tom. Keira, in his eyes, could do no wrong, and it was a fight they had a few too many times.

She added, “maybe Keira will finally make moves.”

Kate paused, “I wouldn’t be surprised if she already has, or maybe not. Maybe it was only fun because she got to torment you. I don’t remember her being as clingy with Tom when you weren’t around.”

She rolled her eyes, “it’s in the past.”

Kate nodded in agreement with her mouth full.

“Oh, call Joe, and invite him out to dinner on Friday. I think it’s a good idea.” 

The side door to Bee’s opened, the bells attached to the frame twinkled. Into the warmth came G and a beautiful blonde woman. It was undeniably G, if nothing else, the height and the beard gave him away. The couple sat in a booth across the diner. She eagerly looked at the door again, hoping that just maybe he’d appear too. 

“What,” Kate probed. Her cheeks heated at the realization that she was half standing from her seat to get a better view. Kate leaned over and stuck her head in the aisle of the diner to look at what had her so preoccupied. 

“Who is that?”

“That’s G, and I think, his girlfriend.”

Kate went back to her burger, “the one who was drugged?”

“Shh,” her eyes widened looked around to see if anyone overheard their discussion.

“Oh, come off it. They’re all the way over there.”

“Kate,” she warned. 

Kate smirked at her paranoia, “okay. I’m sorry. So now what happened again?”

“I’m not entirely sure what happened, other than that she’s okay,” she practically whispered.

“How’d you hear that?”

“Shawn told me,” she lowered her voice again and this time Kate laughed, “stop mocking me.” She whined and Kate laughed harder.

“Wait a second. Shawn told you?”

Her cheeks colored almost immediately, and her face felt hot. Internally, she cursed her genetics for making her so easy to read. Kate smirked, “ah, so you bumped into him? Where?”

“He actually lives in the same building as Joe.”

“No way. We need to move in then!” 

“What? That cannot be the reason we decide to make a thousand-dollar decision.”

“It’s not the only reason! But oh, come on, think about how fun and easy that relationship would be.” 

She giggled softly, allowing herself to think about Kate’s suggestion, at the thought of creeping up in the middle of the night to see him. Him bringing food by when she was too lazy to move. Stealing his jacket. Maybe have some of her reoccurring dreams like the one from this morning actually transpire. It would be just an elevator ride…Her smile stilled and she looked at her left ring finger which was resting on her mug of hot chocolate. She barely knew Shawn, and she had literally just gotten out of a relationship in which she had been engaged. Was it too soon to even be joking about moving on? She didn’t even know if Shawn really liked her or if he was just being friendly. She ran her fingers along the rim of her mug.

Kate reached out and put her hand on her arm, stopping her trailing fingers. “Hey,” Kate said softly, “what’s going on in your head?”

“It’s just –—“ The front door of Bee’s chimed announcing another patron’s entrance. They didn’t have a clear of a view of the front door from their booth. The figure was wearing a snapback and running shorts. Whoever it was, was extremely tall. Kate looked round at the sound too, “I call dibs on this one. You can have Shawn.” 

She laughed, “what about Joe?”

“What about him? We’re not dating.”

The man walked over to G’s booth and sat. She felt a giggle bubble up at the absurdity of her life, and pulled her leaning body back into the booth, away from any prying eyes that might see her in the aisle. She couldn’t stop laughing. Kate looked confused. 

“That is Shawn,” she breathed out and let out another chuckle, “sorry. I- it just took us weeks to bump into each other and now I’m seeing him everywhere.”

Kate smiled at her, and pointed her hamburger at her, “it’s a sign. Go over there.”

She shook her head and bit into her now cool grilled cheese causing her to grimace, “no let’s just finish our dinner and maybe I’ll say goodbye.”

“Why are you being weird?” Kate tossed a fry at her. It hit her shoulder bounced onto her plate. 

She picked it up and took a bite, “I’m not being weird. I just don’t want him to think I’m stalking him.”

“Girl, that doesn’t even make sense. Why would he think that?”

Her phone vibrated on the table. She flipped it over.

iMessage from (xxx)xxx-xxxx: Picture attachment.

Kate leaned over the table to see the message and laughed, “looks like he’s the one giving off stalker vibes.” 

The photo was of Kate tossing a fry at her in their booth. It was clearly taken from across the diner.

iMessage from (xxx)xxx-xxxx: I spy a jacket thief

She poked her head out from the booth again and laughed when she made eye contact with him. He looked… hot. His curls were spilling from under the snapback, and his cheeks were rosy. He looked like he just came from a run. He was grinning widely at her, and when she poked her head out, he stood and made his way over with a water bottle in hand. 

Her eyes widened slightly and she pulled back into the booth a bit – feeling terrified and elated. Kate was still staring at Shawn, and under her breath appraisingly whispered, “fuck.”

He stopped at their table and smiled warmly at her, “long time.”

“Too long,” she found herself smiling back. It had only been a few hours.

Kate grabbed her purse, and scooted to the end of the booth to stand, “well, I hate to leave, but I have to finish all that paperwork for my current lease. Maybe you can find someone here to keep you company.” She teased and pulled her coat on. Shawn introduced himself to Kate with a smile.

“I’m Kate. Think you can take on this awful task of keeping her company while I’m gone?”

“Eh, I don’t know,” Shawn looked over at her still sitting in the booth. Her heart jumped. 

“I mean, she is quite low maintenance. Occasionally requires wine and chocolate, but mostly she’s self-sufficient,” Kate joked.

“Toilet trained,” He looked back at Kate for an answer.

“Hey!” she called from her spot in the booth. They all laughed. 

Kate put her scarf on, “nice meeting you,” she directed at Shawn, “see you at home.” Kate gave her a pointed look that said she wanted details later.

Let me know if you want to be added to the tag list! -xx.

New to posting my work. Writing is an outlet for my stress. -- xx.

“We are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master.”

—Ernest Hemingway

Bar Musings (First Piece) - Not Complete

She sits alone at a bar mulling over her current mess of a love life when a chance encounter takes her by surprise.

 Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7

Thanksgiving Blurb

Sometimes holidays are hard. Having someone to hold your hand through it all helps. Light and Fluffy. (Blurb)

The Christmas Tree

Part 3

I’m surprising myself by how quickly I’m writing this.

In the darkness of the car, she began to sober up a bit. Some of the fogginess began to clear, but she was still in no state to operate any vehicle. She was starting to question her decision— it’s a weekday, and here she was drunk with strangers, granted they were both kind and attractive, but strangers nonetheless. Shawn and G were chatting with the driver about the weather and the upcoming holidays. The mundaneness soothed some of her nerves about her decision. She then took her phone out to texted Kate and saw that she had a message from her.

iMessage From Kate: Hey, love! I’m sorry he’s such a dick. You’re wonderful, and we can eat junk and I have wine, and we can do nails. I’m getting off from my shift in 20!

iMessage to Kate: Please. That sounds amazing. I’m out grabbing food with some guys I met at the bar lol... call me when you’re out!

She put her phone in her pocket. They pulled up to the diner in no time. She flushed looking at exactly which diner they had chosen. This diner happened to be her diner. This was where she waitressed 5-6 nights a week, and on her off days or breaks, where she did her homework. Fuck. She silently wished Marco wasn’t working. He teased her relentlessly, and could be a bit much on the best of days.

“I think the coast is clear,” G said from the front seat, probably referring to the lack of fans. He got out of the car first.

“Thank you so much,” she said to the driver and began to dig into her purse for her wallet to tip the man. From the backseat, Shawn shook the driver’s hand and passed him some folded bills.

“I got it,” he lowered his voice to her, and got out of his side of the car. He held it open for her. She scooted over and stumbled out. He steadied her by holding onto her arm. She blushed again.

“I’m normally not this bad, and I swear it’s not still the wine.”

He smiled, “I’m sure.” She wasn’t quite sure if he was agreeing because he believed her or was just humoring her.

They headed towards the diner, where through the slightly steamed window, they could make out G sitting at a table. They strolled slowly towards the door, ignoring the cool air.

“I’m glad you came.”

“I am too.”

He hesitated, “I’m sure the company helps too after your breakup.”

She felt strangely disappointed that the conversation involved Tom in some capacity, “it does, and you and G are funny. He was telling me about you at the bar.”

“Ahh, don’t listen to him.”

“No, no. It wasn’t anything bad.”

“I don’t know if I believe you,” he said with a chuckle.

“Well, he was joking around a bit, but it really wasn’t anything to be worried about.”

“So bartending,” she added.

“It’s a lot of fun. I’m not great, but I’m getting better. The first cocktail I made, I got the shaker stuck on the glass, and I panicked a bit and smacked it a bit too hard on the edge of the counter,” he paused.

“Oh no, tell me you didn’t break the glass,” she laughed kindly.

“No, I chipped the counter,” he sheepishly grinned and she almost snorted, “I was learning in my friend’s apartment kitchen, and the counter was made of that compressed wood stuff.”

“Oh my god! What did she say?”

“He was drunk and thought it was hilarious. I paid to fix the counter the next morning.”

They reached the diner doors and he held it open for her. She was disappointed the diner wasn’t farther away, and her stomach clenched at the thought of her coworkers seeing her, but she held her head high and walked inside.

G was sitting at table 18, the large corner table that could seat 10 comfortably. He was alone with a mug in front of him already, and his phone glued to his ear.

She led the way, glancing quickly around to see who was on tonight. No one was in the dining room at the moment. She sat to G’s left. Shawn took his jacket off and hung it on the back of his chair before sitting. While he was, she took a moment to shamelessly look him over. His shirt had opened a button on the ride over, and his chain was more visible. The contrast of his skin and the chain gave her slight chills. His chest and arms were massive, but not in an off putting way. He looked like he could take care of himself if he got into a scrap, though she doubted he would ever need to, and yet he still managed to look so, so completely... cuddly.

She felt warm and needed to look away as he sat down next to her. G tilted his phone away from his mouth and whispered that it was his girlfriend and she was drunk.

Shawn grabbed the small milks on the table for G’s coffee, and began to stack them. She smiled at his antics and then began to help him build a tower. It got quite high and then G blew on the tower, with his phone still on his ear. The tower crumbled. She laughed, and Shawn whined, “dude, not cool.”

Tracy, the middle aged mother of three, appeared without looking up from her notepad, “hi, I’m Tracy. Welcome to Bee’s Diner. Can I get you guys a coffee? Fries?” She had bags under her eyes. She sympathized with Tracy, Tuesday and Thursday evening shifts were always the dodgiest, and add raising teenage sons into the mix.

“I’m okay with water, and,” he turned to her.

“Hey Trace, I’ll have a water too.”

“Oh! How are you dear,” she finally glanced up. She blushed, but knew Tracey meant well. Tracey knew all about Tom. She was a motherly figure who was fantastic at listening and giving advice.

“Uh, good.” Tracey, bless her, didn’t mention anything. She looked over G and Shawn assessing them with new eyes.

“Two waters, and your usual?” Tracey asked with her pen in hand. When she wasn’t waitressing, she was often found in booth 13 with textbooks and her laptop. She’d always order a big bowl of soup and a grilled cheese, and depending on her stress level either a basket of fries or a bowl of fruit.

She smiled at Tracy, “just the soup today.” Tracy smiled, “and for you boys?” Shawn was staring at her like he was trying to figure something out. “I’ll have what she’s having.”

G put his hand over the mouth piece and ordered a burger.

Tracey collected the unused menus from the table, “I’m glad to see you out with someone besides Kate. You’re waiting on a few more?”

“Uh, I’m not sure,” she looked at Shawn for confirmation.

“Yeah, I think so.”

Tracey nodded leaving two of the menus behind, and went to sort out their order with the kitchen.

Shawn turned to her, “Kate’s your—ex?”

She smiled, “no still current, best friend.” He nodded, and brought his hands back to the milks. She went back to helping him, “she’s getting off from work soon actually.”

“Yeah? What’s she do?”

“She’s an ER nurse.”

“That’s awesome. Does she happen to watch Grey’s?”

She laughed, “no she refuses actually. She doesn’t want to start comparing her life to Meredith’s.”

“Do you watch it?”

“I stopped after Izzie’s storyline with Denny. It was too much for my emotions.”

“That’s so early though!”

“I know, I just couldn’t keep watching.” Her phone went off.

She pulled her phone out, “speak of the devil.”

iMessage From Kate: Girlfriend!!!! I hope you’re being smart!! Where are you? What are their names? I’m gonna be a littler late because my boss sucks, but if you need me I’ll leave now.

iMessage to Kate: I am, and I’m okay! We’re at Bee’s. Their names are Shawn and G.

iMessage From Kate: What the hell of a name is G? And last names? What if I need to track one of them down?

She snorted and apologized to Shawn as she typed out her response, “I’m sorry. I try not to be on my phone when I’m with other people, but we’re meeting up after her shift.”

“Oh no worries at all. Does she want us to order her something?”

iMessage to Kate: I’m fine and you won’t need to track me down! Do you need me to fake an emergency so you can leave? They work you too hard.

“Great idea, I’ll ask.” She was surprised again by his generosity, but shouldn’t have been. He had been extremely thoughtful the entire evening.

“She won’t be here for a bit, but I’ll order her pancakes when she’s leaving the hospital.”

He nodded and continued to work on the milk tower.

“Fuck, where?!” G sat up straight. Her and Shawn’s heads snapped up to look at G. “Alright. Breathe. I’ll come to get you. Stay on the phone with me.”

G looked over to Shawn, “your apartment’s a few blocks over? Your car is there right, not at your parents?”

“Yeah, what’s going on?”

“Can you bring me to get C—- what?” G turned his attention back to his phone and urgently added, “we’re on our way.”

“Some creepy guy is there slipping things into drinks. She’s locked herself in the bathroom.” G snapped.

Shawn quickly stood pushing his chair back. He dug for his wallet, “shit, I’m out of cash.”

“I’ve got it. Don’t worry about it,” she stood too and reached for her own purse, “go, don’t worry about this.”

G was already at the door of the diner, “Shawn!”

He looked back at her, “thanks, I-I’ll text you.” And rushed out the door.

She let out a breath and sat down. She hoped G’s girlfriend would be okay.

Then a terrible and selfish thought crept into her mind, he didn’t have her cell phone number...

She looked around hoping he’d pop back in and magically give it to her. Realizing how ridiculous of a thought it was, she sighed at herself. That’s when she noticed he left his jacket behind. She grabbed it off the back of his chair. She held it for a moment hoping it would somehow give her an answer as towards how to contact him. Accepting defeat, she laid it on her lap and pulled out her wallet to pay Tracey. Digging for her credit card, her heart jumped, “oh fuck,” she said aloud.

“What’s the matter? Where’d everyone go?” Tracey appeared with the waters and extra napkins.

“They had an emergency.” She sounded sad to her own ears, and added “and I left my tab open at the bar. I don’t have my credit card.”

Tracey sat down at the table and patted her arm, “it’s alright. I know where you work. Now what’s this about an emergency.”

**

She left the diner with all the food packed up, and a promise to pay and tip Tracey well for the nutty evening. She headed towards the bar to retrieve her card, and silently prayed that no one had taken it or used it in her absence.

The chilly air blew up her thin jacket and made her shiver. Her skin felt icy. She glanced down at his jacket. It was warming the arm it was draped over. She hesitated. He would never know if she put it on, and it was freezing, she talked herself into it. She put the food down on the sidewalk and slid her arms into the sleeves of the denim jacket. Her hands didn’t make it out of the sleeves, she rolled them a bit. She felt small wearing his clothes. Feeling toasty, she picked up the food and continued walking. A big gust of wind blew, and she buried her nose into the jacket. Mmm, it smelled like cologne. Her heart jumped, and she took a moment to inhale the jacket again. Remembering herself, she glanced around looking to see if anyone had watched her. She was alone. This was not even close to how she imagined this evening transpiring. Shaking her head at her actions, she decided to phone Kate to let her know what happened and that she needed to be picked up from the bar.

The bar came back into sight and the lines outside were insane. There appeared to be tons of teenage fan girls waiting to see if their idol was still inside. She walked up to the bouncer and got yelled at by fans waiting in line. She ignored the calls and told the bouncer her dilemma. He called inside to the bar, and then nodded, allowing her back into the warmth.

She went up to the bar and asked the bartender for her card, “there was no tab open. It was just left here.”

“No tab?” She was confused.

“No” shouted the bartender over the music. She took her card and put it back into her wallet. Shawn must not have charged her for anything. She felt strangely guilty and made a mental note to leave a large tip the next time she was back with cash. She wandered over to the window and peered out at the crowd that was slowly disbursing, just then Kate called, “I’m outside, by the girl holding a ‘the Future Mrs. Mendes’ poster. I wonder if he’s in the area because this is insane!”

She laughed and dashed outside to Kate’s beat up Honda. Climbing into the passenger seat, she was immediately assaulted with a hug.

“How are you?” Kate breathed.

How was she? She knew Kate was referring to the Tom situation, but right now all she could focus on was the disappointment of not being able to contact Shawn again.