#loveproble

Something always switch on in his mind, when he offers to pay for everything.   I don’t know if it’s the way he touches my hair, or suddenly stops me from crossing the road. I just feel like melting butter whenever he looks at me.

I feel like humans have such high expectations of relationships, of partners, of friends. When I look at the mirror I see a girl who wants to make him jealous, who wants him to be like “ stop talking about your exes, jun-san and all these freaking guys who touched you in the past. Be mine”

Be mine. Can you really belong to another human being? Am I ready to fully trust him and let go of the walls, the fear, the suspicion, the mind games and give myself to him? No, I’m not.

There are still many questions marks in my life, where will I live? Will I have a proper job? Will I marry and have kids? Maybe I can’t even have kids? I cannot let go of the question “ what if” but still I’m selfish and I want him to be absolutely and incredibly into me. That’s my flaw.