#longishpost

Watched Across the Spiderverse, got hooked, wrote fic, made fanart that went with fic. Tale as old as time. Enjoy!

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Dammit.

Dammit!

Gwen threw her mask off on what should have been Miles’ bed. Her Miles’ bed. But it wasn’t, just like all the other ones she’d tried and tried for hours. It wasn’t like Miles would only be in his room, or his apartment. He could be anywhere in New York. God, he could be anywhere in New York. How could she have been so stupid?

Before, she could sense him from universes away. Now, she couldn’t sense him at all. 

You were right, Gwen.

You should have never come to see me. 

Gwen bit back tears. The look he’d given her before falling off the highway in Nueva York was burned into her memory. He was mad at her, he had been betrayed by her, and she couldn’t fucking find him. He was in danger, and she would be the last person he would reach to for help. 

Bzzzzzzzzzz.

She jumped out of her stupor. This was a familiar spidey-sense-buzz, Miles was here! He— 

Wait. 

No, he wasn’t. 

Her heart sank. It was close, tantalizingly close. But it wasn’t Miles. This was a different spider’s signal. 

“—someone in there.”

And they were coming this way.

Though it was late, she couldn’t just blend into the shadows. Miles’ room was all packed up, his furniture wrapped in plastic, his action figures stuffed into boxes. It wasn’t like she could turn invisible. New plan: she scrambled to the window, fiddling for the lock — and came up empty. But this window opens. She’d opened it before, and this was the exact same— no, it wasn’t. 

“—my old room—”

It wasn’t the exact same place, it was an alternate dimension. Of course. And in this specific dimension, the windows don’t open, so she’ll never be able to make it out before—

“Excuse me?”

BZZZZZZZZZZZ!!

Her fellow spiders had arrived. Standing in the doorway was a woman in her late twenties, with longish bleach-blonde hair, and a man about the same age with thick locs and glasses. Who looked exactly like Miles. 

A little too much like Miles.

“Whoa.” The man looked shocked. “Another Spider-Person! You look… exactly like Gwen. Why do you look exactly like Gwen? Did you have a sister you never told me about, or—”

“No, of course not.” The woman — also Gwen, said, assessing the situation. She was also named Gwen? She kinda looked like her… wait, if he looked and sounded a lot like Miles, and she looked and sounded a lot like Gwen, then…

Oh, god. It was her and Miles. From an alternate dimension. 

“I’m not crazy, right? You see it too?” The man, no, Other-Miles, gestured with his hands just like her Miles did. Does. 

“Yep,” she said. She turned her attention back to Gwen. “Sorry, are you… me?”

“Yes! And also no.” She shuffled her feet, not knowing what else to do. “So, yeah. I am Gwen Stacy, Spider-Woman… from a different dimension.”

A moment of silence. They looked at each other. They looked back at her. “Oh. Okay.”

“Wow, you guys are remarkably chill with this.”

Other-Miles put a hand around Other-Gwen’s waist. A pang of feelings hit Gwen’s gut like a brick. He could just do that in this universe? “Well,” he said, “we’ve been Spider-Man and Woman for like… twelve years now, so we’re used to weird shit.”

“Yep.”

“Cool, um… so, I’m sure you both are wondering why I’m here right now,” she said with half-assed finger guns.

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“Okay, so.” She sat crosslegged on the room’s bed. “Multiverse is real. A bunch of Spider-people from a whole bunch of universes got together to protect the multiverse.”

Other-Miles sits beside her. “And they didn’t invite us?”

…

Even he got a watch?

God, even though he’s half-joking, Other-Miles’ questioning almost makes Gwen burst into tears. Of course every multiversal version of Miles Morales wants to be invited. Wants to be visited. Wanted to know why his friends didn’t visit. 

Other-Gwen raises an eyebrow. Gwen swallows hard, willing her eyes to stop burning. “Only issue, the leader of this alliance is this guy named Miguel, who is insane. He’s so scared of disrupting the multiverse, when it’s really this guy, Spot, who does it with his portals. Spot is this villain guy, by the way. Ruptures holes in space-time. Anyway, Miles…” 

Other-Miles squints quizzically. She swallows hard. “My Miles isn’t even from my dimension. I accidentally got launched into his through science shenanigans, we met, and we just… clicked.”

Other-Gwen sits at Other-Miles’ feet, holding his hands. “That sounds awfully familiar.” 

He laughs. Gwen hurts a little more. 

“But we were separated. Each back to our own universe. Anyway, months pass. My dad tried to… arrest me after I revealed my spider-ness to him, and I was terrified, but Miguel took me in. I got a watch that let me transport between universes, and… and I wanted to visit Miles so badly… but I didn’t.”

Gwen covered her mouth and turned away. Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry. 

“Why not?” It was Other-Gwen. She'd laid a hand on her knee, ready to listen. 

God, she's a saint.

“Because Miguel said he was an anomaly, and I wasn’t allowed to,” Gwen said, choking up. “He wasn’t supposed to be Spider-Man in his universe, even though he’s a great Spiderman.” Her floodgates open. “Like, he’s just so kind, and gentle, and he puts other people before himself, sometimes too much, and he’s just so sweet.” 

Gwen sobbed for a moment. She caught the two of them exchanging another glance. They each took one of her hands, and Other-Miles slides off the bed to match his partner. 

“And I had that watch for months and I didn’t visit him. Then, when I finally did, I didn’t tell him why I didn’t visit, or that I was actually on a mission or anything. I just showed up, and, and he looked so happy, but when he stood up to Miguel and stuff he found out everything, and he, he…” Gwen wiped her tears on her shoulder. “You should have seen how hurt he looked. I’ve given him so much pain. I even chased him, tried to get him put in jail because he was an anomaly, and that’s just what happens to anomalies. He was one of the best friends I’ve ever had, and I just… I just chased him. Didn’t go to him when he needed me most, didn’t support him when he needed me most, and now, he’s somewhere in the multiverse, and he’s in danger, and I can’t find him, and I don’t know if he’d even want me looking for him!”

Gwen ripped her hands from theirs and pounded the bed before curling into a ball and grabbing her hair. “I’m such an idiot. I… I don’t know where he is, or if he’s safe or anything. Maybe he won’t even talk to me…”

In every other universe, Gwen Stacy falls for Spider-Man.

Whether she meant falling to her death or falling in love, she wasn’t sure. 

And, in every other universe, it doesn’t end well. 

No, it certainly didn’t.

“I’m so sorry,” Other-Miles said after a little while. “C’mere.”

Then, Other-Miles and Other-Gwen took her by the forearms, pulled her off the bed, and into a hug.

Gwen couldn't help but collapse. 

After so many hours of tension, Gwen finally relaxed. Into the hug, and into her sobs. They just held her and held her as she cried and cried. Something inside Gwen rejected this. She doesn’t deserve kindness, not after everything she’s done. Miles needs this hug much more than she does. Wherever the hell he is. 

If he lets her, she would want to hug him exactly like this. 

Other-Gwen rubbed circles on her back. “You must have been holding onto this for a long time. You must be so scared.”

Gwen just nods. 

Other-Gwen leans out of the hug. “Why don’t we figure it out over some tea?”

Gwen wiped away her tears, finally taking in the world around her. “Isn’t it, like, midnight for you guys right now?”

“Nah, it’s about eleven.” Other-Miles hopped to his feet and twirled towards the door, finger-guns blazing. “Don’t worry, I’ll make the two of us decaf.” 

————————--

“Kingpin brought you to his world?” Other-Gwen said, listening intently. The two of them had insisted she stayed for a while and tell them her whole life story, despite her protests that she clearly must keep going, and no, she’s not going to burn out, thank you very much.

“Yep! I mean, he ran the supercollider. He didn’t mean to bring me in. Anyway, somehow, when I was launched from the portal, I emerged into Miles’ dimension a week before the collider had even run.”

“You time-travelled?” Other-Miles’ voice echoed from the kitchen.

“I guess? I still have no idea how it happened. But I appear in this new dimension, and, of course, I have no idea what happened or what to do. So, I let my spidey-sense guide me.”

“Spideysense?” Other-Gwen asked.

From the kitchen: “I told you that was a good name for it!”

“Yeah, the entire rest of the Spiderverse calls it spidey-sense.”

“Fine, you win this one. We’ll call it spidey-sense.” Other-Gwen sighed. “Am I the only one who feels like this is ridiculous?”

“Yup,” he said, popping the p. “Continue, little Gwen.”

“Little Gwen?”

“Yeah, to differentiate."

“I’m not little,” she said with a huff. “I’m sixteen.”

“Well, I’m twenty-five, so… little Gwen.” She patted her head. 

Is it too early for me to want her to adopt me so BADLY? 

“You were saying, you travelled back in time, didn’t know what to do,—”

“Yeah, and so, I let my spidey-sense guide me to this one hoity-toity academy in Brooklyn… you guys have Brooklyn, right? Yeah, so I’m just at this academy and…” She tucked some hair behind her ear. “I meet him. Miles. He was funny and kind, and… like I said, we just clicked.”

“And, like I said, sounds awfully familiar.” she said, smiling. “How long have you guys been together for?”

“Oh! Um, we’re not actually together together, y’know? We’re more… friends right now, we haven’t really, um…” her face felt really hot all of a sudden. “Are you two… dating?”

“Dating? We’re not dating.” 

Gwen felt utterly stupid. Then why were they living together? In Miles’ parent’s apartment, no less? Other-Gwen brought her hand up beside her face and wiggled her fingers, showing off a beautiful ring on her—

Oh.

Oh.

“You two are MARRIED?!” Gwen still felt stupid, just in a different way. “You guys can just… live together.” 

“Yeah.”

“And have been for a long time.”

“Our second anniversary is in a month.”

“Without any tragic consequences.”

Other-Gwen raised an eyebrow. “…yes.”

So, all this time, there was a universe where Gwen Stacy and Miles Morales, Spider-Man, lived happily ever after? Where Gwen Stacy survived long enough to get married? Where she never had to worry about being too close to somebody, as it would inevitably end in tragedy?

She hadn’t realized she started crying again until Other-Gwen pulled her in. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

Gwen opened her mouth to speak but figured it wasn’t very helpful to tell this Gwen that most of the multiverse’s Gwen Stacies are dead. “I don’t know,” she settled with, “everything.”

The electric kettle let out a chorus of dings from the kitchen. “Well, if you’re crying at the thought of us getting married,” said Other-Miles, grabbing various tea supplies from the cupboards, “Imagine being me, at the end of that aisle, realizing I was about to marry that goddess of a woman right there.”

Other-Gwen smiled and rolled her eyes. “Honey!”

“What? You were there! I was blubberin’ like a baby! I was tryin’ to hold myself together during the vows but I was really falling apart—”

Gwen slapped a hand on her mouth to stop another sob, which, of course, didn’t work. They were married. They’d made vows to each other. All her guilt somehow swirled into pure heartache.

“Aw, c’mere.” Other-Gwen put her arms around her again. 

Other-Miles appeared with two mugs. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel upset.” He handed her one. “Here.”

Gwen hesitated. “Is this—”

“English Breakfast with a spoonful of honey?”

“How did you know?”

He only smiled. “Plus a squeeze of lemon juice.”

“Why not milk?” Gwen smirked. “I usually have milk?”

Other-Gwen put a hand on her shoulder somberly. “You’re gonna want to lay off the milk around now. Your gut will thank you.”

“But I’m not lactose— I’m not lactose intolerant.”

Other-Gwen grimaced. She brought her voice down to a whisper, “I’m sorry you had to find out this way.”

Gwen took a moment of silence for all the cheeses, yogurts, and other treats she’d have to discontinue from her diet. Then, she realized that was stupid and there were bigger things at stake here. 

They must have also gotten that memo. “Okay,” said Other-Miles, “What’s the plan here, little Gwen?”

She took a sip of her tea. It was perfect. “So, Margo, a.k.a. Spiderbyte, a.k.a. Tech Wiz Extraordinaire, is trying to remotely gain access to the Go-Home Machine’s history in order to find out where Miles went. In the meantime, the group of us have split up in an effort to find him more manually. As evident, it hasn’t worked. So, we’re just gonna keep hoping through universes until we find him.” 

“That’s a good plan…” he said, “I think, I don’t know a few of those words. I was thinking more about the plan of talking to your Miles.”

She sighed. “Yeah, that’s the part I’m sort of dreading.”

“Forgive us for getting to the personal side, but you can’t blame us for really hoping you two work out.” Other-Gwen put down her mug, then clapped her hands. "So, you kept things secret from him. That’s in the past. Can you change the past?”

“…No.”

“What can you change?”

Gwen sighed. “The future.”

“Exactly. I know it’s difficult not to— did you just roll your eyes at me?”

“No, it’s just—”

“Just what?” Other-Gwen raised an eyebrow. It was the Jessica-Jones look, the Rio-Morales look, the look that burned into you from the inside out. 

Gwen pulled into herself. “It’s just that… I don’t know, everyone keeps telling me that. But it doesn’t mean it works.”

“You sure you don’t want to give it another try?”

“Ugh, I’ve already given it a thousand tries.”

Other-Gwen opened her mouth to reprimand but stopped herself with a deep breath. “Okay, if that won’t work, let’s try a different approach. Let’s look at apologizing like it’s…” She scanned the room for inspiration, then lit up. “Like it’s a ballet!” 

She took Gwen’s hands and yanked her to her feet. Twenty-five-year-old Gwen Stacy may have been stockier, but boy, was she buff. Are those the biceps I’m gonna have when I get older? Gwen thought. Damn.

“Okay. Imagine you’re onstage, or in the studio, whatever makes you more comfortable.”

Gwen started stretching from top to bottom in a routine she’d done a million times. She hadn’t done ballet in a while, being Spider-Woman and all. It felt nice to return to some sense of normalcy. 

“We’re gonna get into first.” Other-Gwen put her shoulders back and heels together. “After all, what’s the first step of ballet?”

Gwen mirrored her pose. “Getting a good physical therapist.”

“Hardy har. What’s the second step of ballet, then?”

“Having confident feet.”

“Right. ‘Cause if you don’t know where your feet are…”

“You’ll never make it as a dancer.”

Other-Gwen broke from her refined pose. “…that’s the way your teacher phrased it?”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“That’s sad. Anyway, it’s your foundation. You need’em, otherwise, you’re not going anywhere. It’s the same with apologizing,” she said, putting her feet in second position and fixing her posture. “Let’s establish the facts, let’s plant our feet. What are the facts behind this?”

Gwen moved to second position. “I hurt Miles.”

“Try a different fact. Try third. What happened?”

To third. “I was accepted into the Spider Society, and got a watch with the ability to transport to multiple universes, including his. But when I got the watch, I was told not to visit, as he was a threat to the multiverse. So I didn’t — for months.”

“Move to fourth.”

To fourth. “When I finally got a mission to Earth-1610, his universe, I broke protocol and visited him. But I didn’t tell him I was on a mission, or that he was deemed an anomaly, or,” to fifth, “that someone close to him was supposed to die, and he was supposed to let it happen.”

“He was supposed—” Other-Gwen’s eyes widened. “You didn’t even tell us that happened. That’s fucked. Sorry, screwed up.”

“You don’t have to— yeah.” Gwen pliéd from fifth. ”I can’t believe I didn’t tell him. Every single person in the Spider Society, including me, believed that death had to happen for the multiverse to stay together, and he was the only person who fought against it.”

“Can confirm that that’s seriously fucked up,” said Other-Miles, not looking up from his sketchbook. “Oh, by the way, I just got this out, I hope you don’t mind. Yeah, totally fucked. I’d do the same if it were me.”

Other-Gwen moved back to first. “Did you try and stop him?”

She sighed. “Yes. Because I thought that if I didn’t, the multiverse would fall apart. Which it wouldn’t, I see how little sense it makes now.”

“Sounds like you’re ready to set it up for the pirouette,” Other-Gwen said with a small smile,  bringing a foot forward. “Remember, the guilt may be eating you up from the inside, but you hurt him. Not that your feelings don’t matter, they absolutely do. It’s just that his feelings are the ones being prioritized right now.”

“So, something like…” Gwen brings her foot forward to match. “I wanted to protect you, but, in doing so, I made you feel unwanted. No, not unwanted. I made you feel betrayed, alone, and not good enough.”

“Okay, now you follow through.”

She sets up for the pirouette. “I didn’t mean to make you feel this way—”

“Try it again. Put his feelings first.”

Gwen got ready for another pirouette. But she couldn’t continue. “…I don’t really know what to say.”

“Just follow through with what you said before. Do another spin.”

“Uh… I made you feel terrible about yourself, and that wasn’t okay.” She touched down from the pirouette and began doing all kinds of jumps and footwork, letting her muscle memory lead the way. “You don’t deserve that. You deserved to know the truth about everything from the start. You deserved a civil conversation on an equal playing field about what was going to happen. You deserved to have a say.”

Other-Gwen backed away, leaving the living room floor to her variant. Gwen fell into the routine from one of her old shows — step, touch, kick, touch. “I’m sorry, Miles, for everything. For not telling you what I should’ve.” Step, step, jump. “For not considering your point of view.” Step, jump. “For not believing you.” Step, touch, step. “For betraying your trust when you needed it most.”

…

Other-Miles and Other-Gwen looked on. “Well,” Other-Gwen said after a moment, “where’s the rest of the routine?”

“Oh, uh,” Gwen said, falling from her practiced pose, “after this is the leap. Where I jump to my dance partner and they catch me. Oh my God, wait. Wait, wait.”

“What?”

“That’s such a neat coincidence. A leap at the end. A leap of faith.”

Other-Miles gasped. “That’s such good symbolism! The leap of faith! ‘Cause this whole thing is a— whoa.”

“You do leap at the end of this, don’t you? Well, just remember. The dance partner, in this case, is you.” Other-Gwen put a supportive hand on her shoulder. “You’ve got to remember to catch yourself on the way down. You’re not a monster. You’ve made a mistake, but you’re not a terrible person. That is evident by how you’re working on yourself and making a promise to change your behaviour later.”

“Wow,” Gwen said. “Where’d you learn all this?”

“Therapy.”

“Oh.”

“Also,” said Other-Miles, “give him some time to figure it all out. Don’t expect an answer right away.”

“You can afford therapy for the both of you? In NYC?”

“Eh, we kinda flicker in and out when we can.” He put down his sketchbook. “It’s more like I like having time to work my thoughts out, and… y’know, I’m Miles, he’s Miles.” He splayed his fingers and mashed them together to emphasize his point of being one and the same. 

“That is helpful. Thank you.” She took a deep breath in. “Thank you both, honestly, so much. I feel a lot better now and am filled with a lot less dread.”

“Hooray for less dread!” Said Other-Miles from the couch. He was back to being nose-deep in his sketchbook, felt-tip-pen behind the ear and everything. 

Gwen smiled. Some things never change.

“Well, little Gwen,” Big Gwen said, ruffling her hair, “You got any more personal problems you need help working out, or do you just want to sit and finish your tea?”

She plunked herself back on the couch. “I don’t know, do you guys have any more… helpful pieces of advice? I guess?”

“Hm…” Other-Gwen picked up her tea and took a sip. “Here: It’s Mr. Morales and Mrs. Morales. Until at least a year of dating."

“Yeah, Gwennie found out the hard way that you don’t casually call my parents by their first names. They’re kinda sticklers for that.” He took his brush pen out from behind his ear and put the cap on it. “You haven’t met them yet, right?”

She pursed her lips. “No, I haaaaaaaave.”

“And did you—“ he said. Gwen nodded. “Oh. Oh no.”

Other-Gwen was quick to stop that negative thought spiral. “Hey, don’t worry, don’t worry. There’s still plenty of time for a better impression, so just apologize the next time you see them and it should all turn out okay.” 

“I have another question, kind about that, but it may be a bit weird.”

“Ask away.”

"Are they — the Moraleses — both… alive in your universe? Like, why do you guys have their place?”

“God, little Gwen, how has your universe been treating you? Yes, they’re both alive. My dad was caught in some rubble one time, but he’s fine now. He just needs a wheelchair to get around, so the elevator breaking down every now and again wasn’t just an inconvenience anymore.”

“But by the time that happened, we’d been talking about moving in together anyway, so they just moved downstairs.” Her smile softened. “You can go say hi to them if you want, they know about the Spider stuff.”

“And is my dad— our dad— forget it. Is Captain Stacy alive?”

“Captain Stacy? Pffft.” Other-Gwen rolled her eyes. “He’s a math teacher.”

Gwen’s head was spinning now. Not only was there a universe where her and Miles were living together, happily married, but Captains Morales and Stacy were alive. 

Miguel’s theory was bullshit. 

Miguel’s theory was bullshit!

“What theory? What’s wrong?” Said Other-Miles, grabbing her forearm.

Shit. She hadn’t meant to say that out loud. Her mind had been suitably blown tonight, but she didn’t want this Miles to know his father was supposed to die, or tell this Gwen their relationship working out perfectly was a statistical miracle. 

But they both were looking at her expectantly, with all the openness in the world. Maybe these two didn’t need to beat up their villains. Maybe they just talked them out of it. 

But before Gwen could explain everything, her watch dinged, with a message. 

From Margo.

“She’s found him! Earth-42!” She jumps from the couch and begins fiddling with Hobie’s watch.

“They found him?”

BWOOSH! A collage-like portal appears in front of her. “Yep!” 

Other-Miles and Other-Gwen ignore all the swirling junk and newsprint that used to be their living room. They just stand and look at her.

“What?”

Other-Gwen smiles sheepishly. “Can we get one last thing before you go?”

“I guess, uh-OOF!” They pull her in for one more hug.

“Sorry, couldn’t letcha leave without one,” she says. 

He gives her a kiss on the forehead, and they both let go. “Good luck out there, little Gwen.” 

Gwen smiles. “Thank you for the tea. And everything else.”

Other-Gwen gives her a two-fingered salute. “No problem, Spider-Woman.”

“Now, go kick some ass!”

“Miles.”

“And give a meaningful apology. But don’t forget to kick ass on the way,” he said with a wink.

Gwen snorts. “Of course.”

She gives her multiverses selves a wave. God, this day has been wild. She leaps into the portal headfirst. She leaps like she’s onstage in a ballet, performing a routine she’d rehearsed thousands of times. She leaps with the knowledge that her dance partner will be right there to catch her. 

In every other universe, Gwen Stacy falls for Spider-Man.

And, in every other universe, it is beautiful. 

———————--

Both of them wait until the portal’s been closed for a few moments before saying anything. 

The living room is a mess. The door to Miles’ old room is open. There’s an extra mug on the ottoman. 

Other than that, there’s no record that all that was all real.

“What the fuck,” is all she can say. 

Miles flops on the couch. “Oh my God, Gwen.” 

“What the… even for Spider-people standards, that was— whew! That was so weird!”

“Gwen—” 

“There’s another you, and another me, and we’re teenagers, and angsty as hell, and there’s a whole bunch of other Spiderpeople, some fuck named Miguel who’s screwing it all up, a- and the multiverse is collapsing?” She sighed. “Also, the multiverse is real, that’s new.”

“…Gwennie?” 

Miles was looking up at her with those puppy-dog eyes — the same look when he first told her he wanted to marry her, and when he did marry her — a look with so much love it almost made her sick. 

It didn’t take much these days.

“What’s wrong, honeybun?” She sat down next to him, and their arms gravitated around each other. Just like flips and death-defying maneuvers, having each other close was an instinctual reflex.

He let the silence hang as his eyes grew glossy. He grabbed his sketchbook and passed it to her.

Inside was a pen-and-marker sketch of her and Little Gwen. They were in matching poses, mid-pirouette-prep. He’d perfectly captured the warm moment — not that she didn’t think he could. Her thoughts about his art were what she always thought.

“Amazing, just amazing.” She turned her head up to him. “What’re gonna call it?”

He leaned back to look at her. “What about The Moment I Fell in Love With My Wife All Over Again, ink on paper.”

“You say that every time!” She said, giggling.

“And I mean it every time! I’m serious, I…” he waited for her to calm down, then quickly realized it was to no avail. “I was watching you two from the couch, and you just looked like a natural up there. Helping her with stuff, talking her through it, speaking her language…”

He rested a hand on her stomach. “And I guess it just hit me, like… that’s gonna be you and me… forever… in like, what, half a year?”

“Yeah, it is.” She kissed him on the nose. “And don’t discredit the job you did out there.”

He chuckled. “I mean, if a Miles had come through the portal I could have been a little more helpful…” He closed his sketchbook. “But it was a Gwen. And she needed a Gwen.”

The sun had long since set over the Brooklyn skyline. It was there, out the window, where the portal once stood. The day had been fairly normal until Little Gwen had showed up, but it ended like so many days did — with her head on his shoulder and his arm around her waist. 

“God,” said Miles, in that low whisper that spelt safety, “I think I could make a million paintings about how I feel about everything and you right now, and it wouldn’t nearly be enough.”

She squirmed to one side to get a good look at him. “Wow, Miles Morales." She poked him on the nose. “Do you have a crush on me?”

“... Khivol?” 

The voice broke through the welling anxiety that had stopped Khivol in his tracks. He had been reading at the park, avoiding his sister’s investigation of his book shop, when the incoming storm pushed him from reading in the solitude of the park, just a short walk away from both his shop and his apartment. Still unable to return to his shop, Khivol had entertained the idea of going to one of the bars he used to frequent, however as he grew closer to  it’s doors, Khivol found himself unable to go any further, still a good few meters from the bar when the anxiety of running into people he used to know, and more so them calling his sister, started to cause him to panic. And that was when the voice broke through the cyclone of fear that had frozen him in his tracks. 

Khivol recognized the bitter-caramel of the man’s voice, it belonged to one of the many people he had tried to leave behind along with his old life, however unlike the rest of them, Khivol was actually relieved that he was there, standing behind him. As he turned to face him, Khivol watched the man’s expression change from uncertainty to relief.

“ Raf… It’s… been a while..” 

here’s a list contrasting almost everything Daxter does that could be seen as brave or cowardly.

Jak and Daxter: 

Daxter is hesitant to deal with Lurker sharks, go into the spidercaves, go into a boss fight with Jak, prefering to stay with Keira. ride an untested zoomer across a fire canyon.

BUT

Does all of these things anyway.

Jak 2: 

Daxter runs from men in armor with guns, Hesitates to speak up against people who have guns/knives and are highkey/lowkey threatening him. wants to take the easy way out and just go home instead of fighting the big boss. Fears metalheads Would rather ride on a balloon in safety than face metalheads

BUT

Rescues Jak from a prison full of these people Isn't scared of Jak who nearly attacked him fights the big boss anyway. Fights metalheads anyway Hangs off the side of a turret that's being shot at. Fires a gun bigger than himself. Stands up for himself and Jak against people who have threatened them. Defuses a bomb, one that is a copy of one he has seen go off for really no reason.

Jak 3:

Hesitates to use some flying contraption to go to a volcano Would prefer to stay with Sig fighting metalheads than go into the final area. Hesitates to fight people.

But

-Does so anyway -pilots a missile, -goes into the catacombs to chase a guy who hurt jak -Stands up to what amounts to the gods of his planet

Jak X:

wishes to go home. tries to low-key discourage Jak from antagonizing people. Faints after hearing he's been poisoned.

tells Jak not to invite him on anymore adventures

But

-Is receiving death-threats, goes out to drink despite those death threats and gets attacked -Tries to fight a robot that is holding him by his skull -can take part in combat racing, -Rides on the back of a vehicle that is being shot at, bLOWN UP AND SMASHED, HANGS ON TO THE BACK OF IT DESPITE ALL THAT. CRAWLS UNDER IT AND POPS UP THROUGH THE GAPS IN THE CAR IF IT GOES VERTICAL

WHAT IS YOUR DEAL?! HOLY SHIT. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! WHAT THE FUCK. WHY? WHY DO YOU THINK THIS IS A GOOD IDEA? YOU ARE BEING SWUNG AROUND LIKE A BASEBALL BAT IN A BATTING CAGE. OH MY GOD.YOU'RE WORSE THAN JAK. WHEN JAK DOES DANGEROUS SHIT IT AT LEAST SERVES A PURPOSE. AT LEAST BE ON THE FRONT OF THE VEHICLE. THE TAIL FIN YOU WERE HANGING ONTO IS GONE. IT GOT BLOWN UP. WHY ARE YOU STILL ON THE BACK OF THE CAR?! NO! YOU'RE AN ADRENALINE JUNKIE AND AN ALCOHOLIC. STOP IT! STOP IT, YOU HUGE, FUCKING, DISASTER. GOD! FUCK!

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BRAVERY AND STUPIDITY.

WHAT THE HELL.

GOD.

-flirts with the guy trying to kill them.

All Jak Adventures:

-hangs off of Jak's shoulder as he does ridiculous jumps -is small and fuzzy and people comment on his suitability to be lunch/a fur coat.

I was tagged by these awesome people : damnimmortal and thecreaturesedits

Name: Janelle

Nickname: Janelley, Nelly Nel Jan (idk why)

Birthday: 17th June

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Straight

Height: 155-160cm (around 5’1??)

Time Zone: AEST (Australian Eastern Standard Time)

What time and date is it there: 5:20pm, 17/9/14

Average hours of sleep?: 6-8hrs i guess?

OTPS: Jeamus, Immortalanex, Immortalfox, SlyPKC (maybe more…)

The last thing I Googled: lol ‘australian timezones’ because I’m dumb c:

First word that comes to mind: food

What I last said to a family member: “HEEEYYYYY, HEEYYY DUDE???” 

One place that makes me happy and why: My bed

How many blankets I sleep with: Normally one I guess

Favorite beverage: Almost any flavoured iced tea and aloe vera juice c:

Last movie I saw: Whispers of the Heart - Studio Ghibli

Three things I can’t live without: Food + Internet

A piece of advice for my followers: You ARE AMAZING in your own little ways that no one else is. Oh and when you feel real positive and happy don’t let anyone say otherwise and don’t believe them.

You HAVE to listen to this song: This isn’t The End - Owl City

My blogs: Only this blog lol

I tag: omelette-douche-fromage, creature-kid, eemortulhdizzle, princesskootra, pornagonnova, uberimmortalpkc, whatthesenpai, viva-la-creatures, pinknovapolitan, potatoknob

SO I'M JUST CHILIN IN THIS TINY CHAT RIGHT

AND THEN OUT OF NO WHERE MY MOMMY COMES IN AND THERE SJUST THIS AWKWARD 5 SECOND STARE BETWEEN US

AND SHE WAS LIKE

"whats with the get up??"

and i'm just like

"i'm in cosplay hahha"

and she was like 

"you look cute.. armin"

and i'm just liike 

"im eRWIN TONIGHT"