#long update

for those that missed it, tmitawh is now a novel and will no longer be told in an interactive fiction format. this has upset a lot of people. i've lost a lot of followers over this announcement. and i can understand this to some extent, but largely i have to continue to be unapologetic about my choices.

this story is one that has, in every meaning of the phrase, saved my life. writing in this little world has gotten me through some of the darkest times and carried me through to the next day. at some point, IF stopped being a media that was capable of telling the story i wanted to tell.

i'm disheartened by a lot of the anons i've received. some are hateful and unkind. others are upset that they no longer will have the opportunity to pursue Cain or Ezio, and a few mention that they're not interested in reading a lesbian story and will not be reading the book if it ever makes it to publication. i've disregarded the first, but the second cuts the deepest i think.

i have never, ever been shy on this app that i'm a lesbian. i feel as though i've talked endlessly about it. being a lesbian is a huge facet of my identity and being told that, in so many words, a story written for myself, with other queer people in mind, is not for them seems like such a stupid thing to say. like, i didnt write it for you. i wrote it for me. i wrote it for the lesbians who love so violently that they have to hide it away under their clothes, in between their teeth. i wrote it for the lesbians who have been told their love is disgusting, or wrong, or sexy and for a male's pleasure only. i wrote it for the lesbians who are told their love is okay as long as they never show it- as long as they only hold hands at most but never kiss in public. i wrote it for the lesbian who sits in pews and breathes over their hands and wonders if God loves them still.

i'm not sorry to not have written a story catered for you when the whole world is for you. leave me out of your self-absorbed, hateful little orbit.

please know, this blog does not tolerate hatred, bigotry, or harassment in any shape or form. and if you're going to fuck around with me, you sure as hell are going to find out with me.

on a more positive note!

i want to thank you all who have been overwhelmingly positive and supportive of my endeavors!! it means the absolute world to me!! i sometimes hold myself at night and think of all the kind words y'all have sent over these past two years and just sob. never in my life before this could i have imagined sharing my work with people who give a shit and care. it warms me in ways i cannot begin to describe. i love you and i hope you are well as always. my inbox/dms are open ANYTIME if you just want to chat, catch up, rant to me, or tell me about your pet. actually, please tell me about your pet.

Some quick publishing updates:

I'm 20k words out of 90k into draft 2. and i think this is going to be the last draft before i query (?????) i'm really very happy with the muscles and bones of the manuscript. now it's just some meticulous line editing i have to work through.

after this, i'm off to the query trenches. (im scared) if anybody has gone through this process before and has any tips, i'd love to hear them!

here's a little excerpt:

"She grabs hard enough to make sure of her presence, not enough to bruise. Some sick part of the Traveler’s brain says, Yes. Please. More. Press deeper. Press harder. Bruise me. Hurt me. She delights in the heat that blossoms from where the Reverie digs her fingers into skin. Eyes earnest, stubborn disposition to her jaw as the thick muscle there flickers in an implication of anger. “I will find you,” she’s shaping her tongue into a dagger at the Traveler’s throat. “I will find you again, and that is a promise.” The Traveler gasps, tilting her head higher. She blinks and— The Reverie’s mouth is on hers, hot and aching, and the Traveler blinks— Want flavors the Traveler’s tongue, the Reverie’s hands pressed tightly against her collarbone, teeth at her jaw. She blinks and— Is this Before or After?"

i also, stupidly, have officially started a twitter that i want to start working with. i know twitter is dead, but it remains to be very useful for publishing. if you'd like to follow me, im there on @ morganhollow25. i dont know how to use it. im scared to use it. but if you have a twitter maybe follow me there too! i absolutely plan to be on tumblr primarily. i love it here and have grown a tiny home in these webs.

Before the blade could make contact though - the silent and familiar 'twang' of a bowstring letting loose reverberated from the forest and before Ares could register what was happening an Arrow whizzed past them and collided with the blade with enough force to shatter the arrow and wrench the blade from the unsuspecting Guard's hand. It flew aside and splashed uselessly into the mud nearby.

"What the-?" Another Guard gasped as he reached to draw his own sword - but the moment the sword left the scabbard it was also struck by another arrow and flew harmlessly aside.

There was then a sudden flurry of motion as the rest of the guards scrambled for their weapon. Another arrow let loose from the darkness and soared straight through the hood of a third Guard before embedding itself in the tree behind him - pinning the Guard to the same tree in the process.

The Guard that was still clenching onto Ares and Olli then let out a shout as something struck him from behind, causing the man to crumble like a sack of potatoes. Both boys were pulled to the ground by the impact but then managed to roll away as the man released his grip.

Ares was quickly back on his feet and leapt backwards away from the man before he could regain himself, but as Ares settled into a crouch nearby he realized that was unnecessary as a large Theivul stood on the man's chest. The Dark Type Pokemon had its head bowed and was snarling down close to the man's face. From where Ares crouched he could see the fear and disbelief plastered across the man's expression.

"Theivul!" Olli cheered out. Without thinking, he got up and started running towards the Pokemon, but Theivul was quick to knock the man out with a Sucker Punch, and jump down to stand next to Olli before Olli could reach them. Olli enthusiastically pet the soft fur on either side of the Pokemon's face.

"Man, are we glad to see you!" Ares laughed as he walked up towards Theivul as well. "Wait... but if yer here..." Oli started...

Both boys turned around and looked around them only to notice that the Guards were regrouping and surrounding them. Theivul arched down and let out a low warning growl - but before anyone could do anything two more arrows whizzed out of the darkness and struck the two Guards behind the boys. The men's shouts barely drowned out the sound of a whistle, and as if he was responding to the whistle, Thievul released a Night Slash out at the remaining Guards that blocked that escape route, and all three of them broke for the trees.

Ares felt his heart pound heavily in his chest as he saw a familiar form in the darkness behind the guards and picked up the pace. His vision disappeared in a flurry of forest green fabric as Jack pushed the two boys behind him as the Guard's regrouped.

"Jack!" Olli cried.

Jack didn't respond - his gaze was locked on the Guards. He cast his bow aside and drew his sword as he put himself directly between the enemy and the kids.

"Go." Jack growled, "But-" Olli started to argue, "Just go! Run! We'll talk about this later." Jack retorted.

Olli flinched, and for a second... he hesitated... but then he looked up at the oncoming Guards with their fancy armor and their drawn weapons and panic overtook the boy. With tears in his eyes he turned and bolted for the trees.

Ares however, hesitated longer, "What about you-" "I won't tell you again, Ares." There was a dead seriousness in Jack's tone that hit Ares at his core.

He took a step back... but suddenly a terrible feeling washed over him. It felt sort of like deja vue, and everything seemed to slow down. Suddenly he felt like this would be the last time he would ever see Jack again... and that thought terrified him.

Defiantly, he reached of Jack's discarded bow, "I'm going to fight too!"

Before Jack could argue though, they heard Olli shout from behind them. Jack whirled around with a look of panic, but then Ares saw what little colour that remained on Jack's face disappear. He whirled around as well just in time to see a flurry of Rapidash erupt through the trees. With the sky just starting to lighten behind them they almost looked mystical as they appeared through the mist.

The Rapidash surrounded both the Rovers and the Guards in a wide circle. Olli scampered to his feet and ran back to Jack and wrapped his arms around the older Rover with a look of pure terror. Jack put one hand on Olli's shoulder, and dropped his sword to put his other hand on Ares as they were completely surrounded.

Then, just as the sun began to peak over the horizon in the distance a figure appeared before them. She was small, only a child compared to the Soldiers around her - but she sat tall and straight on her steed. She wore a white, downy cloak that filtered the rising sun around her to the point that she almost looked like she was 'glowing', and for a second Ares thought that maybe he was looking at an Angel or something. All he could do was stand there in utter shock and stare as the Guards who had just been attacking them stopped and dropped down onto one knee before her, and he was surprised when even Jack bowed his head to her.