#lokiera

1/?

You can also ask Questions of any character in my story about anything. I'll role play as well. This blog is meant for you to get a real in depth experience with the story! So don't be afraid! And you can ask Blayne questions too!

I slowly etch another tally mark onto the bark of the tree. If all is right and I am able to do math correctly, I have been stuck here with him for nearly five years now. I had spent almost all of the second year contemplating the decision I made so long ago. Was it really wise to join Loki in his punishment? I had so much to live for and by the time I returned home my family and my team would be dead. Where was my reward in this? What if Loki was unable to be changed? Those thoughts had drifted in my mind for so long now, there was little else to do in the silence but think. Loki was still upset after five years. He still showed looks of disproval when I glanced at him looking at me. But I would just look at him with love and compassion. This was not only because I felt both feeling for him, but he needed to be reminded in his punishment that he was loved by someone. Somedays I made moves to show him love physically but the moment I would touch him he shied away like he was some animal afraid of people. He kept to himself, but I can feel his presence near when I sleep. He wraps his arm around me or draws his leather jacket over me. He thinks I can’t see his acts of kindness, his tenderness, his humanity. But that’s all I see now. I know that side exists even if he refuses to let it shine more. I just hope that the 95 years I have left of this punishment are enough to allow change. But when he storms off and away from me, because of his thoughts I’m sure, and I know I’m alone, I let all my doubts flood me. He doesn’t need to see that I doubt him, that I don’t believe he is capable of change, that I feel helpless and hopeless. I can only think of how dumb this was and how I didn’t think it through more. Oh this is the true silence here. When I know he’s left me in this forest and the noiseless environment shrouds me and holds me closer, than I have my thoughts to distract me. And they drift, and I cry. And I cry until it hurts. Until I have a headache, until I can’t possible produce anymore tears. And I let my hair, which has become a frizzy mess, fall where it may. I have lost the will to care about my appearance. Loki’s hair has gotten longer as well and I can see his cheekbones more, but we live. We still move about even in our disgruntled bodies. I just wish to go home and see my mom. And then for the second time today I begin crying more….
 -KM

The silence has etched its way into my sanity. There isn’t even the ringing if my ears to comfort me. There are ways to tell time but I let her do that. She makes tally marks on the bark of a tree. And I watch her slowly die each time she makes a mark on the grey bark. I can not tell colors from the greys but I can safely assume that my dearest has lost her shine. Her hair grows thinner and her cheeks have become more prominent on her face. I have not seen a thing that would produce reflections and furthermore have not seen what my punishment has done to me. But I could not care about myself now. I only care about her. This was my punishment, the one she hand picked for me and yet she choose to bear it with me and I ran out of chances to question why she did this. All I can think is this is my fault that she’s dying. If it had not been for the apples, the mortal would have perished long ago. But with said magical fruit she can go on suffering with me for many more years. Though when she looks at me, her eyes are free of suffering. She looks at me not even with regret. No she looks at me with love. That’s what drives me insane even more! This… She still…. How can this woman be so strong? She just looks at me like I’ve done no wrong, but I know I have! Every time she looks at me like that, all I can think of are all the reasons she shouldn’t! It angers me to my core most times. But then in those rare moments when she thinks she is alone, when she thinks I can not see her, she cries. She cries as long as she can until she can not. Until her breathing becomes a chore. Her body shakes so bad. I would presume this to be sobbing, but sobbing involves noise, and here in this desolate, grey, and noiseless prison, the Realm of Silence, there is only crying. No sobbing. And when I see her cry, I cry too. But she never sees that. She probably thinks me a monster, but let her. I am. That is all I have concluded from this all. I am a deranged monster, hell-bent to create chaos in my wake. And I’m left to think of this over and over again in the silence. 
-L

As the final battle between The Avengers and Loki continue Kiera is confronted with many choices and odd are she'll have to die before anyone can walk away from this alive.