#lls2022

“Well, you’ve never met anyone worth a damn then.”

Jim wants to make something for Oluwande's birthday, and they need everyone's favorite artist to help them.

“Look, you’re very cool, and you wear leather, okay, so maybe you won’t understand this. But everyone is worried all of the time whether they’re interesting or adventurous enough for you. And that bizarre, little man over there likes you very much. And you like him. And, if you can’t get over yourself long enough to realize that, you’re going to end up another leather-clad, middle-aged sad-sack dying alone in a puddle of his own piss. You can stab me in the face now.”

And, uh, death, you know, I’m used to death. But, um, but not to your death.

“Actually, I think I’m just so-so, but I’ve decided to carry myself like I’m cute.”

Look, whatever you’re going through right now is none of my business. But I understand what it’s like to live in disguise, okay? Let’s just say not all beards are actual beards, if you get my drift.