The Frost Fair  // January 18, 1811
Somehow overnight, the Thames has erected a City on Ice. The Frost Fair is a bacchanal with the primary objective to have as much fun (boozy and not) as possible without breaking the ice. Within hours of dawn, the Thames is transformed into a frozen pleasure gardens and thousands pay the entry fee for a slice of the hedonism. Colourful streamer, banners, and flags adorn makeshift tents, stalls made of old oars and wood, and even stalls made from old blankets.Â
Carriages carry families down the icy river to park steps away from the bustling crowds. From these coaches, ladies and gents jump down in their ice skates, prepared to explore fair by blade. Women walk around with baskets of hot apples covered by a cloth to warm their hands and heads. Donned in warm cloaks and leather boots, you cross the wooden ramp built connecting street to river. You step gingerly onto the ice. It is a wonder that an entire festival take place safely on ice, but the ice is matted down for walking. With the thought of slipping and falling swept from your mind, you turn your eyes to take in the numerous vendors and tents before you.Â
What will you do at the Frost Fair?
Her reputation precedes her: Kezia Bidari, the famed fortune teller. They say, what she sees in the cards will always come true. Far and wide, common folk, nobles, and even royalty have flocked to her store in London, La Fortuna Sanctorium, in the hopes that she may provide certainty in their futures. Endorsed by the King and Queen many years ago, there is not a more renowned and successful cartomancer, nor female entrepeneur in the Ton. You hear whispers that she is offering readings at the Frost Fair.
Only those with burning questions, haunting unknowns, and desperate hopes will find themselves taking a seat before her, baring their souls and futures to the mysterious woman before them.
What future awaits you in the cards?
(Look forward to a secondary post for instructions on how to get your muse’s fortune read and how to interact with Miss Kezia Bidari!)
Celebratory Printing Press
Trust the media of London to take any sensational event and capture it in ink and paper. The rare occurrence of a frozen Thames is no exception, and numerous printers have moved their set ups to the river to capitalize on the enthusiasm and excitement. Each is offering their own pressings, from souvenir cards to memorabilia broadsheets. Some can make personalized printings with the purchaser's name, and one enterprising press has even produced a pamphlet with a history of the Frost Fairs!
Food Stalls and Gingerbread Carts
The highlight of the Fair is the roast ox. Cooked for over 24 hours on a fire, fairgoers line up for their share of the succulent and tender delicacy. Families of butchers that span generations compete with one another to serve the best roast mutton, mince pies, jugged hare, black pudding, and sausages. Spiced apples can be found at every corner, along with mugs of mulled cider. To appeal to the sweet-tooths, plum cakes, brandy balls, spiced buns, and pancakes abound. For the chance to eat like the common folk, fishermen have lines and lines of oysters to be eaten raw, smoked, or roasted in front of you. Most notably, strolling vendors sell squares of fresh gingerbread, spread with hot dripping treacle.Â
Drink Stalls and Fuddling Tents
Tea, coffee and hot chocolate of all sorts and flavours imaginable are sold at tents and carts alike. But it is alcohol at the Frost Fair that reigns supreme. Gingerbread vendors, along with baked goods, sell cup after cup of gin. Youngsters head straight for the fuddling tents that sells Old Tom, a deceptively ardent and potent gin despite its light and sweet taste.Â
The fuddling tents, temporary pubs crafted from sails, oars, and barrels, are erected throughout the fairgrounds, and are undoubtedly the most boisterous and raucous spots. Perhaps you would like a mug of Purl; a combination of gin, spices and wormwood wine served piping hot, or perhaps a spiky Brunswick Mum for those who prefer spiced winter ale, or just the finest brandy. The most popular fuddling tent, the City of Moscow tent, attracts all with its Russian fiddlers and rowdy ambience.
Tradesmen from all over the world and of all types set up booths to sell their wares. Pedlars circulate through the crowd. Everything from books to toys to sheet music, all of which bear the label, “bought on the Thames”, can be found in every direction. Cups and cutlery with the Thames printed on it are particularly popular. For upscale shopping, one row of vendors sell rare jewelry, toys and upscale trinkets.
Ring toss, spin the wheel, darts, shooting; all sorts of amusing games have been set up. Whether any of them are fair is a debate for another time. Yet isn’t there something thrilling about spending a shilling for the hope of a prize, even if the more logical minded know the odds (and those boxes) are stacked against you?
Portable puppet shows pop up throughout the fairgrounds. Many of the shows cater to adults, showing parodies and satires of mature and comedic topics, including politics to current events. Punch and Judy puppet shows are all the rage and never fail to provoke shocked laughter from its slapstick humour.
Elephant Demonstration on the Ice
In the distance, shouts of excitement riddle the area. An elephant, majestic in a draped banner, is led across the ice by Blackfriars Bridge into a showing area. Once there, those brave enough may approach the enormous creature (for a fee) and even feed it fruits and bark.Â
Ice Skating and Sleigh Rides on the Ice
The obvious winter entertainments are not excluded from the festivities. Metal blades are available for rent, to zip along the ice, though whether it is a more stable or secure method of travel than boots depends on the skater. Ice rinks have been constructed and blocked off for the sport. Sleighs pulled by horses, or perhaps a rowdy group of gentlemen, stand by for farther adventures up the river. All need to be wary of the watermen keeping an eye on the thickness of the ice.
Small stages are interspersed throughout the other attractions, actors braving the cold to give the performances of their life—or at least of the day, before they return to Drury Lane for the evening performances. Scenes, monologues, excerpts from the plays of the moment, put on for free to try and tempt viewers into purchasing full tickets.
Set up the pins, line up your shot, and try to remember that ice will affect your throw! Is it the attention of a pretty lady on the line, or pride and honor that has been wagered? Your aim may be truer if you haven’t been indulging in some Old Tom.
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