@lionfeltâ said : â Forbidden to remember, terrified to forget; it was a hard line to walk. â
( twilight prompts / accepting !! )
    đđđ  đđđđ  đđđđđ  đđđđđđđđđ  đđđđđđ  on  her  nerves,  but  not  half  so  much  as  his  very  existence  within  their  ranks.  Aroâs  keen  interest  and  joy  at  having  Edward  finally  agree  to  join  them  infuriated  Janeâhe  was  a  threat  to  her  position  as  the  coveted  favourite  and  she  would  not  abide  being  replaced;  especially  not  by  Edward,  of  all  people. Â
    â Must  you  be  so  depressing? â  she  simpered,  casting  a  sideways  glance  at  him  from  her  perch  by  the  window.  She  had  a  book  in  her  lap,  old  with  yellowing  pages  and  written  in  a  different  language,  one  she  hoped  he  couldnât  understand  if  he  perused  her  thoughts.  She  couldnât  relate  to  him  at  all.  She  had  never  felt  close  enough  to  anyone  that  their  death  would  affect  her  so  completely  the  way  Bellaâs  seemed  to  affect  Edward.
    Wellâthat  wasnât  entirely  true.  There  was  Alec,  and  the  very  notion  of  anything  happening  to  him  sent  waves  of  nausea  roiling  through  her.  Her  grip  on  the  book  tightened  considerably.  But  Alec  was  family;  her  twin,  her  other  half,  the  balm  to  her  temper.  The  death  of  a  mere  mate  could  not  hope  to  compare  to  that  of  losing  the  only  family  she  had  in  the  world,  not  that  she  had  ever  had  a  mateâbut  still,  she  was  certain  the  two  were  entirely  different  circumstances  and  the  point  was,  Edward  needed  to  either  embrace  the  pain  or  move  on  from  it.  This  balancing  act  would  only  drive  himâand  herâcrazy.
    Jane  closed  her  book,  uncurling  herself  so  that  she  could  get  a  proper  look  at  him.  When  she  finally  spoke,  it  was  not  out  of  pity,  but  frustration.  â  You  cannot  have  both  worlds,  Edward.  Either  take  that  pain  and  make  a  weapon  of  it  as  I  did.  Or  let  it  go.  â