Okay bear with me for a second but I can't help but think that Astrid being in labor with their first child must have single-handedly been the funniest and most terrifying thing to ever happen on Berk.Â
Like can you imagine? Hiccup is with her all day and night 24/7 doting on her as much as possible until it's time, at which point Valka, Gothie, Heather and Ruffnut declare the No Men Allowed rule and kick him out of the house. Hiccup is pacing around the door frantic and excited with Tuffnut Fishlegs and Snotlout all just nervously gabbing away and Hiccup's all "this is it, oh my Thor this is it, it's actually happening-"Â
And then from the other side of the door all of a sudden Astird just starts fucking SCREAMING CURSES AT THE TOP OF HER LUNGS "GET. OUT. YOU SON OF A HALF-TROLL, RAT-EATING, SLUDGE BUCKET. GET OUT OF ME." And on the outside of the house Hiccup and the lads just fucking shrink and fall over in COMPLETE TERROR because they have all heard Astird Hofferson yell but they have never heard Astrid Haddock yell and it's just a lot of screaming and cursing and TERROR for the longest time until it all finally goes quiet and eventually the boys are let back in to find all the girls smiling and tearing up and Astrid is holding her little baby daughter and smiling so softly and happily like she didn't just curse up a storm more wrathful than Thor's life-threatening thunderstorm of destruction.
