#lifepains

I know this may sound weird but I really do miss my friend. We would kick it , laugh, smoke , go out everything ... yeah there was sex but I still valued his FRIENDSHIP. We were friends before we got intimate ; I was open to him & working on opening up more. I trusted him & started to believe he only wanted the best for me. I really believed he really did care about my interest , my well being & my happiness . The connection we had was something different, something I really enjoyed . I looked forward to seeing him, chatting with him on FT about my day - the stress, the excitement everything- helping him through his demise. he was really my friend : all the laughs & he never made sex a factor & now he's gone . How ? We were open about everything & now we're nothing . I trusted him- something I don't do for ANYONE not even my parents (another story) & he just booted me. I know he's sensitive & quick to cut people off for his personal reasons; but why me ? I want answers I know I'll never get , I really just came on here to vent . Cause I'm really hurt.... I really do miss my friend . The vent P2

but, overcome this malady. 

Cos I ad a bitchin drink that was totally instagramabble.  First world problems amirite?

I'm more of a visual person but I feel like I sometimes can't communicate through imagery any better than I can with words. When someone says draw a picture of how you feel today, I think too much about how I feel instead of letting my emotions decide and then the result feels too contrived. This is a problem because I feel like I am more of an emotional person but I've been raised to be so logical that I can't let my true emotional self out. As an artist I shouldn't be so logical, there are no rules or answers in art, it's full of endless possibility. Why is communication such a difficult thing for humans? There's my mini rant on the difficulty of expressing myself.