#lfwc

Missing Monday 1/24/23 Update!

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The Din has updated~ Caisa and Lorentz enjoy the view at sea!

Feel free to reblog - it areally helps new readers find the comic! <3 <3

masterlist ; profiles ; tag written for the lfw challenge. fake title prompt #5

characters: jeonghan || side: seokmin, seungcheol, jihoon words: 2k genre: angst , one (1) instance of fluff warnings: unhealthy behavior, hints of depression...? prompt: “when you said it was over i didn’t think you meant it like this.” from the lfw challenge and this song.

maybe one day, the memories of you won’t wake up when he does

Jeonghan’s eyes open lazily, sleepiness making it hard to focus on anything. He shifts around bed trying to find the source of the sound that woke him up. He gets his answer as he glances at the open window and finds a small bird chirping and skipping around his windowsill. A groan escapes his mouth before he gets up. The bird flies away when jeonghan gets close enough to the window and closes it. Sunlight makes his eyes hurt when he looks outside, the busy street below makes him taste something akin to bitterness.

His phone reads 10:45am when he grabs it after laying in bed again. The red icon next to his messages makes his breath stop for a brief second, his heart skips a beat as he opens the app. Jeonghan has to resist the urge to throw his phone across the room when the name on his phone reads Seungcheol instead of your name. He sighs and places an arm over his eyes. His phone is back on top of his nightstand before he tugs at the blankets and makes himself comfortable again. The quietness of the room lulls him back to sleep. After all, it’s too early to be thinking about you.

This story was created for the Lost For Words Challenge.

Genre: Angst

Characters: Wen Junhui, Xu Minghao, Jeon Wonwoo

Warnings: Death, Depression..?

Word Count: 1850

Prompts Chosen: 

Quote Prompt: 4. “sometimes the loneliest place to be is in love.” - lang leav

Conversation Prompt: 

2. “have you ever thought about what would’ve happened if we didn’t kill him?” 

3. “if you hadn’t died, none of this would’ve happened in the first place!”

[There's a few issues with the formatting and font on mobile.]

Junhui stated blankly at the plain white wall just over his therapists left shoulder. "Is there anything more you want to say?" she asked.

Junhui shrugged, slightly shaking his head no.

"Well that concludes our session today," she smiled slightly and leaned forward. "I do hope you'll try better next time."

Junhui nodded and stood up to leave. I'm not sure there'll be a next time.

He climbed into his car and drove with no destination in mind. It was only after he'd reached the large black hats that he'd realised where he'd ended up once again.

Sighing he got out and pushed the gate wide open allowing himself to pass through. He walked along the rows upon rows of headstones protruding out the ground and made his way to the one on the third row.

He knelt down before a grave and stared at the stone bearing the name: Jeon Wonwoo 1996 - 2018

His heart clenched and he had to force the air out of his lungs and pull it back in. An old memory, like a vintage photo passed through his mind, but he quickly shoved it away, compressing the building ball of emotions building up at the pit of his stomach.

He sat there a bit longer humming a slow tune to himself before deciding to leave and head back home where Minghao was waiting for him.

...

"Hey, where were you?" Minghao asked, looking up at the sound of the door clicking open.

Junhui closed the door behind him, "I went to visit him again."

Minghao stiffened, "How was he?"

Junhui lifted a shoulder slightly, and dropped it. "Same as always I guess."

Minghao tried to give him the sweetest of smiles, his lips straining with the effort.

Junhui was completely oblivious to all this, and simply walked past him to his bedroom and shut the door behind him.

He lay on his bed and stared at the ceiling. There wasn't much he wanted to do these days. Not without Wonwoo anyway.

His heart didn't ache or anything when he thought of him. He didn't feel a pang of sadness in his chest. He didn't feel like breaking down into sobs until his body would tire. He just felt an empty void in his soul. A place that needed filing up.

He felt lost and alone.

He wished he could cry it out. Or maybe even break everything in the house in anger. He wished he'd at least feel something. But all his thoughts were a series of blanks, leaving him feeling vacant and bare.

With no memory of having fallen asleep, Junhui woke up and rubbed his eyes. He sat up in his bed, his muscles aching. The quick movement sent a slight throbbing in his head. Groggily he stood up and walked out his room to get a glass of water.

He found Minghao sitting at the dining table reading a book with a cup of coffee sitting not too far away.

Minghao glanced up as Junhui walked in. He didn't comment on his crumpled clothes that would suggest he'd been sleeping. He silently turned back to his book and continued to read.

After having his glass of water he sat down at the table on the opposite end to the other boy. He stared down and silently watched rippling movement of the liquid.

A few moments later Minghao look up at the boy sitting across him and examined him over his glasses curiously. He simply sat there, stiller then a statue, intently staring at his glass of water. He thought about saying something, but then thought against it, and went back to his book.

He'd always just thought he should give him space. Give him time. To figure out things on his own. And if he needed him of course he'd always be here to lend an ear or help him out.

But it had been months and there had been no change in Wen Junhui. The therapist had said they hadn't made much progress at all, if any. And though Minghao was worried out of his mind, he'd still thought all Junhui had needed was space.

He sighed. Maybe just a little more space.

Junhui stood up, leaving his glass of water untouched and left to go back to his room. He figured it was quite late and he should probably go to bed properly this time. He grabbed a towel and a few clothes and headed to the bathroom.

...

He sat in the familiar beige sofa chair facing a woman. It took him a few moments to get his bearings and he squinted his eyes trying to focus he rubbed them and squinted again.

"Let's start again, what do you last remember?" his therapist asked watching him intently, not missing a single detail about him.

When had he come here? He had no memory of driving to this dreaded place he'd sworn he'd never return to.

He shut his eyes tight trying to think. He searched in his brain left and right but all he was met with was pitch black emptiness.

What was he doing? How did he get here?

What happened?

"Well there's more progress than I've seen in weeks, you're finally talking," she beamed at him.

He didn't realise he'd asked the last one aloud.

"W-what happened?" he repeated.

"What do you last remember doing?" she asked.

"I don't know," he pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "I... Don't remember anything," he whispered suddenly very scared. "What did you do to me?"

"Think back to the last thing you did," she stated calmly.

"I... I was going to the shower. I was getting ready for bed."

"And then..?"

"I don't remember," he sighed. He hit his head with his knuckles again and again, over and over, "I don't remember. I don't remember. I don't remember."

The therapists hands flew forward grabbing his wrists away from his face. "Junhui stop," she said sternly. She loosened her grip slightly when she felt his arms go slack. He was staring at the ground and his face was blank once again. Back to how he usually was.

"You passed out in the shower and your friend, he called the ambulance up for you," she said lightly. "You haven't been eating anything lately and it took a toll on your body. Do you remember anything now?"

Junhui continued to stare hard at the ground, images flashed in his mind when he closed his eyes. He blinked a few times.

He was sitting up against the wall on the bathroom floor, Minghao's face directly in front of his, his eyes filled with worry and concern._

He lay on a stretcher and was being put into ambulance, Minghao running in after him.

There was an IV tube protruding out his right arm and Minghao sat in a chair at the foot of his bed head in his hands.

And all of a sudden the images changed. They warped into each other and twisted out of form.

A man swung a knife at him and he ducked out the way, only to be hit across the head with a bat.

A slash of the knife was heard and he saw a body fall. His whole world shattering, he threw a hot iron at the one at fault.

His legs gave way as he sat between them, head in his hands, and watched as a man lay on the ground, cold and eyes empty of life. His skin slowly turning blue.

He felt the images dissolve out of shape and memories they brought shredding his insides out.

And then...

Wonwoo was holding his hand smiling at him, causing his own lips to stretch out into a smile.

Wonwoo brushed his fringe out of his eyes and handed him an ice lolly and they both made a toast with their lollies before breaking out into a fit of giggles.

Wonwoo tapped his nose and the continued to watch the sunset that couldn't be more beautiful.

Wen Junhui lay on the floor, at the foot of his chair. A single tear fell out of his eye and crawled down the side of his face, dropping onto the carpet beneath him.

He blinked again as one last image flashed behind his closed eye lids.

"Sometimes the loneliest place to be is in love." It was a line from an old poem he'd read long ago. He hadn't understood it back then, and only now he was beginning to feel the full weight of its wisdom.

His therapist knelt next to him stroking his hair softly as sobs broke wracked though his whole form and he cried and cried never wanting to stop.

Hoping his reality was nothing more than a nightmare.

Praying he'd wake up soon.

...

Minghao looked around the house, but he couldn't find Junhui anywhere. He seen him come home earlier and was certain he hadn't left. And he'd checked his room and the bathrooms multiple times afraid the events of last time would once again repeat itself.

Stepping into Junhui's bedroom for the fourth time, he noticed the window wide open and quickly ran to glance out. He glances down and saw nothing but a clear pavement and sighed in relief. He looked around before noticing the bars leading up to the roof on the side of the wall, and used them as a ladder to get himself up there.

He slowly sat down slowly beside Junhui and stared out over all the rooftops at the cityscape before them.

They sat in silence for a few moments before Minghao spoke up, "Do you ever wonder what would've happened if we didn't kill him?"

Junhui didn't answer straight away. He didn't react to the question. He hadn't even moved a muscle and Minghao wondered maybe if he hadn't heard it at all.

But then he replied, his voice raspy and low,"All the time."

Minghao's eyes widened slightly. He hadn't expected such a straightforward answer or one not void of emotion. He sighed and scooted closer. He reached over to Junhui's hand resting on his thigh and placed his own over it, squeezing it lightly.

Junhui who had been staring at the stars, looked down at his hand and clenched his first and then unclenched. "I didn't deserve him..." he whispered.

"He didn't deserve you," Minghao corrected pointedly. "He abused you. You didn't like him."

"And whose fault was that? Mine. I'm the one that didn't deserve him. I'm the one that should've died. I'm the one that cheated on him." Junhui turned on him angrily, "With you!"

Minghao stared at him in shock. He didn't respond for a while and just stared at the ground. He again reached over and rubbed Junhui's arm soothingly, the atmosphere still too tense to say anything.

"But you're right," Minghao glanced up at those words. "I didn't like him," Junhui said staring at the ground.

"I loved him." He stared straight up at the stars again, at the twinkling constellations, with more emotion than the other boy had seen in months. The light from the stars reflected off his eyes as frustration swirled in together with the pain and Minghao wondered what else he was feeling.

Junhui sighed and looked up at the sky, "Why couldn't he be the one sitting next to me right now? Why did you come to my house that day; a fight was inevitable." Tears welled in Junhui's eyes and he quickly wiped them away.

City of Cards: CoCCO Prelude: 06: 06-10


Prelude 05 I Prelude 04 I Prelude 03 I Prelude 02 I  Prelude 01



Happy Birthday Xander, drink responsibly and enjoy your emotions.