#lettingitgo

#NotJusSayin⁠

Everything in my life has served a purpose... everything I do leads me to why I do certain things the way I do... and for that, I am grateful.  I tend to believe I’m a good person at heart, filled with nothing but good intentions just striving in life trying to be the best me I can be. What I can never understand, however, is why people don’t hold same values. What I can never understand, is why people intentionally hurt people or use people or screw people over. I Was raised to be good, and honest, and noble.  My parents worked hard to make sure I never took handouts for granted, taught me to always walk with my head held high, and to know that hard work gets you far, and boy is it worth it. Through my young adult life, I’ve noticed that this isn’t always true. And maybe I have it twisted... You see, hard work gets you no where sometimes, and I don’t even know if that’s how my parents taught me to believe, or if I just picked it up by example. What I’ve learned, hard and fast, is that sometimes you can work as hard as you want and you'll just stay stuck in the same place. You see, its super hard to stay honest and noble when you have people left and right screwing you over. Money, the root of all evil, seems to be the fights I have most.  Jobs, a close second, tirelessly punching a clock waiting for my one day that the place I work for will reward me with stability.  But til then, I sit, and wait. I watch the clock and lose money left and right, get pulled here and there, and lose out on jobs to people who have “seniority” over me. Like, work is no longer about who busts their ass and proves themselves, no companies now reward who’s stayed the longest even if they’ve done nothing to benefit the workplace. Time, I’ve also learned, is insignificant, but valuable in the most mundane sense. In this moment, it seems I can construct reasons as to why things are the way they are and may even seem okay with it, but the truth is, I’m enraged.  Going to the root of my frustration, you’ll find me a blood boiling mess, enraged at the fact that my once best friend who was my roommate for the past year, moved out and screwed me out of $52 that she owes me for utilities. Now, is $52 really going to ruin my life? No. But is it enough of an amount to bother me at the fact that I won’ receive it? Yes...and here’s why. On top of the $52 she refuses to pay me, I’m paying the full rent by myself....a whopping $1050 that I was used to paying half of.  Not only this, but I just had a car accident and need to pay $500 to repair my vehicle.. And this is all on top of my already outrageous bills for my car, student loans, insurance, cell phone, utilities, gas, EZ pass, gym, medical/therapy bills, you name it.  I am in over my head when it comes to money and it enrages me that someone who was once my best friend can just blow me off and basically say a big fuck you to the fact that I’m struggling. I sometimes wish I was raised with a smaller heart, that I wasn’t raised to be a good decent human being, because I would love to screw someone over one day, not pay them the money I owe, and not lose any sleep over it. The downside is, I’m not, and never will be that person...and I find it hard to be proud of who I am at the moment when I continuously get the shit end of the stick. But really though, $52 won’t change my life for the better or for the worse. Would it help that she pay it? Yes. Would it be fair and right and just that she pay it? Yes.  But truth is, kick and scream all I want, she’s not wired the way I am. She was not raised the proper way to do the right thing....and I’ve learned this time and time again from living with her.....the endless constant fights we had...I’ve never met anyone more stubborn or selfish in my entire life... It continually blows my mind that I even put up with her bullshit for a full year...let alone be her best friend without even really knowing her for 4 years.. I will continue to be who I am, just now have another lesson under my belt about trusting people when it comes to money.  i’ve never really been one to trust anyway when it came to that, because I’ve been burned before. People have a bad habit of never paying you back, or oh so conveniently “forgetting” even though I’ll always stick to my word and pay what I owe to who I owe, no matter the relationship. It’s another one for the books, and I need to swallow my anger and move on, despite the lingering feeling of hate I have towards someone with complete lack of regards to anyone but herself. I’ve never met such a selfish person in my life, and I am appalled at the fact that I was ever friends with such a human. My 20′s has also taught me that the friends I have, aren’t ones that are forever. I deserve more in my life than selfish, entitled, and dramatic people... Why do I attract such people when I am not at all like them? It’s time to start creating a life with more fulfillment and meaning... This is me making peace with a situation that is dissatisfying...  Onto bigger better things, Karma will come around someday. 

DOING THIS ONE THING BEFORE GOING TO SLEEP CAN ‘TRICK’ YOUR BRAIN INTO LETTING GO OF ANXIETY | Click The Link To Find Out More https://bit.ly/3AFRSMj

time is ticking too fast to hold personal grudges. #LettingItGo (at DeSoto, Texas) https://www.instagram.com/p/CJO7XlrsP0B1411qJ6KD_z8FblM9ZYMRzISx1Y0/?igshid=l9vks288jnc0

Today's drop off at Out of the Closet! It is so great to let go of all of the things that no longer serve us and know their sales will benefit the lives of others 🥰❤ Thanks for the love and assistance @1.lovely.vegan 🖤💋 #gratefulthankfulblessed #outwiththeold #lettingitgo #release #themove #tuesday #picoftheday #photooftheday #potd (at Atwater Village) https://www.instagram.com/p/CDfKMNYjou4/?igshid=1wwzoawaafw6t

My December 1️⃣2️⃣ #fullmoon 🌚 ritual is quite simple....💖😇 #reflect 🤔 #journal 📝 #lettingitgo 🚮 #havecourageandbekind - to myself #letmyheartdream - setting new intentions, discovering new paths....✨💓 . . What is your 12/12 full moon ritual? What do you see yourself creating in the year 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣ ? . . . Shop online www.preciousmoments.gifts - 14ct Disney Jewellery #Disneymantra collection - wearing disney wisdom as a fashion accessory . . . #disneyinspired #disneystyle #disneykeytolife #disneyquotes #disneyvibes #bangles #disneymoon #disneydreams #disneyprincess #disneyjournal #creativejournaling #disneydreams #disneyaddicts #bijouxlovers #december12 #disneyintentions #settingintentions #frozen #princessaurora #cinderella #disneymiracles #Disneymagic #disneydeutschland #disneybe (at Antwerp, Belgium) https://www.instagram.com/p/B58mY27Hloq/?igshid=19c2qomw6882h

This giant leaf 🍁 hit the ground #lettingitgo https://www.instagram.com/p/B3n0C56DbjW/?igshid=hbsl44j2ppgu

Just a little poem about how difficult letting go can be and the circumstances life throws at us @the_lgh . . . . . #lettinggoquotes #neverlettinggo #lettinggoofthepast #lettingitgo #lettinggoishard #poemsporn_ #poemsofinstagrams #poemsofinsta #finallylettinggo #poemofthenight #poemoftheday #instapoetrylib #instapoetry #instapoetryworld #instapoemgram (at Perth, Western Australia) https://www.instagram.com/p/B0JAr0qF4Lc/?igshid=7sfyfo84pk42