#lets push things forward

Violissima 🦉

Violissima

cecile_hoodie I’ve a message for those who feel bad and I will tell you how I survived despite dark ideas and heroin. I’ve always been someone who looked « different ». I often felt like the « weirdo ». As a child I wrote and drew a lot, I was in my own world. As a teenager it was worse, and with everything I saw in the media and around me, my hypersensitivity started to make me really sad. At 16 years old, a story about aggression which I already mentioned in a previous post made things even more dark and complicated for me, my outlook on life and my hatred of myself. After high school I started to feel worse and worse. I tried to kill myself once, more to call for help than to actually die, and then I discovered free parties and drugs. A lot of drugs. From a festive consumption I started to have a destructive consumption, until using heroin for 4 years (fortunately never injected, « just » smoked). I managed to stop thanks to my parents, my doctor, and my loved ones, when my boyfriend of that time got arrested. But I became addicted to substitution treatment for several years too. And then I got pregnant by accident I had to make a choice and I chose to stop overnight my treatment, alcohol and cigarettes. The motivation was so strong that I succeeded . Now dark ideas are become very rare, I do parties, I enjoy life but have never relapsed into heroin. When I think back to the person I had been for years and who I am now, I am proud of myself and I feel that all the weaknesses I have had are now my strengths. My sensitivity allows me to do my art and transmit messages to people, and my past experiences allow me to have a great perspective on life and to feel stronger than ever. I know that if I survived all of this, I don't fear much anymore, as long as my son and I are fine. I know that my personal messages often have a positive impact on some of my followers. So I'm telling you all this, if you ever feel sad, weird, and crappy, that doesn't mean that in a few years it will always be the case, and that you can never be happy and proud of yourself again. And even if you meet people who will make you feel like you are a loser, one day you will understand that you have won.