#leonitag

. I started writing this post and then derailed by scrolling on twitter. Hi I'm back. Ok

I'll start off by saying how insanely hyper aware and verbose saki is 😭?????? it genuinely baffles me. I used to think she was some distant cousin to the phrase "all sunshine and rainbows" but I stand corrected now. each time saki felt down in the event [and in the mainsto preceding stella too and likely in following events] she managed to define the root of her sadness, what could influence it, and what she needs to do [or so thought, before overexerting herself and getting a fever Again].

the way she has such a set in stone idea of youth also. I would like to say that her illness influencing her daily life is portrayed very well, at least in my experience as a person who used to have a physical disability that used to hinder my ability to do regular things on bad days in a similar manner saki. and the constant reminder to pace yourself, immediately thrown into the garbage by saying You can handle it, just balance it out by resting later, pushing yourself, regretting it hugely afterwards........ eyes always on the clock. saki wants to live out her idea of a teenage life so desperately, yet she fails to realise that the frivolity of being a young person is not checking the time, being spontaneous, letting plans crash into each other, just not managing yourself in a sustainable way Lol. and with how meticulous saki is about planning her hangouts...... it's not a bad trait at all, to organise things and enjoy doing so. it's just the constant reminder that I Missed Out Due To My Illness That Follows Me Every Day, I Need To Compensate for it is more draining than she likely realises ... I wonder if this will be touched on later, given how emotionally aware and expressive about her feelings saki is to a degree

.. .. like I am genuinely astounded. her step-by-step way of discovering the cause of her emotions is inspiring, I can imagine. shiho could take notes I think

Speaking of which I cannot imagine what it's like to be shiho in this repeated situation. it's gotta be an awfully thin line to tread, assigning yourself to discipline and proper practice, and allowing yourself to come to terms with the fact that your friends can't always follow through. it's a lot complex and nuanced than what I just described, of course. shiho's cold-turkey approach to saving the reputation of her friends was in good faith to them and them only, as she made no effort to cleanse her own name, all she cared about was the three [albeit two, given saki was still hospitalised]. her love for them is very obviously written in how she urges them to be diligent and disciplined and integrate band practice into their daily lives so they can be together. so imagine all these mental gymnastics shiho had to overcome in very quick succession, seeing how stella is literally the first event in the game, and then notice your beloved childhood friend collapse not Once but Twice, (in)directly caused by your emphasis on putting effort into music. Man I'd just Kill myself

saki's way of treating this repeated slip-up from shiho is once again extremely generous. genuinely, saki is such a kind hearted and positive girl, it makes me scream silently at my laptop. so patient, so tolerant. and then she puts the blame on herself too ?? ????? 🥹 uts so over. goodnight everyone

I'll talk about honami extensively in another post since I'm in the middle of reading her first focus but I'll just quickly mention that her taking charge (of getting saki to safety) so quickly is amazing foreshadowing like genuinely god tier . and the sekai planetarium they did? and when she spoke about regulus I genuinely had to hold back a sob. fuucckkk honami Ilove you

I HAVEN'T TALKED ABOUT ICHIKA YET!!!! SHIT!!!!!!!!!! not even in the previous post. ummmm my thoughts are kind of jumbled right now since I'm still emotional over hona eueueu I think I'll do ichika justice when I read Knock the future But in the meantime I would like to say that she is such a good speaker. I know she pulls That move in rwy and that her frontwomanship (????? is that a word. it is now) really shines in how well she manages to talk. always says the right stuff. when she met shiho in the mainsto [after icsksh made up] and shiho was feeling down for telling hn off then ichika lifted her spirits effortlessly. when saki was feeling anxious and crying about how she's running out of time, after luka comforted saki, ichika also joined in about how they have time, how they're going to be together forever, which almost immediately tugged saki out of her misery. it's amazing really. she's such a sweet talker but she genuinely means it. I adore her. I can't wait to read her first focus. I know a lot of the people in the prsk community lovingly berate her and put her down affectionately but there's a huge huge lot to ichika. she is so admirable even this early into the story and I cannot wait to learn more about her

idek where to start dude............. I'm just so so glad I managed to get into stories, genuinely. I already have stella opened on another tab [despite already reading it] and I can't wait to get to reading it when I have time sometime later.

it is just so heartbreakingly obvious how much they care about their own peace and the wellbeing of others. ichika's a grade one yearner with how badly she missed the other three. saki willingly dropping the idea of being in a band, one of the symbols of youth, a possibility to be with her beloved friends [friends is a very sparing term], she put her hands up with a smile and told honami that it's okay, she doesn't want to interfere with friendships (coughs)) honami had already established, saki wants the best for her.... ... saki they're gonna kill you with hammers Do you know that. your heart is too huge

honami's act of self preservation is really interesting to me cause it doesn't exactly extend to the other three, it's what honami chose to do to protect herself and herself alone, I think .. .. aah I may have missed it, honestly, but when her choice to discard her naturally kind tendencies and just stick blindly to her core classmates was being discussed, there was no mention of "protecting the others" or "cutting ties to not taint their reputation", the latter being what shiho did. it is true that at those moments honami's act was a deep rooted (leo)need to be heard, not discarded, not ignored, it Was all about her, not about ichika, saki or shiho, which I find extremely fascinating given how [at least in the mainsto] saki (I think?) claimed that honami always puts others' (leo)needs before her own so I wonder what caused honami to start running away from her friends that she ached to be close with again but didn't in fear of being shunned once again .... ........ I will dwell on this thought, I need to let this story digest

as for shiho... dreamy sigh I love you shiho My heart <3 she is so dear to meAnd yet she was [WAS] so painfully cold. I adore how in ch 11 she just broke the cold guise and spilt everything to ichisaki. shiho you also get a gold star in yearning. she is blunt, she is very honest, she is .. irritable, sure. not a short fuse, but it's easy to get on her nerves clearly ........ regardless she adores the other three very much. it was a drastic move on shiho's part to cut all ties and distance herself from them, but I will say it's understandable to a degree ?

-- I haven't been in a situation where I needed to save my name or someone else's so harshly, so I cannot be the best judge of this... but we can see that shiho's noticing of the fact that her name being dirtied spreading onto her beloved friends was the final straw. I'm sure there's some degree of truth in shiho's words that she doesn't care if her classmates talk crap about her [shiho] but hearing negativity about you All day Every Day surely has some subconscious effect on your self perception over a period of time Whether you like it or not. still, heroic act, much? not really. it was sudden. I'm not sure what to add. I need time to articulate myself on this better.

it had just come to my attention I had spoken about ichika and saki very sparingly but I am tired and shiho is my favourite character [from leoni, from the entire cast also] so I will speak on them Later I Hope but I would just like to note that ichika's charisma is genuinely un-shatterable. I Just Made That Word Up. (see now you are curious. which is why I will elaborate later). and saki's heart and optimism is something we could all use, I think. she is genuinely so ....... man I'm gona cryu............ so tolerant, so forgiving, so kind hearted. so nice </3 tenma saki you are the biggest heart ever . starts bawling eyes out