#learningreflections

Introduction: By looking for/ recognizing underlying emotions, I began to understand the importance of human connection when telling my personal story. As Johnson said, drama and surface events are the waves of a story, but the emotions that people can relate with and connect to are the underwater current that brings them along for the ride. While writing my mood change scene, I thought about other people who might have been in a similar, if not the same situation I was in (hearing that my grandma was in the hospital for heart surgery.) So with that in mind, I wrote the scene so that everyone could see the inner turmoil I began to face just by hearing that my grandma was in the hospital.

Chapter 1:  My favorite part of this section was when Johnson talked about what other writers and directors look for in scripts, one of the answers being "angry big! sad big!" To me, the word big means that the emotion needs to jump off the page and get in your face. By channeling big emotions that we all feel in a variety of situations, I think I will be able to better relate to my audience. While I wrote the mood change scene, I tried to write in emotions that everyone knew of and could imagine themselves feeling. The scene I wrote is not about being loud and fighting for yourself, but about being serious and understanding of the circumstances. However, If this was a short film, I can see how an actor would be able to pull of a "big" emotion just by using their face, and so this is how I would be able to reach the audience. 

Chapter 2: Most often, I came up with a family story. My family and I have traveled to many places, weathered many storms, and celebrated many milestones together, so it was really no surprise that everything I wrote down was in some way connected to the bigger picture that is my family. 

What I found to be very helpful and interesting was the expert from Barry Jenkins about creating his characters as Arab-American's, even though he himself was not an Arab-American. This section was interesting because it shows that even though Jenkins is not Arab-American, he pushed himself to better understand them and relate to them so that overall, his audience could relate to himself and his characters. 

Chapter 3:

Chapter 4:

I’m sitting in my room doing homework and listening to music. My head bobs with the music and I pull at my lower lip as I think about the questions on the page in front of me. It’s not a hard assignment, so once I finish a problem, I sit back in my chair and sigh. I stretch my arms over my head and roll my shoulders, loosening myself up for the problem. I pick up my pencil and lean over the desk, my shoulders hunched and my chin tucked into my free hand. My eyes often wander, as I would rather be doing anything but this work right now.

Suddenly, my phone rings. I look over and an amused smile comes over my face. It’s my mommy. I answer the fun with a happy hello, setting down my pencil as I lean back in the chair. My mom’s voice is a little more serious than normal, something has to be up.

(Prefer no dialogue, but will put here)

Mom: Lu, its grandma. Her heart rate got really high today, so we had to take her to the hospital today. She’s in the emergency room right now.

Amber: Should I come right now.

Mom: She’s doing better, and is resting now, but I think you should come.

Amber: Okay, I’m on my way.

(End dialogue)

As the conversation goes on, my brow deepens and my mouth starts to frown. My jaw is clenched tight as I listen to my mom explain grandma’s condition. When I answer her, my words are short, clipped and strained. This can’t be happening. My grandma is so young, she has to be okay. When I hang up the phone, I close my eyes and take a deep breath, my elbows resting on the desk and my hands clenched together. I'm not crying, but I am afraid and stunned. Not my grandma, please not my grandma. 

This week we read a lot of stories, all of which we needed to look for the heart in. 

1. I first watched the oral story of "Japanese Mosh Pit" from The Moth. The storyteller recounts the time he went to a Japanese rock concert wherein he became consumed by the crowd. The heart of his story for me was his change in personality from beginning to end. At the beginning of his story, he's in the mosh pit getting tossed around, beaten by elbows and feet, with his glasses being knocked askew. There is sort of a quiet moment when he stoops to pick up his crumbled, crowd stomped glasses, and then he transforms in to a monster befitting a mosh pit. If he gets pushed, he pushes back, if someone tries to climb him like a tree, he peals them off and flings them away like King Kong. Really, his story is about how we have to change depending on the situation, especially if it is to protect ourselves. 

2. Ordinary shoes is the story of a daughter recounting the greatness of her mother's rolling skating skills. The heart of her story is in the idea of lost time. There was a time when her mom was a great skater, but is now a 80 yr old women who has changed over time. The one word I would use to describes 

3. The first hippocampus story I read was a little strange in that there was no central idea going on. It is the story of how a middle aged woman realized her dream to teach on an Native American Indian Reservation. There are highs and lows to teaching, especially with young kids whose first language may not be english, but overall, it was a collection of stories that were difficult to find a commonality between except for teaching. If the author had given more than just a narrative of her time on the reservation teaching, I think readers would be more likely to read her entire piece instead of skimming it when it became apparent that there was no true "beating" heart to the story. 

4. The other story I read on hippocampus was very good, in that it was a great balance of narrative and reflection. Is this a date? was written by a Muslim woman and recounts her first time alone with a guy. The story reveals much about the author's faith and her moral obligation to follow the rules of it, and also how it can be difficult to balance her faith and morality while attending college classes with people who don't share her views, and are completely ignorant of her religion. The story's heart comes in the form of the author standing up for herself and her religion when she realizes that the man is going to far and she if uncomfortable with the situation. Overall, this was my favorite story of whole set.

5. The last story I read, or rather listened to, was the previous student project titled, "my reconciliation with my femininity". This story is extremely personal, and I was actually uncomfortable with listening to it. The heart of the author's story is in the title, "femininity". The combination of narration and reflection was absolutely perfect, and very touchingly revealed. Never in a million years would I reveal that I had been pregnant before starting college. That is a story that stays with me; but then again, I have never denied that I am feminine, or hated being feminine in any way. I don't have to reconcile that part of my self with anything, so I can understand why the author chose to speak her story. This story would be a great message to get to all girls and women who are struggling with accepting a part of themselves that is key part of who we are; Female. Despite my discomfort, I connected with this author and felt for her like she was my own friend. 

Cheers, 

The Moth Presents Anthony Griffith: The Best of Times, The Worst of Times:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdBJ1X33rXM&list=TLWW7QJfw8DEIsN3TzSLSH_jFPHo-dmy6f

When I first clicked on this story I thought based off of the description, that it'd be a comedy show and because it had the most views. When I was watching it however, i could feel his emotion. I understand that he was telling a story, but it didn't feel like he had rehearsed it at all. It felt like he was a father talking about his experience with his daughters death at the same time he was getting the best job opportunity of his life. Sometimes it felt uncomfortable to watch because he was so emotional about it all but it added to the realness. I also really liked how he started his story out the same way that he ended it. 

Audio Story: C Student Doesn't Even See it Coming:

http://digitalwriting101.net/content/student-sample-c-student-doesnt-even-see-it-coming/

The way this story teller told the story made me feel like he was reading it and it wasn't that engaging. I like to listen to stories that are compelling. He did change the sound to be echoed at certain parts and not at other parts, however I still felt a little bored when listening to it. He just needed to make it sound less like he was reading it in my opinion.

Is This a Date? by Huda Al-Marashi:

http://www.hippocampusmagazine.com/2014/05/is-this-a-date-by-huda-al-marashi/

I really enjoyed this story. I could hear the storytellers voice as I was reading. I really like the internal thoughts that were going through her head as she was having the feelings. Even though I'm not muslim, as a girl I have had the same feelings before in general so her tone made the story very relatable to a lot of people. 

Chapter 1: Foraged Love by Alexandra Risen:

http://www.hippocampusmagazine.com/2013/09/foraged-love-by-alexandra-risen/

This story was hard for me to grasp the concept of. I liked the storytellers tone behind her words, however the actual story itself jumped around too much and I couldn't tell what she wanted us as readers to take away from it. I'm still unsure and I almost feel confused as to what I just read. There were so many good topics that were mentioned but I felt that if she just chose one story to tell it would have made more sense. Like why was she telling a story about her mothers white underwear and then all of the sudden talking about her love for plants? Im confused. 

Disinformation by Allison Williams

http://brevity.wordpress.com/2014/09/10/disinformation/

Brevity

I read the post called Old Habits by Laurie Drummond http://brevitymag.com/nonfiction/old-habits/. I found the technique that the writer used to be very similar to the technique suggested in Shimmering Images where you're supposed to recall the exact details of the memory. She listed smells, clothes types, body shape and exact feelings. I could see this essay especially as a comic strip with very dramatic poses and thoughts by each character drawn out. 

Another essay I read on Brevity was called Cheekbones by Patricia Park http://brevitymag.com/nonfiction/cheekbones/. I found this essay completely different from the other one I read and a lot less of a Shimmering Images technique to it. It felt very non descriptive and as a reader I felt like I was a little confused at the purpose of the essay at the end of it. A photo essay could be an alternative method to tell this story just because it would be helpful to see the type of face Koreans find beautiful on Koreans versus the type of face that Americans find beautiful on Koreans. 

Cowbird

The Cowbird pieces were a lot more enjoyable to read. I found the images and unexpectedness of the stories a lot more attractive as a reader. The first piece i read was called A Simple Mathematical Equation by Annie Atkins http://cowbird.com/story/7367/A_Simple_Mathematical_Equation/?uiid=widget-1617030309-7367. She used a picture of a ribcage to talk about a broken heart. The doctor in her story diagnosed her with a bruised ego from her breakup. I felt like this was a creative way to address her hard time coping with her breakup. It was a way for her to look at her experience from someone else's view and describe it in that sense. This is something that I feel like the Shimmering Images author would suggest.   

Another piece I enjoyed reading was called Appreciation by Jean Luc Dushime http://cowbird.com/story/16112/Appreciation/?uiid=widget-1617030309-16112. The physical layout of the writing matched the roadtrip story that was being told. Each sentence had it's own line. It made it feel like there was more to the story than the words it was telling. I feel like this one could also be told as a photo essay. 

This week we were asked to view a couple personal story and memoir platforms, and here are just a couple thoughts I had while reading some stories. 

Cowbird

This site is interesting in how it is laid out, it sort of gives me the feeling of informality, which I guess is fine in these very simple, but revealing stories (at least the ones I read were). I read Daddy by Summer Puente first, and it happened to be an audio story. This one was pretty close to my heart, just being adopted by my step-dad and everything. I can see the Shimmering Image in this story for this author; her father is given the thankless job of taking care of his daughter, but never does he complain. The photo is of the father and daughter he cares for asleep on the couch, a moment of shared love and peace that might come rarely for both of them. This was the shimmering image for me, or it set off memories of me and my stepdad. That the story was an audio story lent more to the reality of this father and daughter story. You always hear about how hard someone else's life is, but when someone voices it, it all becomes clear. 

The next story I read on cowbird was What is life? by Alex Smith. This was the story of the author's grandfather, his life, and ultimately his passing away. The whole shimmering image behind the story for me was how life can be measured in "width", not just length. Though the grandfather lived to be 90, his life was more than years; it was the peoples' lives he touched, the strangers he said hello to on his way to work, and in his offerings of inedible food to family members. This reminded me a lot of my year abroad and how much love and compassion we poured into each other's lives, we exchange students I mean. I made a photo album for one french friend that I put a lot of time and thought and love into, and I think about it now because even though we didn't know each other for a long "length" of time, we love each other as if we had been friends for years. This is "width", touching other people's lives in ways that time can not. 

Brevity

The first story I read was Thank You by Sejal Shah. This story struck me as exactly what a memoir is; revealing something about yourself as the author through a story or memory. This story brought up the memory of feelings of loneliness, of not being a big enough part of someone's life. I've been in that position. I know that shimmering image, but more as a shimmering emotion. I remember feeling alone and that maybe it was time to find someone who had time for me and wanted me to be the center of the universe, even if it was for a short time. This is definitely a story I can relate too and can draw on for a story. 

I next read Wide Open Spaces by Kathryn Miller. This story was harder to connect with, but felt like a memoir to me nonetheless. In this story, the author seems to come to terms with the suicide of the lady who shot her when she was a child. She doesn't hold onto anger or hate or questions of why, but rather thinks about how the shooter was released from her own hate by her suicide. This is just so personal, I can't imagine it not being true in some part. The shimmering image I am trying to see here is that sometimes you can't control what happens to you in life, so it does you know good to bear animosity or hate or bitterness, because in the end, it will only hurt you. Now that I've typed it out, that is something I can relate to.