#lazyween2020

A knock cut the argument short. Jives put the bucket down and went to the door. With the paint unguarded, Trixie dived for more.

Stephanie joined Jives as he answered the door. “Grovel or treat!” Stingy cried, lifting his chin regally. He was dressed in a thick red coat and shiny crown, holding a plastic scepter that glittered with fake jewels. A plastic pumpkin hung off his other arm.

Behind him, Ziggy said with authority, “It’s ‘trick or treat’, Stingy! How could you forget?”

“I don’t want to trick people,” Stingy explained with his nose in the air. “I want them to give me sweets or bow before me!”

“Are you King Stingy again?!” Trixie called from where she was still slathering the suit with paint. “You said you were gonna be someone else this year!” 

Stingy scowled. “I am not King Stingy!” He flipped long brown hair over his shoulder in a perfect imitation of a shampoo commercial actress. “I am Queen Stingy! Long may I reign!”

Trixie and Pixel both heaved dramatic sighs. With Ziggy in tow, Stingy walked inside and immediately swiped a candy bar from the bowl beside the door. “What are you supposed to be, Ziggy?” Jives asked kindly as he shut the door against the autumn chill.  

The youngest of their group was wearing a silver cape, a black superhero eye mask, a shirt with the letters C M on it, and grey boots. His hair was wet and his face looked pink as if it had just been scrubbed clean.

“I’m the super hero Candy Man!” He declared proudly. “Only I can’t make my face look right. I wanna make a swirl like on my lollipop.”  Ziggy held up a few tubes of face paint. “Can you help?”

Jives took the paint with a grin. “Comin’ right up, my man.” 

As Jives sat Ziggy down at the kitchen table to get to work, Stephanie checked in on Trixie and Pixel. “Uh… everything okay over here?”

The suit was more red than white now. Pixel’s goggles had red fingerprints around the edge and Trixie was rubbing her sticky hands on the tarp. Pixel himself looked annoyed, holding the bucket close to his chest. “She messed it up!” He said, pointing an accusatory finger at Trixie.

Stephanie crossed her arms. “It’s her costume, Pixel. If that’s how she wanted it to look, then it’s fine.”

He grumbled but set the bucket down and stomped over to Jives and Ziggy. Trixie stuck her tongue out at his retreating back. “He takes video games way too seriously,” she said.

“You should wash your hands,” Stephanie advised. Her hands and forearms were both covered in red. 

“Eh. Adds to the look.” Trixie scanned Stephanie up and down. “Should you be getting ready too?”

Stephanie held out her arms. “I am ready.”

“You’re going as Mr. Sportacus?”

“No! I’m a yoga teacher!”

“So, you’re like a lame version of Mr. Sportacus.”

Mr. Sportacus was their gym teacher. It was no secret that he was Stephanie’s favorite teacher; she helped him clean up the equipment after class and often brought in healthy recipes for him to try. He was always kind, taught them a lot about healthy habits, showed them tricks, and helped them start their own garden just outside school.

“Yoga isn’t lame!” Stephanie argued. “You’re just saying that because Mr. Rotten said that.”

Most everyone liked Mr. Sportacus. Except for their music teacher, Mr. Rotten.

Trixie wiggled her fingers. “Careful, or I’ll poke you.”

Thus began a game of tag that had both girls screaming as they ran around the room. It only ended when Jives called, “Done!”

Everyone gathered around Ziggy, who was sporting a pink and white swirl on his face and beaming as he looked in the mirror. Jives rested his chin in one paint-dotted hand. “Well?”

“I love it!’ Ziggy hugged Jives. “Thank you thank you!! Now I’m ready to save Halloween!”

“Is that what Candy Man does?” Stingy asked through a mouthful of chocolate. 

“Yup! He makes sure to gather up a bunch of candy so everyone can trick or treat!”

There were a lot of flaws in that hero motivation, Stephanie noted, but the older kids just laughed goodnaturedly. Pixel clapped a hand on Ziggy’s shoulder. “Then we better get going, Candy Man! Almost time for us to trick or treat!”

It took another ten minutes for everyone to finish getting ready. Stringy whined about his wig getting caught on things until Jives sat him down to braid it. Pixel washed off his goggles with an apologetic Trixie. Ziggy ran around to make sure his cape flying behind him looked heroic enough. Stephanie assured him it did. 

At last they were ready to go.

“I can’t wait to get to Mr. Rotten’s house!” Trixie said as they left. The visor of her space suit was up so she could see as they walked. “He said he made it look really scary!”

Ziggy grabbed Stephanie’s arm. “C-Could I maybe skip that one?”

Jives, walking just behind them with Pixel, ruffled Ziggy’s hair. “Candy Man isn’t scared of Halloween decorations, right? He’s supposed to save Halloween, not run from it.”

“I guess…”

“I’ll stick with you,” Stephanie assured Ziggy. “That way it won’t seem scary. Okay?” He nodded vigorously. 

“Do you really think he’ll decorate though?” Jives wondered out loud. “He’s kinda lazy. I can’t see him putting up a lot of stuff.”

Being lazy was Mr. Rotten’s most known trait. If he was aware, he didn’t seem to care. Although part of his duties as music teacher was to direct the school play, Mr. Rotten had warned the kids on the first day of school not to expect dancing because it was “too much work and I hate getting all sweaty when I try to teach brats how to dance”. Singing was more than enough, he argued. Overall he was a fun teacher and introduced them to lots of different kinds of music and instruments. But the lack of dancing in their plays bugged Stephanie to no end.

She had enlisted Sportacus’ help in persuading Mr. Rotten to change his mind. This had likely been the cause of Mr. Rotten hating Mr. Sportacus. Big whoops on her part.

“If he likes something he usually puts in effort,” Trixie defended. “Remember when we told him about the bake sale by the playground? He ran right out of the classroom!”

Jives gave a low whistle. “Wish I could’ve seen that!”

“You would have if you didn’t sleep through school all the time,” Pixel teased. Jives gave a dismissive shrug followed by a yawn. His gardener costume was just a brown apron smeared with dirt. He was still wearing his characteristic hat.

The first hour of trick or treating went very smoothly. Stingy had to correct some people about his costume and Trixie’s outfit scared poor Penny Pestella who was handing out candy; but otherwise, no one in the group wandered off or fought with each other. 

Jives and Pixel kept swapping their candy because Pixel didn’t like taffy and wanted Jives’ peanut butter candy instead. Ziggy grinned whenever someone complimented his cape. When they stopped for a break, Stephanie pulled water bottles out of the bottom of her treat bag and everyone thanked her up and down.

Trixie was practically bouncing on her toes when they rounded the next block. “It’s Rotten time!” She cheered. Ziggy grabbed Stephanie’s arm again.

All six of their jaws dropped when they came to Mr. Rotten’s house. Trixie had been right— when Mr. Rotten wanted something, he put his heart into it. The walkway up to the door was covered in fake spiders and webs; some of the spiders had glowing eyes and some had legs that moved up and down. Scattered across the lawn were tombstones with gory hands and heads popping out of the dirt. A scarecrow with a slowly revolving head stood beside the door. Bats dangled from the giant tree beside the house. Among all of the decorations were a dozen perfectly carved, purple jack o’lanterns. 

“AWESOME!” Trixie yelled, racing into the yard. Ziggy was trembling, eyes on the spiders. Stingy was practically sticking his face in the nearest pumpkin with awe. Pixel tensed and took Jives’ hand as the pair walked forward. 

After some exploring and assurances, the kids all made their way to the door. “I bet his costume looks super cool!” Trixie said with barely contained excitement. “Let me ring the bell!”

“You rang it last time. It’s my turn.” Stingy reached up a hand but Trixie slapped it down. “Hey! How dare you treat your queen this way!”   

In the middle of their arguing, Stephanie pushed Ziggy forward with a wink. Smiling, careful not to stand too close to the scarecrow, Ziggy rang the doorbell. 

Stingy and Trixie whined in disappointed unison, but Trixie perked up when a witch’s cackle rang out instead of a standard bell sound. 

Then the door opened and revealed the real shock of the night.

“Hello, kids!” Mr. Sportacus greeted. His usual mustache was covered in favor of black whiskers. Black cat ears sat on his head and he was holding a blue bowl filled with candy. Other than that, he just looked like his normal self. He was even wearing the blue athletic attire he wore during gym class.

Recovering her wits first, Stephanie waved. “Uh. Hello, Mr. Sportacus. This is Mr. Rotten’s house, right?”

“Yes! He did very well on the house, don’t you think?”

“What are you doing here?” Pixel asked, clearly dumbfounded.

“Well, Rob— er, Mr. Rotten might have overdone it with the decorations. He hurt his back so he is unable to hand out candy tonight.”

“But, why are you here?” Stephanie stressed.

Mr. Sportacus grinned. “To help him, of course!”

Trixie crossed her arms. “Blue kinda sus.”

The grin faded. “What?”

“She means you’re being suspicious,” Pixel translated. “Why are you the one helping Mr. Rotten? He hates you!”

Sportacus chuckled. “No he does not. We just have different opinions, that’s all.”

“B-but!” Ziggy stammered. “He always pops the soccer balls! And he greased the handle of the gym doors one day so you couldn’t get in! He even tossed all the frisbees on the roof yesterday! He’s mean to you!”

“Well, things will be different from now on,” Sportacus said with a dreamy smile. “You could say we came to an understanding.”

Stephanie beamed. “So he isn’t gonna do mean things anymore?”

“He is. But they will be all in good fun.”

“Oh good,” Trixie said even as all the kids sighed in disappointment. “I’d hate for things to get weird around here.”

“Anyway,” Mr. Sportacus shook the bowl, “what are you supposed to say?”

Six voices confidently yelled “trick or treat!” and Stingy was the first to grab at the bowl. They all took massive handfuls. Jives put one piece of candy on the shoulder of the scarecrow with a satisfied smile. 

“I thought you said candy was unhealthy?” Ziggy asked, frowning into his candy bag. “Why are you handing it out?”

“Candy can be okay sometimes. As long as you do not eat too much!”

Sportacus looked ready to say more but a voice from further inside the house called “What is taking you so long, Sportadoof?! You’re just supposed to give out candy! Not make conversation!” Wearing a fuzzy purple bathrobe and fuzzier orange slippers, hunched over, and practically pushing Mr. Sportacus, was their music teacher.

“Mister Rotten!” All the kids cried.

Mr. Rotten glared at them. “Happy Halloween. Take your candy and go.”

“Robbie! Be nice!”

“Love your decorations, Mr. Rotten!” Trixie chirped. 

That got Mr. Rotten to smirk. “Thank you, Tricky! I think I’ve outdone myself this year. The spiders are new. Did anyone cry? Any of you?”

Ziggy slowly raised a hand. “I wanted to cry.”

Mr. Rotten stood a little straighter, winced, and hunched up again. “That’s something.”

Someone else stepped into the doorway— a girl about Stephanie’s age with bright spots of pink on her cheeks, dark hair in pigtails, and glancing out at them all. She was wearing a purple ballerina outfit.

“Hey! I’ve seen you around town!” Jives said. “So this is where you live.”

Pixel peered closer. “But you don’t go to our school…”

Mr. Rotten put a hand on her shoulder. “This is my niece, Ella. She’s just staying with me for a bit. She was going to be in charge of handing out candy until this one insisted on being helpful.” He aimed a glare at Mr. Sportacus, who just smiled back.

Stephanie caught the way Ella was looking longingly at everyone’s bags of candy. She made eye contact with Ella, whose gaze dropped to the ground. “You look nice, Ella,” Stephanie said, hoping she sounded friendly. Ella’s lip briefly twitched upwards.

Mr. Sportacus looked down at Ella, then out at the kids. He leaned close to Mr. Rotten and whispered something. Mr. Rotten looked out at their group. “Would you be willing to take Ella trick or treating with you? I can’t walk with her and I don’t want her going alone.”

The kids exchanged a look. Ziggy stepped forward and put his hands on his hips. “Candy Man never lets kids miss out on candy!”

“We’d be happy to have you!” Stephanie agreed. The others nodded eagerly. 

Ella seemed taken aback by their reactions. She disappeared from the doorway and, for a moment, Stephanie thought they had spooked her. But then she came back, grinning wide, and holding a pillowcase. With a quick kiss to Mr. Rotten’s cheek, Ella skipped out the door to stand with them. Jives gave a small wave. She waved back. 

“Well, that’s that. Have a good time.” Mr. Rotten made a shooing motion. “Now get lost.”

“I said to be nice,” Mr. Sportacus repeated.

Rolling his eyes, Mr. Rotten grabbed Mr. Sportacus by the collar and pulled him down for a kiss. All the kids gasped, except Ella. Stingy’s crown slipped off, Jives and Pixel let go of each other’s hand to over their mouths in surprise, Trixie’s visor fell over her eyes, and Ziggy and Stephanie both dropped their candy bags. 

When Mr. Rotten pulled back, evil grin on his face, Mr. Sportacus’ cheeks were as red as Trixie’s costume. He practically yelled, “Good night!” at them all before slamming the door shut. “Robbie!” They heard him cry through the door.

Mr. Rotten cackled. “You deserved it!”

“Now they will just badger us with questions tomorrow! We will not get any teaching done!”

“They’ll badger you tomorrow. I called out. On account of my aching back. Speaking off, let’s get back to watching the movie. ‘How Bad Can I Be?’ is my favorite song and it’s coming up.”