#lawki

Nesta looked around their home.

It was decorated to perfection - at least, that had been Nesta’s goal. The theme for Nyx’s second birthday was space cowboy, which had happened when Cassian wanted a cowboy theme while Nesta wanted an outer space theme.

It had been a challenge to perfect the space cowboy theme - especially when it came to a two-year-old’s birthday party.

There were aliens with cowboy hats and paper cows on UFO balloons. In the corner of the living room, there was a horse wearing an astronaut costume - a decoration that Cassian had created, and one he was quite proud of.

Nesta herself wore a “space-like” outfit that reminded her fondly of Zenon: Girl of the 21th Century. When Cassian came down the stairs, however, it looked like he had just walked out of the Wild West.

He wore chaps over his jeans, and Nesta found her mind wandering on those chaps alone.

She hoped he kept them.

They would be useful in the future.

He also wore a plaid button down and a cowboy hat.

She thought he should keep the cowboy hat, too.

Nyx, however, looked like the cutest little mess Nesta had ever seen. His onesie looked like a spacesuit, but on his head, instead of an astronaut helmet, he wore a teeny little cowboy hat. On his feet were genuine cowboy boots.

Nesta laughed as they reached the first floor landing, and Cassian’s grin widened.

“Now introducing our two-year-old space cowboy,” Cassian said, unable to control his laughter.

Nyx’s grin was wide as he clapped. “MAMA!”

Nesta laughed, taking Nyx into her arms. Yeah, he looked ridiculous, but he also looked oh so cute. “Happy birthday, sweet boy.”

Nyx took Nesta’s face in his hands and gave her a big, sloppy kiss.

With a chuckle, Nesta said, “Thank you, that was very sweet. Now, let’s go make sure everything’s ready, yeah? Our guests will be here soon.”

“Dada,” Nyx said, pointing to Cassian. “Hi-hi.”

Cassian laughed. “Hi, bud.” He went straight for the corner and adjusted his astronaut-horse.

Nesta just shook her head and brought Nyx into the kitchen.

It smelled delicious.

Nesta had spent the entire morning cooking.

At first, she had no idea what to make for a space cowboy party, but she really felt like she nailed it. She had a taco bar, which worked for every type of party, and baked and decorated a cake that looked like Cassian’s horse in a spacesuit.

It was ridiculous.

And absolutely perfect.

Nesta looked at the clock. “We have twenty minutes, Nyx. We have to make the homemade tortillas and get out the salsas.”

“What about the alcohol?” Cassian asked, sweeping into the kitchen.

Nesta rolled her eyes. “It’s our two-year-old’s birthday.”

Cassian blinked. “So, no whiskey, just wine?”

Nesta clicked her tongue. “Check the wine cabinet.”

“Yes ma’am,” Cassian winked, tipping his hat before he left the room.

Nesta snorted, even though she found it deeply charming and handsome as hell.

Yeah, she definitely hoped he’d keep that outfit.

Nesta took the dough out of the fridge that she had rolled earlier that morning and a rolling pin. When she had countless flat, doughy circles she dropped them in the oil-filled skillet one by one. Fifteen minutes later, she had a giant stack of flour tortillas and was carrying them, alongside a tray filled with different types of homemade salsas, to the table she had set up in the living room.

There was a quick knock on the door and it cracked open before Nesta could even turn towards the door.

“Oh, my.”

She laughed at Azriel’s reaction to the house, turning to see him carrying in a stack of presents, Elain’s camera bag and Persephone’s diaper bag. “Go big or go home, right?” She chuckled.

“You decided to go big at home,” he replied, shaking his head.

Nesta wasn’t surprised to see that Azriel hadn’t dressed up, wearing his traditional all-black attire instead, but a little space princess in cowboy boots ran in right after him and she couldn’t stop the grin as she looked at Seph.

Elain was a just a few steps behind, and as she came in, she dropped a black cowboy hat atop Azriel’s head. He rolled his eyes, but said nothing as he adjusted the hat, and was off in search of Cassian.

“Okay, you’ve outdone yourself,” Elain announced, beaming as she looked around the house. “This is awesome.”

Nesta shrugged. “He only turns two once, right?”

“I’ve got the wine!” Cassian announced, pushing through the kitchen door with two bottles of wine and a glass of whiskey.

Nesta chuckled. “I thought we said wine only?”

“We did,” Cassian said, setting the bottles on the table. “For the guests.”

“Am I a guest?” Azriel muttered.

Cassian snorted and motioned to follow him into the kitchen.

In the middle of the room, Nyx and Persephone were dancing to the techno space playlist Nesta had put on.

Elain laughed, quietly. “I need to get out my camera. Anything I can help with?”

Nesta shook her head. “You’re good. Take pictures and send them all to me.”

Elain promised she would, and Cassian and Azriel came back out with their full glasses of whiskey. Nesta looked around.

Elain was right.

They had done well.

Nesta hoped the rest of the guests thought so, too.

Before they knew it, the house was full, people were laughing and eating and drinking and Nesta couldn’t help but smile from where she stood to the side watching it all.

What a difference 365 days could make. Nesta couldn’t believe it as she watched Nyx and Persephone play with Viviane, who had also come dressed up, much to Nyx’s delight. He kept stealing her hat, and she let him, donning his tiny one instead, though it didn’t fit on her head.

She couldn’t help but think of the two people who were missing though. The two people who should have been here. Her eyes drifted to the cross Cassian had made, where it sat on the mantle, it’s permanent home.

A set of strong arms wrapped around her waist and she leaned back into Cassian’s embrace.

His chin was resting on her shoulder, and he said, “Nyx is happy. We’re happy. But… It doesn’t feel right without them here.”

As always, he knew exactly what she was thinking. She gripped his arms over her abdomen and held him there, letting him know she understood.

“They’re here, though,” Cassian whispered into her ear. “They’re here and they’re watching us, watching him. They wouldn’t miss today.”

Nesta nodded and held onto him tighter. If she would have tried to say a word, the tears would have come.

Sad tears because she missed her sister and brother-in-law.

Happy tears, though, because she loved Nyx, and she loved Cassian, and she couldn’t believe how far they had come in the last year.

Clearing her throat, and wiping a tear that had snuck out, she announced, “Let’s open gifts and have some cake!”

Cassian kissed her cheek before he was on the floor, Nyx climbing on top of him, and helping the two year old open his gifts.

It only took one or two gifts before he was completely distracted by trying to play and wasn’t even paying attention as Cassian opened his gifts one by one. But they made it through the pile and Nesta carried in the astronaut horse cake, which had Nyx on his feet and chanting, “Cakecakecakecakecake!”

With Cassian’s help, Nyx blew out the big “2” candle and narrowly avoided a smash cake for the second year in a row.

“Not this year, bud,” Cassian chuckled, carrying a confused Nyx to his booster seat in the kitchen. “We’re all going to eat this one. Not just you.”

His irritation disappeared as soon as Nesta sat a piece down in front of him, but he made nearly just as big of a mess as he had the year before.

“Nesta!” Elain called, and she turned from where she was cutting more pieces in the kitchen. “Come here, I want to get a picture of you guys.”

Her eyes found Cassian’s and they softened, thinking back to the picture they’d been forced to take a year before.

“Still think you’ll burst into flames if you brush arms with me?” He asked, pressing a kiss to her temple.

“Maybe,” she said, and he chuckled as she wrapped an arm around him. “But I’m not as bothered by it as I used to be.”

Cassian grinned, and Elain took a picture of their little family.

*

It was the day after Nyx’s second birthday and all three of them anxiously waited in the living room. It wasn’t that they were scared about the visit, but after last time, there was a little bit of nervousness surrounding them all.

Well, everyone but Nyx.

He was giddy as he played with all of his birthday toys.

Nesta was pacing, while Cassian watched a hockey game around the path she was wearing into the carpet.

“Come sit down, Nes,” he said, reaching for her hand. “They told us it would be this afternoon, but that could be anytime.”

“I know, I know,” she said, biting her nail. It had been a horrible habit of hers when she was younger, but now it only appeared when she was nervous

He caught her other hand in his. “Sit,” he repeated, tugging her towards. “You know what the doctor said about stress. It’s not good for—.”

A knock on the front door had Nesta bolting for it, and Nyx asked, “Hello?”

Cassian couldn’t help but chuckle as he stood and walked to him, crouching down in front of him. He smoothed Nyx’s dark hair back from his face and said, “I need you to be good today, okay? Be a good boy and daddy will take you to get ice cream after dinner.”

He nodded and repeated, “Ice cream.” Or he tried, but he couldn’t quite pronounce it.

Cassian could only grin down at him.

“You’re taking too long,” Nesta chastised, hurrying toward the door.

Cassian rolled his eyes but said nothing more as Nesta reached the door, smoothed down her non-wrinkled dress, and opened it up.

Alis Birch stood on the threshold, a folder in her hand, and, surprisingly, almost wearing a smile. “Nesta, it’s a pleasure.”

Nesta nodded, hesitantly. “Yes, you too. Come in, please.”

Alis crossed the threshold and nodded at Cassian. “Good afternoon, Mr. Nazari.” She looked at Nyx. “And glad to see you wide awake for one of my visits.”

Nyx smiled as he waved, and said, “Hi-hi.”

“Ah, he’s talking,” Alis said, going into the living room and smiling at the toddler.

“Oh, he hardly ever stops,” Cassian snorted. “Picks a new word up every day, I swear.”

“Sit,” Nesta said, sitting in the chair. “Please.”

“Thank you,” Alis said, taking her place on the couch. “I hear someone just had a second birthday.”

“Yesterday,” Nesta said, nodding. “We had a party. He had fun.”

“Good, plenty of toys and excitement, I assume?” She asked, watching as he played with a chunky, wooden puzzle made of farm animals. As if it were a gift from the gods themselves, he slid the cow into the right hole, and grinned up at Cassian. “Mooooo!”

He chuckled as he sat on the arm of Nesta’s chair. “Good job, bubba. Cows do say moo.”

He kept on grinning but went back to his puzzle.

“So,” Nesta said, clearing her throat. “What sort of questions do you have this visit?”

Alis didn’t say much, just looked around at the living room and kitchen. Cassian’s astronaut horse was still set up in the corner, as he’d insisted it was a work of art and as such, deserved to be displayed for at least a few more days. “Honestly, I don’t have many today. You two have made it very clear that Nyx is your main focus, and I can tell that he’s very happy and is thriving under your care.”

Cassian doubted she knew it, but Nesta released a breath she’d been holding and nodded. “We love him, more than anything. We— We’ll always miss Feyre and Rhys, but it’s not just about doing right by them anymore. Nyx has…” She took Cassian’s hand and continued. “He’s become our son, and we’ve become a family. And we couldn’t imagine it any other way at this point.”

Alis nodded and jotted a few notes in her binder. Nesta could have sworn a hint of a smile was on her face. “And, as far as the relationship between the two of you goes, where do we stand? It’s been a few months since we last discussed it.”

Cassian was the one to answer. “We’re engaged. We have been since Christmas, and, since Nyx’s birthday just passed, the wedding planning will start soon. And actually, we’re also—.”

“We couldn’t be happier,” Nesta said, interrupting him, holding up her left hand and showing the sparkling diamond on her ring finger. She gently squeezed his hand, and he didn’t ask, but nodded. “We couldn’t be happier and neither could Nyx.”

Alis looked from Cassian to Nesta to Nyx, and nodded. “I’m glad to hear it. I’ll put in a good report, and you have nothing to worry about. Truly, I wish you all the best.”

Nesta smiled, and it was genuine. “Thank you, Mrs. Birch. Thank you.”

“I’ll leave you all be,” Alis said, standing. She closed her binder. “If you ever need anything, please reach out.”

“We will,” Cassian said. “Thank you.”

With one last smile, she said her goodbyes and was gone.

Nesta leaned against the closed doors and sighed a loud sigh of relief. “We did it. We’re done.”

Cassian pulled her into his arms and hugged her, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “I never had any doubts.”

She pulled back and looked up at him. “I sure as hell did. Who knew an old woman could be so terrifying?”

He chuckled but shook his head. “What now?”

“We wait for Tarquin to reach out to us. There’s some official paperwork that will have to be signed after she submits her report and findings, but…” She looked over at Nyx who was still engrossed in his puzzles. “We’re officially a family.”

Smiling, Cassian leaned down to kiss her. “And we didn’t tell her about this one because…?”

His hand brushed over her abdomen, over the life that was growing inside.

“I’d say we’re entitled to a few secrets of our own,” she replied, smiling. “Besides, they’re more focused on ensuring Nyx is taken care of. We’ve proven that time and time again.”

They’d found out Nesta was pregnant just a few weeks before. Not even ten weeks, and for that reason, they hadn’t told anyone, not even Elain and Azriel.

“Fair enough,” he muttered and kissed her, again.

Nyx had walked up to them and was tugging on Cassian’s pant leg, begging to be picked up, which is exactly what he did.

They hugged him tight, and felt an overwhelming amount of peace.

A year of ups and downs and chaos had passed, but they had made it.

They were a family.