#lan-xichens

Thank you so much dearest Kris!! I did have amazing food for lunch and a really nice cake! It was great! haha Hope you had a wonderful and restful weekend! 💙💙💙💙

*sings* iiiii don’t know what I’m dooooinggg!♫ For @lan-xichens​ March Gif Challenges: Week 2: Colour a gifset using a colour palette.

after a bit of googling and a lot of trial and error I am deciding to leave this here and treat myself to something as a reward for managing to make anything at all!! 

…get over it via @ baoshan-sanren

listen IT’s THE DEVOTION that KILLS ME

every damn time I think I can understand what Lan Wangji’s feeling, where he’s coming from, I remember all over again that no, 16 years of heartbreak and regret is not something I can possibly comprehend (not something anyone can comprehend), so every time it’s like I’m just barely scratching the surface, and even that is shattering 

we see Lan Wangji standing up to the rest of the cultivation world, to his family, literally stepping in front of Wei Wuxian to protect him again and again, like he’s so determined not to miss a single beat, not to leave a single shred of doubt in Wei Wuxian or anyone else, because Wei Wuxian had spent all that time after Burial Mounds thinking Lan Wangji hates him and distrusts him

how many times has Lan Wangji gone over every single thing he said to Wei Wuxian then, every single thing he did, trying to figure out how it was possible that he could love someone so desperately, so unconditionally, and that they never saw even a single hint of it, like what kind of recriminations those 16 years gave rise to, how much self-hate for his inability to make his intentions known, to make his feelings obvious, to just say what he really means in a way Wei Wuxian could understand it 

it blows my mind every time that there has to be so much insecurity and desperation to get it right underneath all of his cool exterior but you only catch it in these small fleeting moments, when Wei Wuxian pushes him away, when you can see that Lan Wangji, the one who had spent years trying to figure out how things went so wrong and how much of it was his fault, suddenly terrified that it’s all happening again, that he hasn’t tried hard enough, hasn’t been clear enough, and that despite everything he’s done, in the end, Wei Wuxian will still push him away  

because he is who he is, and he’d never say “I spent 16 years loving you, thinking about every way I wronged you and myself, thinking about all the ways the cultivation world has wronged us both,” instead he can only step up to Wei Wuxian’s side and say “The feeling of walking on a single plank bridge till it's dark isn't so bad after all” and hope that’s enough

hi lovely! i was at work it’s why it took me a minute to answer this heh sowwy! but im glad you took it easy today that’s always good! sounds like it was a nice dayyyy❤️

i had a wonderful day thank youuuuu!!!

ahh sorry for the late response but thanks kris!! i hope you had a great bday too 🥰

Aah thank you so much, Kris! This is so sweet!!!! ❤️

💖💖 Thank you, this sounds like fun!! I wanna learn more about people in this fandom.

1) English is not my first language and I've never lived in or even visited an English speaking country. So if what I write doesn't make sense - this is why. Also, I don't understand commas in English, i just put them wherever i want to lmao.

2) I H A T E skinny jeans. Death to this trend.

3) I work in IT.

4) Been on tumblr since 2012, I’ve witnessed the rise and fall of empires.

5) I have a Thing for long hair. I think 95% of people look better with long hair than short. I'm especially tired of short hair on men - BORING! Slap a wig on an actor and suddenly I'm like 👀👀👀👌👌👌