#kurtails

The newly minted ‘Professor Colfer’ (a title he was absurdly proud of) had thought that his biggest problem with his first class would be getting through the lecture without passing out or throwing up. It was the hell slot too, nine am on a Monday morning and the students drifting in looked exhausted and fed up before he had even opened his mouth. He swallowed nervously, hoping that at the very least, the ones clutching coffee mugs bearing the familiar campus cafe insignia would perk up soon.

He gave it to nearly ten past nine before he went to close the door, he didn’t want to appear too anal, and just as he did so a last minute straggler rushed in, almost bashing straight into him.

"Oh sorry, man!" the boy chirped, giving him an affable grin. Chris just got the impression of a mop of curly hair and a wink of honey colored eyes and then the boy was hurrying past him, sliding into an empty seat near the front.

“Darren” a girl hissed from a few rows back. She gestured to the empty seat beside her. But the boy, Darren, just waved and grinned, not bothering to move. He pulled a pen out of his pocket and bummed some paper off the kid next to him and then turned to look at Chris expectantly. Chris felt himself unexpectedly blush under the power of his gaze. He quickly tore his eyes away and cleared his throat.

“Alright, let’s have a bit of quiet please!” he called. And ok he had to admit he got a tiny power rush as the contented chatter lulled almost instantly. “I’m Professor Colfer and hopefully you’re all here for Creative Writing 223. Um... if you’re not, I’m sorry to tell ya that you just needlessly dragged yourself out of bed on a Monday morning.”

There was a soft laugh following his words and Chris felt himself relax a little. This wasn’t nearly as hard as he feared. In fact he associated it with the feeling he used to have when he was doing amateur dramatics at the local community theatre. These kids were just a new audience.

“Well nobody left so that’s a good sign” he joked. “Now at the end of each row, there’s a course break down so if you could just pass those out please...”

He got into his flow for a while. This was something he had practised a dozen times in front of his mirror at home and then, when he got sick of looking at himself, a less than impressed Brian. And the kids seemed as engaged as you could expect them to be in the introductory lecture, making the odd note even though Chris knew that all the important information was already written down for them, he was just talking them through it.

“First assignments are due in week three so...” Chris jolted to a halt. His eyes, doing a steady sweep of the room, had just settled on Darren again. Darren was watching him intently with the kind of rapt attention that Chris wouldn’t have expected from a guy that wandered in late, looking like he had just got out of bed. Worse than that he was idly sucking the end of his pen and the purse of his lips and the shift of his jaw was extremely distracting. Chris was suddenly very glad that he hadn’t taken Ashley’s advice to imagine them all in their underwear because his brain was already doing very inappropriate things with, what was, a fairly innocent gesture.

“Um sorry, lost my thread for a moment there. And I was doing so well too!” It was probably his imagination that Darren looked a little bit smug, even as he joined in with the gentle laughter. Chris blinked and tore his eyes away, determined to look elsewhere for the rest of the lecture.

“Er yes... Your first assignments are due in week three and it’s a very simple introductory piece, only a thousand words. We really want to see what you can do with limitations before we really set you flying.

“Right I think that’s all the dry, boring stuff out the way. Sorry, but it’s got to be done. Now as I’m sure you’re aware, a large part of this module will involve reading and critiquing each other’s work so I think it would be helpful for you to split into groups. Don’t worry, they’re not forever, we’ll mix it up every few weeks so you can get to know lots of different styles of work. But for now if you just wanna get into groups of six...’ Chris paused. He was being met with a lot of unimpressed faces right now. He didn’t really blame them. Group work was sort of his own personal nightmare in high school. But this was different. The course really couldn’t function unless they were prepared to interact with each other. “Come on guys, don’t be shy. Just grab some people close to you.”

Another long pause, long enough that Chris could feel himself getting nervous again and then finally, thankfully, chatter started to bleed into the silent lecture hall. The girl that had waved Darren over earlier grabbed her bag and swung down a few rows to settle in next to him and Darren grinned broadly at her and pressed a quick sloppy kiss to her cheek.

“Darren, gross” she snapped but looked more resigned than mad. “Hi, I’m Meredith” she added to the group at large.

Chris allowed himself to zone out for a moment as introductions started to fly around the room. He could feel the passion in these kids though and it made him hopeful. There were prospective novelists, poets, screenwriters and even songwriters all over the room. This was why he had wanted to become a teacher. To nurture all this potential.

He was lurched out of his reverie by Darren. Of course. He wasn’t being particularly loud but he was the sort of person that seemed to command attention without having to raise his voice.

“I’m Darren. I’m from San Francisco. I’m majoring in musical theatre but thought I’d dabble a little in creative writing too. I’m a singer/songwriter like Mere.”

Chris nodded to himself. Figured that he was a drama kid. He tried to take a general sweep of the room but he found his eyes always drifting back to Darren’s little group. He wasn’t sure what it was about this guy. He was just another scruffy student who looked like he had probably slept in the clothes he was wearing. Admittedly a very classically handsome scruffy student, but still. He shouldn’t be anything special.

Chris could see that it wasn’t just him that was drawn in by this boy’s strange charisma. There was a genuine, robust enthusiasm about him that made him extremely likable even within moments of knowing him. The only one in his little group that seemed completely unimpressed with him was Meredith, who just wore a look of fond exasperation. The other’s were hanging onto his every word and the two other girls were openly flirting.

Chris let them chat on for a little longer before he wrapped up the lecture, telling them what he expected for the next session, which wasn’t until Thursday.

“Ok that’s it guys. You’re free to go back to bed if you want too. If you have any questions, I’ll be happy to answer them.”

There were a few students that stayed around to talk to him and Chris tried not to notice that Darren was one of them, hanging back slightly to let the others go first.

“Dare, you coming?” Meredith asked in surprise and Chris struggled gallantly to keep up with the needlessly anxious ramblings of the girl he was talking to but it was too late. He had tuned into their conversation.

“Yeah in a bit. I just want to ask something.”

“You want to ask something” Meredith said slowly. “You want to ask something? Usually you’re the first one out.”

Darren merely nodded. “Don’t worry about waiting. I’ll catch up with you at Joe’s.”

Meredith looked more than a little suspicious about the whole thing but eventually she just shrugged. “Alright. See ya.”

Chris quickly dispatched the other students, until it was just him and Darren alone, which felt more dangerous than it should have.

“First class, huh?” Darren said suddenly, breaking the silence.

Chris blinked. That wasn’t the sort of question he had been expecting. “Er... yeah. Is it that obvious?”

Darren grinned and Chris felt something curl pleasantly in his stomach at the sight of it.

“Well no offense, Professor, but when I nearly bashed into you earlier, I thought you were another student. Otherwise I might have been a little more courteous. Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it. Easy mistake to make.” Chris couldn’t really be offended. He was twenty six and he still got IDed in bars. “Was there anything else I can help you with Mr...?”

Darren laughed, sudden and bright and Chris couldn’t help but smile. “Criss” he said eventually. “But please, call me Darren.”

“Darren” Chris repeated softly, testing the name in his mouth for the first time.

“Well I very much look forward to this course. I’m sure I’ve never had a professor like you before.” Darren’s voice was dangerously smooth and Chris was suddenly struck by how close he was. He took an unsteady step back and then disguised the fact that he was basically running away by reaching for his messenger bag.

“That’s a good thing I hope” he said, trying to keep his tone light. He wasn’t sure he succeeded.

“Very good” Darren practically purred and ok he was definitely flirting and this was definitely not good. “Well, see you Thursday” he said and suddenly he was turning, walking away with an easy sort of saunter that Chris definitely wouldn’t be able to pull off. He tried not to look at Darren’s retreating ass. He failed.

  *

  He wasn’t in the least bit surprised to find Ashley on his couch when he got back.

“There’s Professor Colfer” she grinned. “How was the first day? Any problems?”

Yeah, one. And his name is Darren Criss. “Nah. It was great actually! There’s a great crop of kids there. I’m really looking forward to reading what they turn out.”

“Well that’s probably a good thing. I sense that reading shit is going to be a large part of your future.”

Chris swatted at her. “Hey! It’s not going to be shit.” He paused. “Ok some of it will probably be shit. But not all of it.”

Ashley just laughed. “You hungry, Prof? Because I totally ordered pizza to celebrate your heroic return to the hells of higher education.”

“Very.” He aimed a kiss at her cheek. “This is why you are my best friend.”

“That and the tequila” Ashley said.

“Yeah” Chris agreed. “And the tequila.”

  *

The week went quickly, the stress of settling into a new job somewhat overcome by the pure joy Chris had in it. This was what he was supposed to do with his life, he was sure of it. The kids were interesting and insightful and imaginative and Chris was consistently blown away by the portfolio’s he skimmed through. Of course his 223 class, Darren’s class didn’t have a portfolio yet but that was all part of the process and Chris was looking forward to helping kickstart them.

“One on one sessions!” he cried enthusiastically in the Thursday class. “If you have any questions about starting your portfolio or you want me to read something over then come and see me during my office hours. Wednesdays and Fridays, ok? You can email me or there’s a signup sheet on the door. Or hey, just drop in. Chances are I’ll be available.”

Darren, who was sitting front and center, almost like he was deliberately taunting Chris, seemed to perk up at that. Chris really wasn’t sure he wanted to know why.

Still, it wasn’t really a surprise when Darren came rocking up the very next day looking unfairly gorgeous despite the fact he was wearing nothing more exciting that jeans and a Michigan shirt.

“Darren, do come in” Chris said warmly, trying not to let his resignation and apprehension register on his face.

“Thanks, Professor.” Darren did actually look curiously nervous and Chris decided to give him the benefit of the doubt.

“So, how can I help?”

“It’s the portfolio. Most of my creativity lies in songwriting and a bit of script writing. I was wondering if that was appropriate for a portfolio?”

Chris smiled gently. “Well ideally you want a mixture of your best works in your portfolio but that can certainly involve some script writing if you wish. So music is where your interests lay, huh?”

Darren’s face absolutely lit up and Chris was disarmed by just how radiant it made him look. And Darren was off with shining eyes and expansive gestures that made Chris smile privately to himself. Darren spoke about music with such passion and enthusiasm. It was clearly the air that he breathed in the way that reading had always been for Chris and despite the fact they had got completely off topic, Chris didn’t have the heart to stop him until Darren finally ground to a halt himself.

“Wait, what was the question? Sorry, I was being an asshole.”

Chris was startled into a laugh and Darren grinned, looking a touch pleased with himself. Chris leaned over the desk slightly, bridging his fingers together.

“Darren, trust me, if you bring the same energy and enthusiasm to your work as you do to your music then you have nothing to worry about. Just try and write about the things that inspire you.”

“Oh I’m sure I’ll find a whole lot to inspire me in your class, Professor” Darren said and it was so cheesy and stupid but Chris blushed, feeling flustered. He drew away uncertainly, leaning back in his chair. Darren was a student. A student with ridiculously kissable looking lips and a propensity to flirt and this jawline, Jesus Christ.

“Professor?” Darren said, sounding unsure.

“Well if that’s all, Mr Criss, I have other students to see.”

“Oh” Darren said and he looked crushed and Chris wanted to curse him for his wonderfully expressive face for making him feel like the world’s biggest douche. “I can come back though, right?” he said hopefully. “When I write something.”

Chris softened. “Of course, Darren. My door is always open. On Wednesdays and Fridays between three and six.”

Darren laughed, looking happier, and Chris grinned too.

“Awesome. Well see you later then.”

“Bye, Darren.”

After Darren was gone, Chris slumped forward on his desk and groaned into his arms. Damn Darren for being dark and curly and exactly his type. He was ridiculously attracted to this guy. One week into the job and he was already a horrendous screw up. Must be some kind of record.

*

By the time Chris had had an evening of sushi and beers with Ashley and Lea, he had convinced himself that Darren wasn’t actually a problem at all. He was just a student. One of many. One of so many in fact that Chris was sure he would have forgotten about him by the end of the next week. It wasn’t even a crush really, it was just a momentary... thing. He was fine. No problems here.

His sleeping mind seemed to disagree. His dreams plied him with images of Darren. Specifically Darren sinking kiss swollen lips down over his cock. He would be loud, his brain decided. All broken moans and rough pleading. And he would stare up at Chris with those wide honey eyes, looking so pleased with himself because he was the one making Chris fall apart. He dreamed of taking Darren hard up against the wall, roughly so he could hear him cry out and beg for it and he could suck bruising kisses into his neck. And then over the desk, with a perfect view of that gorgeous ass. Chris might have had a problem with the fact that he had apparently turned into a walking cliche overnight but as he woke up with a raging hard on, he didn’t really have the capacity to care.

He only wasted a few moments trying to settle into his usual wank bank material and a few more debating the moral implications before he gave up and let Darren’s face swim into his mind’s eye. He was sure that Darren would be an enthusiastic and generous lover, just judging by the way he interacted with people. The fact that he didn’t really know Darren at all didn’t particularly worry him at that moment. He just let a hand slide down his body, imagining it was Darren’s lips.

He cupped himself through his boxers for a moment before shoving them down his hips and giving his cock one deliberate stroke. He sighed, a small sound of pleasure, shutting his eyes and letting Darren’s smirking face take over. He thrust up into a loose fist, slowly, because Darren would be a fucking tease.

He lost himself in fantasy, whimpering at the slow, rough drag of his hand over his cock.

“Darren” he murmured, sweat beading his brow. He moaned lowly as his other hand brushed lower, teasing over where he wanted it. He momentarily debated getting the lube out but his dreams had already made him embarrassing close to coming so he decided to just get on with it.

The Darren in his mind grinned, would probably say something like I’m sorry, Chris, did you want something?

Everything was a little bit too dry and raw, skin catching on skin but it just added to the building pleasure until Chris was thrusting helplessly up into his own fist, heat curling up his spine. He gasped out Darren’s name again, high and desperate. Come on, baby. Wanna see you come. And with that particularly pleasing mental image, Chris spilled over his fist, his back arching with a soundless cry.

Chris didn’t allow himself to bask long before he was up, rushing to the shower like he could somehow wash away what he had done. He was sure there was rule in the professor handbook that said Thou shalt not wank over your students or something. And if there wasn’t there should be, because he felt fucking awful now. He wasn’t entirely sure how he was supposed to look Darren in the eye after this one. Maybe he should just quit his job and join a monastery.

Luckily his phone blaring into life in the next room derailed him from that particularly idiotic train of thought. He let it ring out, letting the heat of the shower soothe away some of the shame.

This was nothing, he decided. Just a thing. Not a crush. Definitely not a crush. He only had to last two semesters and then Darren Criss would be out of his hair. He would go into work on Monday and just be totally normal Professor Colfer. He would be a consummate professional. Or something.