Fun question! Different definitions abound.
To me, Garden Party Polyamoury prioritises collective ease, enjoyment and openness. I've found it be the spacious, choiceful and easeful version of Kitchen Table Polyam (KTP). Garden Party Polyam is about being open to connecting with metamours, in ways that flow for everyone's enjoyment. It could be playing games and having breakfast around the same table, it could be sharing events or hobbies. It could be only sharing time while the hinge partner is present, or it could be metamours kicking it off and having a grand ol' party while their partner is elsewhere (any of which could also be true of KTP). The point is - in GPP everyone gets to do what they want, with consideration the experience of the other party attendees, without having to set stringent rules to make that happen. Be a good guest, be a kind host, reach towards others with friendship and trust in the best intent.
I orient towards Garden Party Polyamoury because I've had experiences of KTP where metamour's anxiety was leveraged to set rules and secure control. I find rules tend to suck. Changing behaviour for someone elses anxiety generally positively reinforces the anxiety - oh, being loud about being anxious meant I didn't have to deal with the uncomfortable thing, guess I can repeat that infinitum. Other people have had better KTP experiences and still like the term.
Some people have apparently interpreted GPP to mean only cross over with metamours at events and being parallel otherwise??? To which I ask, why are you partying with people you don't want to hang out with otherwise?
GPP gives me a sense of freedom and agency to maneuver and partake in the vibes I enjoy. If the music is too loud in one part of the garden, I can float over to a different portion. The second that I "must" sit at the kitchen table, share a calendar, or report in my time balances and new dates, I'm out. I have persistent desire for autonomy, and my experiences of KTP didn't fit. I hold emotional space professionally and am resistant to offering that to new ppl in my life. I'm Garden Party Polyam cause I'm committed to offering a good vibe, and I wanna share life with people who are far enough along with non-monogamy that they're ready to party too.
