Alex: Morning, sunshine. 🌞

Alex: Babbbeee, your poor ankle :( You really just can't catch a break with those, can you? I'm putting you in a bubble from now on.

Alex: Kel?

Alex: Hi.

Alex: I'm just gonna stop beating around the bush and say what I need to say because I can't take it anymore.

Alex: I miss you. So much. I'm sorry for everything. I don't even know how we got here but nothing about it feels right and I hate it.

Stealing Kelley away for some quality bff time was nothing out of the ordinary for Alex but she had been especially anxious to since seeing her ex Fergal. She needed someone to talk to and while she had some reservations about that being Kelley she honestly couldn’t think of anyone better. Kel had been there through the breakup, she knew all about everything and how the two were in the past and of course out of anyone else’s Alex really valued her opinion which is why she was so pleased when her teammate agreed to spend some of the day with her. 

-- 5 hours prior --

Alex awoke to the sound of her alarm with a groan as she squinted her eyes to find the phone and turn it off. The headache from all the celebratory drinks the night before wasted no time in giving the world cup winner a major headache. “Oh thank you, drunk Alex.” she said under her breath spying a cup of water and bottle of Motrin on the bed side table. She had put them there the night before mostly for Kelley who was a bit more on the drunk side than she was but clearly they would both be needing them today. She looked at the clock to see they had about an hour before they had to head for the airport and sighed laying back down next to her teammate who was still sleeping so soundly. It didn’t surprise Alex at all that the alarm had no affect on the sleeping beauty. She laid there for a moment admiring Kelley’s features, wanting to take in waking up to her for just a few minutes longer, and gently ran her fingers along the other’s bare shoulder. Pajamas of any kind had been much too much effort the night before and Kelley ended up sleeping in her shorts and sports bra while Alex somehow found it within herself to change into a racer back tank top and more comfortable shorts. She haphazardly drew little shapes onto her skin and then finally replaced her fingertips with her lips, kissing the back of Kel’s shoulder gently, lovingly. “Good morning, beautiful. Time to wake up. Greece awaits us.” She said in the most positive and sing-songy voice she could muster up through her hangover. She ran her hand through the older girl’s hair placing her thumb over the tender spot she hit yesterday being sure not to apply any pressure. Alex knew it would feel so much worse today and she just wished there was something she could do to take the pain away. “You okay, my little squirrelly? I have water and Motrin for you on the nightstand.” 

-- Present --

It took some moaning and groaning to get Kelley up and out to bed but with the promise of coffee and greasy food they were up and on their way to the airport. Luckily their fight wasn’t too long and the girls spent it laughing at all their other teammates stories on instagram and posts on twitter. Everyone had gotten so wild last night but it was well deserved. They had worked so hard and now it was time to just let loose and enjoy themselves. Of course Alex wished she could have spent some more time with them doing more of the celebratory rituals but Greece was waiting and if she was honest that was definitely swaying her. The thought of it with Kelley just completely sealed the deal. 

“Well then maybe we should go back to being just friends then.” Alex regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. Kelley was just being so pessimistic about all the time they’d have to spend apart due to their physical therapists and trainers being in such different states and needing to work with them almost every day to get themselves healthy and back up and running in time for the Olympics training camp. It left zero time for flights back and forth to see one another and would only cut into their time while they were together so it wouldn’t make sense to go anyway. There had been quite a few times Alex cursed her profession but never quite as hard as she did this go around. The injuries were taking everything from her and now Kelley too? 

“Kel -- I --” 

“No, you’re right. Maybe we should take a break. It’s never going to work this way.” 

She was going to tell her she didn’t mean it. That she was just stressed and frustrated and the words were just snapped out in aggression but then Kelley agreed. Alex felt her heart fall into her stomach and a lump instantly form in her throat. She wasn’t even going to try to fight for her? She knew Kelley was too prideful to beg someone to stay with her but she was hoping for at least something. Anything -- but all she got was a simple agreement. Of all the damn times for Kelley to be so compliant. 

“I have to go.” was all Alex could force out past the lump in her throat. She knew her voice was growing shaky and the last thing she wanted was for Kelley to hear her cry so she just left it at that and hung up the phone. 

Alex had never cried as hard as she did that night. She cried so hard and for so long that she ended up crying herself to sleep on the couch. She didn’t wake up early the next morning for her physical therapy appointment like she was supposed to because in that moment she just didn’t care. Nothing seemed to matter anymore. Her entire world came crashing down and there was no one to blame but herself. 

The forward typed out countless text messages over the next few days consisting of “I love you, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it. Please don’t tell me we’re really over, etc. etc.” None of them actually made it past the delete button, though. Maybe this was what Kelley had been waiting for, maybe she was looking for an out all along and that’s why she so easily let Alex go. They moved so fast and Kelley had always been so scared of commitment, she must have been so relieved at Alex’s words. That’s what she kept telling herself. Why else wouldn’t Kelley fight to keep her? 

They had short little conversations here and there throughout the next couple weeks but there was such an underlying tension that neither said more than a few words to one another each time. They really were broken up. It was Alex’s worst fear come true. 

-------------------------------------------

“What are you gonna do when you have to see her later?” A concerned Ashlyn asked Alex as they stepped out of the car together that they had taken from the airport to the hotel. Alex was just glad she was able to get a flight with Ashlyn and Ali so she wouldn’t have too much silence to have to sit and think through on the plane. 

The brunette shrugged. “I have no idea. I don’t know what to do or say.” 

“Nothing,” she heard Ali say sharply. “You don’t do anything. Let her come to you and if she doesn’t well then she’s just stupid but we’ll be here for you, you know that.” 

“Thanks, Al.” Alex forced a half smile and squeezed her friend’s hand.