#katstarry

but you do have robin.

she's been your closest friend throughout the years, having met her in freshman year in the library, where you spent your lunchtime at, and you're okay with just having one close friend. you've come to peace with that. robin has been the bestest friend you've ever had, she's became a confidant, and you never have to put up a front with her. it's easy to talk to her, she has that sort of power somehow. what usually takes you a few weeks to become comfortable with someone new, it had only been a mere few days before being totally comfortable with robin.

as you walk into the school, you walk to your locker, seeing her right beside it.

"hey robin," you smile at her as she moves out the way for you, "good morning."

she returns your smile with her shoulder to the locker beside your own, one bookbag strap hanging from the other, "goood morning!"

you grab the materials you need for the first class of the day, "what's got you so happy this early?" you yawn.

robin shrugs, "can't a woman just be happy to see her best friend?"

rolling your eyes playfully, "of course you can!" you smirk at her, closing the locker and adjusting your bag on your shoulder, "...but maybe it has to do with a certain bandmate of yours?" you whisper.

she gasps, whispering back, "what! no. definitely not, definitely did not talk to her just a few minutes ago."

you laugh as the bell rings, signaling the start of the day.

"guess i'll see you at lunch?"

she nods, "can we go to the cafeteria today instead of the library? forgot my lunch today, woke up late."

you both begin to walk to the direction of your classes, "yeah that's fine, see you there!" giving her a side hug, you both go your separate ways.

it's now your class before lunch, history.

the day has felt longer than usual. you can't wait for it to be over and have your after school nap.

dropping your bag beside your desk, you sit and take out your notebook for the class.

the other students come walking in, he sits in his usual spot behind you.

you sit up straighter, god i'm so embarrassing.

usually, you hate having to have people sit behind you. it always feels like their watching your every move. of course, it's not true, but you can't help but think it. it's why you always sit in the back. but unfortunately, those seats were taken when you had walked in the first day of this class.

it's even worse when you think the person behind you is cute.

you move your hair to your shoulders, hoping it covers the sight to your notebook. you're just shading in the margins.

you look up when the teacher gets up from his desk, class is about to start.

"alright class, let's get started."

he walks over to the door and shuts it, and begins taking attendance.

"well, for today it'll be fairly easy. you won't hear me talk much today," the class let's out sighs of relief, the jocks who get along with him laugh playfully, "alright, alright. you won't be doing that after what i tell you."

oh no. you already know what he's about to say.

"we'll be doing a project! you'll be grouped up in pairs." immediately people begin to look at one another, already knowing who they want to be paired with, you look around, you don't really talk to anyone in that class. though, nancy wheeler has been kind to you, hopefully she'd want to pair up with you. but probably not, since barb and jonathan is in this class too. you can still hope though. any of them!

"before you get excited, i'll be the one assigning groups. it'll be at random."

now, the class really does let out sounds of disappointment and dissatisfaction.

"i told you, you wouldn't like it!" he laughs and clears his throat and goes back to his desk, grabbing a piece of paper and going back to leaning on his podium.

"alright, let's see here." he goes on to list the pairings, you anxiously wait for your name to be called.

please. please, please, pair me with nancy. or barb. or jonathan.

"nancy wheeler and-" please! "barbara holland."

well, okay. that's fine, who else is left? you'd been so caught up in waiting for your name that you hadn't kept up with who was called and who hasn't. jonathan! he hasn’t been called yet. please, please, please-

"y/n l/n and-" oh shit, that's you. "eddie munson."

oh shit, he's behind you.

the girl in front of you turns around and whispers to you, "good luck."

should you turn around? if you don't what if he thinks you're upset about being paired with him? you should probably turn around, the teacher keeps listing names, and you look back briefly.

he's already looking at you and you awkwardly make eye contact; you give a small smile and turn back around. okay that wasn't so bad right? dang it. you've tried your hardest to not talk to him. but if you think someone's cute you should want to talk to them, right? wrong. you never know what to say when you like someone, how can you even like someone without talking to them? you don't know, but it happened anyway. and now you're basically being forced to talk to him.

robin's going to love this.

"okay, now that you know who your partners are, i'll talk about what this project will be about. you and your partners will come up with a topic, it'll have to be a significant part of history. you'll make a presentation where both will have to speak in front of the class. you can bring in photos, poster boards, anything to aid the presentations. it's not necessary, but it could earn you extra points!"

he looks over to the clock on the wall, "... i'll give you until the end of class, which is about," he looks down to his wristwatch to double check, "40 minutes from now, to come up with a topic, come to my desk to let me know you've come up with something before leaving class, please."

clapping his hands together, he sighs, "alright! pair up!"

everyone begins to move to be with their partners, darn it. all you have to do is turn around. it's not that big a deal. as nervous as you are to talk to eddie, your grade matters more than a silly crush.

you turn around in your seat, grabbing your notebook and putting it in your lap. finally looking up you see him tapping his pencil on his desk, also looking up. the awkward eye contact again, awkward to you at least.

okay. maybe you can fail one project.

who are you kidding, your parents would look at you crazy if you came home with a failing grade.

"hey." you finally say, giving him another shy smile. god damn it why are you so awkward.

he nods, "hey." he leans onto his elbows, looking away, "it's alright if you wanna switch partners y'know? or if you wanna work alone, or something."

you look at him in surprise, "no! it's fine. i don't mind working with you, sorry if i gave that impression." furrowing your eyebrows, dang it maybe your nervousness made him think that.

he looks back to you, "really? i wouldn't want to bring your grade down, straight A student." he smiles. okay, now he's just messing with you.

you can't help the heat that rushes to your cheeks, so he must know about you then? how does he know that?

"funny that you think i would let that happen." you laugh.

he leans back onto his chair, arms now crossed on the table. "alright then, are you sure you wanna be my partner, then?" he looks at you, eyebrows raised.

"yes, i'm sure." you now lean on his desk, arms also crossed.

"do you have any ideas for our topic?" you grab the notebook from your lap, grab a pencil, and put it in between you both on the desk.

he sits up now, leaning on the desk, mirroring your actions.

oh no, he's close now, breathe.

he scratches the back of his neck, "uh... not really."

"alright, that's fine. uhm," you look at the clock, "we have about 35? 30? minutes, so we have time. we should just pick a few things and then we can pick the one we like best, yeah?" you write in your notebook, ideas, and underline it. you look back up and find eddie looking down at your notebook before looking back up as well.

"yeah, that sounds like a good idea."

you tap your pencil and bite your lip, thinking.

"hmm... we could do like the great depression or something." you murmur and write it down.

as you have your head down to write it, you miss eddie's panicked gaze. he's never really had much care for these types of things since usually whoever he's partnered with doesn't even bother talking to him and do it all themselves, doesn't even give him the chance to contribute. he quickly tries to think so that he can add something too.

"uh, the- what about the american revolution? or something? i dunno."

you look back up, "yeah! you wanna write that?"

you offer the pencil to him, "sure." he takes it, turning the notebook towards him, feeling a bit insecure about his handwriting compared to yours that's above his own. it isn't the neatest, and he never really cared about it, but he can't help it when you look at him like that.

the rest of the time goes by like that, going back and forth with ideas, your notebook page filled with both your handwriting.

"okay, we have like 10 minutes left. do you have a favorite?"

you tilt your head as you wait for an answer.

"uh," he bites his lip as he looks down at the list, "the invention of the printing press?" to be honest he just picked a random one.

"cool! i'm alright with that." you smile as you put a small star beside the idea.

"hmm... would you want to do a poster board? or anything?"

no, honestly he would not. but he looks at you and can tell that you really would, anything that would earn extra points, right? he smiles.

"i wouldn't mind it. i could buy the stuff for it." he doesn't have the money for it, but he'll just have to sell more of his stuff for it.

"really? no that's okay, i'm the one that wanted to do it."

"nooo," he gives you a pointed look, playfully scolding you, "i'll buy it. what do we need for that?" he plays with the end of his hair twisting it in front of his face. a nervous habit of his, you make him nervous. not that you realize.

"well, the board, some markers, we could use mine since i already have some, and some glue. we could print out the stuff we need at the library, once we find out whatever we need to print."

"alrighty then. we made a lot of progress today then, huh? i'm the best partner you could have! we're really an unstoppable duo, right here." he puts his hand up for a high-five.

you give him the high-five, ignoring the tingly feeling on your hand, and it wasn't from the impact.

"oh yeah, totally." you laugh.

"i don't like that tone." he squints at you.

"what do you mean? i'm serious! we are the best duo." you smile.

"alright, i believe you." he smiles and stretches.

the bell rings, and it feels like suddenly the day went by too fast now.

you stand and grab your things, writing your names on an index card and the topic for the project.

eddie stands as well, about to say something but you beat him to it.

"let's go turn in our topic."

he usually is out the door when they do this, okay.

you both walk to the teachers desk, you smile and give him the index card.

he takes it and looks up with a smile, "great topic!" he looks over at eddie, "hopefully she rubs off on you!"

you frown and look over at eddie, who gives him a sarcastic smile and nod.

you both walk out the classroom, "do you have lunch after this?" he asks.

you stop in your tracks, about to walk to the cafeteria to meet robin.

"yeah i do, do you?"

"yup." he smiles and walks beside you, making your way to the cafeteria.

"y'know i was always scared to talk to you." he gives you a side eye, before looking straight again.

"what? of me?" you look over at him incredulously.

"oh, totally. thought you were scary, y'know being a smarty pants and all."

ah, so he's messing with you. again.

"ha ha," you roll your eyes, though you're smiling, "very funny."

"you know those candies? what're they called? smarties? yeah, that's you."

"what? it's a candy!" you laugh.

"so? that's still you."

"okay, okay. i'm not that smart alright?" you shake your head, still smiling. you can't stop smiling.

he looks at you like you're crazy. "you're kidding, right? don't you have like, the highest grade in the class?"

you shrug, feeling shy. "could be better, though."

the cafeteria is in view now, and you desperately need to change the subject. "well, guess this is where we go our separate ways." you sigh dramatically.

"i guess so." he breaks eye contact and looks around, "you could uh, sit at our table. if you want."

"oh! uh... i wouldn't want to bother-" "you wouldn't be."

you smile at him and he swears he can hear his heat beating out his chest right now.

"thank you. but i was gonna meet with my friend robin. i'll see you tomorrow in class, though."

"right, yeah, that's fine. see you tomorrow." he opens the door to the cafeteria and dramatically makes way for you to pass through.

you wave him goodbye as he makes way to his groups table, you see robin at your usual spot.

“hey!” she swats your hand away, but she’s too late, “paired up, huh? i bet you’re thrilled!” she smiles over at you.

you groan and put your face in your hands.

“it wasn’t so bad, honestly. it was pretty fun. i didn’t make a fool of myself.” your words were muffled in between your hands, “…at least i hope not.” you say, facing your friend once again.

she laughs at your distress, “oh c’mon! you should be happy that you finally have an excuse to talk to him!”

“it’s not funny, robin! how am i going to survive this? oh my god, robin.” you look at her smiling, you know that you’re being dramatic. but besides your nerves, you are pretty excited to finally be talking to eddie.

“what?” she raises her eyebrows at you, eating her fries.

“he’s so dreamy.”

robin gags, “gross.”

you nudge her shoulder laughing, “oh please! maybe you’re right. i should just be happy about this. he was pretty nice.” you look at her and sigh dramatically, “it was pretty nice.”

“you’re hopeless.”

“you’re supposed to be hyping me up right now! i finally talked to my crush.”

“yeah, and i still can’t believe it only took you being partners for it to happen. by force.” she laughs when you pout.

“okay, okay! yes, of course i’ll hype you up. he’ll totally ask you out, though. i bet he’s thinking of you right now, planning how to do it. actually, he’s planning your marriage as we speak.”

“okay. let’s not get too crazy now.” you laugh, moving to stand to finally get in line for some food, but blushing at the thought nonetheless.

robin rolls your eyes at you, “you are too far gone.”

you steal one last fry from her before leaving, hearing a faint “oh c’mon!” behind you.

standing in line, you see the same girl from your history class in front of you, elizabeth? you think her name is?

she turns around, “oh, hey!”

“hey, elizabeth, right?”

“yes! you’re y/n? right?”

you smile, “yeah, we have history together.”

“right! i hope this project is over with quickly, i got stuck with byers,” she glanced at a table, “but it can’t be as bad as munson.”

you were taken aback, you knew what other people thought of him, but being outright rude is crazy.

“oh! eddie’s a great partner, honestly… we spent the class coming up with ideas. jonathan’s really nice too, i’ve helped him take some photos before for the yearbook.”

she raises an eyebrow at you, “hm. hopefully he won’t bring your grade down.”

you feel uneasy now, what’s her problem? do these people even give eddie a chance and actually talk to him?

“i doubt it, he seemed pretty excited.”

she laughs, “that’s because a girl is finally giving him some attention.”

“no, it’s because we’re working on a project together. and i dunno, i don’t talk trash about him?” you state, plainly, giving her an unamused look, not interested in continuing the conversation.

“wow, didn’t know you could even talk that much. that’s the most i’ve ever heard you speak!” she tilts her head at you mockingly, clearly you’ve upset her.

you don’t answer her, “could you move up? the lines moving.” avoiding her taunting gaze.

you see her roll her eyes from your peripheral, and she finally turns back around.

letting out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding in, you finally make it to the food. mood ruined. why are people so mean. you’re starving. at least they’re serving your favorite today, chicken nuggets and fries. such an amazing meal, the best school food gets.

walking back to robin you catch a glimpse of eddie, he’s making another dramatic display. you don’t catch what he’s saying, since he stops his rant as you’re about to walk by, where he happens to be walking.

he bows dramatically, giving you room to walk around him, “my apologies, madame.” he smiles at you.

you shake your head laughing, “thank you, sir.”

you sit beside robin once again.

“finally! you’re back. it’s been too long! we’re finally reunited.” robin gives you a dramatic side hug.

“i know, sorry! i was held up by a troll. asked me to solve a riddle, couldn’t figure it out.”

she laughs, “oh yeah? how’d you make your away around it?”

“i ate it.” you deadpan, opening your pack of ketchup.

you finally turn to look over at her, both of you burst out laughing.

as you eat, you explain to robin your conversation with elizabeth.

“what an asshole.” she says as you both stand to throw away your trash and put away your trays.

“i know right!” you shake your head, putting your tray away.

“i just don’t understand why it bothers people so much if people don’t talk. like, hello! maybe they just don’t want to talk to you?” she says, “or- or, like why it bothers people so much that people are different from them, in general? the times i’ve occasionally spoken with eddie, he seemed pretty chill.” she raises her hands in exasperation.

“right? i don’t get it either.” you sigh.

walking out the cafeteria you join robin by her locker, before going to your own, where she accompanies you as well, and grab what you need.

“see you at dismissal?” you say.

“yup! i don’t have practice today, steve’s gonna pick me up. i got a shift after school today.” she gives you a fist bump before going on her way to class.

it’s finally the end of the day.

you can finally take that nap.

you make your way to your locker, leaving your books.

by the door on your way out you see robin, “we’re free!” she exclaims.

she wraps her arms around your shoulders, “let’s get outta here.” you say.

“what do you plan to do? while i’m away at family video, locked inside there, along with an annoying dingus, with no other choice but to do work?” she lets out an exasperated breath, looking over to you.

“i was planning on taking a nap.”

“fun!” she says, with fake enthusiasm. “was kinda hoping for a, ‘i’ll come by and see you, of course! you’re my bestest friend! i won’t let you suffer alone!’ but i see now how much you truly care about me.”

you laugh, “i’ll come by to see you, robs.” making your way to your car, steve isn’t here yet, so robin walks with you.

“really?” she says hopefully.

“yeah, after i take my nap.” you say, looking straight ahead.

“oh c’mon! your naps always last, like, forever!” she whines.

“it won’t be that long this time!” you look at her, and she looks at you.

“okay maybe it will be.”

she shakes her head as you reach your car, leaning onto it.

“you and your fucked sleep schedule.”

“it’s me and my crap sleep schedule against the world.”

“hey, i thought it was you and me against the world!”

you were too busy bantering with robin that you didn’t realize eddie walking up behind you.

he was looking for you in the hallways, even stopped by your locker. he was working up his courage all throughout lunchtime, and his last classes.

“y/n! wait!” he calls out your name, jogging to reach you.

you stop what you were about to say, staring at robin.

seeing her light up, a smirk appearing on her face.

turning your head, you’re met with eddie, hands on his knees, catching his breath.

“eddie?”

“yeah, hey. it’s me. givemeasec.” he breathes out, before standing upright again.

“hello.” he turns to robin, “and hello.” he nods his head to her.

“hey.” she looks behind him and looks back at you, “oh would you look at that? my rides here! i’ll call you later y/n! bye!” she leaves before you can even respond. you look at the direction she ran, steve’s not even here yet.

eddie turns back to face you, also looking confused by robin’s sudden disappearance.

“s’that usually happen?” he has an amused look on his face.

you shake your head, “no.”

“ah well- uh anyway. i wanna ask you something.”

oh? okay. cool. he wants to ask you something.

“yeah?”

“yeah.” he looks at you.

“okay.. you can ask me anything, eddie.”

“right! shit, uh. i was wondering, are you doing anything? later?” he sees your panicked look, he backtracks, “i mean to, y’know, work on the project.” nice save.

ah. you hide your disappointment, “oh, yeah sure. i’m not doing anything today.” oh robin’s gonna be pissed that you canceled your nap for this and not see her at work.

“okay, cool. uhh where do you wanna meet? i mean, we could go to my place? or if not that’s cool too we could go to the library or something. dunno.” he kicks a loose pebble in the parking lot, messing with his rings. cute.

“your place is fine. i could just follow right behind you,” you jiggle your keys in-front of you, “i gotta call my mom first though, let her know.” you flush, “uh, where is your place?” you ask, knowing your mom would want to know.

“it’s uh the forest hills trailer park.” he continues to fiddle with his rings, looking at you now.

“right, i know where that is. let me just ring her real quick, yeah? i’ll be right back!” you head towards the telephones outside the school, call your mom and assure her it’s just for a project and that you won’t take that long.

you head back to your car, seeing eddie still standing nearby.

“all good?” he says, smiling.

“yeah, let’s go.” you smile back.

on your drive there you realize what exactly you’re doing.

your going to eddie’s place.

you’re freaking out.

it’s okay, that’s cool. it’s just for the project. you have your notebook in your book bag still. you have your notes.

entering the trailer park and parking beside his van, you mentally prepare yourself. oh god, you’re going into his home.

breathe! you still can’t even believe your mom let you come over in the first place, to a boys place.

seeing eddie get out his van, you get out your car with your bag and stand awkwardly as you wait for him.

“this way, madame.” he says, walking ahead of you and up to the trailer. grabbing his keys from his pocket, he opens the door and lets you in first.

“welcome to my paradise.” he walks in after you, shutting the door behind him.

you look around the small living room. it’s cozy, comfortable, it feels homey. you gently place your bag on the couch.

“it’s a nice place eddie.”

he laughs and turns away, heading to the kitchen.

“you don’t have to lie.”

“i’m not lying.” you say, genuinely. “i used to live in a trailer too.”

he looks up, grabbing two cups. “really?”

you nod, “best years of my life, honestly. we moved to our current house when i was about,” you look up in thought, “7? 8? maybe?” you head over to where eddie stood.

he hums in acknowledgment. “didn’t know that.”

you shrug, “never really talked about it, not a big deal really.”

looking at you, he asks “would you like some water? soda? you can take a seat y’know.” he smiles over at you as he heads to the fridge.

taking a seat at one of the chairs at the table you answer, “hmm, what soda do you have?”

“uhh.. let me see.” he moves things around, “got some pepsi, sprite, coke..”

“i’ll take some coke, please.”

“comin’ right up, sweetheart.”

your brain nearly explodes.

oh you’re definitely calling robin after this.

he comes back to you with two cans of coke for the both of you.

“thank you. what a wonderful host.” you smile at him as he pulls out the chair beside yours and sits in it.

“you’re welcome.” he laughs.

“right.. so..” you open your can, “the project?”

a brief look of confusion crosses eddie’s face. right. the project.

he clears his throat, “yeah, the project. um, i’ll be getting the stuff tomorrow.” he stepped out during lunch for a bit to sell and earn some more cash, thankfully he got enough for the materials for the poster board, they’re pretty affordable anyway.

“alright, cool! thank you for that, by the way. i wouldn’t of had minded buying it.”

he shakes his head, drinking from his can. “no, no. it’s fine. i don’t mind.”

you’re about to say something when he gives you a look, “fine.” you huff in defeat.

“good.” he smiles, knowing he won.

“let me grab my notebook from my bag.” you get up and grab your book bag from the couch, unzipping it and looking for your notebook.

huh.

you look through it again, pulling out the ones you do have, double checking.

you can’t believe it. you literally have all your notebooks, except your history one. you sigh frustratedly, zipping your bag back up and heading back towards the kitchen, empty handed.

“couldn’t find it?”

“couldn’t find it.” you continue to stand, “sorry.”

“nah, it’s fine. uh.” he looks at his watch, “hasn’t been that long, if you, maybe wanna stay for a bit longer?” he taps on his can, please say yes.

you keep your excitement at bay, trying to remain cool.

“yeah, that’d be cool.” nice. super cool.

“cool.”

you sit back down, “so..” you smile, looking down at your can of coke.

“soo….” he mimicks.

“i wanted to let you know, about me calling my mom, it isn’t because i don’t trust you, i swear. she just likes knowing where i am, she worries.” you look at him.

“it’s all good. don’t worry ‘bout it.” though he does look as though he feels more comfortable now, “you get used to it.”

“you shouldn’t have to.”

he shrugs, changing the subject, “nice that your mom’s protective of you though.”

you laugh, “not as much as my dad though.”

“really? what’s he like?” he tilts his head at you, asking in genuine curiosity.

“well.. i’m the only girl. so you could imagine how protective he can be. he’s not like, controlling, but he’s just a bit strict. curfews and stuff like that.”

“hmm. you have siblings, then? brothers?”

“yeah,” you smile, “three actually. 2 older brothers and one younger. my older brothers moved out already though, but they visit frequently.. do you have any?”

“me? nah, no, i don’t. only son.”

you nod your head.

“live here with my uncle wayne, actually.” he moves his gaze back down to the table, “he works at the factory most days, ‘s why he’s not here right now.”

“oh cool, my dad used to work there too.”

“what’s he work in now?”

“construction. he’s out of the city on the weekdays, comes home on weekends. though sometimes he doesn’t come for a few weeks if the job is too far away.”

this is the most you’ve told someone about yourself, other than robin, in just a day.

you’re really going crazy.

“that’s cool-” he tries to find a way to lighten the mood after seeing your expression, but accidentally lets out a loud burp.

you laugh and he smiles.

“‘scuse me.” he laughs, covering his mouth.

“i lived with my brothers, trust me, you’re all good.” still laughing.

“what’s your uncle like?”

he goes on to talk about his uncle wayne, the conversation goes smoothly. you feel at ease with eddie’s jokes and banter, it’s an automatic click. a rare thing for you to come by, you hope this is the first of many hangouts. you realize that your closest friends are the complete opposite of you—robin, who can somehow make a conversation not boring, always including you with her other friends and makes you be apart of the conversation. it’s the same with eddie, how do they do it? it must be a superpower, or something.

you finish laughing after a story he had been telling you involving his friends from hellfire when you speak up, “could you tell me the time?”

he looks down at his watch, “uhh, it’s about to be 7 o’clock,” looking at you through his bangs, “tryna ditch me, sweetheart?”

dramatically grabbing at his chest, he says “i’m wounded.” and nearly falls out his chair.

“definitely. yeah, i can’t wait to get outta here.” you reply sarcastically, “i do have to go though.” you sigh.

“i had a lot of fun.”

he crosses his arms and smiles. “as did i.”

you get up from the chair, eddie does too and walks to the couch, grabbing your bag and handing it to you once you reach him. “thanks.”

he opens the door for you and walks you to your car, “we should uh, do this again sometime. hangout..” he scratches his neck, looking around before looking at you once again.

“i’d love to!” you twirl your keys in your hand.

“cool! can’t wait.” he clears his throat. “see you tomorrow? at school?”

“see you, eddie.” you smile over at him when you open your car door, getting in and closing it.

you can’t stop smiling on your drive home, you just hung out with your crush. you’re friends with your crush now.

right as you get home and talk to your mom, you immediately call robin spending another few hours talking to her.

many days spent seeing each other, the thought of continuing to keep conversations going after you both go your separate ways, has been something you’ve wanted to do since the start.

it’s a simple thing really, but for some reason you don’t find the perfect time to ask for his number, or bring it up. feeling as though that would be too awkward. he hasn’t brought it up either, which only fuels your reluctance.

which brings you to now.

it’s a friday and you’re both spending the evening at a local diner, waiting for your food to arrive, well, specifically eddie's.

"are you sure that you don't want anything else?" he looks at you as he drinks from his cup, he had ordered a burger along with some fries. while you had only gotten a vanilla milkshake with fries.

"yup, i ate some lunch at school earlier. remember?"

he nods his head, "right. just don't steal my food when it gets here." narrowing his eyes at you.

"pfft, what? i would never do that." you say, grabbing one of your fries and taking a bite.

eddie rolls his eyes and smiles, "uh huh, just like you didn't steal my chicken nugget during lunch, or yesterday at the movies and i got some m&m's , or the other time when you said you didn't want anything but then asked for my chi-"

"alriiight! okay! i have no idea what you're talking about. that wasn't me." hiding your smile by taking a sip from your milkshake, he leans onto the table crossing his arms in front of him. "sure it wasn't, she looked a lot like you though. weird."

he steals one of your fries.

"hey! now who's the thief?" smacking his hand away, but you were too late, he had already grabbed it and ate it, smiling innocently back at you.

he shrugs, "don't know what you're talking about."

"i hate you." you say shaking your head and laughing.

he laughs, "oh please, you love me, sweetheart."

you blush. because first of all yes, you do, and second of all because of the nickname he's gotten used to calling you.

"you wish." you roll your eyes, acting as if his words didn't cause your heart to race and cheeks to burn. you hope he doesn't notice. but of course, he does, though he doesn't bring it up.

"i'm wounded, you don't love me." he puts his face in his hands as if he's crying. that's when the waitress comes over with his food.

"okay, here's your burger and your fries, sir," she smiles and puts the food down in front of him, causing eddie to look up and rub his hands together at the sight of food, "enjoy your meal! you both make a lovely couple." she smiles as she looks at you both.

you both freeze and look at each other, you see eddie smile. oh no.

"thank you so much, she doesn't love me." he deadpans with a fake sad smile as he looks at her.

an awkward look appears on her face. "oh! i'm, uh, sorry about that." she looks over at you.

"that's- no! i never said that, he's just kidding. ha ha." you look at eddie who's trying not to laugh at the look on your face. you kick him under the table.

he yelps and the waitress leaves after awkwardly laughing.

"uh, ouch?!" he rubs his leg under the table.

"oh c'mon it wasn't that hard!" you laugh. your face feels warm once again, "what'd you have to say that for? the poor lady, she was just doing her job." you shake your head with a fake disappointed sigh.

"just having some fun, sweety pie."

"ugh, don't ever say that again."

"we gotta keep up the act now! right, sweetums?" he bats his eyelashes at you and takes a bite of his burger.

"stop!" you laugh.

"why, sweetcheeks? apple of my eye? buttercheeks?"

"buttercheeks?" you ask, still laughing.

"i don't know where that came from, kinda started pulling some outta my ass." he laughs, taking another bite.

"it's okay, honey, you're trying your best." deciding to play along, patting his free hand that lays atop the table.

though, unbeknownst to you, his brain kind of short circuited for a moment once he heard you. you called him honey and you don't even realize the effect you have on him. usually, he's the one calling you pet names, loving the way you react to them, it's sweet. though he only thinks it's because you're a naturally shy person, but he's questioned in his mind if there was another reason as to why.

and he hopes he's the reason why you get all flustered when he says them.

taking another bite to keep himself occupied, nearly finished with the burger, he smiles at you once he finishes.

"i really am, you cutie patootie." he wipes his hands on a napkin before, leaning over and booping you on the nose.

"seriously? cute patootie? out of all the options?" you finish your milkshake, putting the rest of your fries to the middle of the table in between eddie and you so you can share.

"it suits you! but all right then, uh.." he looks up in thought, eating one of your fries, "...snookums."

"i really do hate you." you take the final fry.

"hey, we're supposed to be keeping up an act here, boo boo bear." he points an accusatory finger at you, you stare at each other for a moment before you both end up bursting out laughing.

"we should head home, love bug." you say, getting out your wallet.

"uh uh uh! no. i'll pay." he stops you.

"eddie you paid last time. i'll pay."

he sighs, knowing he won't be able to stop you. he hasn't been able to stop you all the other times before.

you smile, knowing that you won.

now you're both in his van and he's driving you home.

it's become a routine for you both, he started picking you up for school and driving you home. if he kept this up you'll end up not remembering how to drive.

he turns up the radio, one of his metallica cassettes is playing. looking over at him, you smile at the sight. he's looking straight ahead, hands drumming on the steering wheel to the music, head moving to the beat. you believe he does it subconsciously, as if he doesn't realize he's doing it unless someone points it out.

you look away once he glances at you.

"staring it rude, sweetheart." he says sternly, though you can hear his smile.

"wasn't staring."

"sure you weren't."

"just was admiring the view."

"you flatter me, y/n." he twirls one of the strands of his hair playfully with his free hand, while the other is on the wheel with his elbow resting on the window that's down.

you shove him gently, "don't let it get to your head. it's big enough as it is."

he laughs, "who knew you'd be so mean, what happened to the shy girl from a few months ago?"

"i wasn't that shy."

he looks over at you with his eyebrows raised.

"okay maybe i was."

he laughs, "couldn't even keep eye contact with me."

"i was just nervous!"

"i make you nervous, sweetheart?"

"no."

"sure." he smiles.

the rest of the drive was comfortable, music playing in the background, you like that about being with eddie. it doesn't feel awkward having periods of silence, he makes you feel safe, welcome, you can just be you.

he lowers the volume of the radio once he stops in front of your house, putting the van on park.

"well, home sweet home." he says, turning to look at you.

"home sweet home." you repeat, unbuckling your seatbelt. "thanks for the ride, eds."

"of course. you know i don't mind." he smiles.

you smile at him and get out, waving back at him once your in your house as he waits for you to get in safely, and shut the door.

once you're safely inside, eddie glances down at where you were sat, and finds napkin with scribbles on it.

he grabs it and looks at it properly, about to throw it to the back to throw away later (he always forgets), but stops once he reads what's on it.

it's a telephone number, it's your number. and beside it is written 'call me!' with a smiley face and a messy heart.

you had called robin as soon as you got home, gushing once again about your time with eddie, while she talked to you about her encounters with vickie.

and now here you were a few hours later, anxiously laying on your bed and flipping through magazines, waiting for eddie's call. will he even call?

did he even see the napkin? oh no, what if he threw it away? or what if he doesn't care?

that's when a ring begins to sound.

you jump up from the bed, fixing your hair, but then realizing he won't even be able to see you.

you pick up the phone, "hello?"

"well hellooo, y/n. i can't believe this is our first time calling each other."

you immediatley begin to smile, "i know right! we're so stupid."

"i didn't know how to bring it up."

"neither did i."

you both laugh.

"we really are so stupid." he says.

you picture him by the phone, is he standing? or is he sitting? is he smiling as much as you are?

"so..."

"so... what'd you do today?" he asks, and you know now that he's definitely smiling, and you can picture it so easily. maybe he's even toying with the phone cord, maybe not.

"hm... well i went to school obviously," "obviously." he interrupts, sounding as if he's holding back laughter.

"okay. and then just hung out with this guy after school."

"aah.. a guy you say? should i be worried?"

IS HE FLIRTING? you swear your heart skips a beat. breathe!

you laugh, "oh no, no. nothing to worry about."

"you sure?"

"totally, he wouldn't even hurt a fly."

"sounds like a pussy." he laughs.

"definitely."

"heeey! you weren't supposed to agree." he pouts, though you can't see him.

"you're the one who said it!"

"well, i don't know the guy, so i can say it."

"eddie you literally are the guy."

"i am?"

"idiot."

your laughs quiet down and you hear quiet breaths over the receiver, something about it makes it feel so intimate, it makes you blush. it's like he's so close, but he's so far away. only a couple of minute's drive away, but still, too far for your liking.

"still awake over there?" you whisper.

you hear a loud exaggerated snore in return, causing you to pull the phone away for a moment.

"well you must be in very deep slumber, i guess i'll hang up.."

"no! i'm awake. sorry, must've fallen asleep a bit there. oops. my bad, i'm up. don't hang up."

"nearly ruptured my eardrum." you laugh.

"myyy bad." he snickers.

"i am getting a bit tired though," a yawn escapes you in the middle of your sentence.

you hear him sigh, "guess we gotta sleep then."

"guess so."

a moment of quiet.

"you doing anything tomorrow?" he asks.

"um, no i don't think so. you?"

"nope."

"cool." you smile, knowing he'll ask to hang out.

"can i ask you something?" he sounds nervous.

"of course."

"we should hang out tomorrow."

"...okay, i'm down. was that the question?" you laugh softly, opting to lay down on your bed again.

"sorry- no that's not the question," you hear him move around, "uh, i was thinking."

"oh no." "shut up," he laughs, "i was uh, wondering, if you- do you want to go on a date with me?"

quiet.

WHAT. oh. oh this is real.

"uh it's okay if not, can just forget i ever said that-" "i'd love to."

he swears he stops breathing for a moment, "yeah?" he smiles once he hears your answer.

"yeah." you giggle.

"cool.. nice. i'll pick you up, uh is like 3pm cool?" "yeah, that's cool."

"awesome. well... i'll see you tomorrow, sweetheart." he whispers.

"see you tomorrow eds. goodnight."

"don't let the bed bugs bite." he says, did he really just say that? he rubs his face, but he feels calmer once he hears it made you laugh.

"alright, bye eddie."

he can't wait for tomorrow.

excitedly going to sleep, the next day comes quick.

calling robin and immediately telling her you have a date with eddie.

you wake up, have some breakfast and tell your mom, take a shower, and spend time looking for an outfit.

he didn’t tell you what the plans were, so you decide on something a bit casual but also a bit dressy. you put on a nice babydoll shirt and some jeans along with your docs.

sitting at your desk, where you have a small mirror and your make-up products, you get started on getting ready. you take your time getting your hair to look nice and not going too over the top with the make-up just some simple concealer, mascara, and lip gloss.

by the time you finish it’s about 2:30pm. okay, 30 minutes left. cool. now it’s really sinking in that you’re about to go on a date.

you get up and put on some jewelry, some earrings and a necklace, and just a few bracelets.

okay, now you’re ready.

wait! some perfume too. can’t forget that.

looking at the mirror you fix a few things—and you hear a knock at the door.

your mom went out to do some groceries—so you rush to the door and take a breath, not wanting to seem too eager. but you are.

you open the door and see eddie, he looks good. really good, which you’ve always thought but you can see he put effort in for this. his hair seems softer somehow? he’s wearing a black button down that fits loosely and some jeans, he’s still wearing his rings, you take notice that one his arms is hidden behind his back.

“you look great.” you both say at the same time.

“uh thanks.” you feel your face heat. “you look nice.”

“thank you, swetheart.” he pulls his arm from behind his back and he gives you flowers. you almost sigh dreamily, almost. you take it, unable to stop the smile that comes to your face.

“you remembered my favorite flowers?” you say as you look down at them.

“i remember everything you tell me, beautiful.”

his pet names aren’t new, but knowing this is a date makes hearing them a lot more difficult to not love the way it sounds.

“thank you, eds. i’ll just go put them in some water and i’ll be right out.” he nods and waits for you.

you’re out really quickly, excited.

he opens the door for you as he always does, but this time he even buckled the seatbelt for you, before going to the drivers seat. gentleman.

“so, where are you taking us today eddie?” you look over at him seeing him smile and starting the van.

“guess you’ll have to wait to find out.”

he hums along to the music that’s playing, opting to turn on the radio and put on one of his favorite stations. you hum along to the songs you do know, the ones you’ve listened together with him and some you’re just now hearing.

the trees on the side of the road pass you by, shades of green and brown since it’s almost fall, but still warm enough to be outside.

“i think i know where we’re headed.” you say, your gaze still outside the window.

“sh! sh! i still want it to be a surprise. even if you know where we’re going.” he chuckles.

you smile lazily over at him, your head resting on the headrest. “alright.”

the drive to the location is peaceful, as it always is. it’s filled with silly banter, teasing, and causal conversation.

once he parks the van, he rushes out and opens your door before you even get the chance to reach for the handle.

you hop out, “thank you.” you pat his chest.

“of course, your majesty.” he puts out his hand and your grab it.

he leads you to the back of the van and he opens it with his free hand, grabbing a blanket and a basket.

“a picnic?”

“a picnic.” he blushes and looks away, feeling a bit flustered by the way you look at him in adoration.

he leads you a bit further into the trees until you reach a good place; with a beautiful view of lovers lake.

letting go of your hand with a soft squeeze, he opens up the blanket and places it on the ground, putting the basket on it and sitting down. he look up at you and reaches for your hand.

“you gonna join me? or are you just gonna stand there and look pretty? i wouldn’t mind either one.”

you sit down across from him. “oh shut up.” you mumble.

he nudges your foot with his own, “don’t get shy on me now, sweetheart. let’s dig in.”

“alright, let’s see what you brought.”

opening up the basket he pulls out sandwiches, drinks, a container with cupcakes, and some fruit.

he looks up at you once he finished laying everything out. “i know it’s not much.. but i hope you enjoy it. i know you’ve mentioned before how badly you wanted to go on a picnic before.” he looks back down and counties setting everything.

you grab his hand and squeeze it. “it’s perfect, eddie. thank you. anything we would’ve done today i would enjoy regardless, you make things fun ed’s.”

letting go of his hand, he sits up and smiles.

“likewise, cutie patootie.”

“ooookay. well then, this has been fun—” you move to stand.

“no! alright, alright. i’ll behave.” he laughs, putting his hands on your shoulders.

“thanks, buttercheeks.” this causes you both laugh.

he hands you a sandwich, you take it and eat. the time is spent eating the snacks he had brought, goofing around, and shy glances when the other thought they weren’t looking.

the food was eaten and now you were snacking on some grapes, now sitting side by side, looking out at the lake, the sunset making the trees surrounding it to have more color and the water to glimmer.

“it’s so beautiful.” you say, looking at the scenery.

“yeah. it is.” he says softly, but he’s looking at you. he’s leaning on his elbows, his legs stretched out and crossed.

looking over at him, you lock eyes. only this time neither of you look away. you move to mirror his position, now at eye level.

“hey.” he says in a low voice.

“hey.” you say.

you eat another grape.

“can i have one?” he glances down at the fruit in the container.

“if you can catch it.” you smirk, sitting up as he remains how he is. he furrows his eyebrows in confusion, but understands once he sees you raises your arm, about to throw the grape.

he opens his mouth in attempt to catch it, but it hits his eye, causing you to burst out laughing.

“laughing at my pain, i see how it is.” he picks up the grape that fell onto the blanket and throws it back at you, which hits your shoulder.

“you missed.”

“you hit my eye!”

“it was close!”

“that was not close.”

you throw another one, catching him off guard. it hits his nose.

“now that was close.” you say, eating one yourself.

he shakes his head and sits up, reaching for the container. you pull it away playfully.

“oh? is that what we’re doing now?” he says.

you shrug.

he moves to grab it again, you pull it away.

neither of you move, until you stand and run with the container. he gets up and tries to reach you, but unfortunately you trip on a tree root and fall onto the grass, eddie falls as well by trying to reach for you.

he falls atop you, the container of fruit now forgotten.

“y’know if you wanted to be on top of me, i think that could’ve been after a couple more dates, eddie.” you joke.

eddie leans over you, not wanting to put his full weight on you. “ha ha.” he rolls his eyes.

“so what i’m hearing is.. you’ll go on more dates with me?” he brushes a loose strand of hair that fell in front of your face.

“mmm… maybe.” you smile.

“cool.”

“cool.”

he glances down at your lips, looking back to find you doing the same. “can i kiss you, sweetheart?” he whispers.

you nod, and that’s all he needs before leaning down to connect your lips. he feels your soft lips and he can’t help but sigh against the kiss. this is real. he’s kissing you. moving your hands to wrap around his neck, you feel his lips love against yours, tasting the cupcakes from earlier and a hint of mint. smiling against his lips, he pulls back for breath.

smiling down at you, he looks at you, a gleeful look on your face.

he moves to move off you, but you pull him back down for one last kiss.

he laughs against your kiss, helping you up.

“can’t get enough of me already?”

you shove his shoulder gently, “what, don’t want me to kiss you then?”

“now, now let’s not get crazy. i didn’t say that.” he pulls you closer, both of you now standing. he leans down and pecks your lips, pulling away and humming contently.

“nice?” you say.

“more than nice. amazing. awesome. beautiful. spectacular. though i think i know what would make it even better.”

“yeah? and what’s that?” you play with the ends of his hair.

“if you would be my girlfriend.” he says, blushing.

you hide your smile by hiding your face in his neck.

“i’d love to be your girlfriend, eddie.” you kiss his cheek.

he embraces you. “thank you.”

“for what?” you laugh, feeling him shrug.

“being you.” he kissed the top of your head, “…i’m your boyfriend now.” he smiles, pulling away and holding your hand.

and that next monday, in history class, where it all first started, he looks at his grade, an A written at the top.

he smiles as he lingers behind, answering when he needed to. having previously too busy with tours and recordings, he didn’t have a proper chance to attend a ceremony like this with his current girlfriend. it’s been nearly a year since they’ve both been official, and he thinks that she might be the one.

as they both take their seats where the event will take place, he takes everything in.

looking around himself, he takes a deep breath, allowing his mind to wander.

he really made it.

thinking back, it’s been nearly 6 years since he left his hometown of hawkins, indiana to move to the chaos of california.

he wonders how everyone is, his old friends, what the small town is like now. what do they think of him now?

he wonders how you are. he’s heard your name before, in newspapers, in magazines. so he has an inkling that you’re doing amazing, doing everything you’ve ever dreamed of. could you even be here, tonight? he didn’t even know who else was nominated besides his girlfriend.

he looks around the dimly lit room, for a sign, a possibility, just out of curiosity. but he sees no familiar faces of his past.

you’re running late, which has rarely ever happened. you just so happened to have a wardrobe malfunction, a strap of your dress having snapped. luckily, your team fixed it right up, but it pushed the schedule behind.

which brought you to your current dilemma, being stuck in traffic.

robin, who you’ve brought as your plus one, sits by your side.

“oh god, we’re gonna be so late! we’re gonna walk in there while the ceremony has already begun and everyone’s going to know that we’re late! hopefully we don’t walk in when someone’s giving their speech-“

“robin!” you interject her rambling, smiling in amusement, “it’s going to be okay! i’m nervous too, i absolutely hate being late. but we won’t be that late! we’ll most likely get there just as it’s starting.”

she lets out a dramatic sigh as she leans her head back onto the headrest, before sitting up straight, not wanting to mess up her appearance.

“okay, okay. you’re right. it’s gonna be okay.”

you both enjoy the ride as music plays and waste the time talking, then before you know it, you arrive.

getting out the car with robin right behind you, camera’s flash. a sign that you’re in fact, not that late. you smile and walk to the carpet, a routine you’re now used to, but never get tired of. it’s a reminder, that this is what you’ve worked so hard for.

pictures are taken, you pull robin with you for them, she was standing by wanting for you to have your ‘moment’.

both walking off the carpet and semi-speed walking to your seats, you both have big smiles on your faces. the room is dimly lit as you’re both led to your assigned seats for the night, usually you say hello to the other guests, but the night took a turn of events, and you had no time.

it was a big night, the biggest so far for your career as an actress. you were nominated, for one of the biggest awards that night, best leading actress. you were beyond ecstatic from the moment you got the news.

it was a moment of realization, a moment of pure joy.

you met eddie in summer of 1985, after you graduated. you worked at star court mall in a small video store in order to save up money for college.

he had walked in, looking for a star wars movie. which led to a long conversation about star wars.

and the rest was history.

the friendship blossomed into shy glances and flirty comments until eventually, eddie had gotten the courage (after encouragement from his friend and uncle), to ask you out on a proper date. friends to now lovers, you were both inseparable. you helped him with graduating the following year, even attended his graduation. you were his biggest cheerleader.

he’d remember you as long as he lived. you, his first true love. his first example of an unconditional and healthy romantic love.

he’ll never forget your support, the way you encouraged him to keep going to his gigs at the hideout when he would feel like there would be no chance, you sitting at the bar, smiling up at him as he sang and played his guitar. it have him hope, he gained his confidence.

for you, the feeling was mutual. eddie, who would attend every one of your shows, no matter how big or small your role was.

the relationship had lasted four years, the year was now 1989.

1989, the year that eddie was offered his dream.

the hideout had began to gain more clients and corroded coffin began to gain more fans, steadily, they were making progress.

one night had changed everything. the band was approached by a man who claimed to be a part of a record label and had taken an interest in them and gave them his information for when they had made up that night, you were there right beside them.

as the man walked away and out the building, the band erupted into pure happiness, shouts of joy, hugs, faces of shock and in awe.

eddie turned to you, a big grin adorned his face as he embraced you and picked you up, wrapping your arms around his neck, he gave you both a twirl.

“oh my god! eddie! this is amazing!?” you smiled up at him as he placed you back on your feet, his arms still wrapped around your waist, yours now placed onto his shoudlers.

“i still can’t believe that was real, that was real right? that just happened?” he couldn’t contain his joy, “i mean i must be dreaming. there’s an angel looking at me right now.”

you blush, “oh shut up,” you lean up and give him a kiss, “you’re going to say yes, right?”

he looks at his friends over his shoulder, who heard you and look over in anticipation.

eddie looks back at you, “hell yeah we are!”

from the moment the band agreed upon the proposal made to them, the changes came quick.

the label wanted demos for songs that they’ve played at the hideout, which led to them having to travel.

“california?”

“yeah, it’s a long way from here.”

you sit with your legs crossed and pulled up onto the couch and look at eddie, who’s sitting beside you. you’re at his trailer that he shares with his uncle wayne.

he looks at you with anticipation and bites his lips, “do you think i should go?”

“me? eddie, this is entirely up to you. but if you want my opinion, i think that you should definitely go. this is an opportunity of a lifetime! it’s your dream.” you smile at him as you grab his hands, softly squeezing.

he smiles at you, “i jus’ don’t want to be so far from you. i’ve never even been far from home, really. it’s all too fast.”

tears well up in his eyes, causing your own to do the same.

“hey.. i’m always gonna be rooting for you, baby. who knows where this’ll take us? it’s a big change, sure. but we’ll be okay. don’t let me or anyone else stop you from doing this.”

you’re both crying now, it feels different.

“i wish you could come with me.”

you place yourself onto his lap, embracing him as he wraps his arms around your waist. resting your forehead onto his own, tears streaming down both your faces.

“i wish i could too, but i’ll be too busy with college.”

you’d decided to finally attend college, having saved up enough money to afford it. you wanted to continue studying acting, get better at it.

“and when i’m done with that, we can be the iconic couple.”

you both let out teary laughs, “we’ll be okay.”

the ceremony continued on, and finally, the moment comes.

the anticipation of waiting. the nominees for best leading actress being named and some jokes being made, it was exhilarating. beside you, robin takes a hold of your hand, both filled with nervousness.

the feeling was indescribable, the moment that your name was called.

it felt as if you were walking on air, the room was filled with applause, just as it had been throughout the night. but this time it was for you.

you won!

you stood and robin hugged you tightly, you didn’t know how to react as you hugged her back. walking to the stage was the craziest thing you’ve ever done, people shook your hand, congratulating you. some were people you looked up to, people you admired.

going up the steps, you greet the people on stage and accept your award. looking out into the crowd, you meet robin’s gaze, whose already smiling right back at you with tears in her eyes.

feeling your own fill with tears, you walk to the microphone to give your speech.

you open your mouth, and words momentarily fail you.

“wow.” you laugh, “this- this is something that i truly never would’ve thought i would receive. and to be here,” you look at the award in your hands and back up to the crowd, “with you all, is so crazy!”

“i want to thank everybody who has helped me make this dream come true.” you take a small moment to gain your composure, that moment, was when you saw him.

“wow.” you couldn’t believe he was there. the room laughs, thinking your reaction was from the award, not from seeing your past lover.

“i want to congratulate the other nominees, who i admire and am in awe of all that you do. and i want to thank my team, my friends, my family, my fans!”

you look over at eddie once again in the crowd, smiling with tears in both your eyes. it’s like deja vu.

“thank you, for everything.” the sincerity in your voice must be heard by everyone, since the room begins to applaud once again and you’re guided off the stage.

you meant the last part to be directed towards him.

this would be his second time not graduating.

“eddie don’t beat yourself up over this, i’m sure that next year you’ll be walking that stage. and i’ll be there cheering you on.”

as you both make your way to the pool entrance, he looks over with you with an eyebrow raised.

“don’t give me that look! i mean it.” you give him a playful shove.

“mrs. o’donnell is always on my ass, i doubt that’ll change next year,” he sighed, “plus, it’ll be less fun without you there.”

he wraps an arm over your shoulders as you both make your way to a pair of empty chairs, settling your belongings down onto them.

you had brought some sliced fruit, drinks, sunscreen, and of course a towel.

“y’know i’m not going anywhere anytime soon, we can still see each other as much as we want this summer.” you finish putting down your things and sit on the edge of the chair, applying on sunscreen.

you look over at eddie who’s on his own chair beside your own, “yeah, but what if you change your mind about staying in hawkins? you should be doing bigger things than staying in this dump.”

he looks away from you and leans his head back onto the chair, playing with a strand of hair.

meanwhile, you open the container you had brought with the sliced fruit, eat a piece of apple, and pass the container to eddie. the thought of leaving hawkins was constant, who wouldn’t want to leave after seeing the things that you’ve seen? yet you couldn’t bring yourself to leave, one of the reasons being right beside you.

“i’ll just study here at the community college, see where that takes me. then, who knows what’ll happen?”

leaning back onto your own chair, you look over at eddie. his hair has begun to stick onto his skin from the heat, his loose shirt slightly slipping from his shoulder, the sunlight shining just right, enough for him to look as if he’s glowing.

he turns to look at you, smiling, “you’ll be out in some big city, doing whatever the hell you want! maybe we could even be roommates, like we’ve talked about.”

he grabs a piece of mango and takes a bite, excess juice dripping.

you smile, “yeah that’d be really nice. but for right now, i’m happy where i’m at.”

that year during the end of summer and towards the end of fall, you had your first boyfriend.

the relationship was not super long, and it never felt like there was much progress. he’d take you out to dates, he’d do everything right.

yet there was no true connection. it’s something you realize after the break up. you’d call each other—but no conversation ever had much depth.

but, when you were both together physically, you felt comfortable, you felt wanted. the cuddling, the kissing, you loved all of the relationship related things, and it made you believe you did love him.

it came crashing down when you saw him out with another girl, you were walking out a local coffee shop with robin when you spotted him. his arm linked with hers, no shame as he leaned over to kiss her, smiling.

it’s what lead you breaking down later that day in eddie’s trailer.

you had planned hanging out with him anyways. your now ex knew about your close friendship with eddie and he never seemed to really care. you realize that he never really cared about many things.

trying to act casual after your discovery and confrontation, you should’ve known better. eddie could see right through your act. be it the way you seemed less talkative, less enthusiastic, he knew something was up. he somehow always does.

he was telling a joke, trying to make you feel better—and you love his jokes, even if they’re the cringiest or stupidest ever, you always laugh or make some sarcastic remark—when he finishes telling his joke, you laughed, which made him smile.

both sitting on the couch, he laid his arm behind where you sat, pulling one of his legs up and turning to face you.

“sooo.. you wanna talk about it?”

you turn to him, your face written with confusion, “talk about what?”

“something’s obviously bothering you. and iiii do not like that.” he tilted his head, softly smiling.

“ah, how did you know?” you give him a small smile and look up to his ceiling, letting your head hit the cushions of the couch.

you see him shrug his shoulders from the corner of your eye, “i just know.”

the tears start to form before you even register it happening, and you tell him what happened.

and he’s there, like he always is. he holds you, let’s you cry to him about your ex. not knowing how much he hurts seeing you like this over a douchebag who didn’t deserve you to begin with.

he rubs your back, attempting to calm you down. you hadn’t realized you were clinging onto him, you pull back and just opt to laying your head onto his shoulder, a few start tears falling. he wipes them away and you close your eyes, feeling his hands soothe you.

that’s when you knew.

it all happened too quick, so suddenly.

one moment you were at the basket ball game, cheering lucas on.

the next eddie was on the run for supposed murder.

and now he was laying in front of you, on the ground.

dustin was kneeled with you, but the ringing in your ears blocking everything else out. all you could see was blood and all you could hear was your ragged breathing.

soon, your vision became blurry, tears clouding your vision. in one quick moment, you were back to the present. a shout. someone was yelling, you look in front of you and you see dustin crying, eddie on his lap.

you reach for eddie’s hand, intertwining it with your own, the other wiping tears away from his face. it was now your turn to wipe away his tears, but you would’ve preferred it to be over some girl, rather than it be because of what’s to come.

his hand is already startling cold, yet you still feel him tighten his hold on you.

“eddie, you gotta keep breathing alright? we’re gonna get you out of here. dustin! we have to get him out of here!” you look over at dustin, who heard you and you both move to get up, but eddie stops you both.

“no. no—” he momentarily chokes on his own blood that gathered in his mouth. he doesn’t let go of your hand and grabs dustin’s before he could get up.

“what do you mean no?!” you cry, moving to get up again.

“s-stop! there’s no,” he gulps, “no way i’ll be able to—” he coughs, blood splattering as he does so, you use the sleeve of your shirt to shakily clean his chin, “make it.”

he looks at you, and that’s when you see. that’s when you see he’s not changing his mind, he’s not going to let you and dustin pull him back.

a part of you knows, the logical part of you, that he won’t be able to make it. that it’ll be too late by the time you pull him back home.

so you cry, you cling to him. dustin cradles eddie’s head on his lap once again, you both cling to him.

“please. please don’t.” you say between sobs, your head on his chest, his heart beat still present, your hand still in his.

he doesn’t reply, he can’t. blood blocks him from saying anything else, so he brings your intertwined hands shakily up to his lips, kissing your hand. you bring your head up to look at him, and that’s when you knew.

that’s when you knew, everything was reciprocated. you don’t know how, but you did.

you both just know each other too well, but apparently not this.

he looked at you and attempted to smile, the three of you crying. already grieving what’s to come and what could’ve been.

you shake your head, “this isn’t fair! you never should’ve been a part of any of this mess! i—i tried so hard, so hard to keep you away from all of this. but it wasn’t enough.”

laying your head back onto his chest, you feel his free hand move to your back. the familiar feeling of him soothing you, rubbing your back, making you cry harder.

then suddenly, it all stopped.

it’s like time stopped all at once.

the movements on your back were gone, the soft heartbeat had stopped.

you’ve never been so affectionate with your other friends, but with ellie.. things are just different. you allow yourself to hug her, lean on her, grab her arm, any sort of physical touch. compared to your other friends, where there’s only an occasional hug or just a side hug.

you’re in denial of your feelings, blaming the events you’ve both been through together causing you to be so protective of ellie, be so drawn to her, always wanting her close.

it was only a matter of time before it all became too much; you just dreaded the day it would come to light, the fear of ruining such a meaningful and important relationship with someone who’s such a big part of your life. the glances you both give each other, the touches that linger, becoming too much. tricking your mind into thinking she feels the same, hope that there’s a chance.

you held onto that small bit of hope.

ellie’s arms were wrapped around you as your head lay on her chest, feeling it rise and fall as she took each breath, hearing the rhythmic sound of her heart.

you could stay like this forever.

you move yourself closer to her, wrapping your own arms around her waist, begging that she couldn’t hear or feel your own heart.

“what’re you thinking about?” she asked quietly, having been laying on her bed in comfortable silence for a few minutes now.

“how peaceful this is.” you reply, just as quietly. “it’s like we’re in our own little world.”

ellie began to subconsciously draw circles onto your back, causing you to suppress a shiver due to her simple touch.

you move your head slightly upwards in order to have a view of her face, only to find her focus already being on you.

a soft smile forms onto her face, lost in thought.

“what are you thinking about?” you nudge her playfully.

she hesitates for a moment, eyebrows furrowing, before answering.

“how beautiful you look right now.”

your face becomes hot.

“oh, shut up.” you laugh as you turn your head back down, trying to hide how flustered she’s got you, missing the slight look of disappointment from ellie.

there was a short moment of silence before you hear her voice again.

“i mean it.” she breathes out, her tracing on your back stopping.

you look back up to her, finding her gaze already on you yet again. a look of determination and sincerity covered her face.

her hand comes up to your face, causing you to lean into her touch without much thought.

“thank you.” you didn’t know what to say. yes, she’s given you compliments before, many causing your heart to pick up speed and make you kiss her right then and there— but this, this felt different.

you both stare at each other before beginning to laugh, nuzzling your head into the crook of her neck and tightening your hold on her.

“god, we’re so bad at this aren’t we?” she says, her hold on you tightening as well.

you free yourself from her hold, leaning yourself onto one of your elbows so that you’re laying sideways, looking down at her.

“..this?” you ask in disbelief, is this really happening?

you notice ellie’s look, her eyebrows furrowed and avoiding your gaze, realizing that she took your reaction as something negative.

“ellie… what do you mean?”

she meets your gaze once again, eyes slightly wide. “i just—” she sighs before continuing, “maybe i took things the wrong way. i’m sorry.” she moves to get up, feeling embarrassed.

“no, ellie. you didn’t, honestly i thought i was the one who was taking things the wrong way.” you push her back down onto the bed, eyes hopeful and relieved. a smile on your face as you looked down at ellie, who also wore a look of relief—as well as disbelief.

“you’re my best friend, ellie. i love you, but what i feel is so much more than what just a friend should feel.”

she smiles up at you, hands coming to brush away loose strands of hair, once again holding your face.

“well. that’s good. i’m glad we got that straight.” suddenly she grabs your waist, having you lay on top of her. you pull yourself up, now sitting and slightly flustered by the position, “because i love you, too.”

“can i kiss you?” she looks up at you, hands resting on your waist as she awaited for an answer.

you lean down until your close to her face, hands on each side of her head on the bed, caging her in.

“yes.”

with that, she leans up, you meet her halfway and you feel her lips on yours.

and it’s everything you expected it to be.

her lips were slightly chapped, yet soft. her hand coming to the side of your head, you lean into the touch, making the kiss deeper.

you break the kiss once you ran out of air, both of you looking breathless and content.

ellie leans back up and gives you multiple pecks all around your face—as well as your lips, causing you to let out a giggle.

you let yourself lay atop of ellie, feeling her arms wrap around your waist securely.

karen noticed the last coffee in the tray, “did you pick one up for y/n? she won’t be giving us company today.. but i’m sure you already knew that when you entered.” he felt her smirk slightly at him.

he leaned slightly onto her desk, the folded up cane still in his hands, then turned his head to karen. “why isn’t she here today?”

“said she was sick, so she decided to stay home for today or until she feels better.”

matt nodded his head, why didn’t you tell him? he had tried to call you before he came to work, but you didn’t answer so he left you a voicemail thinking you just weren’t up yet, deciding not to worry because it’s happened before and you always called back once you heard it.

he cleared his throat and stood up making his way to his own office. “i’ll just see her after we’re done for today.”

after he closed the door behind him, karen and foggy shared a knowing look.

the day passed by pretty quickly, matt focused himself into his work so when he heard the knock on his door he realized it’s time to go.

“c’mon matt, time to gooo.” foggy stood at the door entrance and held his jacket in his hands.

“already? okay, good.” he got up and put his stuff together, walking out of his office to greet his friends.

“you guys all set?” karen said.

to which they both nodded and they were walking out the building.

foggy and karen were on their own way home, matt was going over to yours.

“good luck with that. i tried telling her i would come over but she refused to let me go, said she didn’t want me sick.” karen told matt, “but it’s you. so maybe she’ll let you in.”

she got into the cab before matt could even respond. and good thing, because he felt his face heat up.

he made his way to your apartment, so now he stood in front of your door getting ready to knock.

before he did, he listened carefully to the inside. force of habit. but he only heard your steady heartbeat so, he knocked.

you got up from your spot on the couch and walked over to the door, looking through the peep hole.

soon your voice was heard behind the door. “matt? what’re you doing here?”

“came to check up on you, you didn’t return my call earlier.” he heard you curse under your breath, making him let out a smile.

“did i? i’m so sorry. i slept in today and got really uh… busy?”

“yeah. will you please let me in?”

“uhm.. i’m not really in a great state right now. a bit messy in here too.”

there was a moment where both of you said nothing.

“y/n, you do know i can’t tell when you’re lying right?”

he heard you sigh. “yeah i know. worth a shot though.”

you opened the door, a blanket wrapped around your frame and you finally let out a cough that you’ve been holding back, letting matt walk in.

“i’m guessing that karen told you that i’m sick?”

“she did. but.. why didn’t you tell me?”

you closed the door and locked it, following him soon after. he walked to your living room, folded his cane, putting it on the coffee table, and sat on the couch, you sitting next to him.

he tilted his head toward you, waiting for an answer.

“just didn’t really want you to worry about me, i guess. you already have a lot going on.” you coughed again, getting up to grab a tissue.

matt still sat on your couch, shook his head.

“how’re you feeling though? are you alright?” he got up and followed you, now standing in the kitchen.

“mmm, just got a really horrible cough. runny nose. and i feel sore, headache.” coughing into your elbow again, you let out a groan.

you moved to fill up a kettle with water to make some tea, but matt took it from you to do it himself.

“hey! you don’t have to y’know?”

“oh i know. but i want to.” he smiled over at you and put it on the stove to heat up.

you smiled back at him, slightly tilting your head.

“let’s go back to the couch, yeah?” you walked back and threw yourself onto it, letting out a sigh. then sneezing.

you heard matt laugh as he entered the room, you sat up and playfully glared at him.

“you’re laughing at me being miserable. you’re so evil.” he sat next to you and rubbed your back, causing you to lean your head onto his shoulder.

you immediately separated yourself from him.

“wait no! i don’t want you to get sick too!” you got up and moved yourself to the recliner beside the big couch you were just at.

“you won’t get me sick y/n/n.” smiling at you again.

“yes i will!” you cleaned your nose with the tissue in your hand.

“you’re just gonna jinx it if you keep saying it.” he raised his eyebrows at you.

“matt, i really don’t want you sick.” you were serious this time.

“it’ll be fine, come over here.” he opened his arms and you just couldn’t resist.

you got up and walked over to your previous spot, leaning into his embrace, wrapping your arms around his waist, and pulling your feet up under you.

you sighed in content, pushing him down so that you’re both now laying down.

he let out a grunt, not expecting you to do that.

you moved the blanket that you had to cover both of you. your back pressed against the couch cushions and facing mat, still hugging, so basically you were cuddling now.

but the moment was ruined when the sound of the kettle caused you both to open your eyes.

“i’ll get it.” matt’s voice was soft, nearly a whisper.

you groaned as you felt him get up, his warmth lingering.

he came back to find you asleep, setting down the mugs filled with tea onto the coffee table and sitting by you smiling softly, pushing away some strands of hair that was on your face.

you woke up and immediately started coughing, again.

you opened your eyes to find that you were in your room instead of the couch.

did matt move you to your bed?

you tried to sit up but you felt your head start to spin, continuing to cough nearly choking, you ran to the bathroom and threw up. great.

you were on the floor kneeling over the toilet seat when you heard someone approaching you, it was matt, he pulled your hair away from your face.

catching your breath you let out a small laugh.

“that was so gross.” sitting up and leaning your back on the tub, you reached four for some toilet paper, cleaning some of the snot that came out of your nose, matt helping you to stand up and walk over to the sink.

you started to clean your face, matt grabbing your toothbrush and putting some toothpaste on it.

“matt seriously it’s okay, i can do that.”

you grabbed the toothbrush from him.

“i just want to help you.” he put one of his hands on your shoulder, it was then when you realized that he had no shirt on, did you wake him up?

you started to blush. no! he can feel that! get yourself together.

he waited by your side as you finished brushing your teeth. finally, you turned to face him, wrapping your arms around his neck. one hand coming down to rest on his chest. you felt his heartbeat pick up, making you smile.

“i know another way for you to help me.” it was his turn to blush.

“yeah?” he leaned in, and so did you. both of your foreheads now touching.

whispering you said, “can you make me some breakfast?”

he let out a laugh and so did you.

“of course i can. what would you like?”

“hmm.. what about some pancakes?” he wrapped his arms around your waist.

“sounds good.”

“good! meanwhile.. i’ll go take a shower. maybe it’ll help me.” you let go to open the cabinet behind the mirror above the sink to grab some medicine while he still kept one arm around you.

“okay. just keep the door unlocked, will you? just in case you slip or something.”

you turned your head to face him, he wasn’t wearing his glasses so you looked at his eyes.

“i will matt.”

“alright then, i’ll go make those pancakes for us.”

he took a deep breath and gave you a soft squeeze as he was about to leave the bathroom.

“if you need help just tell me alright?” you called after him.

“i basically already know where everything is, i’ll be fine.”

you walked back to your room to grab some clothes, sticking to some sweats, an old shirt of matt’s, and your undergarments.

when you got out the bathroom you were hit the scent of pancakes.

making your way to the kitchen you leaned against the counter. the sight of matt flipping pancakes making you smile.

“hey, how’re you feeling? did the shower help?” he turned towards you, he was now wearing a shirt.

“i think so yeah. less dizzy, i feel more.. awake.”

“good! because breakfast,” he plopped a pancake onto a plate and passed it over to you, “is served.”

“thank you matt. seriously.” you sat down and poured some syrup on it as he sat next to you and served himself too.

“this is so good. maybe i should get sick more often.”

“please don’t,” he laughed.

as you two finished up you both decided to stay in.

once again sitting on the couch cuddling up. having a random movie playing in the background. you looked up at him, moving your head up from his chest.

“thank you for coming to see me matt.”

he tilted his head down. “of course. i just want to make sure you’re okay y/n.”

he felt your heart speed up and he leaned down, one of your hands coming up to rest against his chest and feel his heart again, feeling that it’s the same as yours.

soon the space between the two of you became less and less until you both met halfway and leaned into a kiss.

after a few moments you both pulled away, grinning and flustered.

“that was really great.” he said.

“yeah, it was.”

then, he started to cough.

“i told you, you’d get sick matthew!”

if you were a waiting room, i would never see a doctor, i would sit there with my first aid kit and bleed

sitting at the dining room table with alfred after waking up to yet another empty bed, you sipped the coffee you had made, looking off to the large window in front if you.

seriously, you’d never understand why people enjoy having large houses for a small amount of people. it gets so lonely.

usually you would wait the day and help alfred, help dory around the building, or just simply explore the numerous amount of rooms.

but today was different, you were going to go back to the apartment you had before you met bruce. you decided to keep it, wanting to have a place to go if anything went wrong, but mainly to have a piece of independence.

once you’ve finished up the remaining coffee from your cup, you turn to face alfred, who was by your side reading the newspaper.

slightly clearing your throat, you catch his attention, his curious gaze meeting up with yours once he sees your own nervous one.

“is something on your mind today?” he breaks the silence, after being in your presence while bruce was away in the cave, he’s learned to know your habits. how much you’ve grown to care for bruce as much as he has, and what you would do to be there for him.

but of course, one can only be pushed to the edge so much after a period of time.

he had spoke to bruce about it, how you were slowly wearing out from bruce’s absence. but he had only continued to distract himself, which he usually does when something troubles him.

he had hoped that his suspicions about what you were about to say were false, knowing how much you mean to bruce. although he can’t deny how badly he’s been treating you lately.

“well, yes actually,” you nervously looked down at your hands that were folded on top of the table, “i was thinking about going back to my apartment for today.”

“to just get some time for myself, y’know?” you let out a small laugh, “although i’ve been getting plenty.”

you turn your gaze back up to him, “but to clear my head.. at my own place.”

you hadn’t realized the tears that have firmed in your eyes until you felt the tension in your throat.

alfred takes in a deep breath, then nods.

“if you think it would be for the best. i understand why you would want to get out for a bit.”

as you nod he continues, “but.. i’m sure he’ll still ask for your whereabouts once he sees you’re not here tonight.”

biting at the inside of your cheek you look away.

“could you.. can you please not tell him where i’ll be? though i’m sure he’ll find out sooner or later.”

you hear him let out a small sigh as he lays a hand onto your shoulder and responds, “i can do that.”

i want to be the power ballad that lifts you up and holds you down

walking into the apartment you realize how long it’s been since you were last in there.

the place looked gloomy, the grey and rainy climate of gotham really setting the scene and matching your emotional state.

dust settled onto the counters and your bedroom was the same as you had left it.

with a defeated sigh, you dropped the bags you had packed with you onto the floor by the couch, turning to lock the door.

turning back, you dropped yourself onto the said couch. closing your eyes, just for a moment.

you hadn’t realized how much this had taken a toll on you.

maybe you were just being over dramatic. going out at night and doing what he does.. you knew were you were getting yourself into. suddenly you felt guilty. you know that you shouldn’t.

maybe i shouldn’t of had left so suddenly. what was i thinking?

you mentally scolded yourself as you sat up. no, no, no. you weren’t going to blame yourself for this.

you had been there during the past months, for him. you were there when he came back at night, you were there when he was injured, you were there when he wakes up, you were there when he needed you the most. you were always there.

when has he ever been there for you?

when was the last time he had had a full conversation with you? that wasn’t about his batman duties? how king has it been since he asked about you?

when did everything become so one sided? was the question that kept repeating itself through your mind as you finally got up and got ready for bed, and as you drifted off into sleep.

and i can wish all that i want, but it won't bring us together

he sighed as he finally made his way back to the manor. all he wanted to do right now is to climb into bed and hold you.

after everything, he was glad to finally have some sort of constant.

he knew that he had been distant.

alfred had told him about you. he was scared from the thought of you leaving.

but he was too caught up in himself, that he didn’t realize how bad it had truly gotten.

would you leave him?

as he went into the batcave and parked his motorcycle, he took off the helmet and suit, going over the night through the contacts.

though his mind was elsewhere, something didn’t feel right.

he brushed it off as him still being in edge from being batman.

as he made his way up and walked his way to the bedroom, he saw alfred, who was still awake and reading a book by the fireplace.

“hey, alfred.” his voice was tired, the events from tonight finally catching up to him, making him sleepy.

“master wayne, you’re back.” he closed his book and placed it onto the coffee table in front of him.

bruce made his way to stand by the doorframe.

“yes.” he let out a yawn, missing the anxious look from alfred.

“how was your night?”

“not much today. just a couple of thieves. but.. i’m going to go get some rest now.” he turned and continued to make his way towards the bedroom.

where he let himself finally release the tension he had, knowing you’ll be asleep by now, bringing a rare soft smile onto his face.

as he opened the door he doesn’t see the made bed, drowsiness clouding his mind.

he carefully walks over to the drawers and pulls out a pair of comfortable pants and a black shirt, putting them on.

the extreme quietness causes his eyebrows to furrow. normally you would wake from his noise, or at least your evened breaths would carry through the room.

but none of it was there today. as he finishes getting changed for the second time that night he turns back around and finally realizes.

you weren’t there.

immediately he panics.

where have you gone? had you left? had something happened?

no, no. alfred would’ve said something if something bad had happened.

the thought makes him go back out the room and back into where alfred was still seated. his face leaning onto a fist that was resting on the armrest of the seat.

he knew. he knew you were gone. that’s why he was awake now. that’s why he was still waiting for him to come back, knowing he would come with questions.

but does he really want to know why you left? would he want to know the answers?

“y/n left.” bruce had said. already knowing. not even bothering to ask if there were any other explanations.

alfreds nod was the only confirmation he needed.

“where did they go?”

“they had requested for me not to tell you.”

bruce took a deep breath. he already knew where you have gone, your apartment.

but he wasn’t that stupid.

he knew you wouldn’t want him to come over, and he won’t, at least not tonight.

he wanted to have a functional mind when he talks to you tomorrow, so he walked away and got into bed, feeling strange since your presence wasn’t there tonight.

plus, i know whatever happens to me, i know it's for the better

as the morning came, you woke up to the skins of knocking coming from your door.

you rolled onto your back and draped an arm over your eyes.

the knocking continued.

maybe if you keep quiet he’ll think you’re somewhere else.

“(y/n)? if you’re in there.. please, let me talk to you.”

you took your arm off your face. debating if you should get up or not.

but the knocking kept coming.

“okay! alright, i’m coming.”

you got up and stretched, looking at yourself in the mirror and deciding you looked presentable, though he’s seen you at your worst.

finally, you moved in front of the door. suddenly the nerves started to hit you.

ah shit.

now or never, right?

you opened the door to reveal bruce.

“hey (y/n).”

you let him through and closed it after he came in, “hey.”

you both stood there for a moment as you both didn’t know what to say.

it was never like this before.

“you left.” he stated.

you moved to sit at the couch as he followed, sitting beside you.

“yes, i did.”

“i’m sorry.”

you didn’t say anything back. you stared down at your hands, something you did when you were nervous, picking at your nails.

“please, say something.” he turned to face you fully. grabbing your hands and covering them with his own, catching your attention.

“do you even know what you’re saying sorry for, bruce?” you looked up at him to find he was already looking at you.

“i know.. that i’ve been busy, i got too caught up with things. i should’ve just occasionally even try to just sit and talk to you. and i’m sorry. i’m sorry that i’ve became distant and made you worry.”

“bruce..” you sigh, “i know that you’ve been trying. and i’m so proud of you for that. but.. i just.. don’t think this is good for me.”

“what do you mean? what are you saying?” although you know he tries to hide it, you can feel the slight shaking from his hands, or maybe it’s just your own.

“i think we should break up.”

you feel his hands still and you feel like you’re going to suffocate from the tension in the room.

his hands have yet to leave your own.

he lets out a shaky sigh. one hand leaving yours to push through his hair and dragging it down his face.

him now being the one who keeps his gaze down.

you wait for a response, anything. knowing it’s best not to push for a response. letting him take his time.

he starts nodding his head gently as he gives your hands a squeeze and let’s go of them.

the first actual physical contact you’ve had from him apart from the embraces you’ve had at night, which were always short lived since you both fall back into sleep right after.

but this time it was different. you both knew that after this there wouldn’t be anymore of those nights.

“can we.. still talk? from time to time?” he says it so quietly that if you weren’t paying attention you would’ve missed it.

you know about how he has trouble with attachments. something you always understood, but now you’re the one causing him pain. which you hated.

“yes bruce, of course we can.”

you feel a tear come down your face, quickly wiping it away. but he noticed, his own unshed tears filling his eyesight.

he knew he had things to improve himself on.

he had to try to make things right.

so he stood up, you following his actions, leading him to the door.

you both stood at the doorway, after a long period of time of being around each other.. it’ll be strange for the both of you, you both knew.

with hesitation, he asked, “can i hug you?”

you let out a laugh, “yes you can hug me.”

both of you stood there, you didn’t know how long has passed, with your arms around his neck and his own firm around your waist, face against your neck. feeling his tears that fell onto your shoulder.

after he had calmed down, he pulled away and gave you a small smile. one you’ve seen before, but still always made you return one back, loving the way it looks on him.

but for now, he goes on his way back to his own home as you close the door behind him.

both of you choosing to improve on yourselves and maybe, someday, if it’s meant to be, you’ll find each other again.