#jun 9th

June, 9th

I want to be the couple that not only looks good together but has an admirable quality to each other. I want to hug up and two step when we go out to clubs. That couple that sees The world infront of them but walks together to conquer it. I want you to want to follow me to the ends of the earth as I would you. I mean I can be selfish but that's what love does for me. It make me want to give up e wry thing for you. It makes you home. My home. I'd hope you'd make me yours or want me to be your home some day. Home... You know whenever my mind wonders on home I remember that I don't have one. I'd think it would be my moms house but it's not. I haven't had a home since I left my grandmothers house. The only place I seem to wonder to in my dreams are your doorsteps. My mind leads me and I but only follow it and its your red steps I find myself sitting on, watching the stars, taking a nap. Your steps that lead me home. I know that's crazy , I should be more welcoming to my own family , but in my lifetime I haven't felt more at home anywhere. Home is where the heart lies and mine lies with you, wherever you are.

I had the most disturbing thougth. Suicidal thoughts have yet to affect me like this one. It's a revelation and yet my own death letter. "I'm going to make it so no one will ever be able to take anything from me, for I giveth freely. No man will eer rape me for I will relinquish the option of submission, take away the variable of force and welcome easily. I do not care if I die for I have someone. Waiting for me. You will never get the satisfaction of taking my life. I will give it freely. " Most disturbing. If it were someone. Else in my place I would do anything to save them.