#judiciouswarray

HEY!

"Violets are blue, and so are your eyes. If I can't look into them I'd surely die."

Congratulations, Sherlock.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] began pestering sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] at 21:57 --

JW: Sherlock...

SH: What is it?

JW: I think I just... saw your brother snogging Anderson...

SH: ........

SH: Say that again.

JW: You can read!

SH: Yes, but...

SH: My brother. And Anderson.

JW: Yyyyeah.

SH: Snogging.

JW: Yep.

SH: You saw that?

SH: Seriously?

JW: I think they were biting a lot, their mouths were all bloody and stuff too.

SH: Because I'm pretty sure the human memory on visual matters is only sixty percent accurate.

SH: Really.

JW: It was pretty traumatic, I think I'd remember.

SH: Well, if it's true...

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] rubs his hands gleefully --

Why ME?

It's a bit easier to understand why you, in comparison to an inanimate object and Anderson.

Looks like you’re popular enough to have those creepy fans.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] began pestering judiciousWarray [JW] at 19:00 --

SH: Look, John!

JW: What?

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] points to transportaliser --

JW: What's that?

SH: Not quite sure.

SH: It could be many things, couldn't it? But the only way to know is to examine it.

SH: Come on.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] cautiously follows after Sherlock --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] puts a foot on the transportaliser --

JW: Careful!

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] steps onto transportaliser and disappears --

JW: Sherlock!

-- judiciousWarray [JW] jumps on it after him, transportalizing to some sort of lab --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] is already examining lab. --

JW: Where are we?

SH: Hmm. Some sort... of... laboratory.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] finds two bright green ectobiologist lab suits --

JW: ....What.

SH: Suits.

SH: Hm.

SH: Horrendous colour.

JW: Agreed.

SH: Not putting them on?

JW: Absolutely not.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] examines nearby station. --

SH: Eight panels.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] presses button --

SH: Recently calibrated.

SH: It's fixed on...

JW: WAIT, SHERLOCK.

JW: DON'T TOUCH THOSE!

SH: What?

JW: YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY DO!

SH: This is most interesting. The screen is date-stamped with your birthday. It's a neighbourhood in Surrey. Do you recognise this, John?

JW: Yeah, I guess, BUT STOP TOUCHING THINGS.

SH: Why, it's your neighbourhood, John! I'm surprised. Hm.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] zooms in to see NEWBORN JOHN WATSON --

SH: Oh my.

SH: John, is this you as a baby?

JW: ....YES.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] stifles a giggle. --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] presses blue button --

JW: HEY.

JW: STOP PRESSING THINGS!

-- judiciousWarray [JW] swats at Sherlock's hands --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] creates PARADOX GHOST IMPRINT of baby John --

SH: Careful, John!

SH: This is all very intriguing!

SH: Look at that. This must be the result of me attempting to appearify something from the past.

SH: Obviously if I had taken you as a human, I would have created a time paradox.

SH: Therefore this must be the safety mechanism. A paradox ghost imprint.

JW: A what?

SH: A paradox ghost imprint! See that sludge? It must contain your genetic information. It merely substitutes as you, because I cannot snatch you from your timeline.

JW: Oh.

JW: How did you figure that out?

SH: Well, I tried to appearify you just now with this button, but I did not get you, did I?

JW: True...

SH: So what I created must be a substitute.

JW: Aleight...

JW: Now this has been all well and good, Sherlock,

JW: BUT WE'RE STOPPING NOW.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] switches to another monitor, one of Holmes manor on Mycroft's birthday. --

JW: SHERLOCK.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] presses blue button again and appearifies BABY MYCROFT. --

JW: Okay fine, I give up.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] spins on his heel and starts wandering the lab --

SH: Hmm..

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] switches to yet another monitor of Holmes Manor, but on his own birthday. --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] appearifies BABY SHERLOCK. --

SH: Did I really look like that as a child?

JW: How cute!

SH: Ugh.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] finds a large plush jumper behind a few storage boxes --

SH: What'd you find?

JW: Oh, it's just a jumper I guess. Wonder how it got here....

SH: Looks like one of yours.

JW: Really?

SH: Yes.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] walks back over to Sherlock --

JW: Still messing with things you shouldn't be messing with?

SH: What is it, John?

SH: Ah.

SH: Yes.

SH: Five more.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] switches to screen showing BABY LESTRADE and appearifies him. --

-- judiciousWarray [JW] rolls his eyes and continues roaming the lab --

SH: Now let me see...

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] switches to another screen to appearify paradox slime of BABY ANDERSON. --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] switches and appearifies paradox slime of BABY DONOVAN. --

-- judiciousWarray [JW] eventually comes back some time later with an armful of various items --

SH: Interesting.

SH: That looks like Mycroft's umbrella.

SH: Is it same to assume that it is?

JW: Maybe.

JW: I wouldn't know.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] appearifies paradox slime of BABY MORIARTY. --

SH: That's interesting.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] dumps all the items on the floor nearby --

SH: Look, John. Look at what I just made.

JW: A bunch of slime?

JW: I'm so excited for you Sherlock.

JW: [rolls his eyes]

SH: Look!

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] appearifies slime of BABY IRENE --

SH: Look at her.

SH: Look!

JW: I'm looking!

SH: Fine! Observe!

JW: Okay, what am I supposed to observe, exactly?

SH: Do you see the features of the - ugh.

SH: It's gone.

SH: Those last two were paradox ghost imprints of Moriarty and Irene, John.

JW: Yes, and?

SH: They supposedly 'hacked' into our session, but the game anticipated them, didn't they?

SH: This is important. This shows why the game anticipated them.

SH: They were meant to do this all along.

JW: Oh.

SH: Mm.

SH: Do you see it now?

JW: Yeah, I get it.

SH: Oh look. The machine.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] watches the machine read the sequence. --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] watches eight baby PARADOX CLONES pop into existence. --

JW: ....What.

SH: There's one more button -

JW: NO.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] reaches for the green DNA button --

JW: SHERLOCK, STOP.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] smacks Sherlock's hands --

SH: But... what's going to happen?

JW: You shouldn't be messing with this stuff!

JW: It doesn't matter what it does!

SH: I'm curious. Would it mix our DNA together and form paradox clones of what our children would look like?

SH: Because I'm really curious, John.

SH: I think Mycroft and Anderson would make smashing babies.

JW: ....

JW: .......

JW: No Sherlock.

SH: All right, fine.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] rolls his eyes, then looks down when one of the babies tugs on his pant leg --

JW: Aww, baby Mycroft is actually kind of cute.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] picks him up and tosses him in the air --

SH: Careful, John!

-- judiciousWarray [JW] catches him --

JW: Oh don't worry, Sherlock.

SH: Strange that I'm the one worrying.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] gives a long suffering sigh. --

SH: We'll never know what our babies look like.

JW: And it's not really something that ever needs to be known! Isn't dat right, Mycwoft... [coos at baby Mycroft]

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] thinks that John looks ridiculously cute cooing at baby Mycroft but doesn't say anything --

-- judiciousWarray [JW] sets him down and grabs the umbrella, dropping it in Mycroft's lap --

SH: Oh, is that why Mycroft has a fixation with umbrellas.

SH: Is that why.

JW: Haha, maybe!

-- judiciousWarray [JW] leans down to ruffle his babyself's hair --

SH: Therefore you only have yourself to blame.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] reaches over and grabs the jumper, pulling it over baby John's hair. --

SH: Scratch that, blame me.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] jumps when baby Sherlock starts climbing up his person --

JW: Woah there!

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] stifles a chuckle --

SH: What do they usually say? Right. He likes you.

JW: Oh, I'm so glad you've liked me since you were an infant--ow!

-- judiciousWarray [JW] pulls baby Sherlock away from his hair --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] laughs --

SH: You should get him something to play with.

SH: How about the skull?

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] hands skull to baby Sherlock and turns to see baby John admiring the paradox slime. --

JW: Alright, as soon as he decides he wants to stop being a little brat!

SH: According to Mycroft, that will never happen.

SH: -to baby John- No, Jawn, that is not jam.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] laughs to himself and sets baby Sherlock back down on the floor --

SH: -to baby John- Would you like some jam? Here.

SH: There's bound to be jam somewhere in this laboratory.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] finds a jar of jam and hands it to baby John --

-- judiciousWarray [JW] watches in amusement as baby Irene crawls up to him and tries to take the skull, unsuccessfully so --

SH: Why is there a picture of me in this pile?

SH: I hope Munchkin Moriarty doesn't find it.

SH: But then that would explain everything.

JW: [snorts]

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] watches as Baby Irene finds the picture of him. --

SH: Oh.

JW: No wonder.

SH: And that explains why Donovan likes... what she calls 'yaoi'... and why Anderson likes Dinosaurs.

SH: John, did you really have to find the toy dinosaur?

SH: We only have ourselves to blame for this.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] laughs and picks up baby Greg --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] hands him the police helmet --

-- judiciousWarray [JW] places it on his head and laughs when it falls to his shoulders --

SH: Now we've done it, John.

SH: The two of us.

JW: Aww Gweg, you're gonna be such a good guy when you gwow up, awen't you... [coos, ignoring Sherlock]

SH: Responsible for every quirk the others suffer.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] watches baby John try to unscrew the jar of jam with a whisper of a smile on his face. --

SH: John, what are you doing?

SH: Keep the cake away from baby Mycroft.

JW: Oh jeez!

SH: Too late, John.

-- judiciousWarray [JW] picks up baby Mycroft and occupies his hands with his own fingers --

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] pouts --

SH: How did - oh never mind, he's Mycroft.

SH: Of course he'd be able to pick up cake with his feet.

JW: Can he actually do that?

-- judiciousWarray [JW] stares at Mycroft in amazement --

SH: The things he did before he got lazy.

SH: Hm.

SH: Everyone else has their objects, so I suppose it's only natural for the last one to go to Moriarty.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] watches Baby Moriarty pick up the chess set. --

SH: I think we should leave them now, John.

SH: The Reckoning will take them to their places.

JW: Leave? But they're babies!

JW: The what?

SH: The Reckoning, John.

SH: The thing we're trying to save Skaia from. Point of the game.

SH: And besides, this is a baby me, a baby Mycroft, a baby Moriarty, a baby Irene.

SH: I'm sure they can fend for themselves for a few hours.

-- sanctimoniousHermetic [SH] ceased pestering judiciousWarray [JW] at 22:04 --

CSH RIGHT NOW opened memo on board JOHN AND SHERLOCK ASCEND.

CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.

CJW: This looks extremely difficult to climb.

CSH: Yes, it's in the shape of dinosaurs rutting against each other.

CSH: Why else?

CJW: ...OH.

CJW: THAT'S WHAT IT WAS...

CSH: Yes, and you've been climbing over the inappropriate parts now can we move on?

CJW: Jesus.

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] begins his ascent --

-- CURRENT sanctimoniousHermetic [CSH] casually slips on Rocketpack and flies up past John --

CJW: Woah!

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] pulls out his jetpack and follows Sherlock's example --

CSH: Coming along?

CSH: I see.

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] makes it a race --

-- CURRENT sanctimoniousHermetic [CSH] zooms through the green gate --

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] loses aforementioned race --

CGL ceased responding to memo.

-- CURRENT sanctimoniousHermetic [CSH] enters Land of Light and Crowns --

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] is instantly blinded and crash lands on a nearby throne --

CSH: John!

-- CURRENT sanctimoniousHermetic [CSH] flies over to John --

CSH: You all right?

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] sits up and rubs his head --

CJW: I'm fine, it's just really really bright here.

CJW: What is this, the Land of Light and the Ocularly Handicapped??

CSH: Light and crowns.

CSH: Moriarty.

CJW: Oh.

CJW: [groans]

CSH: I told you.

CJW: I've got to say, I think I'd much rather prefer Irene.

-- CURRENT sanctimoniousHermetic [CSH] picks up a random crown --

CSH: Interesting taste.

CURRENT jesuiticalMagpie [CJM] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.

CJM: better than ~yours~

CJM: westwood.

CSH: I did not know Vivienne Westwood designed crowns.

CJM: of course she does. after all, she has good ~taste~ ;)

CJM: anywayyyy~

CJM: i've been ~waiting~ for you boys to arrive.

CJM: took you quite a while, didn't it~?

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] gapes at Moriarty --

CJM: ... is he quite alright?

CJM: did your brain short-circuit or something, johnny boy~?

CJW: IT'S YOU.

CJW: YOU'RE JIM!

CJM: yes!! me!!!

CSH: Former roommate?

CJM: that's my name, yes.

CSH: The one who put John's belongings in jello?

CJW: YES, HIM.

CJM: ohh, guilty~

CSH: Hm. I can see why John left.

CJM: oh, i'm wounded, mr. holmes. :'(

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] grabs the crown out of Sherlock's hands and throws it at Moriarty --

-- CURRENT jesuiticalMagpie [CJM] catches it. --

CSH: -raises an eyebrow-

CAA ceased responding to memo.

CJM: are you that repulsed by me~? jeeeeeez, a bit of an overreaction, isn't it?

CSH: John, I think you need to calm down a little.

CJM: i agree.

CJW: Oh shut up, you.

CSH: So tell me, Moriarty, how exactly did you get into our session?

CSH: I know the game anticipated your move, but exactly how you did it eludes me somewhat.

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] sits and sulks on the throne --

CJM: ohhhh, i have 'eluded' the brilliant sherlock holmes~? how intriguing.

CJM: anyway, mr. holmes, i'm afraid a magician never reveals their secrets! ;o

CJM: i think it's suffice to say that i have an app for that. ;)

CSH: A magician. I see.

CSH: Not quite the 'king' that Miss Adler refers to, but I suppose in a way it's applicable.

CJM: the king?

CJM: ah, yes...

CSH: -raises the other eyebrow-

CJM: irene does love her metaphors.

CJM: but then again, so do i.

CSH: I can tell.

CSH: The Black King, on his black throne in Derse.

CSH: Perfect metaphor for someone like yourself.

CJM: ohhhh, is it?

CJM: hmm, it does quite have a certain ring to it...

CSH: Miss Adler established it.

CJM: yes, i got that much, thank you.

CSH: -twitches eyebrow in mild annoyance-

CJW: So is there a point to this conversation?

CJM: there's always a point to every conversation, mr. watson~

CSH: So there must be a reason why you met us out here.

CSH: Other than greeting the neighbours.

CJM: mmmm, possibly? honestly, i was just passing by... this is ~my~ land, after all~

CJM: also it's a bit difficult to miss the crash landing...

CJM: your fall really was quite ~graceful~, john. good job.

CJW: Shut up.

CSH: Yes, do.

CSH: John, I think it's time we were going?

CJW: Yes, definitely.

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] gets up and starts walking in the opposite direction --

-- CURRENT judiciousWarray [CJW] tries to ignore the part of his brain silently appreciating the coolness factor of Moriarty's god tier outfit--

CJM: so soon~? ヽ(￣д￣;)ノ

CJM: oh well...

CSH: I'm afraid so?

CJM: i was really hoping you'd come and play a little longer~ (╯3╰,)

-- CURRENT sanctimoniousHermetic [CSH] frowns at the message --

CSH: It's all a game with you, isn't it?

-- CURRENT sanctimoniousHermetic [CSH] turns around to catch up with John --

CJW ceased responding to memo.