#joweldon

Get The Gig!

Hot tip!

And before you read this, don't feel bad if you've done it, we all do it sometimes when we're tired or in a hurry. But just a reminder:

When someone makes a post about an opportunity and says, "Please email only" or "Please send questions via DM" or other specific instructions that do not suggest asking questions in the comments, and you then ask a question in the comments which is what they just asked you not to do (or vice versa, ie if they DID ask for replies only in the comments and you sent a DM instead), there's a possibility you've just made it clear that you don't read and follow instructions, making yourself less desirable to work with.

It's not just social media posts. Whenever someone asks me the best way to apply for a festival, or a gig of any kind, my suggestion is:

1) Read the instructions.

My second suggestion is:

2) Follow the instructions.

My third and final suggestion is:

3) Don't ask the OP any questions if there's another way to get the answer, such as reading the instructions.

How to Prepare for Festival Applications, Producers, and Press

Becoming a successful performer requires investments of learning, preparation, and practice to get your acts together. Once you’ve got the acts, you’ll want to get organized for the business. This article is about preparing for submitting to producers and festivals, to help you get over the jitters that can come along with knowing you’re about to be scrutinized. These folders will help you if you get interviewed by press, as well, since they may request materials.

Even if this exact form of organization is not the one that works for you, I hope the ideas here will help you find one that does. Although I will be using Dropbox as an example of a sharing protocol, you can use whatever works for you – and if the producer/festival/interviewer asks you to send attachments instead of links, do it as they request, and absolutely do not tell them it’s a problem for you in any way. You should have this folder both on your device and in your Dropbox/cloud/etc. so that you can send as attachments or link, as they request. Be prepared to make it convenient and easy for them. Send all materials ahead of deadlines. Also, be prepared to set boundaries in a calm, professional manner if they are too demanding or make inappropriate requests.

1)      Create a folder for your burlesque materials and name it with your Stage Name. Upload it to Dropbox or your choice of shareable backup system. This way if you need to direct a producer to all your work, you can simply send them a link to your folder. Because they view a lot of folder, naming it after your stage name is a crucial organizing function. If it was just named “Burlesque,” it would get confused with other folders they access called “Burlesque.” You can keep information that you need to be private or variable in a separate folder called Stage Name Personal, or whatever folder name works for you. Remember to have your stage name everywhere – it is the one item that distinguishes your folders and files from all the other folders and files burlesque performers and producers accumulate. Using folders as described here allows you the opportunity to send full folders or individual links to files, as you prefer or are requested to do.

2)      Within the Your Stage Name Folder, create folders named Your Stage Name Photos, Your Stage Name Bios, Your Stage Name Videos, YourStageNameMusic, Your Stage Name Class Descriptions, or whatever else you think they are likely to offer. This way, if they ask only for photos or bios, you can send them just that link or that specific material. If other naming conventions work better for you, do them, but keep in mind that you are organizing this from the pont of view of making it as easy as possible for the producer to organize their show.

3)      In Your Stage Name Photos folder, you’ll have photos intended for their use. You must have the permission of the photographers who took the photos to use in this way, and must have a record, preferably a signed release, that states those terms, and always do your best to help the photographer get credit for those photos. I name my photos like so: JoBoobsWeldonByDonSpiro.jpg. I may add other details like JoBoobsWeldonByDonSpiroPinkDressLoRes.jpg. Obviously I don’t want the names to be insanely long, but the photographer credit in the name is never optional. What this looks like is a separate negotiation with each photographer. Their name is as important as mine – you may be the model, but they hold the copyright. You should have each photo in a lower web resolution and a high resolution, which means you have two files for each image, one for social media and one for flyers. The photos must be clear and recent and represent you realistically. It’s a good idea to have both full-body and head-shots. It’s also a good idea to have both studio and live shots – studio may, in fact, be required by some photographers. They should show you in costumes you actually own, as you are representing your body of work. You should be in costume, as you are presenting yourself as a performer. Most producers can’t use nude or pastie shots, so submit those at your best discretion.

4)      In your Bios folder, have a text document that contains the following: a tagline, if you have one, a one or two-sentence bio, a 150-200 word paragraph bio, and a two to three paragraph bio. The one or two sentence bio should be the opening of your paragraph bio, and the two to three paragraph bio should open with that paragraph. This allows them to use the amount of material they need. Sometimes that first sentence or paragraph is all you get, so make it whatever is most important to you, or the emcee of the show may end up getting your bio and use it to craft your introduction, so make it count. In that bio also have a separate document named YourStageNameCV, or whatever is an appropriate name, that is simply a list of your credits and accomplishments, so that they have that information available. Such lists can be tedious to read as well as irrelevant to readers and audiences who have never heard of the organizations from which you won awards, but htey may be useful to a producer or journalist. Some or all of the items on your CV may also be in your bios, but it is your bio, not your CV, which is most likely to be used in promotion. Always make sure you get input from other performers and producers as you write them. It is reasonable to offer to pay someone $25-50 to review or edit or coach you on your bios (and yes, I’m saying I’ll do it!).

5)      Prepare a folder of your music. Each piece of music should be labeled YourStageName_TitleOfSong.mp3. You should purchase the music in order to have the best quality file and to support the musician whose work you require to create your piece. You should not send spotify, youtube, or itunes links (unless the producer requests them, which I have never known a producer to do). It is entirely your responsibility to learn how to create and name these files as the producer requests. Do not ever ask them for that kind of instruction. Youtube is full of tutorials. I’m terrible with editing technology so I pay other people to do it for me. If you have combined music, name the file in the manner you think will best help producers curate the show and set list, and be sure they know the names of all the music in your mix.

6)      In the file named YourStageNameVideos, create a document with a list of links to your uploaded videos. You can also upload your videos here and use this sharing system to send them a link instead of youtube or vimeo, which should prevent problems with nudity or music copyright violations that can get your videos removed, clocked, or altered. Public video programs are always evolving, but many producers have told me they prefer youtube, even though many video professionals say vimeo has better quality. Never make a producer have to sign into a website to view your video.

 Above all, do not ask the producer to give you special dispensation, do not ask them a question that is answered on the website or application (I find that reading them out loud helps me get clarity), and do not talk about them on social media – they will check your page and they will see it and they will remember it. You want to be memorable for being easy to work with and making them look good. Focus all your professional energy on how you can best do that while staying true to your artistic vision, ethics, and self-care.

 Never make excuses for not being able to do what they request. It’s a pain in their ass. It will make them less likely to hire you next time. Their lives are hectic and for all you know they are living off of credit cards trying to fulfill their dreams while their kids are being bullied and they’re battling health problems. Remember that it’s hard to be human and even the people who intimidate you are fighting unfathomable battles every day. Making their burlesque life flow smoothly is a compassionate action on your part. Plus, be easy to work with and you’ll get more gigs!

 Once you’ve done the best you can, let go of the results! You’ve done all the work you can do for now, and presented yourself realistically and in your best possible light. If you’re right for the gig, you’ll get it. If you’re right for the audience of the press that’s covering you, you’ll find a new audience to love you. If you’re right for the festival, you’ll get in! And if you don’t get what you hoped for, remember that you often have no way of knowing all the factors that led to their decision, and don’t second-guess yourself. Let yourself not be tortured over whether it was because your video wasn’t up to par, or they had several people submit with the same music, or the person interviewing you really doesn’t like you. You did your best, and you can keep improving your best. There’s no need to let them define your work – you do that. You’ll find the show and audience for you!

Be the burlesque you want to see in the world!

If you have questions or suggestions, you can email me at headmistressatschoolofburlesquedotcom.

 XO

How to Send Music for Burlesque Shows

by Jo Weldon

I’ve performed burlesque to every format of music, from a  live band to a vinyl record to a cassette tape to a prerecorded CD to my own recorded CD to a flash drive to an emailed file to my iPhone. (I can tell you, I’m very glad to not have to carry a live band around with me anymore.) Technology changes fast and it’s good to be prepared for almost anything, particularly for a DJ but also for a performer.

If you are performing in a burlesque show, the best way to send music is the way the producer asks you to send it. This means you’ll have to read every email from the producer carefully from top to bottom looking for their music-sending directions. It makes them sigh when you ask a question that’s answered in the email. If you want to work with people, you don’t want to be making them sigh.

However, keeping in mind that you must read their emails, I have suggestions to be prepared for the most common ways burlesque producers like to receive their files.

1) Purchase the music. You’ll have more control and often better sound quality. I have not yet met a producer who is happy with a YouTube or Amazon link, while iTunes creates limitations with file sharing, and Spotify has held up more burlesque shows and classes than I can count (though a year from now it may be the standard, who knows). You spent hundreds of dollars on classes and costumes and rehearsal space; buy the dang music. Very importantly, this also supports the artist(s) responsible for the music. No matter how rich you think they are, you don’t know if they’re really making money, and they might just be a starving artist like yourself. Even rock stars keep getting sued for ripping off other artists and they need money for lawyers and payouts, you know.

2) Make sure the music is in the proper format. The most familiar, transferable and playable format these days is Mp3. Your music should be in that format. If you purchase from amazon.com, it will already be in that format. https://www.google.com/amp/www.digitaltrends.com/computing/how-to-convert-m4a-files-to-mp3-format/amp/?client=safari It's better not to ask a producer how to format your file into an Mp3 if it’s not already in one; the less work you make for them, the more they’ll like working with you. YouTube and other websites are full of how-to on how to format music into Mp3. Also, keep the original file. Why not? You’ve got space.

3) Name the music with your name first. The DJ will be referring a set list made up of stage names, so seeing your stage name first makes it easier for them to make a set list. Many producers like the music like so: YourStageName_TitleofSong.mp3. If you don’t know how to rename music, the internet is full of tutorials. Just imagine if you were a producer or DJ how easy receiving performers’ music in this file name format would make your life, as opposed to something like TheDogAct_YourLegalName.mp3. That just doesn’t mean anything to them. But if it helps you, save it in that format as well. Remember – you’ve got space!

4) If there is more than one track, combine it yourself into a single file. Don’t ask the DJ to play one after the other. If you don’t know how to do this, there are, as I may have mentioned, tutorials on the internet. You can name the act (as in YourStageName_TheDogAct.mp3) instead of the tune but make sure you let the producer know in your email the name of all the tunes in the file, to help reduce duplication. There are practical, logistical reasons for my suggestions. All of ‘em.

5) Create a folder on your desktop and in your DropBox or other appropriate cloud storage named Your Stage Name Music, and add all your named music files to that. You will always be able to find it. And you can send that DropBox link to anybody and they can download your music without receiving large files as email attachments. It can even be forwarded. When technology works, it’s amazing.

And while you’re at it, bring a backup on your flash drive and or phone. Why not? What harm could it possibly do?

Happy dancing, burlesquers!

As I prepare to go today to Coney Island to teach a new generation of performers, I’m thinking about things that have happened that make me happy about neo-burlesque. I’m thinking about this because as I prepare my list of links to send them, I am occasionally conflicted.

The other day I looked at a popular online burlesque news site and realized that a new fan could easily go to it and read the first five or so articles and go, Wow, do these people even LIKE burlesque? So many times I think that if someone who wasn’t involved in burlesque – a potential student, someone thinking about attending a show, a journalist – dropped by one of our online discussion forums, they would wonder why the hell we bother, when burlesque is so horrible and divided and full of social justice mistakes and gossip. Well, because there’s so much awesome going on that we bother to try to fix those things so it won’t get totally ruined! We have done and should continue to do a lot of discussion about problems in burlesque. Over time I have learned a lot, changed my ways, made major mistakes a few times a year, and have been happy to see some of those issues improve and sad to see some of them get worse. Nothing is yet beyond reproach or improvement, and thanks to social media I can, to the extent I have probably become neurotically hyper vigilant, feel naysayers’ disdain about the things that bring me joy, but there are some things that I believe in so truly that no amount of feeling those eyes roll up and down my back (thanks for the many back massages, you rollers of eyes) has yet to change my mind. I want to, right now, talk about the things that have happened that have made me, specifically me, self-interested me, happy. These are not the things I recommend anyone else should care about, but are the things with which I’ve been involved and in which I’ve been invested. I often talk about the importance of promoting what you love, so here I go doing as I say to do. Legends Night at the Burlesque Hall of Fame Weekender When I first started going to Exotic World on the goat farm in Helendale, I was blown away by what we now call Legends. They weren’t called legends at the time; they had been coming to the ranch for decades, back when they were considerably younger than I am now. I wanted everybody to see what they were: older women, proud of their adult entertainment skills, thrilled to be able to show them again when long after thought they would become of no interest to anyone, being appreciated by cheering throngs and elevated not just to their former glory, but beyond. Back then there wasn’t a special night for legends; everyone showed up at the ranch without an application and performed in the same show in broad daylight on the poolside stage in a single marathon show. I’m not saying it should have stayed the same, but I remember it fondly. I am, however, thrilled to see what it has become: a special night in a fabulous Las Vegas casino where these performers get incredible staging, have costumers fight to dress them in fabulous outfits, and get standing ovations from a thousand people. Those who don’t perform get their due in the Walk of Fame. It’s incredible. When BHOF founder Dixie Evans passed, people all over the world – literally, all over the world – got together and produced shows and classes, raising over $40,000 for her remaining medical bills and final resting place. Toni Elling has gotten funding for heating emergencies and more. I can’t even believe it. These kids today being so good to their elders. What’s up with that?

Legends Teaching Since 2006, there have been Legends presenting classes at the BHOF weekender. Many of them have never taught before. Even when the classes aren’t specifically about skill-sharing, the stories they tell are an education. And even when they say things we don’t want to hear, they have a history we’re not going to hear anywhere else. There are no cultural centers for them and their art form, no special libraries dedicated to them and no conferences about them. And there are fewer of them every year. To get to have heard them and taken part in their classes has been an honor beyond my wildest dreams. Push for Excellence Neo-burlesque has always involved skill and practice to be successful, but seeing the art form become more carefully developed and professionalized has been remarkable. I always wanted the world to be able to understand why burlesque is an art form, and when people who don’t understand see these gorgeously-executed shows, they begin to get it.

Persistence of Audaciousness Neo-burlesque would be of significantly less interest to me without the train wreck, neighborhood-oriented, or pure fuckery-mindedness of many of the shows that do not aim for excellence so much as for outrageousness. Some of these are also highly developed, though some of them will never be. I am thrilled that there is still burlesque that doesn’t give a fuck. I realize that sometimes the people focused on excellence and the people focused on outrageousness clash, blaming each other for keeping the world from taking them seriously, but that there is something for all is part of what I love.

Coney Island’s Growth The burlesque shows at Coney Island have gone from running a few times a year with practically the same cast every time to packed shows produced by dozens of producers, running at least two nights a week for six months out of the year. They are absolutely bonkers, these shows, with some of the most highly-developed and over-the-top nuttiness you can imagine, and the audience is completely devoted. It is incredible to see this arts organization survive and thrive, even through Hurricane Sandy.

BHOF New Museum Space Through many travails, the Burlesque Hall of Fame museum started by Jennie Lee and developed by Dixie Evans not only continues, but is moving into a larger space this year. I think about how cool this is almost every day. As I said before, our legends haven’t had their own cultural center outside of this. This is happening. The museum still exists. I am so grateful people will be able to see it and understand.

Slipper Room Redux The Slipper Room, one of the first places I ever performed neo-burlesque, enabled many performers to hone their art form in front of a live audience. Thousands and thousands of performances have occurred on its stage, and people from all over the world light-up at the possibility of going there, never mind performing there (we old-timers all lovingly laugh our asses off the first time those who believe the legend they see the performers’ bathroom). A few years ago it was torn to the ground, and frankly, many of us had doubts it could ever come back. But now it has returned and thousands more performances are taking place there, burlesque performances of every style, every week, and often featuring performers from the global community. I’ve been running student showcases there for over 12 years and it makes me misty-eyed to see people performing for the very first time on one of the very footprints where neo-burlesque was born over 15 years ago.

Live Burlesque Music at Duane Park Much of the history of burlesque is related to its music, and while there have always been a few shows that featured live music from he likes of Fisherman’s burlesque orchestra, there has never been anything quite like Duane Park, where there is live music and performance very night. The venue is not only devoted to it, it was rebuilt and developed with live music and burlesque in mind. This is the commitment of not just e3nergy and money but actual real estate to the art form as a fully staged, live, immersive performance style. I love it. International Burlesque Circuit While there were always people such as Julie Atlas Muz, Dirty Martini, and Tigger who had been performing burlesque internationally from the start, there was not the international burlesque circuit there now is. In the beginning when we were throwing down in drag and fetish bars with costumes we assembled off of our closet floors and with a little bit of glitter and cardboard, we had no idea there would ever be a worldwide community of burlesquer booking each other and traveling to work as there is now. You can sleep on a burlesquers’ floor and perform in their show on any continent. Burlesque is now literally not just on the map but on the globe! BurlyCon and How Burlesque Education is Actually a Thing If it wasn’t yet clear the extent to which this article reflects my personal concerns and taste, my excitement about this should confirm it. This was always my interest, and the idea of education about and in burlesque is something I have always sought to foster, even fifteen years ago when I had my website G-Strings Forever! and was trying to just let the world know burlesque was out there. The neo-burlesque movement got a good deal of its impetus at Tease-O-Rama in New Orleans in 2001, and classes were a significant part of their agenda. Not only do students benefits from an improved learning curve, and the curious have a chance to learn more, but also now performers – often struggling financially in burlesque as in so many other performing arts – are able to augment their incomes with classes. This is one of the things that makes burlesque sustainable, and also that helps burlesque performers and producers build new audiences via the people who come to see first-time students perform. It is definitely part of the expansion of burlesque and I am grateful to be part of it. More Burlesque Books And Films The number of books and documentaries that tell the stories of both vintage and neo-burlesque is truly gratifying. Over the past ten years there have been dozens. I recently took a group of my Playwrights Horizons students to Scott Ewalt’s house to see his huge collection of books, photographs, and signs, and their perception of what burlesque is totally changed when they saw that there was an entire library of study available on the topic. With the addition of the past ten years of publishing and documentary production, I can now only show my NYU students (who are too young to go to shows because of the liquor) not only what burlesque used to look like, but what it looks like now.

People of Color Getting Recognition for their influence on the history of burlesque and becoming a more visible and vocal part of the neo scene. When I first started burlesque, I had just come from a very segregated strip joint culture in Atlanta, where the assumption was not that people of color weren’t welcome in the white clubs, but that they’d rather not deal with a bunch of white people. To be fair, that was sometimes the case, but it was used as an excuse to keep the clubs separate. If POC had seen themselves at all the clubs, they would have been comfortable working there, but the vicious circle meant that since they weren’t there, they weren’t there. In neo-burlesque, the original number of performers was too small to even staff one of those strip joints, and it didn’t occur to us that the rarity of color, not just in our casts but in our history, was racist. As it grew, people of color made their presence known, got their performances seen, and spoke their history, and let people know it needed to be fixed. There is now hope for burlesque to become not just inclusive, but truly diverse. The Burlesque Hall of Fame had, for a year, their primary exhibit on people of color in burlesque, an exhibit curated by Chicava Honeychild, The Shanghai Pearl, and Dr. Ginger Snapps. This year there were more people of color teaching during the legends classes and performing on Saturday night than ever before. The winner, Miss Poison Ivory, is the first black burlesque performer to win the coveted title of Miss Exotic World in 20 years. It looks as there is a real promise of a better time to come.

The Persistence of Self-Directed Burlesque And, it remains the case that there is an entire performance field, some of it professionalized and some of it not, where performers get to be their own directors and producers, inventing their own themes and characters, designing and possibly constructing their own costumes, deciding what values they want to ascribe to, and if n one hires them they can start their own damn shows. That’s realer and truer than ever before in the history of burlesque. I love it. I really do. Best of all, the field has broadened enough that a burlesque performer can have an entire career, performing as often as anyone in their region (some regions having more opportunities than others), without paying attention to any of the venues or organizations that matter to me. They can and have built their own networks and companies and systems within and outside of what existed when I started. I make no claim whatsoever that what matters to me should matter to other burlesquers. None. You can have an entire burlesque career based solely on what inspired you and what you think is important and have none of it be any of this. If you decide that you value what I value, I can’t stop you; if you also ascribe importance to it, that’s on you. If you don’t like what I like, fly, my friend, be free, and have burlesque your way. If you like what I like, here’s the koolaid. If you don’t like what I like, make and serve your own koolaid! The New York School of Burlesque has been operating for 12 years, and I am so proud of that. Sometimes when people ask what I do for a living and I tell them I’m the Headmistress of the New York School of Burlesque, they’ll then ask how I got that job, and I’ll say, “I made it up!” When I first started doing burlesque, there were people who told me I didn’t belong there because it was too fine for someone with a background in the sex industry, it was too theatrical and I would sully it. I kept going. I’m now a university teacher without the requisite degree, a professional dancer without the formal training, a published author with a major publisher who had no previous connections in the publishing industry, and a self-invented entrepreneur without a backing investor. I’m proud of this. I got around some serious gatekeepers. I hope I’ve sullied burlesque for the better. Do it! You are the future of burlesque. I’ve been telling my students for over a decade to do whatever the fuck they want, and I mean it. As long as you are respectful of strip joint strippers and do cut the tag out of your fucking bra, it’s all good.

As I've been saying in my speeches at BurlyCon for years: Be the burlesque you want to see in the world.