#journalnine

May 17th, 2017

Stardate:  94977.56

In this journal/blog/blahblah I seem to always post when I’m having a downward spiral and I noticed that I hardly ever post when I’m feeling okay. Good even.

I decided to change that. 

Good things about today:

-My hair looks killer adorbs (albeit a bit lopsided.)

-I look pretty cute in general. 

-The effects of sparkly nail polish are real!

-I got free coffee from a handsome guy.

-Lunch was satisfying. (And yummy.)

-Life overall isn’t awful. (Which I know is a wide, general statement, and every day there are things that make life both good and bad, but for now I choose to be happy. That’s the difference so let me live in it while I can.)

This past Sunday was Mother’s Day and i got to have a great experience with my mom. She came up for dinner, which I got to buy for her with my own adult money! 

I should probably mention that all the things I’m about to say are going to potentially sound stupid to others, and that’s okay, because it’s not their muthafuckin’ blog so it doesn’t matter! Moving on!

So I drove my mum to dinner, brought her said dinner like a real person, and then afterward we spent some time milling around a beauty store nearby because we happen to share a love of beauty things. After all was said and done we cuddled on my couch and watched some TV before she left for home. 

A couple days before, actually I think the evening before I had been very down on myself about not being capable or feeling like I wasn’t progressing as fast as everyone else around me seemed to be. I have deep issues with feeling stupid or feeling like I’m failing and sometimes I just get bombarded with the idea that I’ll never be as good as I hope to be. 

So to have a few moments with my mum where I could take care of her and show her, “Hey, I’m an adult! Don’t worry, I’m okay. You really did raise me to be a survivor, thank you.” meant the world and it ended up being what I needed. It’s now Wednesday and I think in a way I’m still riding high from it so I’ll just coast on those glowing embers for as long as I can. 

The key, now, is figuring how to maintain that balance of being kind to others and also grow as a human, to treat myself and others with care. 

New goal is at hand. Let’s see how it goes. 

Source - Washington Post

Link - http://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/food/the-steakhouse-and-sauce-a-marriage-with-issues/2012/11/05/2cc5f338-22c7-11e2-ac85-e669876c6a24_story.html

Headline: "The steakhouse and sauce, a marriage with issues"

The lede accompanying this article was clever as well: "In the universe of steakhouses, there’s a coverup going on. It has advanced way beyond horseradish cream and bearnaise."

Source: The Daily Helmsman

Link: http://www.dailyhelmsman.com/bend-don-t-break-group-says-1.2947598#.UJs1aY7Sgt0

Heads up, this is a photo of terrible quality. Alright, so this isn't an error as much as it is a margin for improvement. Where it reads, "Feelings of stress, sadness, fear and anxiety..." I was confused by the jumbling of words, and would have added a comma after "but for some."

Journal Nine: Passage of the Week

Source: Vogue

Source: Vogue

Word: lugubrious - mournful, dismal or gloomy.