#john1334

I have spent a decade contemplating what love means. As a blank slate of a kid, I only cared if it was good. That hasn’t changed.

As children we are taught that from God we fell. What we forget as we grow is the grace that is there and that we must extend it in our weakness, not point fingers or judge in our guilt, arrogance, or fear.

I think as adults, we complicate everything, but especially the beautiful, ugly, uncomfortable, terrifying, and greatest worthy thing that is To Love.

But to contemplate, wrestle, and thus (as a consummate writer) write about what love means and to see the world through the eyes of how we must do better if it is ever to reflect Corinthians 13, and thus be submitted to the commandment of John 13:34, infuriates people. It’s like they take a look and think I am speaking of them specifically, and only them.

Here’s the thing: I only look at what you share and assume it must be about me…when I am feeling guilty, and I have not submitted those feelings to the Cross. To shift blame is merely an act of avoiding the ugly mess that is submitting those parts of ourselves to Him, but here’s the Good News: those things can be renewed! No! It is not comfortable! But thank God for the voices in the wilderness crying! We are not alone and it is good to be reminded how we can love each other better!

I’ve been realizing the past 2 years (I’ve always known, but come on, things get complicated) that I don’t have time for people in my life who are not willing to wrestle for better and better love and thus grow in it. But I’ve also always been the person who’s like…there’s room in the passenger seat if you want to come along.

I do not stand here on earth merely to entertain. He crafted of my mind and my hands a shrewd eye. I will never stop pleading for us to love better. I will not stop asking to know how to do it better myself. You’re welcome to be part of the process or you’re welcome to walk away. But if you’re not ready to do the good work that we are called to, then we’re merely holding each other back. I must continue to climb. He knows the way and He has called me to it.